Thank you too lotusblossom, maxandmo and hubby for all the encouragement. Without the three of you, this would not be written.

I know you all wondering why I rated this story 'M'. Well, you are about to find out. There are some lemons contained within this chapter. Please review and let me know what you think. I have no outline; I am coming up with each chapter as I write. This story could lead anywhere, depending on reviews. For those of you that have reviewed, Thank You, it means a lot to me!!

*All the characters belong to Stephanie Meyer.*

~Chapter 2-That's Mrs. Swan-Black to you!!~

~Bella~

I was able to locate Carlisle very quickly considering the chaos going on in the hospital with all the aftershocks. I was nervous but mildly relieved to know I was soon going to be able leave this destruction and no longer feel the crushing guilt. Guilt for not doing what I swore to do, to take care of the patients, guilt for being ALIVE! My family deserved to be here not me. My children should still be on this earth. I would have given my life for theirs. The inner turmoil was consuming me. I needed not to be here. If I was to stay my mind would be imprisoned in this place of devastation. What good would I be to anyone in that condition? I needed to be strong and be in a place where I can take care of my family. If I was to go stay in Forks with Esme I could clear my mind and begin the preparations for their memorial. I felt in my heart that this was all so quick and sudden, but I did not see any other way. I think I am in denial. God, just let me get to this new place.

"Carlisle, I have decided to take you up on your offer. I am not sure when you can make it happen, but, I would like to get out of here as soon as possible. But, I think I am going to have a problem, my passport was in my purse. I don't think I will have access to my purse anytime soon."

"I spoke with the people clearing up some of the debris in the area where the dialysis clinic was. They found a lot personal belongings and put them on the table over there. Please go and check out the area and see if your purse is there." He pointed to a table with several purses and wallets on it and a few toys. Seeing the toys made me think about my children again. They will never play with a toy again. I won't be able to celebrate anymore of their birthdays. August was the best month of the year. That was the month both of my beautiful children were born. Leah was born on the 8th and Seth was born on the 22nd. How could you ask for a better month to celebrate the best gifts I will ever receive?

I was able to locate my purse. It was a little dirty but otherwise it was completely intact.

24 hours later:

I was on the plane waiting for the approach into the Seattle Airport. I was feeling so many different emotions; guilt, fear and most of all extreme sadness. How could I have just left my family? I know Carlisle said he would take care of them and get them sent to me here, but I still felt this pull. Now I don't know if I should have left, am I a selfish person for leaving? Did I make the decision to leave to fast? Oh god, please help me. Now anguish is what I felt. How was I going to start over? I now have nothing. My family is gone and the world I have been living in for the last 7 years is gone. As my mind was racing through all of these thoughts and emotions I began to hyperventilate. I could not catch my breath and things started to get blurry. What is wrong with me? Was I injured worse then they originally thought? Did they miss something wrong with me back in Haiti? Was this and anxiety attack? It had been a couple of minutes feeling this way and it was not getting any better. The flight attendant came over to me to ask if I needed any help. I was unable to answer her. Things got really blurry at that point and I think I passed out because when I woke up I was not in the plane. I was in my bedroom back at the apartment. Jacob was with me and we were passionately kissing. Our tongues were moving in sync with one another, as if they were dancing. Then he began to lift off my scrub top and fondle my breasts. My nipples immediately reacted to his touch, as they usually did. While this was going on I reached down in his pants and pulled out his very erect penis. As I was stroking it up and down he began to moan, "You are all I ever need, I love you more than life itself."

I began to whisper back to him, "Jacob, I need to feel you inside me now, I want to be a part of you."

With that last statement he quickly went to ripping off my bottom scrubs and panties. I likewise ripped his clothing off as fast as possible. He thrust his cock in me so hard; I let out a small scream. He could be forceful and sexy at times. We made love for a half hour and fell asleep in each other arms. For some reason this episode seemed oddly familiar, like it has happened before.

I woke up once again I saw a curtain and side rails to a hospital bed. Where was I? I looked for a call button because at this point I realized I was in a hospital, which hospital I did not know. I pushed it and had an immediate response from a nurse.

"Yes, can I help you?"

"I hope so, my name is Bell Swan-Black, I just woke up and I do not know where I am? Can you help me?" I spoke anxiously.

"Someone will be right in."

That is when it happened. The most gorgeous man I have ever seen walked in from behind the privacy curtain. I immediately felt as if there was a warmness moving throughout my entire body, was I having another episode?

"Hello, Mrs. Swan-Black, I am Dr. Masen. You are at Northwest Hospital in Seattle, Washington. Can you tell me what day it is?" He asked this question trying to evaluate my level of concisenesses.

"I think it is January 14th. Please tell me I am correct." I asked unsure of my answer. I did not know how long I had been out.

"That is correct, mam. You gave us quite a scare. I believe the injuries you suffered during the earthquake were a little more severe than they thought. You had some swelling in the brain, but we were able to resolve it with a minimal amount of Mannitol."

"How do you know I was involved in the earthquake? Oh, and please call me Bella, mam, makes me feel old." I think I am flirting. What am I doing? This needs to stop now.

"The women that accompanied the ambulance let us know your history."

"Who accompanied the ambulance, the last thing I remember was being on the plane, about 20 minutes from landing?" I was starting to get worked up again.

"Bella, just calm down, it was Esme Cullen. She was at the airport waiting for your arrival." As he spoke he began to approach me. He placed his hand on my shoulder in such a gentle manor, yet when there was contact I felt a shock. I jumped slightly, as did he. I know he felt it to. What is wrong with me? Why do I keep having these odd sensations? "I need to do a small assessment. Can you sit up and lean forward for me please?"

He listened to my lungs and heart, examined my eyes and asked me a few more questions about my head injury. His beeper soon went off and he apologized, said he had to take the page and left the room.

After he left I felt strange. I felt like a part of me that I did not know about left with him. I just didn't know how to feel anymore. I have had so much happen within the last 48 hours, my mind was spinning. A nurse came in shortly after Dr. Masen left. She let me know I needed to stay the next 24 hours for observation and then I would be discharged. She also let me know I had some pain killers and antidepressants ordered PRN (as necessary).

"May I have some Percocet for the pain?" I figured if I took something I could sleep for the next few hours and not have to think about all the loss in my life. Once again I was trying to avoid thinking about everything that has happened to me.

I did not wake up until the next morning. When I awoke I noticed Esme sitting in the chair at the end of my bed reading a magazine. She looked so sweet and mature. She exuded such a maternal feeling. I have not seen that in anyone since my mother, Renee. I lost her several years ago to renal failure. She was a juvenile diabetic and became a very brittle diabetic after she had me. She wanted a child so badly she didn't care what she knew would happen to her if she tried to conceive and deliver a child. She was receiving dialysis for several years and waited the last three years of her life for a kidney transplant. It never came. She passed away 1 month after my wedding. I think she held on long enough to see her only child get married to a wonderful person. She wanted to see me happy and secure. When I married Jacob she knew I would be taken care of, she thought he was a generous and compassionate man. I was happy to have her at my wedding; it meant a lot to me that she along with my father could walk me down the aisle. I am saddened when I think of her because she never got to know her beautiful grandchildren. She would have spoiled them rotten. I named Leah Renee after her. But, because of everything I went through with her and her renal failure I knew what I wanted to be, a nurse. I wanted to take care of other mothers and grandmothers and make a difference. I hope I have. My mother would have wanted it that way.

"Oh, sweetheart, you're awake. How are you feeling? Do you need anything? I was very worried about you; I called Carlisle to let him know what happened on the plane. He said he will be here next week to see you." As she spoke I felt a sense of calm come over me. I finally felt safe.

"No, thank you Esme. Thank you for everything you did for me at the airport and I apologize for the scare. I didn't realize I was injured that badly. If I did I probably would not have flown this soon. Have you spoken with the doctors or nurses, do you have any idea when I am going to be discharged?"

"The doctor on call came by an hour ago and did not want to disturb you. He said he would be back when you awoke. He has to do one last assessment and then he will sign the discharge papers. "

"Great, I am eager to get out of here so you can go home, I am sorry I have kept you in Seattle for two days unnecessarily."

"Oh, don't be silly sweetheart; it is only a two hour drive. I drove back up here this morning. I will let the nurses know that you have woken up so you can get your breakfast and the doctor can come. I will be right back. Would you like me to get you a good cup of coffee while I am out there?"

"Sure, that would be great, thank you again!!!" She walked out and I took a deep breath. I was still in shock about everything. I must look horrendous. I tried to pull the bedside table over but the wheels were locked, so I decided to get up and go into the bathroom, I had to go potty anyway. I sat at the side of the bed way to fast because I almost passed out again. When I was finally able to get up I walked slowly with my IV pole in hand to the bathroom. I walked in and I was shocked. I had large black circles under each eye, my hair was standing straight up as if I had a mohawk and my face seemed slightly swollen. I attempted to comb through my hair with my fingers but it was a lost cause. I brushed my teeth with my finger and some water, which really didn't help my breath much, but oh well. I knew the coffee that Esme was bringing would solve the breath issue. I did not have any make-up of course, so there was nothing to do about the eyes. I went potty and headed back to the room. As I walked out of the bathroom a man was standing there in a long white coat.

"Hello, Miss. Swan, I am Dr. Newton. Let's get you checked out so you can go home." The way he was looking at me as he spoke was making me feel dirty. Was he eye-fucking me?

"It's Mrs. Swan-Black." I stated irritated. Look at my chart you dumb fuck, I am a married woman.

"Sorry, my mistake." He responded with annoyance. He did the same thing Dr. Masen did yesterday. He asked me the date, who the president was, if I remembered what happened to me to bring me here. He also checked my heart, lungs and eyes. I wonder if was able to hear a heartbeat, because I think my heart died with the rest of my family. My chest felt empty. It was like there was a black hole where my heart used to be. "I think you are ready to go. I do need for you to have a check up in a couple days and a follow-up CAT scan. Also, I have referred you to a psychologist to deal with the depression."

To deal with the depression, what in the hell is he talking about. Who diagnosed me with depression? I wanted to tell that asshole that I had just lost my husband of 7 years and my two young children. Of course I am going to be a little sad, but depressed, he can get bent!!!!

"OK, Dr. I will do that." I said this a little snippy.

"Goodbye then Mrs. Swan-Black, I will send the nurse in to give you your discharge instructions." The way he said my name was so condescending. He waved and walked out. Thank God, he rubbed me the wrong way. He wasn't as nice as the doctor I saw yesterday.

Esme returned shortly after with bath in a bag and some McDonald's for breakfast. Wow, she was amazing. After I got cleaned up and ate the nurse gave me the discharge instructions and Esme and I left. I of course left by wheelchair because it is hospital policy.

A Mercedes pulled up and Esme got out of the driver's seat to help me into the car. Once we were making our two hour drive back to Forks she began to ask me if I wanted to talk about anything. She said if I didn't want to it was ok. She was so understanding and patient. I think I made a good decision coming to stay here with her. I have to remember to thank Dr. Cullen for his brilliant idea. Esme treated me as her own and I felt as if I could share anything with her and she would help me through it. I wanted to open up to her but I was exhausted. I asked her if it was ok if I just slept for a while.

"Yes, dear that is perfectly ok. You need plenty of rest; please do not stay awake on my account."

So I slept the entire way back to the Cullen mansion. It took me a minute to try and think of the reason I was so tired. And then it came to me, a head injury, duh!!! I better see if there was any permanent damage to my head, I am not thinking clearly….