Bruised Egos

Chapter: 3

Pairing: Robert and Holly

Rating: Strong R

Robert's hands slid away from her and all contact was broken. He reached for the bottle of scotch that he had place on the edge of the dresser earlier. His fingers sliding around the thin neck of the bottle. He took a sloppy, long, calming drink. He couldn't do it, he couldn't put a spark of hope into her dark eyes or into his cynical mind. No. Things had already went incredibly too far and he refused to let it go any further.

"This isn't going to happen." he said, gesturing over toward the bed. "I can't."

Holly watched as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "You mean you won't." she replied. "You're afraid of what's going to happen afterwards."

"It's a bad idea." he told her. "We're different people now and things aren't going to magically change and become all fairytale like. We'll both turn back into pumpkins at midnight."

"I don't have those expectations." she said, firmly. "I learnt a long time ago that setting the bar too high only concludes with a ton of disappointment. Expect nothing and then when you receive nothing you're not crushed. It's the first rule of survival."

"You are a survivor." he breathed out, taking another drink. "You're so cold and distant and bitter. Is it the art of surviving that's made you like that?"

"You should know." she replied. "You've been playing the same game I have, only longer."

"Mmm." he sighed, sitting the scotch down on the table. "I see. I guess that makes you and me one in the same, right?"

Holly shook her head. "No." she answered. "It makes me almost as pathetic as you are."

Robert reached forward and done something he had never done before. He grabbed her arm, hard, and pulled her to him. "Why are you here?" he asked, looking into her eyes. "Why me of all the partners that you could have had?"

She never flinched. "Why not you?" she asked. "You always proclaimed to be the best. And besides I didn't pick you, Fox paired us up, remember?"

He took a deep breath, inhaling her warm scent. "You need to leave." he said, his body pressing tighter against hers. "You need to walk out of here and forget you ever saw me."

"Sorry, but I can't do that." she replied, never attempting to remove herself from his grasp. "I can't pretend that none of this ever happened."

"I need you to." there was such pleading behind his words, almost a haunting beg. "Please Holly, please, just turn around and walk out the door."

"Why?" she asked. "Why are you so determined to push me away? We're both different people now and we've both had to deal with so much. Maybe I understand a little of what you're going through, maybe I understand what's going on inside of you."

"I don't want to hurt you."

"I don't think you're going to." she replied. "I'm not asking for you to give me the moon, Robert, I'm just asking you to allow me to relieve some of this grief that you're feeling. That we're both feeling."

"I couldn't give you the moon." he said, softly. "Not even back then."

"It's not about then, it's about now." she told him. "I think we both need this. I don't think we're going to be able to live with ourselves if we don't."

"I don't know where to start." he confessed. "I don't want to hurt you."

"I know." she said. "And it's okay, I'll lead the way."

Holly pressed a kiss to the side of his neck, inhaling deeply as she did so. The very scent of him was enough to drive her mad. Her mouth was so warm against him. He was frozen in sensation. Her fingers worked skillfully to undo the buttons of his shirt whilst her mouth continued to caress the side of his neck. Her fingertips brushed through his chest hair and then circled around a nipple causing it to tighten under her delicate touch.

Her mouth opened against his neck, her tongue barely touching the salty flesh. Robert inhaled sharply. So many forgotten sensations were flooding back to him all at once. She continued to tease his nipple with her thumb and then continued moving her hand down his toned body until she reached his lower abs. She stroked the hard muscle beneath her fingers, tracing the toned lines. She placed another kiss against his neck.

"This isn't so bad is it?" she murmured against his skin. She didn't get a verbal response, but she felt him relax more against her. "Hey." she said, looking up at him. "It's okay, Robert, I'm not going to break." She leaned up, her open mouth moving toward his. His lips parted slightly and she took the invitation to kiss him. Her silky tongue slipping past his lips and touching against his was absolute heaven.

Robert couldn't help but kiss her back, but ever so careful not to become overly passionate. Their tongues danced together rather slowly at first and then as time passed the kiss grew more and more heated. Mouths opening wider, nipping of the lips, and then the inevitable loss of air that left them practically panting. But still he wasn't close enough. She wanted him closer. He was holding back and that was the last thing she wanted.

And so she did the only thing she could. She decided to get aggressive. She knew that he wanted her, she could feel it in his kiss, but he couldn't seem to let go. Holly slipped her blouse over her head and tossed it to the floor. Robert's eyes roamed appreciatively. She was incredible sexy and so very curvy. He swallowed, hard. He wanted this, he really wanted this.

"Touch me." her words were warm and soft and inviting.

Robert was still incredibly hesitant. He was burning alive with desire. He could barely breathe for the overwhelming the sensations, but he didn't want to hurt her and he knew that's exactly what he was going to end up doing. And that was the last thing in the world he ever wanted. But damn he wanted her. More than any man had ever wanted any woman in the history of the world.

"Holly, I..." his words with damn near breathless and a million thoughts were colliding in his head. "I..."

She reached for his hand and placed it over the swell of her lace covered breast.. It was instinctive. His hand squeezed the firm flesh beneath his hand. And she let out an barely audible low moan of absolute pleasure then closed her eyes and drew in a sharp breath at the reactions that he had started to unravel within her.

And he felt it too. His blood pulsed through his veins, running hot enough to scald anything he touched. The stroke of his hands seemed to ignite a fire within her as well. Her skin flushed with desire underneath his skillful touch and she began to ache for more contact, for his body to be closer to hers, to be moving against her. His thumb swept over her hardened nipple, shortly joined by his forefinger as he pinched the sensitive peak.

He placed a kiss against her neck, inhaling the very essence of her. He ran his tongue up to her ear and flicked his tongue over the shell. "Holly." he breathed, hotly. "I want you so bad."

She struggled to breathe. "I'm yours."

Another kiss was pressed against her neck as he removed his unbuttoned shirt from his sweaty body. His hands ran down along the sides of her abdomen, his fingertips lightly caressing. Another kiss on her neck and then he pulled back, slightly, his eyes glaring down at his hands touching her body. She was silky smooth and her entire body was already starting to dampen with sweat in anticipation.

The button to her slacks was carefully undone and he decided to use both hands to remove them completely from her body. Dragging the annoying material down her thighs, sinking to the floor himself with them and then down to her calves until the only pace for them to go was off. She stepped out of her heels and then out of her slacks. Robert, still on his knees before her, ran his hands up her legs. Gently caressing the smooth skin he found there. His fingertips stroked up to her thighs, closely followed behind was the dragging of his warm lips.

Her hands instinctively threaded in his hair. His tongue danced across the top of her thigh and then up to the lace of her panties. His tongue tickled her devilish through the pattern of the lace. And Holly was suffocating at the thought of his mouth moving even further inward. And he did just that. His tongue took a languid stroke over her and she gasped for air.

"Robert." she rasped.

"All in good time." he said, dragging his lips up over the lace. "I have other ideas first."

His lips were touching the area just above the lace of her panties and he was working his way up to her bellybutton dipping inside and swirling about before continuing upward. He placed a kiss on the swell of each breast. He was insane to try and resist her. This is what he had wanted all along, this is what he had needed. Holly. His open mouth dancing around hers before his tongue plunged inside and tangled together with hers.

Her hands started to roam. And with great impatience. Down over his chest and then his abdomen until she came to the waistband of his trousers. She stripped him of his belt and undid his pants all the while his lips kissed and caressed hers. Her hand slid down his pants until her hand was tightly wrapped around his hard, throbbing, arousal. He pushed against her ever so slightly.

"What do you say we skip the rest of this..." she trailed off. "Foreplay and..."

He grabbed her hand and moved it away from him. Then he striped down the rest of the way and spun her around so that her back was flush against him. "I have other ideas."

Robert swept her long, dark, curly hair to the side and touched the tip of his tongue to the back of her neck causing hairs to stand on end. He tortuously licked up until the silkiness of his warm tongue was flat against her flushed flesh. A small whimper escaped her lips followed by a delicate moan. His left hand squeezed her still lace covered breast as his right hand slipped down her abdomen, tracing tiny circles over the concealing lace. His rough hands crackling audibly over the black barriers. A rousing sound.

"We're going to play a little game." he whispered against her ear, his tongue flicking over her earlobe "And it's called let's see how many times Robert can push Holly over the edge."

Holly smiled, confident that he couldn't see her. "That game is a favorite of your's isn't it, darling?"

"I've tried so many times before to tell you how I felt."

"I know I couldn't listen. There were so many things..."

"I love you. I love you in a way that I've never loved any other woman before. And I want to take care of you. And I want to be with you always. And I want you to love me without feeling any guilt or shame."

"You wanted to know why I kissed you when I came back."

"Mmmm."

"I kissed you because I finally realized I have to put the past behind me. I have to get on with my life. I freed myself up on that mountain. I left a big part of my behind but I knew that I had found someone who could give me back what I lost. So I came back to you."

"You really do want me?"

"Yes. Oh yes I want you."

Robert was suddenly frozen. The past that he had been running from, the past that he had been trying to escape, the feelings that he had tried to forget were flooding through him. He couldn't think. He couldn't move.

"I'm sorry." he whispered, letting go of her. "I can't do this."

Holly turned around to face him. "What's the matter?"

He picked his pants up off the floor and began putting them back on. "I'm sorry, Holly." he apologized. "I didn't mean for any of this to happen."

tbc...