A/N: ok, for any and all loyal readers: I'm SORRY! College makes it hard to write [harder than I anticipated] so it took me a long time to get this chapter out. In addition I'm really trying to make this story better. I rely on dialogue too much, I think, and I dunno I feel like the story is dragging and characters aren't getting properly developed. I kinda rushed this chapter, but I hope you guys like it. I need your opinions(i.e REVIEW!)!
The three of them eventually made their way to the living room. Zexion was already sitting on the end of the couch, book closed, and seemingly waiting for them. He took one look at Roxas's face and tensed a little, as if he knew what was wrong without asking. Which, with him, was quite possible.
Axel had been more or less in a constant state of shock and confusion since Roxas's statement about DiZ. Sure, he'd managed to subconsciously associate DiZ with loosing Roxas, and losing Roxas is bad, but…this was a new life. They had their hearts. He didn't have to worry about Roxas disappearing on him again, right?
Right. He'd just found Roxas, dammit. He wasn't going to lose her again.
Axel sat on the floor in front of the couch, looking up at the trio and struggling to beat down the feeling that he really didn't belong. "What the fuck, guys?"
Zexion turned to Axel and apparently decided to take initiative – as Demyx was a little preoccupied fussing over Roxas, who looked rather shell-shocked. The fact that the blue haired, emo boy, (as Axel so affectionately dubbed him), had chosen to answer Axel and with a minimal amount of distaste on his features, well, it was comforting to know there were no hard feelings. Honestly, Axel had always rather liked Zexion. Even if he was a bit of a stiff.
"DiZ has escaped."
Well, maybe there were a few hard feelings. Zexion had always been a smart ass. Bastard. "Yeah, Zex, I got that much. But what's the deal? Escaped from where?"
Zexion's expression was as deadpan as his tone. "A mental institution."
Axel didn't bother to hide his shock. "A what?"
Demyx sighed and turned to Axel, one arm still wrapped protectively around Roxas's shoulders – who seemed to have recovered from her daze and looked more thoughtful than anything else. "DiZ has his memories, just like the rest of us." He shot a sidelong glance at Roxas that had Axel narrowing his eyes ever so slightly – though out of jealousy or curiosity, even he wasn't sure. "The thing is, DiZ can't really tell the difference between the past life and this one. He thinks, that because the Organization members are still alive, he still has to reunite Roxas and Sora and destroy the rest of us."
Axel listened with rapt attention. He certainly hadn't expected anything like this. And through it all the primary thought in Axel's mind was: that should be my arm around Roxas's shoulders. "So…that means…" Axel's stomach clenched almost painfully. "He'll be looking for Roxas."
Demyx nodded, but it was Roxas who spoke. "He tried to kidnap me before, that's how he got committed to the institution in the first place."
Axel straightened, and had his position allowed it, he would've pulled Roxas into a protective embrace and stayed that way until DiZ was caught or killed. He didn't care which. "He what? How?" Then a frightening thought occurred to Axel: "Does this mean he knows where you live?"
Roxas nodded. "Yeah. He found Dad at the house, and I that's when he saw me. I don't know what he would've thought if Sora had been home that day… he followed me to school about a week after he threatened my dad and…confronted me outside the building after class. I didn't really know what he wanted…it was the first time I'd seen him, you know, here.
"So, he tried to kidnap me. Told me all kinds of shit like how he knew why I had the keyblade and that he could give me the answers I sought. It was really unnerving…hearing that stuff again…It was just like before."
No, no, no! Axel tried to quell the panic pooling in his gut. He couldn't do this. He couldn't lose Roxas again! And the fact that it was roughly the same way he'd lost her/him/whatever the first time only made the blow even harder to take. Axel stared intently at Roxas and only vaguely took notice of the fact that his nails were now digging painfully into his palms.
"Ok," Axel said slowly. He had never been good at controlling his anger – or his jealousy, for that matter – so took quite a lot of his energy not to stand up and start breaking things, particularly DiZ's face, (had he been present). Axel was certain that had he still had his powers over fire, he would've burned down Demyx's house by now…or at least the living room. "So, what do we do?"
There was a pregnant silence. Demyx looked at the ground, Zexion watching him. Roxas had been staring at her lap for several minutes now, and when she finally stood up the movement was so quick and sudden that it caused Demyx to squeak in surprise.
"There's nothing we can do," she said flatly. Her tone made Axel stiffen more than her words. Roxas used to talk like that, back in the Organization days, stoic and impassive, as if she really didn't care about anyone or anything. Including herself.
Axel hated it.
"But Roxie –" Demyx started, standing as well.
"No," she shook her head, ruffling a hand through her hair in a tired manner. "Come on, Demyx, what can we do? We just have to be a little more cautious, that's all. Beside," Roxas cringed, "Lexeaus and Yuffie are heading over to tell Dad. He'll have me and Sora under constant paranoid surveillance, and we're the ones DiZ was after before…" She turned a hard eye on the other three, "but you guys had better watch your backs too. I'm sure DiZ thinks he'll to use Sora to kill you guys, but that doesn't mean he won't try anything himself. So be careful. Which reminds me." She glanced around the living room, patting the pockets of her jeans absently – Axel watched this movement with a look that was slightly less than innocent. "I didn't bring my cell phone with me. If Dad tried to call and realizes I…don't… Good Lord."
Roxas's gaze had traveled to the window now, and before anyone could question her last statement they heard the front door burst open and seconds later a very panicked, very anxious looking Xemnas stormed into the room. Unpleasant memories of Xemnas turning that very look on him many a time before had Axel instinctively shrinking back a little.
"Roxas!"
Roxas spun around to face her father, who had moved to stand in front of her before anyone could completely register what was happening. "Dad? What the hell –"
Xemnas reached forward and gripped Roxas's shoulders. Zexion held his hand out to stop Axel from getting up and interfering like he used to – although, this time, Xemnas wasn't threatening Roxas. "Did you hear?!" Xemnas shook Roxas's shoulders gently. "Why weren't you answering your phone?!"
It took Roxas a moment to respond. Axel wondered what it was like to have a former emotionless Superior turn over-protective parent. "Why didn't you just call Demyx's house?" Roxas looked at her father incredulously. "You knew I was –"
"Dammit, Roxas! He's escaped!" At that moment Xemnas seemed to finally notice the other three in the room and regain some of his composure. When he spoke again, his voice was slightly calmer. "Num –" Xemnas paused to clear his throat. "Lexeaus has just informed me that DiZ has escaped. I have told Sora to remain at home with Cloud and I've come to pick you up. I don't feel comfortable with you walking anywhere right now."
Axel was surprised. If Xemnas had had any form of emotion while he was a Nobody, he'd hidden it well. To see Xemnas so concerned – for Roxas's welfare no less – was more than a little surreal for Axel. It completely changed his view of the man. Even when Xemnas tried to bring his voice back to that monotone, impassive level he used to use, there was no denying the hint of worry in his words.
Roxas had recovered from the initial shock somewhat, and even she seemed to be falling back into old habits. Her back was incredibly straight, her face calm, and she returned her father's gaze easily.
"Right. Well, I wish you would just call next time, instead of barging in like a madman."
To Axel's surprise, Xemnas smiled. "I'll remember that. Now come on, we need to get home before Sora decides to escape in my absence." And with that, Xemnas gave a brief nod to Demyx and Zexion, and turned towards the door.
Axel glanced over at Roxas to find the blond staring back at him with a hesitant expression. Axel supposed she was wondering the same thing he was:
Was Axel coming with them?
Xemnas, as if hearing their concerns, stopped and threw a glance at the redhead over his shoulder. "You coming, Axel?"
Perhaps it was a testament to the fact that Axel had grown up a lot – or the fact that Roxas's father and his former Superior had said it – but Axel was able to effectively ignore the innuendo.
Roxas looked with wide eyes at her father and Axel presumed he must have had a similarly shocked expression because Xemnas responded by rolling his eyes at the two of them. "If Axel is anything like I remember him," Xemnas shot a pointed glance at said redhead, "he will do anything to protect you. And besides, you two were practically joined at the hip; he'd end up at our house one way or another." Xemnas turned and continued towards the door, but not before throwing one more look at Axel. "Though I know that this time Axel will be a perfect gentleman."
And on that note Xemnas opened the door and made his way to the car. Axel and Roxas said their quick goodbyes, everyone promising each other to be careful, and followed.
…
The car ride to the house was nothing short of awkward.
Roxas and Axel sat together in the back seat – the passenger side seatbelt had been broken for months due to a particularly unpleasant incident regarding Roxas, Riku, a bucket of fried chicken, and several rubber bands. The Strifes didn't like to talk about it.
Not to mention Xemnas kept glancing rather conspicuously at them through the rear view mirror.
Roxas sat rigidly next to Axel, about a foot of seat separating the two. Her hands were sweating rather uncomfortably, (was it always this hot in April?), and Roxas had to consistently remind herself to not start bouncing her leg. She may have felt awkward as hell, but Axel sure didn't need to know that. If Roxas had ever experienced tension you could cut with a knife, it was now. But then, it had always been that way with Axel.
So there they sat Roxas crossed her arms defiantly over her chest, though whether to keep Axel at bay or keep her own hormones from exploding in the most embarrassing an inappropriate way possible, she wasn't sure. In the Organization, it was vastly assumed that Axel was a sex obsessed maniac and Roxas was the timid youth who couldn't say 'no'.
This, of course, was bullshit.
Roxas was far from timid – she was more antisocial, there's a difference – and she sure as hell was able to say 'no' she just, more often than not, chose not to. And Axel would be the first to confirm this. No, Roxas initiated more than her fair share of 'intimate moments' to put it delicately. She just had enough sense to tell the right time from the wrong time, and enough self control to keep her hands where they should be, and not where they really, really wanted to be.
So now as the car crawled the relatively short distance home – Xemnas suffered from the kind of paranoia that kept him driving 5 miles under the speed limit, even in 15 mile-per-hour zones – Roxas found the situation oddly familiar. She wanted so badly to just jump the redhead, and honestly had since he'd arrived, but after the sheer awkwardness of the reunion and Axel's denial of his feelings, (ok, so he didn't deny he loved Roxas, but it had the same effect anyway), she knew better than to try anything. Plus, Xemnas would kill the both of them.
Roxas studied Axel out of the corner of her eye. At first glance, the oversized redhead seemed as nonchalant as can be. Axel slumped down in his seat, overly long legs sprawled in front of him to the point where his knees brushed the back of the seat, and crossed his arms loosely over his chest in a manner that just screamed "tension? What tension?".
Roxas smirked in spite of herself. Axel was no doubt not handling this as well as he wanted it to appear, and unfortunately for him, Roxas knew the redhead well enough to notice the way his eyes kept darting around the car, or how his fists kept clenching and unclenching.
Roxas really wanted to clear up this shit with Axel, but it was hard to get a moment alone with the guy. Other than during the walk to meet Demyx, they hadn't really had any time to themselves.
Roxas was pulled from her thoughts when her father, for what was undoubtedly the billionth time, checked the rearview mirror suspiciously.
"Ugh, good lord, Dad!" Her sudden – and rather loud – outburst cut through the silence and made the other two occupants of the car jerk with surprise. "What the hell do you think we're gonna do? Watch the road!"
Roxas slumped down and stared out the window, ignoring Axel's gaze and her father's indignant mutterings the rest if the drive home.
…
An hour later Roxas walked into her room and shut the door quietly behind her. Sora had been waiting for them when they got home. He seemed less than pleased at being forced to spend his Saturday under the watchful eye of their overly paranoid father. Riku and Kairi had promised to visit later, which lifted Sora's mood somewhat. Xemnas had spent the last hour discussing safety precautions before the phone finally rang and distracted Xemnas long enough for the teens to escape. Sora ran off into his room to play video games and Cloud had set up the guest room for Axel – who was currently making use of their shower, giving Roxas a much needed moment alone.
Roxas leaned her back against the door with a sigh, staring blindly at the dimness that enshrouded her bedroom. It was a mess, like usual. Clothes piled up in the corner, abandoned homework strewn lazily about. (Did she have a paper Monday?) Roxas figured she probably should tidy up a bit, but she honestly wasn't sure she had the energy. So many things had happened in the past 24 hours and it was really hard dealing with it all.
Walking over to the bed she flopped down heavily. Her whole body ached. Between Demyx playing at the bar, Axel returning, Axel telling her he didn't know if he loved her, the guilt, DiZ…it was too much. The stress was really piling up, and Roxas was trying, really trying, not to fall back into old stress habits. She'd been doing pretty well the past couple of months, but the last day or so had her really needing some sort of release. Roxas smirked. She knew the perfect way to release some tension, but it didn't look like that was happening anytime soon…not with Axel being a damn flake.
Roxas was tempted to bitch about men and their fear of commitment, but it seemed a too little cliché and hypocritical for her taste. Still, she couldn't help but be a little angry at Axel. In the last life, he'd promised to meet her again, told her he loved her, said…so many things. Did it really mean nothing? Roxas had always hoped he'd meant it, even when she didn't believe he could. Honestly, the more she thought about it, the angrier and more depressed she got. Axel's return was the moment she'd waited for her whole life. A day she both longed for and dreaded. Whether he knew it or not – and knowing Axel, she bet he didn't – he held her future happiness in his hands. And now that she was so close…
Roxas's fingers twitched uncomfortably, and before she realized what she was doing, she found herself staring intently at the top drawer of her nightstand. She knew exactly what she was thinking – well, duh – and she also knew it was a bad idea. Ever since Sora confronted her last year and threatened to tell dad – Roxas visibly shuddered at the thought – she'd dropped the habit completely.
But…fuck. Roxas knew it was wrong, even as she sat up and pulled the drawer open tentatively staring blankly at the box lying inside. Her fingers twitched again, and Roxas could almost feel her arms tingling. It wasn't like this was the worst thing she'd done in her life…but considering how hard Roxas tried to keep from falling prey to stereotypes…this would probably be hypocritical.
Roxas buried her face in her hands. Dammit, this was too hard.
…
A/N: Ok, I hate that. But this is a learning process. I'm trying to cram in some more angsty/drama-y goodness, so, be patient with me please. It's taking forever cus this is my first time doing this and I'm not too pleased with the outcome so far, so I'm working hard on making this better. I hope to edit it after I've completed the story.
As always REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW! You guys really give me the drive to keep trying.
