Okay so I'm writing this sober and it sucks. I had an awesome thanks giving, at food, worked, got trashed, hope you guys had as much fun as I did! I know these chapters are a bit slow and not filled with quite as much but it will pick up I promise just got to get passed this Bruce Wayne being kidnapped shtick.
Anonymouse: great fucking name man.
Chapter 21
They finally arrived. Harley and Artemis went around back where the musicians were waiting. Two pretty red head singers were sitting together on the other side of the building. Harley walked over to one and smashed her large hammer into one of the girls head. The other began to scream and attempted to run away. Artemis caught up and slit her throat before she could say anything.
The two of them came around the corner and the musicians turned around to look at them. "Where are Mary and Sally," asked one.
"Well Mary has a headache and Sally's throat is sore," said Artemis with a smile, "we are taking over for them." Behind her Harley was trying not to giggle at the bad joke. The others just shrugged and lead them backstage.
Meanwhile, the Joker was setting his henchman and the boys up, Damian took over as a cook, and Joey served drinks. The Joker watched as the two girls took the stage and everyone clapped. It was almost time for the show to begin.
Bruce was nervous, very nervous, he had a room full of people. He was hoping that after last years fiasco not many would show up but they did. He was going to get kidnapped by the Joker and hopefully Artemis was dumb enough to fall for the letter and let him go. He did not realized just how smart she had grown sense two months ago. As far as Bruce was concerned she was just another nutcase looking for a good way to spoil society. She was not too happy about having the Joker hanging around at first, it was obvious, but he was not even sure if she still wanted a way out.
It didn't really matter, he would have her and her two friends locked up this time, he didn't need another killing spree and crime rate climb like last time. He didn't show how nervous he was. He played it cool.
"Bruce you are sweating," complained one girl, what was her name again? He never could remember these bimbo's names. He remembered Rachel's name, he remembered Harley's name, he remembered Selene's name, he remembered Artemis's name, but that was about the extent of his knowledge of women's names.
"It's nothing," he said with a high pitched voice, "just hot!"
"You sound scared," she nagged. He was half tempted to tell her to just take a hike. He just shook his head and looked back at the stage. There was Artemis and Harley, now where or where were the others? Joey came walked up to him. He narrowed his eyes at the boy, they never actually met face to face except once.
"Can I get you anything to drink, sir," said Joey. Was that sarcasm in his voice? A well, he was there to kidnap him, not cater to him.
"Sure," he mumbled.
"Anything to eat," he asked. Joey was smirking at him now. Wait, was he going to kill him? That wasn't part of the Joker's plan!
"Whatever," he said. Joey walked off. Bruce could fell his nerve begin to collapse even more.
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"Done," said Damian, holding up Bruce's food with the Joker's card hidden strategically in it.
"Jeez," said Joey, "it's suppose to look real but you didn't have to get all fancy with a cheese burger and some fries."
"Rich people like their food to look fancy," said Damian, "aren't they all, like, refined and shit?"
"You're not fit to be a rich man's cook," said Joey, shaking his head.
"Why the hell not," snapped Damian.
"Cause it's just not you," argued Joey.
"Ha! You'll see! I'll be the best damn cook Bruce Wayne ever had," said Damian in a dramatic way.
"Sure," said Joey walking away. He felt a sharp pain on the back of his head and spun around. "Did you just throw a spatula at my head?
"Who, me," he asked, "I didn't do anything, somebody's throwing stuff man, I don't know, you gonna give that cheese burger to Wayne or what?"
Joey rolled his eyes and walked out. He put the burger in front of Bruce and a glass of wine. Bruce observed the oxymoron display. "Um, the cook went a bit over the top for a cheese burger."
"I don't know man, he says he is going to be the best cook you ever had, I got other people to serve."
Joey turned to leave and Bruce took a bite into the burger. He felt a piece of cardboard and spat it back out. He opened the sandwich and found a Joker's card in it. The show was seconds from beginning. "What's that," asked Bruce's bimbo of the night.
"It's a card," he said throwing it to the side.
"Is that one of the Joker's card's," she asked jumping up. Bruce grabbed her by the wrist and forced her back down. He needed to come up with an excuse to make her stop drawing attention.
"Sit down," he whispered, "if he is here he will find us." Her eyes grew to the size of dinner plates. Bruce didn't know it was physically possible but apparently so. She looked around shaking as she, too, tried to play it cool.
Bruce heard a glass click and a man stood up. It was Lucius signaling that he had an announcement to make. Bruce wanted to choke him. That was almost always the cue time for the Joker. Now it was just a question of when he would appear.
"I have worked for the Wayne company for almost thirty years and Bruce is by far one of the most successful employers I have ever had the pleasure of working for. " BANG BANG BANG! The crowed ran around screaming as the Joker waltzed into the main room. A few clowns poured in behind him. Harley pulled her giant hammer out and Artemis pulled out a couple knives. Joey pulled out his shot gun and aimed it at Bruce's head. Artemis and Harley walked off stage.
"Hey," said one of the musicians, "you lied!"
Artemis turned around and shot him in the face with her own pistol. She put it back and turned her attention back to Bruce. His eyes shifted toward her and toward the Joker. The relation was uncanny. She was a much prettier version of the Joker. He looked back at her and she winked at him. The Joker took the microphone from Lucius.
"You know, I think you arrange these, uh, little parties just so I can attend. I do like crashing these, uh, masquerade's you put on. So, uh, Brucy, you turning 30 years old today. Well, happy birthday, you now get to be one of the grownups. So, as a gift from, uh, me to you. I'm taking you for a little field trip and the pathetic people of Gotham get to play a game with me." He put the ransom letter on the table and ordered Joey to escort him out to the van. Artemis and Harley kept their eyes on the rest of the room. If anyone moved they died.
The Joker made his way to the exit with the girls last. "Where's Damian," he asked, running down the stairs out the door.
"Who knows," said Joey, "said he was going to be the 'best cook Bruce Wayne ever had' whatever the fuck that's suppose to mean."
"Well get him and tell him it is time to go, NOW!" Joey quickly released Bruce and ran for the kitchen to fetch Damian.
Joker threw Bruce at Artemis and told them to hurry up. Bruce looked at the back of the Jokers head then over at Harley. She bounced up ahead to stand next to the Joker. He shoved her to the side roughly but she didn't seem to care much. Artemis just shook her head.
"Artemis," whispered Bruce, "where are we going?"
"Back to the hide out," she whispered back, "don't worry, we will get out of here, the Joker won't even realize we are gone."
"Are you sure?"
"Brucy, if I want to get somewhere, no one stops me from going. Not even the Joker." Bruce had a slight smile on his face. He felt a little bad that he was going to have her locked up as well but hopefully she would come out of Gotham normal.
Artemis smile to herself. Everything was going according to her favor. Ha! No wonder the Joker did it, this was exciting, she was having the time of her life fucking with the situation. Every move she made, ever decision she made, manipulated and changed the outcome in her power. The power of the mind alone almost terrified her but at the same time she was lured to play with every situation to see where it would lead her next. Now to let him go or let the Joker do his thing?
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Next time: the question will be answered
