Inuyasha sat on the window ledge, gripping its pane so hard that his knuckles were white, and the wood began to crack. He ground his teeth together trying to keep his temper under control for Kagome's sake. His mind was spinning as a thousand thoughts swarmed at once. Kagome didn't have to tell him what her mom said, he was tailing the car the whole time there and back and he heard it all. He didn't want to expose that he was that worried about her, so he let her tell the story again. He was angry, and getting angrier as he listened. Not only was he angry because Kagome couldn't return with him, but also because she didn't fight as hard as she could to come back. He felt betrayed, and like he meant nothing to her. Were his feelings unrequited? That anger brought back unwanted memories and feelings. The thought of Kikyou betraying him fifty-some years ago shot to the forefront of his mind and stabbed at his heart. Although the betrayal wasn't quite to that degree this time, to him, it felt like someone sliced open an old wound and dug deep with the point of their arrow, scratching the wound raw.
"Is there no chance you can come back? What does your mom know?" Inuyasha barked.
"There's nothing I can do. I tried. My mom is dead set. And it's not like I can just leave… I'd have to come back sometime to get the things I need and then I'll never get out of the house!"
"There's got to be something we can do! I'm not going to let you stay away."
"Inuyasha..." Kagome allowed a smile to tug at her face. She knew she would miss him, but she didn't know it was the other way around.
Inuyasha caught on immediately about what she was grinning about and he felt his face get hot with blushing. He thought hard and fast on a cover-up. "I mean, Shippo would never shut the hell up if I let you stay here. Sango and Miroku would never let me forget it until the day they died!"
Kagome kept smiling as an awkward silence crept along. Moments felt like hours while Inuyasha stared at Kagome, her gaze locked on the ground. Inuyasha used it as an opportunity to get around it or convince her mother otherwise. Then he remembered the last time he went against her, and how Kagome's mom was the only person to scare the shit out of him, second only to Kagome herself.
"Inuyasha," Kagome whispered, interrupting his brain storming. He watched as she took the Sacred Jewel from around her neck and held it out to him. "Take this back with you. I know you still want to become a full fledged demon, so take it back."
"Kagome…"
"Or, you could…you could give it back to Kikyou. With the power of the Jewel, she can be brought back to life." Kagome's throat hitched. She felt that all too familiar stinging sensation behind her eyes.
"Kagome, are you okay? I smell tears." He asked concerned.
"Yeah, it's just my arm." She lied.
"Oh, okay." Inuyasha replied. He reached out and gently took the Shikon no Tama from Kagome's hand eyeing her.
God he's so dense. Kagome thought choking back her tears. She knew Inuyasha would give the Sacred Jewel back to Kikyou to bring her back to life. It's not like she could really be there for Inuyasha anymore, so why should it bother her? She thought for a moment about telling Inuyasha what she really meant to say so many times before.
Inuyasha, I love you…
She would never dream of actually admitting this to him of course. Duh! He doesn't care for her like that! He loves Kikyou! He'll bring the Jewel right back to her and they'll live out the rest of her days together.
But Inuyasha was thinking the same thing. He wanted to tell her everything he meant to tell her. To tell her how much the hurt in her eyes shot pain through him as well when he and Kikyou were caught together. How scared he was whenever she was hurt, or was taken from him. He just wanted to tell her:
Kagome, I need you…
But Kagome wouldn't love a half-breed like him. Why should she? Kagome would have no problem finding a guy that's perfect for her. That Homo, or was it Hobo... Anyway, that guy sure did seem to like her, why wouldn't she go for him? No. Inuyasha had to at least try. He couldn't keep it from her anymore. He had to tell her how much she pulls his heartstrings.
"Kagome..." He said quietly. "Kagome I think I-"
"You need to go Inuyasha."
"No, what I have to say is important." He said.
Then he heard the footsteps coming up the stairs. "Inuyasha you have to go or I'll get in serious trouble!"
Inuyasha stood still for a moment before turning towards the window clenching his fists tight again. He was just about to hop out of the window when Kagome whispered so quietly, only his dog ears could hear her.
"Please come back soon, Inuyasha."
He nodded as he leapt from the window and hit the ground running to the well. He damned himself for nearly exposing himself to her. They couldn't be together anyway if she couldn't come back to him. It would have just been something else to piss him off. He growled to himself and, clutching the Jewel tight, he jumped into the well back to feudal Japan.
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"Kagome?" Her mom poked her head into her room, looking at her daughter clearly in distraught. "Are you okay? Why are you crying?"
"I'm fine mom. I just need more pain killers." She answered. But she didn't think they made a pain killer strong enough to dull this kind of pain. Pain of the heart…
"Pain killers coming up!" She laughed at her own joke.
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Inuyasha crawled out of the well and began to walk toward Kaede's hut. He could hear Shippo's yell already. "Inuyasha, you idiot, how could you let Kagome stay there?"
Then Miroku would pitch in followed by Sango. Inuyasha sighed as he walked. He wished so much that he'd just taken Kagome and brought her back here. At least then he'd have more time with her; even if it was just her yelling and sitting him.
Kaede's hut came into view in the distance and Inuyasha slowed his pace. Kouga would try to kill him when he heard Kagome wasn't coming back. Not that Inuyasha was worried, but Koga was such a pain. Although now that he didn't have the Jewel shards in his legs, it should be a cinch to beat him.
Inuyasha stopped about a hundred yards away from Kaede's hut. He shook his head and walked into his forest. He didn't want to deal with everyone yelling at him right now. He just wanted to be alone, and he could deal with them tomorrow. He leapt into one of the tallest trees in his forest and nestled himself in. He basked in the moonlight and took in the breeze.
The wind blew towards him carrying with it many different scents from different things. Each scent brought another thought about Kagome. Except for the scent that resembled Kagome the most, but meant the complete opposite. Inuyasha could see the faint glow of the soul collectors that identified Kikyou's presence nearby. She must sense the Jewel's completion.
His steady stride quickly dissolved into a frantic sprint. The thought of Kikyou took center stage in his mine, while Kagome became an understudy. The thought of what Kagome said roared and he could hear it ringing in his ears. He could bring her back! His once beloved will take her first breath since death! His run goes fully demonic as the scent became stronger and more familiar. Memories associated with this smell swam in his head and his heart beat quickened and felt like it would crack his ribs until he saw her. His heart skipped a beat when he laid eyes on her being. Lounging in the tree she pinned him to, Kikyou absorbed the souls brought to her, making her glow ever so slightly. She almost looked…alive, or was that his mind showing him what could be…
"Inuyasha," Kikyou said. "You have the Jewel. I can sense it."
Inuyasha's steps slowed before he stopped, a few yards away from her.
"Kikyou," He said. "I know that the hatred you felt for me when you died is still in your heart… What I don't know is if there's any love left."
"And what if there is, Inuyasha? Will you really use the Jewel to bring me back to full life?" Kikyou asked in her all knowing, monotonous voice.
Inuyasha looked down at jewel. She could always tell his intentions and it drove him nuts. But he also enjoyed it; he didn't have to explain things in that emotional way. Unlike how he had to with Kagome…
He looked back up to see Kikyou's soul collectors carrying her back to the ground and she walked toward him. Her grip tightened around her bow and Inuyasha grabbed the hilt of the Tetsusaiga
"Do you love me, Inuyasha?" She asked when she was about ten feet away.
"Y-yes." He answered.
Kikyou walked closer to him and he held out the Jewel to her.
"Do you really want me back to life?"
Inuyasha nodded holding the Jewel out to her even more.
"Do you realize that once I regain my life, Kagome may not ever be born? Or she may have never come here, and you will forget everything about her."
Inuyasha pulled the Jewel away immediately and stared at Kikyou. Should he choose the woman who tried to kill him over fifty years ago, or the girl who stayed by his side straight to the end of Naraku. He looked down at the Jewel in his hand contemplating the consequences and benefits each would have.
"Kikyou…"
