I do not own Chuck.

/

Sarah is visibly shaking as Chuck slowly approaches her from behind. He rests his hand on her shoulder and turns her gently. She grabs him fiercely and holds him tightly. Chuck is slightly confused and just holds her intimately.

"I'm so sorry!" She cries out painfully. "I should never have let them take you!"

"It's alright," he whispers.

"No it's not! They changed you!" Chuck has no idea how to respond as he just holds her close. "They took the most loving, caring, sweetest person and forced you to live alone in this bunker!"

"It's not that bad," he consoles her in a hush tone.

"How could they do this to someone who has so many people who cared about him?" She cries out in pain and sorrow.

"Sarah, I know this isn't the best time, but I, uh, want to, uh, make sure you are okay and want you to stay here until you feel better," he says worriedly. He mentally scolds himself for not saying he loves her. "Is that okay?" She just holds onto him, not wanting to let go. After a long pause, she finally gathers the strength to say something.

"Okay," she mumbles in gloom. "I'll be out in a minute. Just let me clean myself up," she informs him.

"That's fine, I, uh, will be waiting, uh, outside," he reluctantly lets go of the woman he loves. "Take your time," he releases her and gives her a look that shows she is safe as he steps out of the bathroom and closes the door.

"Get it together!" Sarah tells herself angrily. She looks into the mirror where her eyeliner is smeared from the tears. She runs her face under water for a minute and dries off. She quietly steps out of the bathroom, feeling embarrassed for breaking down like that. She sees Chuck on the couch and freezes as she hears his voice carry a conversation with itself.

"Dammit! I'm such a loser!" he scolds himself.

"Yea you are, moron," he gets angry.

"Why couldn't I just say it?" He thrashes around in anger.

"That's because you're a pussy," he condemns himself.

"I need to tell her I love her," he orders himself.

"She seemed pretty heart-broken."

"She did. I just wanted to tell her everything will be alright and kiss her."

"Oh, those lips. They are so beautiful and luscious. I would love to just taste them."

"Shut up! We're talking about Sarah here!"

"I know. She is so beautiful. It is just so painful to see her in that sad. I just think a kiss would make her feel better."

"You may be right, but I don't just kiss the woman I love unless she loves me back."

Sarah is appalled by this frightening, yet relieving conversation Chuck is having with himself. She doesn't want him to know that she has been eavesdropping, but she wants to hear what he is saying. She feels for him and wants to show him that she does in fact love him.

"How would you know? You've never loved anyone else like you do Sarah."

"Because I know myself and that is who I am."

"Do you know yourself?"

"Shut up! I'm going to make sure Sarah is alright. You need to stop questioning me," he angrily tells himself as he is about to turn around to look at the bathroom door.

Sarah freaks out a bit and quickly climbs back into the bathroom. She calms her breathing after seeing something so hard for her to watch. The only person who makes her feel wanted and appreciated is scolding himself for not saying he loves her. She shakes it off and steps out of the bathroom and smiles at Chuck. He smiles back.

"You've never looked more beautiful," he compliments her to make her feel better.

"Thanks," she says dejectedly as she looks at the ground.

"Are you still hungry? The pizza should be done any minute now," he informs her calmly.

"Sure," she says sadly. Chuck gets up and walks towards the oven. When he gets next to Sarah he places his hand on her shoulder and looks into her beautiful blue eyes.

"Everything will be fine, I promise," he says with conviction. It makes her feel a little safer and less vulnerable.

Vulnerability has always been Sarah's nightmare. Some people are scared of cockroaches, some are scared of plane crashes, Sarah is afraid of being vulnerable. This is how it has always been and there is no changing it.

Chuck opens the oven, the pizza smell assaults his sense of smell and he smiles. He pulls it out and cuts it into slices. He gets two plates and puts a slice on each. He hands one to Sarah. "I hope it's as good as the outside world," he jokes, trying to make her feel better.

"Thanks," she tries to flash a smile but it falters. Chuck pulls the seat out for Sarah to sit in. She sits down and he slides her chair in. He sits next to her and smiles.

Sarah stays quiet throughout dinner as Chuck keeps stealing glances to see if he can come up with a way to tell her how he feels. While this is happening, Sarah's mind is in a similar situation. Sarah's mind is in disarray over hearing Chuck's conversation about how much he loves her and how she should bring it up. She was never good at this, so obviously she will have to be brave. She doesn't think of saving lives as brave, but telling your feelings is the bravest thing she could think of. She definitely wants to tell Chuck because he seemed so devastated when he couldn't before.

After they finish, Chuck sincerely takes Sarah's plate and puts them in the dishwasher. Chuck doesn't know how to approach her about her gloominess and struggles to say anything. "Sarah, I want to see you smile," he confesses carefully not to go over any boundaries that Chuck thinks are there. "I miss it so much and will not give up until I see it." She looks at him, wanting to smile, wanting to tell him how much she loves him, but she is too afraid. "I understand you may not want to talk about it now, but please, I don't want you to leave until you I see that smile. You can stay in my bed tonight. I think some good sleep will be helpful."

She looks at him with a mixture of hope and sadness. She nods her head in agreement and he leads her to his room. The first thing she notices is the picture of her with him from Halloween. He pulls the covers off so she could get in and he gently helps her step in. Throughout all of this, she is still debating on the best way to tell Chuck how she feels.

"Thanks," she murmurs as he tucks her in nice and snug. He carefully leans forward and places a soft kiss on her forehead. He was scared out of his mind when he did it, not knowing what her reaction would be, but she seemed content about. This put Chuck way more at ease.

"Well, I, um, am going to sleep on the couch," he nervously says. "Goodnight." She looks up at him with a longing look that is filled with depression and need. He doesn't know how to read it so he turns around and heads for the door.

Sarah is mentally bashing herself. She wants him to stay so badly. As he walks away, the chance of asking him to stay is diminishing. She squeezes her eyes shut as she tries to muster up all the courage she can. "Chuck!" She almost screams.

"Yea?" He turns around with his lopsided grin shining on her. His hand was on the doorknob, ready to close the door.

"Can you stay with me?" She asks softly.

"There isn't anywhere to sleep, oh, wait, I could bring in a couple chairs and, uh, sleep on them," he nervously assures her that he'll stay. She looks at him almost horrified.

How could he put himself through that torture? That is awful that he would do something so painful to himself for her. She cannot let him do that. She needs to tell him not to.

"I'm already intruding by sleeping in your bed. The least you could do is sleep in your own bed," she states apologetically.

"But, uh, you're, like already in the uh, bed," he fearfully explains. He obviously doesn't understand that Sarah wants him to stay in the bed with him. Either that or he is just too scared.

"There's enough room for the both of us," she lightly pats the empty space next to her. Chuck nervously stands there, not sure what to do. He is making inaudible sounds in confusion.

"Are you sure? The chairs are quite comfortable," he says out of fear.

"I want you to," she states softly.

"Oh, uh, alright," he uneasily agrees and slides into the bed on the opposite side of the bed with as much distance from her as possible. She cannot help but think of how adorable Chuck is when he is nervous and how he is always nervous around her.

"You can make yourself comfortable," she lets him know in a friendly manner after seeing him uncomfortably on the edge of the bed. He slowly slides closer to her so he can be comfortable with a safe distance from her, all while grinning awkwardly.

Sarah still wants to tell Chuck how she feels about him, but is still frightened of the consequences. She steals a glance at Chuck who looks worried and on edge. She feels bad for making him feel awkward and confused. She really does want to just be held by him. She wants him to say everything will be alright because his words hold a security that no one else's holds to her.

"Chuck? I'm a little cold," she insists hoping he will get closer to her.

"I could, um, grab some blankets," he claims with the same nervousness, "or, uh turn off the a/c?"

The first thing that goes through Sarah's mind is 'can't he take a hint?' Then she realizes how Chuck hasn't had human to human contact for almost a year. Obviously he is going to misconstrue what she says. Chuck starts to sit up before she stops him.

"I don't need any of that? I need to tell you something," she forces herself to tell him how she feels.

"Are you sure? It's not hard to get," he implies sincerely.

"Please, Chuck. Just…" she slides closer to him until her face is within a foot of each other's. Chuck looks scared and unprepared for whatever happens next. "Just hold me."

Chuck gives her an eccentric subtle nod and sheepishly snakes his arms around her back. In doing so, he pulls her closer to him and she sighs in content. Chuck holds her there awkwardly. He hasn't been so close to someone for almost a year, let alone the woman he loves.

Sarah is still battling her fears of telling Chuck her feelings. She feels so relaxed and protected. She just wants to rest in his embrace forever and knows the only way to make it better is if she tells him how she feels. She still hates being vulnerable and this will make her the most vulnerable.

"Didn't you, um, want to tell me something?" He asks sheepishly. Sarah tells herself that this is it. There is when you tell him how you feel. There is not hiding behind some false statement.

"Oh yea," she tries to approach it casually. "I heard you talking to yourself while I was in the bathroom." Chuck's eyes open wide and he instantly blushes from embarrassment.

"How, um, much did you hear?"

"Enough to know how much you love me," she confesses carefully not to freak him out too much. He gulps loudly in humiliation and fear. "Don't be embarrassed," she states with conviction. "It's alright," she smiles at his nervousness, "I feel the same way about you." She purposely avoided saying the words 'I love you' because she doesn't know if she could say it.

"What?" He asks while his nervousness slowly fades away.

"I…" she needs to say the word 'love' and it creates an internal struggle between her fear and courage. "… Fell for you a long time ago," she confesses with struggle, again avoiding the word 'love.'

"Re-really?" He is frozen in shock.

"Yes. You were the only one who makes me feel like a real person," she admits with conviction. "You always treated me like a friend over a spy and I knew how dangerous it was so I let them take you in hope that I'll forget you," she swallows loudly while Chuck just lies there in shock. "But I didn't. I couldn't forget about the one man who made me realize how much I wanted friends like you." She stifles tears to the best of her ability. "I needed friends like you."

Chuck is relieved that she loves him but now freaked out about her bold confession. Chuck cautiously holds her closer to him and stares into her gorgeous, mesmerizing oceanic eyes.

"C-can I, uh, kiss you?" He nervously asks. He has wanted to so badly and misses her taste that he last got over a year ago when they thought it was a bomb but ended up being Bryce. She doesn't really move at all. She doesn't flinch, she doesn't nod, and she doesn't give him any indication of yes or no. Chuck gets scared and tries to recover without looking hurt. "I just uh, thought because you uh, said that you uh, loved me. It was a stupid question. I'm sorry for asking." She glances at his lips briefly and closes the gap herself.

Chuck sighs in pleasure and passion. He unleashes the caged passion that he wanted to show her for since he met her. She lets him have his way with his tongue and his hands holding her into him. His hands are ravishing her back as she moans in his mouth. This is something they both wanted for so long that the sparks are invigorating their whole bodies. After what feels like hours, they both lay there breathlessly and Chuck smiles at Sarah.

"Sarah?" He asks quietly.

"Yea?"

"I love you," he admits as if the world's weight just fell of his shoulders.

"I love you too," she smiles at him as Chuck drifts off into sleep.

/

When he wakes up, his groggy vision is blurry. He can barely make out the bright room and Sarah isn't next to him. He feels next to him and when it is cold he calls out her name.

"Sarah?" He asks worriedly.

"Sarah?" He shouts franticly

/

I hope everyone is enjoying my story so far. Please review with any ideas, comments, criticism, praise, etc. It is always encouraging to see the number next to Inbox" on my email address.