Author's Note: For those not familiar with "A Really Cool Dance Song," it is a satire of dance music, hype, and record executives' inability to recognize such satires.

"Uh, yeah, hi, guys," Harold said awkwardly, "There is nothing to worry about. And we can go ahead with the material we planned…" He tapped his foot, and then he faced the audience and said, "I'll be right back."

The stage was left empty for a few minutes, until all of the cast members returned together. Harold was visibly huffing and puffing, and then he said, "Without further ado, the Bird Calls skit."

The curtain was raised. Cody and Beth were standing in front of a blue background with clouds painted on. There was also a small link of a white picket fence, and what appeared to be a telephone pole. Cody was holding a pair of binoculars. "Hey, Cody, what are you doing?" Beth asked.

"I'm bird watching," Cody responded, "It's very interesting."

"You know," Beth responded, "I'm very good at bird calls."

"Like what?" Cody asked, looking as curious as possible.

"Like this one," Beth said, "A ratta tatta patta moolatta greenblat redblot eekock peacock!"

"That's not any bird call I've ever heard!" Cody shouted. Suddenly, Harold, dressed in a ridiculous beak, and very showy green feathers swooped down in front of them.

"Kukaluka!" Harold screamed, pointing his face upwards.

"What is that bird?" Cody asked, "I never saw any bird like that."

"Why that is a ratta tatta patta moolatta greenblat redblot eekock peacock!" Beth said, "Isn't he adorable?"

"Kukaluka!" Harold screamed again.

"Well, yeah, but what did you say it was: a ratta tatta patta greenblat redblot eekock peacock?" Cody asked.

"No!" Beth responded as if Cody's question was really dumb. "I said it was a ratta tatta patta moolatta greenblat redblot eekock peacock."

"What's the difference?" Cody asked, shrugging. Suddenly Noah appeared on screen dressed in a tiny black beak and velvety-looking red wings, and swooped in front of them.

"Kakalaka!" he screamed, turning his head to the side.

"Kukaluka!" Harold screamed back, and then they began pecking each other.

Beth pointed to Noah and said, "That's a ratta tatta patta greenblat redblot eekock peacock. They're bitter enemies with the ratta tatta patta moolatta greenblat redblot eekock peacocks!"

"Oh," Cody said, hitting his forehead, "Of course. Why didn't I know?"

The curtain came down.

"Wasn't that great, guys?" Harold asked the audience. The audience did not respond, although Tyler attempted to cheer. Harold tugged at his collar slightly. "Without further ado, Cody dancing!"

Cody went out on stage. He was nervous. After the poor reception to the Bird Calls skit, he was certain that his dance would go twice as badly. Noah picked up on this, and was about to head out to the stage to give him moral support, when Harold grabbed him by the hem of his sweater vest.

"Oh no you don't!" Harold said, "You've heckled enough for one day."

"I wasn't going to heckle Cody!" Noah shouted, offended. "In fact, I was going to give him encouragement."

"Right," Harold said.

"Can I give Cody encouragement?" Beth asked, grinning.

"Of course!" Harold told her. She squealed with glee and headed out to the stage.

"Yeah, because that empty gesture will totally help him more than the praise of a harsh critic!" Noah complained. He struggled to escape Harold, and told him, "You've been awfully grabby today."

On the stage, Beth was cheering, "Go, Cody! You can do it!"

Cody was still visibly nervous. Noah, still having trouble escaping Harold, shouted at the top of his lungs, "You're a damn good dancer!"

Cody heard this, and then he smiled. He began to dance, when he realized there was no music playing. He whispered in Harold's general direction, "Where's my music?"

"Oh," Harold said, and then he turned on the music. The song was "A Really Cool Dance Song" by Bowling for Soup. The irony was intentional on the part of the cast members, and it was not lost on such audience members as Gwen and Izzy, but went completely over the heads of Justin and Heather.

Cody did a variety of dance moves that varied from boy band choreography to break-dancing. Beth watched in awe, clasping her hands together and grinning. Noah watched similarly in awe, but was not as obvious about being impressed. The audience cheered when he finished, and he smiled. He walked off stage, and said, "Thank you."

"Admit it," Noah said to Harold, "I averted this crisis."

"I admit nothing," Harold said.

"Now it's time for our last sketch of the show," Cody said, "The Tea Party!"

He walked offstage, and the curtain was raised. Harold was standing around holding a teapot, while Noah, Beth, and Cody sat around a table with teacups on it, acting as immobile as possible. Beth had a large pink bow, Noah was dressed like a dinosaur, and Cody was dressed like a bear. "Would you like a spot of tea, Mr. Wuzzles?" Harold asked in the general direction of Cody.

"What do you think, Sherlock?" Cody responded.

"Ack!" Harold said, "You're talking! But… you're a doll!"

"Well, he's certainly more delightful than you," Noah added.

"Hey!" Harold said, "You're toys! How are you talking?"

Beth responded, "And you're a grown man! Why are you playing tea party with dolls anyway?"

Harold walked off screen stage right, whereas Noah, Cody, and Beth walked off stage left.

Harold returned, holding a phone. He said into the phone, "Hello, I think I need a shrink."

Cody in a bushy gray mustache, notably on a different background, said in a faux-German accent into another phone, "Very interesting."

"Come on!" Harold shouted into the phone, "This is important! My toys are talking to me!"

"Have you tried… taking the batteries out?" Cody continued in his faux-German accent.

"No, you don't understand… I think they're sapient!" Harold murmured into the phone.

"I don't have time for this," Cody said, continuing his faux-German accent. He then hung up the phone, and exited stage left.

Harold sighed. "Shrinks; only available when you don't want them!" he closed. The curtain came down and the audience applauded.

"Well, that's almost all the time we have for today!" Cody shouted, "But tune in during the end credits to see Beth perform a trick!"

The audience applauded some more.

"Hey guys," Cody said, "You didn't fight throughout the entire third act!"

"Well," Noah said, "To be honest, Harold did start a fight with me."

"He did?" Cody asked, "When?"

"When I wanted to give you encouragement," Noah said.

"Oh, yeah," Cody said, shuffling his feet, "Thanks about that."

"Don't… don't mention it," Noah said, and then he turned away.

"Guys!" Harold shouted, "I think we may have recovered during the third act! I was so terrified it was going to be an even bigger flop than the first two!"

"Well, you know what, it wasn't!" Beth shouted excitedly.

"Okay, to ensure that it stays that way, no one disappear in the next minute!" Harold requested. No one did, however Beth pointed out that only she had something left to do.