Disclaimer: One Piece is owned by a cult of talented manga artists, all in hiding to prevent the outside world tainting their pure thoughts. Together, all of their efforts are published under the pseudonym "Eiichira Oda". I am not one of them T^T

Nami was reading a book, sunbathing on their still-new ship, when Zorro spotted it. Personally, Nami believed she deserved a rest, after trying to experiment with her powers and keep up her navigating demands. That left barely half of the day for relaxing, after all. Fortunately, she had only become soapy once more by accident in the last three days, which suggested it wouldn't happen too often. She had a theory that too much use of her powers created the backlash, which explained the sunbathing and relaxation she was up to right now.

After much experimentation, she had figured out her body had some kind of 'default'- meaning she could somehow restore the current shape of her body, including anything she had changed about herself while soapy, back to normal. She assumed all devil fruit users knew deep down what their bodies were meant to be, to prevent Luffy from springing out as a slinky in his sleep, or Robin from accidentally growing dozens of hands while distracted. Not that she understood it exactly, though.

Back in the present, Zorro was pulling up a barrel with a sign attached, clearly an offering to the sea gods.

"Wonder what it is?"

"Let's crack it open and find out!" She mentally facepalmed, but didn't bother stopping them. What harm could some extra supplies and sake bring?

A shiny new Nami: Part three- A very unwelcome visit

A whistling noise sounded as a flare shot up above them, triggered by opening the barrel.

"Is this someone's idea of a prank?" Nami was disappointed, as Usopp ranted about the possibility of a curse from the sea god, and was told of the ghost stories surrounding this part of the sea. Somehow, he had found a string of garlic and a cross, and was making warding noises around them. Funny, she hadn't seen either of those around here before...

A loud creaking noise announced the arrival of another boat, a majestically huge, abandoned ghost ship.

"Where the hell did that come from!?"

"Woooooah…"

"Wait, is that someone singing up there...?" Nami looked up, suddenly seeing a skeleton on top of the boat!

"Yohohohoho~" Could faintly be heard in the distance. So creepy...

"Lets check it out!" Luffy called, running to the edge of the boat. The skeleton had disappeared somewhere, so Nami felt a little braver.

"Wait up! There's usually treasure on this kind of ship..." She stepped forward, the urge for cash overriding her fear.

"I'm going too then, Nami-san!" Sanji exclaimed.

"Naturally." And so, the three of them climbed right up, going over to the nearby anchored ship.

Nami fought the urge to freeze, thinking of the opportunity of treasure, but there was none to be found. Up on the deck, it seemed deserted...

"Hello there."

"Argh! The skelton!" Nami flinched backwards, as it leaned towards her... was it going to do something? She barely took in the cracks around its face, it's razor-sharp sword and tattered clothes, afraid this moment would be her last...

"May I see your panties?" asked a polite voice.

"Hell no!" She punched the thing, pissed off. How dare he!

"Haha, cool! You can talk!" Luffy leaned on the side of the ship next to her, grinning.

"Indeed I can."

"Can you take dumps?" Surely he can think of a better question?! Sanji yelled at Luffy for the exact same thing, as the skeleton replied why yes he could. Surely he didn't have to answer that?!

"Isn't there something better to ask!" Sanji yelled, before they learned this skeleton was named Brook. Nami missed a detail or two, scared of a walking talking skeleton, and at the same time, curious about the afro... It was so thick and fluffy. She nearly asked him how he kept it like that. It reminded her a little of the afro Luffy had worn, the one that had made him stronger against the foxy pirates. Wait, had that actually worked? She had trouble telling.

Transfixed by his glorious hair as she was, she nearly missed the bombshell Luffy announced.

"Come join my crew!"

"WHAT?!" Nami and Sanji immediately announced their protests. Was he serious?

And so, somehow, Brook the skeleton was invited into the crew room for tea with them. Upon meeting Robin, his first question was:

"May I please see your panties?"

"Pervert!" Nami hit him again, hoping he got the message this time. He chatted jovially with the crew as they ate, making a complete mess of himself with the food, and generally fitting in with outlandish behaviour. Usopp was even more freaked out, upon seeing Brook in person, and continued to produce random anti-curse objects out of nowhere. Sanji's only visible reaction was to become even shorter and more easily aggressive, which Nami doubted some of the others even noticed. Somehow, Franky and Robin were barely fazed by the skeleton they were sharing food with.

Brook was quite strange, and Luffy kept insisting he had to join the crew. Nami's relief was tangible when he admitted he couldn't join, after all of the bizzre revelations he had made (he had no shadow! No reflection at all!). Brook hinted at some mysterious force that would surely kill them all, and that they shouldn't bother trying to rescue his shadow. This suited Nami fine, if she was being perfectly honest. She didn't think they needed to bother staying here for long at all.

Unfortunately, life didn't agree with her.

When the boat had stopped, she had joined Usopp and Chopper in exploring around for the cause, on a mini going merry. It was so cute, that she hadn't paid any attention to the waters, and had been sucked in through the fog, to the point they crashed into a moat. And so, she was stuck with the two of them on a strange island.

"What exactly is this place...?"

"Who cares, let's just get out." Replied Usopp nervously. There was something creepy about this island... A roar from behind confirmed her suspicions.

"It's a three headed dog!" Usopp immediately broke into a run, the result oif a lifetime's practice of being cowardly. Nami and Chopper weren't far behind, the giant beast snapping at their legs.

Wait, I have a devil fruit power now...

Nami gulped, spinning around to face the beast. She flung her arms out, paralysing soap stunning the beast.

"Yes, you did it!" Usopp cheered from behind a tree.

"Wait... look at the stitches where it was joined!" Chopper squealed, pointing at the dog.

"Huh?" Soap was leaking through those stitches! Ten seconds later, they were running for their lives again.

"Huff... huff..." They kneeled behind a fence, some distance away.

"I think... we lost it." Usopp grinned nervously.

"Great... I finally use my powers in battle, and they're useless." Nami rested her head on her knees.

"Relax, it still slowed it down." Usopp counted every second.

"Hello..." Ack! Nami flinched inwards, looking at a vampire-like man. It turned out he was named Hildon, and invited them to take a coach ride to some Dr Hogback's mansion. Nami didn't quite follow who he was, but Chopper seemed smitten with the doctor... I guess it's okay. But the island was so creepy! Shouldn't they just try to leave?

"What is that?" hissed Usopp, looking out the window.

"What?" Nami and chopper looked out, and immediately wished they hadn't. Trees were dancing, mushrooms whistled, and stitched up animals were talking casually. Trees were dancing. Nami rubber her eyes, moving them to see nothing. Wait, what?

"You guys saw that…?"

"Yep."

"A-huh."

"Coach!!!"

Hildon left to relay the message, and take them back to the beach so they could leave. However, he never came back. After ten minutes, there was nothing around them… that bastard had deserted them! Next time Nami saw him, he was gonna pay…

And so, they continued, walking through the island. They saw no more trees or animals acting strangely, but that didn't mean they weren't. As they passed a graveyard, they really should have known something would happen.

"Z-z-z-z zombies!!! Usopp fell backwards, barely avoiding an out stretched arm reaching from the ground. Nami and Chopper struggled, freaking out.

New power… please work… Nami sent soap in all directions, soaking the yard… but the soap drained out of the stitching from the zombies, stunning them for mere seconds.

"Crap!" She fell down, dozens of zombies grabbing her and pulling her down…

"Usopp fire star!" Flames hit the edge of the pack, sending them cowering.

"Quick, get out of here!" Nami was so relived, she could have touched Usopp! For a hi-five, maybe. If he continued to help her, in a few years time, she might have been able to even kiss him on the cheek, or stop hitting him. Not both though, obviously. I mean, just look at that nose.

The zombies turned out to be able to run extremely fast, disappointing the trio. And so, they made their way to Dr Hogback's mansion after all, seeking immediate shelter from the zombies.

A/N: Ack, sorry about the massive wait! I wanted to re-read the whole thriller bark arc, to get an idea of where I was going (and totally not spend all my time playing pokemon games). Good news is, I have this all planned out now, and updates should be somewhat more consistent. Poor Nami… I couldn't make the soap too powerful against zombies, or else the entire thing would change :P

Next up: The bathroom attack scene! How differently will this play out, when Nami has the field advantage?