A/N still don't own Twilight.

This is exactly why being around Alice sent shivers spiraling through my limbs. She was being cryptic and covert and perfectly Alice. She left me sitting on the bench to stew over her enigmatic lyrics. Why can't girls just say shit straight out? There is this entire cloak and dagger crap and you need a dictionary, thesaurus and a Freudian manual just to decipher it.

Fuck it, I'll sort through her psycho-babble later. Right now the only thing echoed with me was that I really didn't know Bella anymore. And she didn't even say that. It was totally implied. Like I said, I need a fucking manual.

The absolute hysterical thing about this is that if Alice had bluntly told me 'don't knock on her door because you don't really know her' I would have bitched and moaned. I would have said 'the hell with it' and fucking knocked on her door anyway. And then I would have blown it.

Alice is the absolute master of communicating and even though she played me, I got it.

A quick glance at my watch told me I had ten minutes to make it to my second and last class of the day. Jasper had somehow persuaded me to take a philosophy class. I baulked at first but then he convinced me, actually using philosophical arguments. He wasn't in my class seeing as I was just dabbling and he was majoring in it.

I wasn't in the mood to defend my existence to my professor, but it would have been worse to continue sitting on this bench and stew and wallow about my ruined plans to see Bella. I also realized that, even though Alice had some pretty valid points and was looking out for her best friend, my resentment for her interference was increasing. So off to philosophy I went, because I seriously needed the distraction. And philosophy is definitely a distraction.

After an hour and a half of trying to grapple with the concept of "I think, therefore I am," I left the building half believing I was really living in the Matrix. How did Jazz handle all this crap? Now, instead of Bella, I was expecting Neo to appear out of one of the campus security blue phones.

I was successfully preoccupied and therefore didn't notice the towering block that was Emmett standing in my path.

There were no words, just a loud "oomph" on my part as I walked into my friend.

"Geez, walk much Edward?"

"Yeah, I just can't walk through walls."

He smiled and clapped me on the shoulder. It was more like a 50-pound weight than his hand. "So you coming over tonight?" He was smiling. I couldn't help but smile too. Emmett was contagious.

"Naw, I'm not really up for it."

"Ah dude. I already told Jake you were coming over. Didn't we plan this at lunch?"

I thought back to our conversation this morning. Now that I thought about it, Emmett really didn't catch much of it. Rosalie did, because she's naturally a nosy pain in the ass. What an awesome detective she could be. She caught every inflection and expression I displayed when I questioned them about Bella and last night. Emmett, on the other hand, no fucking clue.

"I'm really not up for it, Em. I got a ton of work to do," I lied.

"Hey. It will only be for a bit. We really need your help." Emmett hesitated. "I really could use your help."

I stopped walking and looked at him. Emmett was suddenly fidgeting with his backpack strap and looking anywhere but at me.

"What's up?"

"I um… I want to pin Rosie."

I let out a smirk. I couldn't help it. Emmett looked like his parents just found his porn stash, embarrassed and bashful. Emmett noticed and glared at me.

"Sorry"

He must have accepted my pathetic apology because he started walking again. Giving a girl your fraternity pin was supposed to be this very serious thing. It didn't happen often and the house usually had a big ceremony for the guy and girl. I always considered Emmett in the same category as me. Frat life was as important anymore.

"I didn't think you cared about your pin?" I asked, trying to understand where this was coming from.

"I don't. I mean it's not a big deal to me any more. It's just that I don't have a lot of money and I want to give Rosie something. I want her to know that she's it for me. I can't give her a ring, but I can give her my pin. She can wear it, and people will know. I want her to know that she is mine. Besides, the pomp and circumstance of getting pinned will be really special for her."

"She's never asked for it and we've been together for two years now. Soon we'll be graduating. She's my world and this is the only world I can give her right now."

I let his words sink in. Emmett had never talked to me about his feelings for Rosalie. Yeah, he was talk about their kinky sex life, but this was new. This was love. This was more. This was commitment.

I reached out and gave him a quick slap on his shoulder, conveying my understanding. "Yeah, man. I'll come over tonight."

Emmett and I decided to hit the cafeteria instead of the pub for dinner. You could get seconds or in Emmett's case thirds, without wiping out your meal card. Since it was early, another advantage was that it wasn't crowded. It was perfect for the mood I was in. Somehow between his first and fourth serving of meatloaf, Emmett explained how he wanted Friday night to work.

Of course the house was still having a party, but that started at 10pm. Emmett wanted the ceremony to be at eight. We would all walk over to Rosalie's sorority house with torches and candles and bring her and her sisters back for the ritual. If there is one thing my fraternity knows, it's how to make a big production for a brother's girl. This would be perfect for Rosalie.

I left Emmett after dinner and headed back to my room. I was going to meet him in Jakes room at 8pm. This would give me just enough time to go over my labs and notes for classes tomorrow. My job was setting up the music. It's been this way since freshman year, when I introduced my friends to bands that weren't found on the radio. I think I was the first one at St. Lawrence to understand the significance of having an IPod.

I was slightly giddy from listening to all of Emmett's plans. When someone is genuinely happy, it's hard not to follow suit. I was halfway to my dorm when another thought occurred to me. It made me fucking want to skip. Bella would be at the pinning. They were sorority sisters, so of course she would be there. The gathering before the party would be small. No loud music, everyone pretty much still sober. I could talk to her, or just hang out. I could get to know Bella again.

God. What am I, seventeen years old again? I'm pathetic.

I'm fucking pathetic.

Another word to describe me right now would be lame, because after I got back to my dorm and went into my room to do some work, I left my door open. I never leave my door open. But today I did. Even though I was following Alice's advice, I longed for Bella to walk past my door. She had to do it eventually. My door was between hers and the girl's bathroom.

I even paused by her door before heading to my room, hoping to hear something, anything. I needed an indication that she was in there, to keep my aspiration alive that I might see her tonight. Just because I wasn't going to knock on her door didn't mean I had to close the proverbial door on fate, kismet, cosmic coincidence, karma, whatever the fuck you called it these days.

So do you think I got a lot of work done as I waited for destiny to show up? Fuck no.

I think I read the same page of my Native American religion book 8 times. Because, not only was I preoccupied with willing a certain someone to walk past my door, it seemed that everyone else on my hall decided to stopped by to "chat". It felt like open season on Edward.

It was getting close to 8 and reluctantly I closed my door. I hated to do it. There was no hope when my door was closed. But I wasn't going to wear my cargo pants over to a place where people vomited on a regular basis. Jake's room isn't half as bad as some of the other frat rooms. He actually had a slip cover for his sofa that he occasionally washed.

It was the end of September and the weather was starting to cool. Normally, I'd wear my carhartt jacket, but tonight, I wanted to feel the bitter air. After my epiphany with Alice, I need to just feel. The disappointment of not seeing Bella was creeping over me again and maybe the brisk night air would help my feeling of loss. I felt like a balloon. I need something, anything to fill me up, even though I can't have helium to take me to the stars.

Ironically, there were very few stars out and for the first time, I realized how dark the path from my dorm to my frat house is. The security lamps are too spread out. I can see an emergency blue phone, but it is way off the path. The wind and the clump of my boots on the pavement are the only sounds.

Is this was it was like for Bella to walk home last night?

Mentally I made a pledge to volunteer for the safe walk program that security sponsors. It's a great idea. Call a number and two students will walk you from point A to point B. It just puts a big crimp in your plans when you are a notorious junior whore, as I was last year.

The frat house is just pasted a few bushes and across a very unused street. It's interesting. No one drives around campus. You only drive away from it.

I approach the front entrance hoping to enter unnoticed. But as Murphy's Law prevails, I am not so fortunate. James is just walking up the path away from the house with his cohort, hanging on him.

"Edward, what brings you by tonight?" His tone couldn't be more arrogant.

"Just stopping by," I muster.

I loathe James, for no apparent reason than his superiority complex and his 'in your fucking face" attitude.

"I heard McCarty is gonna get some this weekend?"

I didn't respond. He was baiting me and I knew it. He just wanted to get a rise out of me by goading me about Emmett's plans for Rosalie. I walked right pass him and the skank that was attached to his arm, Victoria. They have been fuck buddies since freshmen year. It was a consensual relationship, but fucked up beyond normal comprehension. She had her boy toys and he had his conquests, but they always ended up together when the sun rose. It was sick. Beyond sick.

"Hey, you're the RA over in Dean Eaton right?"

I was passed him and almost in the house when he called out to me. I stopped and turned around of pure curiosity.

"Yeah, why?"

James stood quiet while Victoria answered. "I did safe walks last night."

"You, do safe walks?" I chuckled, absolutely amused by the prospect that self centered Victoria volunteered to help others.

"Yeah, dip shit. I'm taking Feminist Theory. It's a requirement."

James pulled her tighter to him, in a show of support. "We got a call last night for an escort to that dorm, but when we showed up, no one was there."

"Maybe they felt safer in the dark than with you." I sneered.

Victoria just held her head higher. "Well, I hope they made home safely."

"Yeah, it's a long walk," James added.

I didn't give them another thought as I pulled the door open to the house and entered. I could hear them laughing as the door closed behind me. Assholes.

There was a mixed medley of music floating from various rooms. To anyone else, it was just noise. To me, I heard Hendrix, Marley, Phish and the Stones. I thought I could faintly make out Elvis. At least someone in the house knew about the origins of modern day Rock n' Roll.

Jake's room was up the stairs and to the left. I knocked and Emmett greeted me along with Jake and Ben. Emmett came prepared. He had a list of Rosalie's favorite songs. Together, we mixed a pretty good collection of songs that connected Rose and Emmett. These were going to be played after he pinned her. My all time favorite was Faithfully by Journey. Emmett, of course, didn't understand it's significance, but I assured him that Rose would melt when it came on. It is a little known fact the girls love this song. It's ageless, like Elvis.

It was a little after 11 when I headed back. I had to promise Emmett his own "seduction CD" along with agreeing to return on Thursday to help with the house party mix before they'd release me.

The walk back to the dorm was colder now. I was still glad I didn't have a coat. There is something about the sensation of air pulling through your clothes and chilling your skin. It's frigid, and sharp and lingering, even after you come in from the cold. Your bones still ache from the sensation.

My hall was quiet. The only sound was coming from the hum of the fluorescent lights above. I entered my room and stood there in the dark. I could have turned on a light, but I didn't. I didn't want to ruin the lingering feel of the night air on my face with the harsh lights. I found my favorite sweats and undershirt and settled on my bed. I think I sat there for about five minutes before I realized my mind wasn't going to allow me to sleep just yet.

My thoughts were swirling, from this morning's catalyst of events and my yearning to help Bella, to my talk with Alice and my understanding of Emmett and Rosalie and commitment. Unconsciously, I was clenching and unclenching my fists, trying to assuage the building frustration that was building in my body. Thank God I'm an RA, because I knew exactly what I needed and had the means to do it.

I grabbed my keys and opened the door, following the same path I did this morning. Instead of turning into the RA office, I took out the master key and opened a pair of locked double doors.

Dean Eaton was an upper class dorm in the shape of a mid-evil castle with an enclosed courtyard. Being one of the older buildings on campus, it contained a large formal reception area that was used when the dorms were still segregated by sex. In the past decade, the room was transformed into a faculty lounge, where small groups gathered and faculty lectures were held. It also contained a baby grand piano.

Giving silent thanks for the key in my hand, I wondered over to the piano. The room was surrounded by curtain-less windows and I was able to find my way by the moonlight that streamed through the rectangle windows. I turned on the lamp that was situated just over the keys and pulled the bench out.

I can't really remember learning to play the piano. I was just always playing it, even in my earliest memories. I would sit by my Grandmother and listen to her play hymns on our old upright. It wasn't until later that my parents realized my passion for the instrument and they bought me a better piano and encouraged me with lessons.

I was good. I'll admit. I was probably better that good. But playing the piano was private. I wasn't a music major and I didn't want to be. Having the notes vibrate through my fingers as they danced over the keys was enough for me. It was also where I found solace and peace. It was a place where my nervous energy and twitchy fingers could exercise away their demons.

So with only a dim light from the lamp on the piano, I began playing. I started out with scales, letting my fingers loosen. Then came Bach with Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring. That was one of my grandmothers' favorites. After that I just played, picking whatever song popped into my head. I used to drive my piano teachers insane. I learned by ear and memorized the music. I could never use a metronome. She perpetually tried to get me to read music. But it would just screw me up.

I was well into some of Davis Lanz's work when I heard one of the double doors close softly. I didn't stop. Someone was probably passing through the hall and wanted to shut the door so I wouldn't wake up any residents. I continued to tap out the flowing melody. My muscles started to relax, my breathing becoming calmer. I pushed from my thoughts all the memories that plagued me and just let the music take me.

I had just started on a piece by Bach, when a rustle from the corner of the room caught my attention. I stopped and peered into the darken room.

"Don't stop." The voice that came from the darkness was soft, feminine.

"I'm sorry. I didn't realize anyone was in here," I spouted out, totally caught of guard.

Her voice was almost a whisper now. " I didn't mean to interrupt. I couldn't sleep and …it's calming."

My eyes were adjusted enough to the darkened room to where I could make out a figure. On a sofa near the far edge of the room, lay a crumpled body on a sofa. Her head seemed to be resting on her arm. I think she had a blanket covering her.

Embarrassed now that my late night retreat had intruded someone else's sleep, I started with the apologies. The quiet voice from the corner shushed me.

"I like hearing you play."

"What?" Completely caught off guard by her admission.

"The windows are normally open, in here. My room is across the courtyard. I can hear you sometimes when you play. It's beautiful."

"Thank you." It was all I could think to say. It was the first time that anyone in the dorm has acknowledge hearing me play. I wasn't dumb enough to think that no one noticed the music coming from the lounge; I just never had someone actually compliment me on it before.

"Please continue," she pleaded.

It was in that instant, that moment, when I absorbed the sound of her voice that I realized who it was across the room from me. Bella.

My heart started to beat faster at being in such close proximity to her. All day, I had been thinking of her, wanting to see her, to talk to her. And finally here she was, cloaked in darkness, a few feet away from me.

I wanted to move towards her, say something, say anything, but I couldn't. I wanted to see her, and silently cursed the dark room. Her voice was pleading though, with hints of sadness. As much as I wanted to go to her, I couldn't deny her request.

So I continued playing, starting this time with Beethoven and then moving on to more modern compositions. I poured my feeling and longing into the notes of the instrument. My fingers felt renewed and I was no longer playing to appease my soul, but to help hers. I silently prayed that the music would sooth her as it always soothed me.

I don't know how long I played. It really didn't matter. Minutes. Hours. Time seemed paused for us. It was only when I caught the repetitive yawns coming from her side of the room that I halted. I didn't want the evening to end, but I knew she was tired. She had to be exhausted. I also couldn't deny my longing to hear her voice again.

"What was that last piece?" she questioned before I could speak.

"The one I just played?"

"Yeah, I've heard if before." Her voice sounded lighter.

"Promise you won't laugh?" I questioned, not being at all serious.

She giggled. It was music to my ears. "I promise," she called from across the room. God, what I wouldn't give to see her face right now.

"It's called The Prayer. It was in 'A Quest for Camelot'. It's my mom's favorite song."

Another giggle. "Why would I laugh at that?"

"I don't know. Maybe because it's from a cartoon movie and I play it because of my mom. It's kind of embarrassing" I was hoping the single lamp on the piano wasn't showing my flushed cheeks.

"My favorite movie is Beauty and the Beast."

My smile grew, and all the tension and mystery surrounding my apprehension about talking to Bella melted away. Sharing this most mundane piece of personal information made me relax. I was no longer stressing about what I would say to her, afraid that I would make her nervous. I wasn't going to bring up this morning, but this effortless exchange renewed my resolve. She was talking to me, just like Alice had predicted.

God, I love Alice.

"Think we should probably head back," I muttered.

Bella hesitated before sitting up on the couch.

It was more of a question, than statement on my part. I sensed she didn't want to return to her room, but I longed to walk her towards that destination. I craved looking at her eyes.

"We do have class tomorrow," I reminded her, but my voice held no conviction.

"Did you do the reading?"

"No." I didn't even entertain the thought of lying to her. I couldn't find it in me.

We were both stalling, not wanting to leave the comfort of the lounge. But I wanted to see her. The dim outline of her on the couch wasn't enough. I needed to see her face again. I needed to see that she was okay. So I did the only thing I could think of and for the second time today, I abused my position as a RA.

"Can I walk you back? I kind of have to lock the lounge back up."

"Yeah, sure." She stood up from the sofa and pulled what looked like a handmade blanket around her arms. Her eyes were looking down. "I didn't mean to keep you." Her voice sounded broken as she passed by me, heading towards the door.

"Bella." I must have spoken louder that I thought, because she turned abruptly back to me. "It's nice to have an audience… Thank you." I must have looked like an idiot. My smile couldn't get any bigger. I needed her to believe that I wanted her there without making her uncomfortable.

It worked. In the dim light hovering over the piano, I saw her smile. It didn't reach her eyes, but it was soft and genuine.

I waited till she reached the doors before turning off the only light. I made my way to where she was waiting. We backed up into the hall as I locked the doors. The hall lights were brighter and when I turned, I finally got a good look at her.

Her brown hair was wavy and everywhere, absolutely unkempt. Strands were cascading down the sides of her face, covering her blushing cheeks. Her lips were cracked and her skin extremely pale. Her eyes just held a tinge of red in them as if she had spent the day crying. Her button nose was also pink.

She was wearing a baby blue tank top and cotton sleep pants with extremely fuzzy pink socks. It wasn't a big knit blanket covering her arms. It was more like a wrap.

"My grandmother made it."

"Huh?" She lifted up the wrap slightly. My face burned as I realized she caught me staring at her.

"It's beautiful."

"Thanks,"

Slowly, we started walking back towards our rooms. The silence between us was nice, but a swirling sensation began building in my stomach with each step we took. I didn't want to let her go. I didn't want her to be alone. As if she sensed my unease, she turned towards me and I caught a slight spark in her deep brown eyes. Maybe it was the overhead fluorescents, maybe not. But she still looked lost and I wanted to help. Her mouth opened to say something, but then she tripped. There were three innocuous steps situated in the middle of the hall. I remembered but she didn't.

I reached out to grab her, but she quickly caught herself with both hands on the railing. The knit blanket fell to the floor.

I stood there shocked as I saw her bend over to retrieve her cover. Her arm closest to me was purple and blue. There was a sickening looking bruise that lay squarely between her shoulder and elbow and circled her entire arm. But that wasn't what caused me to bite my cheek to keep from grasping. When she tripped, her hair fell away from her shoulders and neck revealing several deep long penetrating scratches. They were bright red, puffy and just starting to scab over.

I let her get the blanket situated around her before I was able to meet her eyes. There was no way to cover up what I saw. The only thing I could do was not call attention to it. She knew the bruises were there. She didn't need me to remind her or make her feel even more self-conscious. So silently I waited for her to collect herself and we continued our journey to our rooms. I prayed my silence would help put her at ease.

We reached her door and we both lingered.

"Thank you," she said, looking up through her thick lashes.

I knew what she meant. I had helped her this morning and I didn't question her few moments ago. Her words penetrated me, making me blush again.

"You're welcome, Bella." I wanted to touch her, to reach across the small space between us, but I didn't dare.

I was right in thinking something had happened last night to Bella. I was also placing my bets on Alice and her premonition that Bella would open up to me. I just had to be patient. Suddenly, that was something I had no problem doing. I sent her my warmest smile before turning towards my door, two spaces down. I was just about to open it, when her soft voice caught me.

"Edward?"

"Yes."

"How did you get into my room this morning?"

Again, I couldn't lie to her. "There is a master key in the RA office. I used it to get in your room."

"Do you still have it?"

"Yeah, I forgot to put it back."

"Can you keep it? Tonight? I don't want to wake up the dorm again." Her voice was pleading and again, I couldn't deny her.

"I'll keep it," my voice strong, as if I could send her my strength. "You'll be safe." I passed a crooked smile her way, desperately wanting her to know she was safe.

She smiled in return, and entered her room. With the soft click of her door, she was gone.

I lingered in the hallway, absolutely torn. Every instinct pushed me to knock on her door and hold her. Comfort her. Whisper into her ear that I would protect her.

But I didn't. A voice spoke to me from deep within my subconscious.

Be patient

I would be. I would wait. I would be her friend. I would watch over her, defend her, even though I had no idea what I was protecting her from.

I entered my room and sunk into the bed. I kept my door open and gingerly played with the master key.

Bella would be safe. I would make sure of it. I also would be there, in case she cried out again in the night.

For the first time in 4 years, I kept my room door open, laid on my bed and waited.

A/N Sorry this took so long to post. RL sucks sometimes. I hoped you liked this chapter. It was hard to write because I wanted their meeting to be perfect.

So let me know what you think. Review Review Review. The more I get, the faster I write. Coming up soon, is the party at the Frat house. How do you think Bella will handle it?