Title: 2,000 Miles

Summary: Two thousand miles and more ghosts than that to haunt them.

Pairing: EdwardxWinry.

Spoilers: Post series, so yeah. A little bit of an alternate ending. No movie though. Doesn't even exist.

Rating: PG - NC-17 This chapter: PG-13

FMA does not belong to me and I make no profit from any of these tales. Any further archiving of my fiction is strictly prohibited unless cleared by me.

5. The Science of Definition

It will take a long time to get to Dublith from East City, Winry is certain. She's not sure of the exact route they should take, but they've been heading in a general southwest direction since they left East City earlier that day. She thinks they will be fine, so long as they pick up a map in the next town. The only problem is that it is already getting dark out and there hadn't been any signs of civilization for a few hours.

Beside her, she can see that Ed is trying to sleep; head leaning back against the bench seat in a way that she is sure will hurt in the morning. His mouth is open and he is snoring lightly. Smiling fondly at him, Winry doesn't see the large pot hole in the road ahead. The car rocks as she drives over it, causing Ed's head to bounce and jar him from his light sleep.

He blinks and stares dopily at his surroundings, seemingly unperturbed by the bump to his head. "Where are we?"

"Don't know," She answers, "But why don't you climb in the back and try to get more sleep."

He rubs at his eyes, "What about you?"

"I think I'll drive for a while longer and see if I can find a town."

"And if you can't?"

She shrugs, "I'll just pull over and sleep in the front seat."

Ed agrees and turns around to climb in the back seat. They had thrown their belongings in haphazardly when they left East City and Ed has to spend a few minutes organizing the luggage area behind the back seat so he can transfer them there. It takes a bit of work with all of the tools Winry packed, but eventually he is able to clear enough space for their two suitcases.

There is the sound of hands clapping and a bright blue light illuminates the car's dark interior. Winry's eyes are drawn to the rearview mirror. She sees Ed, a look of sleepy inspiration on his face, kneeling on the bench seat behind her, his suitcase thrown open on the seat in front of him. She watches him warily as he switches his suitcase for hers and transmutes again.

The suitcases make their way to the boot of the car and a rectangular object is set on the seat beside her. One hand leaves the wheel as she grabs at it, her hand contacting with soft cloth. It's a blanket, an especially multicolored one, and as she pulls at a corner, she can make out the shapes and colors of her clothes hastily bound together.

"Ed! These are my clothes!" She yells to her passenger, who had already laid down, a blanket of similar design covering his body.

"I can fix it, don't worry." He mumbles, "You'll need it if we sleep in here tonight. It'll get cold, trust me."

He has a point, and as annoyed as she is, she can't argue with his concern.


Ed finds it hard to get back to sleep again and he lays there until Winry finally gets tired of driving and pulls over along the road. There is the sound of rustling clothes and squeaking leather seats as she settles herself in the front seat.

Outside, crickets and cicadas chirp and a gentle breeze blows through the surrounding foliage. It is a break from the euphony of the sputtering engine and ping of rocks hitting the side of the car as tires tear through dirt roads. It is a new kind of silence and it is deafening.

"Ed? Are you still awake?" Winry whispers.

He clears his throat, "Yeah," he says quietly. The night is too calm and he doesn't want to disturb it.

"I don't suppose there is anything left we can make pillows with, huh?" She seems to think on the same lines, and her voice is quiet in reverence to the night.

"No. I told you to pack light, remember?" He doesn't intend for it to be a joke but she sniggers anyway.

They both listen to the insect song outside their car. In the distance, an owl is heard.

"This is kind of nice isn't it?" She says.

"Yeah." He closes his eyes and just listens.

"Did you used to do this often, when…you know?"

"A few times. Never in a car though." Ed notices that she doesn't mention Al by name or the time they spent traveling. His eyes open. "You know…" he begins, unsure of what he is about to say.

"What?"

He thinks a bit, trying to capture the thought that had previously run through his mind and for a moment demanded to come out. "You don't have to avoid saying his name."

The sound of creaky leather accompanies the appearance of her face over the back of the seat. "You do."

Ed wasn't ready to be confronted with the truth of his own idiosyncrasies. "It's not intentional." He concedes. i 'Unlike you.' /i He doesn't say it, but they both seem to know its there.

She looks down for a moment, hands tracing along the seat. "I guess I do it because I think it upsets you."

"It doesn't. It happened. It's not like I don't know it happened if you don't say his name. It's not like i one /i syllable is going to make me suddenly realize that he's gone." He says this all rather gruffly and by the end, he is berating himself for being so harsh with someone whose only fallibility is that they care about him.

Before he can apologize she is speaking again.

"That's not what I think." Her even voice is quietly serious and slightly accusing. "I just don't want to scrub at a wound I know is still fresh. It's only been a couple months and you gave me no indication that you were ready to talk about him. You don't talk about him and the first time you did, back in East City, it tore you apart."

"That's not…" He starts out harshly, takes a deep, calming breath before starting again. Softly this time, remembering his earlier guilt, "I was upset because I let myself forget. For a moment, I forgot that he was gone. And when I finally remembered…It was like losing him all over again."

The back of his eyes start to feel prickly and he throws an arm over them, hoping that will be enough of a shield from her gaze. It makes him want to open up in a way that he doesn't feel ready enough for. Not yet. A damn is about to burst inside of him, one he wants to hold up for a while longer.

She wants to say something else, he knows - can practically feel it in the air. "Can we… just go to sleep now?"

"…Okay." He must have sounded desperate, because the next sound he hears is her lying back down on the front seat. "Goodnight Ed."


Winry wakes up earlier than she would have if she'd slept in a hotel. She throws the blanket off and regrets the hasty action as goose bumps break out across her skin. She pulls the blanket back over her, grateful that Ed is so thoughtful. Speaking of her passenger, she looks in the back seat and notices that he's not there.

She uncovers slowly this time, letting herself adjust to the cold. Pushing the door open, she gets out of the car and stretches, feeling her muscles pull and her bones pop. The air has a definite bite to it and she rubs her arms for warmth. The sky is cloudy, and she wonders if it will finally rain.

The bushes to her left rustle and Ed emerges from the forest.

"Where were you?" She asks when he draws closer.

"Bathroom."

She takes a few more minutes to stretch before climbing in the car. Ed is already seated next to her and an idea suddenly strikes. Turning towards him, she asks, "Hey Ed, what to learn how to drive?"


Winry explains things in too much detail, making the lesson longer than Ed would have liked. With each step they come to, Winry goes off on a tangent about the inner mechanical workings of her pride and joy. Furthermore, she had decided that the easiest way to teach him how to drive was to show him, which apparently required her to sit closer to him than he was used to. She kept a hand on top of his right hand, their fingers both gripping the shifting knob as she showed him how to maneuver through the gears. Her other hand rested on his knee and she used slight pressure to signal him whenever he had to release the clutch, brake, or push on the gas petal.

Now, Ed has known for a while that Winry is a girl, but every time he pops the clutch and they are jolted hard into each other, he is reminded of how much of a woman she has become. She hasn't showered since the day before, and he can smell her perspiration - strangely feminine and pleasant. It is seriously damaging his learning capabilities.

She asks why his face is so red. Smoothly, he tells her that he is getting hot and she graciously slides further to the passenger side. That takes care of one problem.

Unfortunately, it doesn't interfere with her ability to give extended lectures. In fact, it gives her a better position to observe his irritated looks and she winds up yelling at him for not paying attention. Ed's jaw is starting to become sore from clenching his back teeth together. With a frustrated sigh, he tells himself that at least the new pain is distracting him from his sore back. A result, no doubt, of sleeping curled up in the back seat.

"Winry, can you just let me try on my own, please?" He interrupts her speech – something to do with pistons – and she turns back around with a huff, arms going akimbo. Sighing in relief, Ed gathers up the few basic facts that he did learn, turns the key, and gently shifts through the gears. Next to him, Winry looks surprised and a little put out. Warily, she watches him as he maneuvers the car down the road.

For the next few miles her gaze is like a hawk and Ed finds his nerves wearing thin. It's not like the road is busy. They'd been traveling on it for almost two days now and seen enough cars to count on one set of hands. They'd even traveled past the forest, so there weren't any trees close to the road for him to hit. She is just being over protective, and he, in his flustered and already aggravated state, has little tolerance left.

"I think I see a town." He announces, and sure enough, far in the distance, shapes too regular and straight to be natural come into view.

They arrive in minutes and a sign at the entrance of town proclaims it as Hatton's Bend. The town is not as large as East City, not even close, but it is about three times the size of Gatewood. Most of the houses are white or tan stucco with red or brown clay roofs. Stores litter several side streets and a main drag lies in the center of town with several outlying roads and neighborhoods.

There is more traffic here and Winry tensely tells him to pull over in an abandoned parking lot since they haven't covered parking yet.

"What do you want to do now?" He asks, getting out of the car.

"I guess, get a room for a couple of hours."

The last time Ed had heard anyone suggest that was when Mustang had offered to arrange a way for him to get rid of his virginity problem. One and one make two and Ed finds himself having trouble reconciling the sum with his preconceived image of Winry.

They grab their bags and lock up the car. Ed follows her as she leads them along to the nearest hotel and asks for a day rate. He has trouble meeting the eyes of the clerk, fully aware of what it appears like they are about to do. Winry doesn't seem to notice, and if she does, she doesn't show that she cares.

The room is not much different than the millions he has seen in his days; two double beds, a desk, and an attached bathroom.

"You can use the bathroom first." He offers, "I'll go get us something to eat." She agrees and he can't get out the door fast enough.

Next-door is a restaurant. He orders two breakfasts 'to go' and sits at a table to wait. Resting his elbows on the surface of the table, he presses the heels of his hands to his eyes and wonders what is wrong with him.

It had been ages since he'd felt…that, for anybody, he'd honestly forgotten how to cope with it. The fact that he is lusting for Winry makes it all the worse.

He and Al never talked about it much, but his relationship with Winry is…was strikingly different than Al's. For as long as he could remember, there had always been this…thing between them. It was like a steel rod forged between them, keeping her slightly at a distance and preventing him from defining her in any specific way. Al was his best friend and anything he'd ever learned about siblings prevented him from thinking of her like a sister. He used to, but on the day her parents died, that title began to fade away. If he was really any kind of brother to her, he would have grieved as much as she did.

That's probably when it all started. After her parents died, Winry changed. Sometimes, she would get these longing looks on her face when she saw him, Al, and his mother together. She started spending more time with her Granny. Come to think of it, that's when she first began studying auto-mail, a prophetic pastime that would come in handy several years later.

Then, she had become his auto-mail mechanic, a title that had fit them well. The only time it ever gave him problems was when she would get personal, worry, and cry on his behalf, which happened more times than Ed could count. It was probably this behavior that convinced so many people for so long that she was his girlfriend. Then he'd just scream at them and say that she was just his mechanic, grateful for such a convenient title.

It's wasn't like he'd never thought about it. In the short time after he and Al were restored, when everything was perfect, he'd thought about it more seriously than he ever had.

In the next year he spent most of his time adjusting to having an arm and leg again. There was no rush then, so he took his time. Sometimes, he attempted to sort out his true feelings for Winry, but again felt unhurried. Then one day, Al had collapsed, just as his mother had. The déjà vu sent him reeling and the next several months all he thought about was his brother's health.

It seems that his path in life is to constantly push Winry aside.

But now…Winry is all he really has. The implications of that make his chest ache.

Al is gone. What would become of him now? Could he now re-make his path to put her first? Was it fair after being so selfish for so long? Would she even want a relationship? Did he?

Would he have sought to define her this way if Al was still here? Would it have worked if Al was still here? How could he enter into a relationship with her if it wouldn't have worked if his brother hadn't…passed on?

What if it didn't work out? What if he ruined it all, like he was apt to do? Would she hate him and leave him too? Would they continue to be just friends? Could they? Most importantly, why was he thinking of this now, after so long?

He has a million questions and only one truth. His body is waking up. In other men, it would be cause for celebration, but Edward Elric is not other men. To him, it is just another problem on a pile of too many others.


Ed is not back when she steps out of the shower, so she takes a little extra time to get cleaned up. She twists up her hair in a style reminiscent of Riza Hawkeye and banishes her comfy jeans and one-piece work clothes to the bottom of her suitcase, pulling out her much preferred shorts and tank-tops. She'd left most of her beautiful skirts at home. They were a pain to drive in. Briefly, she wonders if she can get Ed to freshen their clothes with alchemy. She thinks it's possible and it will take less time.

After she is dressed, she finds a pad of paper on the desk and, sitting on the bed, begins to make a list of supplies they may need. Gas was first on the list, followed by soap, a map, toothpaste, and possibly some snacks for the road.

Winry is pondering if anything she needs is available at the local hardware store when Ed gets back. He gives her a funny look and she asks why.

"Your hair looks different." He states, strolling into the room, examining her out of the corner of his eye the whole time.

Her fingers reach up to play with the clip in her hair, "Do you like it? I felt like a change and I always liked Riza's hair. Mine's a bit different though."

Ed doesn't say anything, but a second later, food is sat down in front of her. He sits with his back to her at the desk. They eat in silence for a while, and Winry is shocked at how uneasy it feels. Since Al, she has grown accustomed to long silences in Ed's company.

"I was thinking that we should get some supplies while we're here." She ventures an attempt at conversation.

"What kind of supplies?"

"Well, we should defiantly take the car and get gas. I'd like to give it a tune up but that could take a while so I suppose it can wait for now…I'd like to get a map. Come to think of it, it was pretty stupid of us to leave without one."

"I suppose. Why don't you go and do that. I'll shower and get anything else you want."

Winry watches his back for a moment, as if it will lend any answers to his strange behavior. All day, his behavior has just been…off. It was very subtle, but Winry could tell. He'd been polite to the point of being unnatural. He'd said please and been extremely gentlemanly all day. He'd even almost complemented her on her hair, something Ed never did. And now his suggestion to split their errands in half…

Why did it feel like he was suddenly trying to avoid her? With all the time they'd been spending together recently, was she finally starting to get on his nerves? Did she do or say something wrong?

Last night, his voice had sounded so thick and desperate for her to just leave him alone. Maybe that could have been it.

Of course, it could be that she was imagining it all and he simply wanted to get back on the road faster. And even if he did want a little time to himself, there was nothing wrong with that.

Making up her emotions, Winry pastes on a big smile and says, "Okay. I'll make you a list."


The water is hot and Ed is thankful that Winry has already left. When he walked in, he thought he had the wrong room. It was amazing what a simple hairstyle could do to make a person look older. Not to mention the fact that when he'd walked in she'd been sitting with one leg curled under her, the other stretched out casually to the side in a way that highlighted just how shapely her legs were…

He shakes his head to rid himself of the image. He i really /i should not be thinking about this with the hot water sluicing along his skin.

He quickly finishes up, steps out of the shower, and puts on a fresh set of clothes. He brushes his hair into a ponytail and heads out to the main room.

The first thing on his to-do list is pseudo-laundry as Al likes to call it…liked to call it.

He claps his hands together, manipulates the molecules, and their clothes become fresh and mostly clean. It's no replacement for the real thing, but it'll do for now. Next on the list are a few groceries, so he grabs the cash Winry left for him and steps out of the hotel room.


Hatton's Bend sure has a lot of nice stores, Winry thinks. Each one painted in dulling shades of green, yellow, and red with big windows out front displaying merchandise. After filling up on gas and grabbing a map, she decided that she deserved a little shopping break, so she went to the hardware store. She browsed so long the store owner got angry and kicked her out. It wasn't her fault the only money she had was Edward's and it'd be pointless to buy him a part for auto-mail he no longer has.

A few pastry shops later, she finds herself sticky-fingered and browsing the local bookstore. She doesn't know a thing about alchemy so she just skips that section altogether. She finds a new auto-mail journal and purchases it, a little disappointed that she didn't have any ideas on anything for Ed.

Ready to leave, a display at the entrance catches her eye.

Perfect.


The dampness of his ponytail seeps through his white shirt, sending chills down his back as he stands in front of a General store clutching a paper sack in one arm. His boots echo loudly on the sturdy wooden porch out front and he surveys the town. Buildings were packed so close there was no room for alleyways. Beyond, he can see tree tops and looking down the dirt road leading straight out of town he sees nothing but more fields. With all this land they could have spaced the town out more and he briefly wonders who did their city planning.

Horse drawn carriages loaded with grain pass by as he steps down and begins to canvas the shops, wondering if he can find his driver. A few vendors barter their goods along the road and for a moment he is caught up in the familiar feeling of the market.

Alphonse never really liked the market; too many people to stare at him. Ed loved it though and often times would wander about in it when he needed to think. Alphonse often asked him why he always went to the market and never bought anything. It was easy to pretend, just for a moment, that Al was just waiting back at the hotel for his brother to come home empty handed.

Truth slapped him in the face and Edward put down the apple he had picked up. The reminiscent smile that had for a second graced his face slowly melts. Al was not at the hotel. Al would never be waiting back at the hotel. Al would never again know the joy of everyday life that came from a trip to the market.

"I thought that was you."

Turning around to Winry, he doesn't say anything but he can tell she knows something is wrong. The cheer in her voice wavers on her face.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

Meeting her eyes, he tries to make himself look less desolate without being suspicious and tells her that everything is alright. It is difficult to keep his voice from cracking.

"Oh, good." The cheerful mood returns. "Hey I bought you something."

A brown wrapped package that was clearly a book is thrust in his face. He takes it, surprised. "I didn't think you had any money."

"Don't worry about it. Just open it would you."

Ed eyes her suspiciously, and gets the feeling he just bought himself a present.

The paper tears easily and he turns the book over in his hands searching for a title. It has none. Opening the pages, he finds them blank as well. He snaps the book shut. "I don't need another research journal."

Winry doesn't flinch at his protest, "No silly! Not all journals are for research you know." She lectures.

"…So what am I supposed to write in it?"

"Whatever you want. That's the beauty of a journal. You can write down what you're feeling from day to day."

Edward stares at her. What had gotten into her to make her think he'd keep a diary? He wasn't the type of person who liked to talk about his feelings let alone write them down. She should know that. The fact that she didn't makes his heart sink and instead of calling her on it he just mumbles a thanks and tucks it into his jacket pocket.

Her face falls a bit but Edward can't dredge up the will to care about the fact that she was hurt by his lack of enthusiasm for her gift.

She sighs, "I could really use some caffeine. Hey, let's get some coffee before we leave, okay?" She offers.

He follows her to a restaurant with an outdoor café. Winry wants to sit outside, but one look at the overcast sky and Ed suggests that they better go inside. They find a booth and sit across from each other, laying their respective bags on the seat next to them. He sets the journal on the table top, contemplates it for a moment, and picks it back up. Winry pulls out a journal with an auto-mail arm on the cover and immerses herself in it.

Listlessly, he turns page after blank page in the journal. It is a deep burgundy hard-cover with creamy white pages. They feel dry and heavy to his fingers, and he is impressed by the understated quality. These kinds of pages would soak up ink quickly, preventing smearing if the writer were ever on a roll. He can clearly picture the ink seeping into the thirsty page. Really, it would have made a fantastic research journal. If only he had anything left to research...

With a sigh he puts down the journal. Maybe it wasn't such a useless present after all. He had always found that even after the greatest upheavals, life continued on. Routines were adjusted and the days kept on passing. Perhaps one day he'd find something to fill it with.

Across from him, Winry folds the magazine in half and leans eagerly over the page. A small piece of hair brushes across her face and she mechanically tucks it behind her ear, her intensity not disrupted at the least. He smiles, in some ways he and Winry were too alike.

He wonders if in another life, that similarity would have counted for something more meaningful between the two of them. In that moment, a thought perches on the edge of his brain. Never one to let a stray thought escape, he searches his mind for a thread to grasp that will lead him to it.

He looks at Winry again and sees a path not taken. What would have happened if he and Al had learned their lesson from Sensei? They'd never have been disfigured, never have joined the military, and Al would have still died. At least, the way things played out, Ed had gotten more time with his brother.

The other option had its appeal too. For one, Ed is sure that if he'd never met Maes Hughes, he'd still be alive. Then, would Winry's definition still be unclear? If he and Al had never decided to bring their mother back, their secrets would have never festered and beget the gap between the two brothers and she. Then what? Granny had certainly offered to let them live with her. The only reason they had refused was so they could study human transmutation in private. But what if they had accepted? Would the label of sister fit Winry then? When Al got his body back it was that of a ten year old. It hadn't aged a day in the gate, so the disease didn't have time to incubate. In the unblemished alternate reality of his life, he would have been thirteen when Al died at age twelve. In Resembool, at that age he could have ventured forward on his own.

The possibilities are endless and each one soars through his head with terrible speed.

For a second, he longs for a pen.


Okay, this one was a bit difficult to write because I'm really gonna get into the ed/Winry thing from here on out. I'm trying to make is seem natural and healthy, which is the hard part. For those of you who haven't noticed the rating warning yet, this story will eventually be NC-17. I'm sorry if any of you have a problem with this but I do have my reasons. For one, in this story, Ed and Winry are adults and sex is a natural and perfectly healthy part of life. For Ed it'll be really healthy. They say that severely depressed people lose their sexual drive. I have experienced this first hand. When it wears off, well, all I can say is that it's intense. So if Ed starts seeming a little too affected by certain things, well, I'm just drawing from my personal experiences. Plus let's not forget that he's an 18 year old male, it's probably worse then.

Now, I was thinking of not going all the way up to NC-17 for the people that are following this story from the beginning because it had a G rating, but in the end I came to a compromise. The NC-17 part will only be found on my livejournal while the clean one will be up on But, the NC-17 part won't be for a while yet. When it gets here I'll be sure to give you guys warning in the previous chapter.

As always, reviews and constructive criticism are very welcome.

PS: Sorry it took so long to announce this. I blame it on Naruto totally owning my soul right now. I can't help it. I just want to take all of team seven, put them on a shelf next to the elric brothers and keep them safe for the rest of their lives.