GUILT

~The saint within the sinner~

A strong autumn wind blew nipping at his nose and cheeks. He grinned and snuggled his chin into the collar of his black overcoat. It was a fine evening and at the moment he was glad to be back at the Sohma home. There was nothing wrong with taking a little break from babysitting. Not that he did much for the younger people who stayed in his house, on the contrary it was more like they took care of him, but it was still a slight reprieve from Kyo's loud shouts and the sound of something crashing or breaking. It was a miracle that the house was still standing after all the damage those kids had done. Oh well no matter, he did not have to pay for it and boys will be boys after all. He chuckled to himself before resuming a straight face and softly padding across the wooden porch. Maybe he could visit Haa-san after speaking with Akito first of course.

He was pleasantly relieved to find that she was alone in her room, probably having sent Kureno off to do something. He did not close the door behind him there was no need. A faint chill swept into the room or maybe it had always been this cold. She stood still like a heron in a marsh, only it seemed as if it's feet were trapped beneath the shadowy waters and the picture became something much more sinister. He looked away and focused instead on the chest of drawers with an empty vase sitting on top. There must be thousands of vases in this house, he thought. His musings were interrupted when Akito finally spoke. He could tell she was glaring at him, he could feel her heated gaze burning over his profile, but he didn't give her the satisfaction of noticing her ire. First she had asked in a scornful tone if he missed her, he didn't respond. Then she changed tactics and demanded to know about Yuki and about everything that went on in his house. Shigure was only too happy to oblige. He left nothing out, he spoke of how Yuki was doing in school, of how Kyo had nearly destroyed the house, and lastly how they were all getting along splendidly with their other guest. She laughed, at least he thought it was a laugh, when he mentioned that Tohru was cooking and cleaning and being the perfect little maid. Akito shook her hair from her eyes and smiled, a small wicked smile. So that's all she was really, a servant, that's all someone like her could ever be, someone like that with no background had no future. Shigure shifted and stood up looking down upon her coolly. I wouldn't go so far as to say that Akito, he softly admonished. Suddenly she reached out and grabbed his chin in her fingers, staring deeply into his eyes. Did he detect a hint of jealousy? He gave her his own smile. She threw his head to the side in disgust breathing heavily through her nose. I think it's about time I met this Tohru Honda, she growled. Shigure nodded in agreement.

In the darker hours of the night, he left her and casually meandered down the familiar halls reacquainting himself with the place. He walked past a closed door and decided not to look in, that was Yuki's special room, the room that Akito used to bring him into to be beaten. He unconsciously began to walk faster towards Hatori's office. He could feel his emotions swirling inside wanting to get out somehow but he reined them in, he had learned from the best how to control himself. That's why he needed to see Hatori right now.

When he finally did find him, he realized he had nothing he wanted to say aloud. So he let Hatori fix him a cup of tea and they sat in companionable silence. After a while he asked Hatori if they could sleep together, causing him to choke on his cigarette. He patted him on the back laughing heartily; He hadn't meant it like that. How could he betray Aya so? He lamented with teary eyes. Hatori glowered at him. You and Akito both are detrimental to my health, he said with gravity. That quieted Shigure at once.


AUTHOR'S NOTE: This whole thing has been kind of like an experiment for me. Thanks for reading!!!