I own nothing Rachel, Ivy and Co all belong to Kim Harrison
I needed to get up now wasn't the time for indulging myself. I had to leave before Rachel came to talk to me. The knock came as I finished drying myself off. "Ivy please can we talk" I couldn't, grabbing the first thing that came to hand I hurried to get dressed. "Ivy we need to talk, look it's not what you think. Please can I come in?"
Reaching out I got the window open my left leg dangled out as her voice soft with pleading came again. "Please Ivy". The desperation in her words stopped me where I was. Wavering I looked back at the door, maybe I should stay and talk it out. It would be over quick, one more heartache, just one more moment widening the gap between us. The door knob moved and adrenaline had me out the window before I could think.
The night was still early, inderlanders roamed among a few remaining humans going about their lives. My gaze caught on two women laughing, their hands gently entwined and my heart clenched. Twisting the accelerator I roared through the streets, I had already been speeding but what did it matter.
The streets turned grimmer, seedier, the run down apartment block fitted in perfectly. Parking up I stared at the door, did I really want to do this again I had called earlier she would be ready for me, there would be no need for her to talk. The inside was worse then the streets, the squalor and despair more concentrated in the smaller space. The gunmetal grey door opened as soon as I knocked, the scent of Rachel reached me and my need for blood roared to life. Pushing her back into the small room I bent my head to her shoulder breathing in the scent as I kicked the door shut behind me.
Pushing silken red hair out of my way I nibbled on her neck I flooded the room with pheromones, pleasure filled moans and whimpers escaped her as I played with her scars. The apartment was a hovel, a studio flat barely big enough for a bed. "Do you give this to me?" tilting her head to the other side, she presented her neck to me, giving me her answer. A sigh of contentment slipped from me as my fangs pierced cashmere soft skin and the hot rich liquid it protected filled my mouth.
The feel of her running down my throat was exquisite, I was alive and her blood sang to me promises that I always would be. Holding her upright with one hand my other slipped below her shirt as I guided her back and on to the bed. Her body felt delicious against mine adding touch to the sensory overload I was experiencing. Her breasts were so soft, a nice weight to them and with hard little nipples that begged for the attention I was glad to give them. As my fangs bit deeper wrenching strangled sounds of pleasure from her.
Her moans heighten my enjoyment, spurring me on. My hand moving to travel down the supple expanse of her soft stomach, to the waistband of her jeans. My fingers struggling with the buttons as she clutches at me urging me on. I was so close to heaven so close to pleasing my dear heart to feeling her pleasure spill on to my fingers.
Something wasn't right though her aura was wrong she wasn't giving me much and our auras weren't merging. Something was wrong with my Rachel, pulling back from her throat the illusion caused by Rachel's scent shattered and my desire for her blood along with it.
"Please ivy don't stop please" her hands pulled at me uselessly as I sat up straddling her. "No" her body writhed beneath me trying to gain the release that had been so close. "Damn it ivy when are you going to get over her? You can't go on like this." Controlling my anger I looked down into the living vampires eyes her anger and frustration evident on her face. "I'm doing fine" I wasn't sure if Bekki was going to scream or punch me instead she looked at me with eyes full of pity.
"No you're not your dressing up a living vampire of the lowest order in the clothes of the woman you love just so you can feed. Your a long way from fine". The truth of her words bowed my head, god how had I become this.
"We have been doing this for weeks now it's not helping you. Ivy look at me" rising my head slightly I met her gaze, her cheeks flushed and her breathing still laboured. "You need to take her ivy, you and I
both know all you have to do is play on her scars. I know you don't want to but this is killing you. It won't hurt her ivy and we both know you will be a good gnomon. Rachel wants it she's just not willing
to face it".
I couldn't think like that I couldn't, I was afraid of what I might do. Picturing Piscary's face I shut my emotions down. Leaning down I pinned her arms to bed my blank face and empty gaze had her struggling once more beneath me, this time in an attempt to escape but as she had said earlier she was the lowest of the living bloods. Bekki was no match for me and she knew it.
"Rachel is mine I will decide what happens not anyone else" shaking her head Bekki face became mirthless and defeated. "Your wrong ivy everyone is after her and you can't run interference anymore this
isn't Piscary. The witches have turned their backs, cast her out and this just the beginning they and the humans will start to hunt her. Cormack is a politician and Rachel is fast becoming too much of a liability. Trent Kalamack hates her and would be more likely to give up drug running then help Rachel. That leaves the Weres and they can't protect her without revealing the focus which will start a war. Yet you could protect her from it all by simply giving in to what you both yearn for. You can save her by binding her to you ivy."
My hand hitting the side of her face was surprising I hadn't even finished the thought. My anger and fear warred with in me and I hated her for the truth of her words knowing they would haunt me. Pushing my fear and anger aside I let my voice remain as empty as my face. "Save her by damning her, by raping her you mean. I won't do that to her". I wanted to hurt her, make her take it all back as if somehow that would make what she said untrue.
Gracefully climbing off her and the bed I started towards the door. "She would thank you for it in the end, you could have everything you want Ivy, you're only unhappy because you chose to be and the longer this goes on the more damaged you're both going to become. I've had enough Ivy I'm sorry but I'm not going to dress up for you again. You can find another desperate vamp to play your sheep". Her words drifted to me across the fog of my mind images of Rachel by my side, in my bed and bound to me were too prevalent for me to really think.
The corridors where empty as I made my way back downstairs the sounds of from behind the each of the apartment doors mocking me, love, anger, peacefulness I could hear them all but I couldn't be part of them. I was grateful to final reach the car park, rain was falling lightly now and getting on my bike I looked back up at the building. The last time I had sworn I wouldn't come again just as I had every time I came here. The blood in my stomach felt rotten and dirty but I knew it wasn't the blood that was dirty.
Forcing myself to keep the blood down I started the engine and pulled out onto the street. I didn't want to do this again but I knew I would, I would talk Bekki round or if I had to I would find someone else. I would carry on stealing sets of Rachel's clothes and using them to cover others in my dear hearts scent then bring them back and wash them with Rachel none the wiser. The corner was slick and treacherous here forcing me to focus for a minute as I raced through the city.
Oh I would lie to myself tell myself I was doing it because it was the only way I could feed, that I had to convince the monster that it was my dear heart or my instincts would reject them. And it was true it was nearly impossible to feed now without pretending it was Rachel. Ever since our auras had become one the monster inside had wanted no one but Rachel. That wasn't the only reason I did it not really, after all I could have gone on a blood fast. Instead I found a willing and desperate vamp with red hair and played my own version of kinky dress up because for those few minutes I could pretend that my life was whole. The rain was worse now the freezing water stinging as it pelted me, emptying my mind of everything I focused on seeing how fast I could go.
The sky was beginning to lighten as I parked my bike besides Rachel's car. Jenks and Rachel would both be asleep which gave me a few hours to come up with a plan. Slipping soundlessly into the church I placed my boots in their spot in my rows of shoes. Sighing slightly I quickly arranged the small mountain of Rachel's shoes into orderly lines. Maybe I should buy us a nice shoe rack it would have to be custom made perhaps floor to ceiling along this wall. Not that it would stop the problem but at least I would have more reason to be able to shout at her about it.
I headed to my room chuckling slightly at the thought of the look on Rachel's face as I guilted her into tidying up her shoes. "Do you want a cup of coffee?" Rachel's voice was quiet and full of hope. Standing rooted to the spot I tried to decide what to do. Jenks buzzed towards me his voice too low for Rachel to hear "I told you what would happen if you ran away to avoid talking about your feelings. The kids have pixed every bit of underwear you own". The venom in his tone was surprising "and you need to go in there and listen to what she has to say you stupid lunker. I swear if you don't let her talk to you, if you run off again tonight before she's finished then for the rest of your life every bit of clothing and every scrap of bedding you own will be pixed so bad that you'll itch worse then a fairies crotch. Do you understand me?"
Frustrated silver and black dust shifted from him, catching in the air, swirling and dancing joyfully before all too quickly reaching the ground. "Ivy are you ok?" flying closer he stood on the end of my nose forcing me to look at him "Ivy? Did something go wrong while you were out? Did someone take advantage tell me now Ivy". Resisting the urge to shake my head I forced the words out instead. "What if she tells me to leave? Jenks I'm not even sure I can take hearing her say she doesn't want me again". Jenks wings beat faster and his dust took on hues of blue. "It will be ok Ivy she's not going to ask you to leave but you kissed her Ivy she has a right to talk about it with you".
He was right of course, I had to talk to Rachel and besides it wasn't as if the day could get any worse. "Ok Jenks your right, it's better to get it over with quickly besides I don't want to spend the rest of my life itching". Raising my voice so Rachel would be able to hear me "ok I'd like a cup, thanks I'm just going to dry off" lowering my voice and arching a brow enquiringly I turn my attention back to Jenks "that is of course if my towels escaped the pixy wrath?". "Hmm maybe there's only one your going to find out". Laughing Jenks flew back towards the kitchen.
My room was as I had left it except Rachel had shut the window. Grateful that she had and my room wasn't an ice brick I grabbed the towel off the back of my door. I couldn't smell pixy dust and my hands hadn't begun to itch so it did indeed seem the towels were safe. Stripping off my wet clothes I focused on gathering my will together I had to be ready for Rachel's talk. For all her claims that we were just friends we seemed to have an awful lot of these talks. Far more then I had ever had in any relationship.
I knew I was stalling for time as a debated what to wear deciding against underwear since this conversation promised to be uncomfortable enough without itching like mad. I went with a black silk nightie and put my robe on over the top. Taking a last in the mirror I squared my shoulder and headed to the kitchen.
The kitchen smelled of fresh cookies and worry, snagging a cookie off the plate I took my seat. Rachel baked the best things when she was anxious or thinking. Oh god yes it was good, flicking my tongue out I licked my lips clean of the delicious crumbs.
"So err you have a good evening?" Rachel winced slightly at her own question. I tried to keep my tone light "not really Jenks was right I should have stayed and talked". Rachel seemed completely wrong footed by my admission if I wasn't dreading hearing Rachel's denials I probably would have laughed. "Right well yes you should" Rachel fidgeted in her seat and pulled at her cuffs I frowned slightly at that it wasn't a good thing for Rachel to be picking up Al's habits. Taking a sip of lukewarm coffee I waited for Rachel to continue. "I wasn't trying to pull away".
"What did you say?" taking a deep breathe Rachel looked up at me "I said I wasn't trying to pull away". I couldn't be understanding her properly. She must be talking about something else. Realising the coffee cup was slipping I tighten my hold as I took a deep breath, but the air held no scent of Rachel, there was worry yes but it was old. "I can't smell you" glancing down at her own cup Rachel nodded "I thought this might be easier if I wore the perfume". It was a good idea.
A/N: So what do you guys think? Sorry this has taken so long to get up I wrote it weeks ago unfortunately I have been extremely unwell and it delayed me typing this up (I'm meant to be resting my eyes so if anyone asks I was never here). So the next chapter should be their talk and was originally going to bring the IS agent back in but I'm thinking I may just change things around so that the next chapter is the last.
