A/N: I'm sorry it took me this long. I go to this strict high school and didn't have that much time left from studying. By the way I was the only one to get an A on my biology test in the whole class. Ya girl is a smart cookie lol. I hope I didn't loose the few readers I have with the wait. This was originally long so I cut it in two chapters. This is in Paul's pow from the past and the next one is in the present. I also want to say some Edward and Bella fans may be mad at me. I was trying to make it sound like Paul and I love Edward. He is one smooth sexy vampire. Oh their may be grammar and spelling error. if your the type of reader who listen to song while reading like me. I suggest trey Songz Can't Be Friends fits this chapter best.

I remember the first time I saw Leah. I thought she was some a exotic beautiful rare creature. She was really beautiful with her long wavy raven hair, copper skin and brown oval shape eyes. She smelled so good it was like kiwi and lemon. Just like the forest wild and free. It matched her personality a free spirit with a feisty side. I liked that about her she was her own person and took nothing from nobody. That was something we had in common though. Even though I found her attractive I didn't make any moves on her because the woman was a living fire cracker. Just waiting for her next prey to release her angry wrath. The very first time I meet her she the complete opposite. We found her under a tree covering herself like a ball in her wolf form. She looked so fragile and sounded angry and confused. she was grieving over the death of her uncle. When the final stage of her grieving was over she became angry. Unfortunately Sam was her next target. So I stayed away I liked living with my ball attached. Leah just had to much baggage for me and I already had my own problems. It was clearly the wrong time for her to start dating again. So I kept me distance far away as possible.

It was hard but I kept my self busy with other woman. At one time we all liked Leah. Who wouldn't but being inside her head is a different story. She was always so angry and mad at the world. Sometimes she would think of things to make us all die of discomfort. Thinking of things uncomfortable like her period and that was just cruel and unnecessary. I mean we all had the worry of living another day for another battle but worrying about a female cycle is just foul. The I started thinking I doge a bullet because I didn't what to do the same thing like Sam. I wouldn't want to think of the consequences if I did maybe she would go full out revenge mode. Thinking of ways to kill me painfully and slowly she that sorta person. I bet then her life would truly then be a living hell. Always afraid to start a relationship and being dump for someone else. Thinking she was never good enough. Don't get me wrong she was a very confident woman but it was always that worrying the back of her head. I thanked god I'm a man because being a woman is to complicated.

She got her heart broken and changed packs. I wasn't the only happy hell the whole pack was when Leah changed packs. We no longer had to hear and fell her depression thoughts, but I think I might miss her cheerful brother Seth. He was the one who kept us thinking being a werewolf was a blessing. But hearing his sister thoughts made me realize something. I couldn't have a real relationship with another female. I'll be afraid that at any moment I could imprint on someone else. Sam imprinted on Emily at his and Leah engagement party. We all know how that played out just thinking about it makes my spine shivers. Then I starting hearing how I won't be able to have a real life. I'm cursed to stay here being a protector for la Push. No college or traveling around world like I originally planed to. I know I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed but I wanted to do something with my life. I planned on having a career as a police officer always catching the bad guy. In some ways I looked up to Charlie Swan he was role model. It's a shame though he can't save his own daughter. His daughter Bella was always in trouble and he couldn't fight for her safely. He would lose a battle to immortals and he was losing her emotional. Instead of going to college for a degree I started a business. Embry, Quil, Jacob and I work as head mechanics in our neighborhood shop and were saving up to buy the place.

Being a werewolf has it ups and downs. Like being extra big, tall, and having huge biceps. That's exactly my personal favorite trait a big hit with the females. Having superman powers of super hearing, sense of smell, and vision made life even more fun. But having these sometimes became useless trying to behave like human because Sam is not fare. He wants us to fit in he said that's the difference between us and the cold ones others known as the Cullens. I just can't believe that we are even in the same category with those blood suckers. Matter of fact all they brought all the trouble to our land. If Edward was one-hundred years old he should of had more self control and maybe so much hell would of have been upon Forks. But no Edward found that Bella girl so interesting that the vamp royalty had to come in the picture because they broke the law twice. Turns out him and Bella knocked some boots and conceived a half and human baby. The first time was when Edward turned Bella into a vampire. The second was when Sam and the Volturi found out Bella was pregnant. I'm happy we didn't kill the baby though because Jacob finally imprinted on their baby Renesmee. We call her Nessie for short. She's really beautiful and intelligent but it can be frustrating talking to someone who's younger and smarter than you. It can be really insulting when physically she's only two and can be you at every game made. So of course when the Volturi we stood up to protect Nessie.

I'm happy it all turned out they lived happy ever after. It was about time because if I heard one more time how Bella rejected him I was going to rip his tongue out. Nessie is about five years old now and looks fifth teen. Were waiting for a wedding invitations but Edward wants them to move slow. Sadly on my part Jacob left the single club. Leaving only leah, Embry, and me from the originally group besides the newbies. If it was my decision he should of moved on a long time ago. Bella was not all that if she wanted someone over him she wasn't worth it. After the great war of Renesmee was over life was a breeze. We didn't have patrol so much and had more time on our hands. Especially with all the new werewolf's we got. Sam and Emily were finally planing their wedding now that everything has settled down. As time went by me and Leah got closer nothing romantic if that's what your thinking. Embry was to much of a goof ball to take anything serious and that's how me and Leah became close. We became what I like to call party buddies always their to cheer the other one up. The first person to call to party when needed to forget the past. We were together there was no thoughts of the past or future. We just lived for the moment and enjoyed the present. We became something similar to best friends. The only problem being we had arguments on a regular basics. That's what pissed me off the most and some times furniture got destroyed. The argument would start off with us disagreeing with each other something small. Then I would have to let her have her way and walk away. The she would follow only to nag me more. It got to the point when I would think she liked arguing with me. Which I'm all for but if nothing benefits from it knock it off. No guy wants to angry with the woman knowing it wouldn't have a happy ending. You know what they say the woman is always right. Well I say we just agree so you can shut up.

Months passed and we accomplished a close friendship. I was excited when we became a little more than friends. My plan was finally going were I wanted it to be but I would never tell her that I was taking this secret to the grave. When Sam's and Emily's wedding day finally came I had Leah right were I wanted her. Leah was the made of honor and it pained me to see her face. Outside she looked happy for her cousin standing right beside her. Their relationship was back on track and talking again. Leah was the bigger woman and kept her promise to be Emily's maid of honor. Only if you really knew her like I did you could see it was a cover. Leah has moved on from Sam a long time ago but she never was the same. Wasn't sure of her self and I always there telling her how beautiful she was. I wanted to get this ceremony over so could comfort her. I could see it wasn't a genuine smile because it didn't reach her eyes. You could always tell when her eyes crunch up and you can see her dimples. The one thing that's better than her smile is the sound of her laugh but I don't know how to explain it. When I'm around her and she laughs it makes me feel like I did something right.

While they were on their honeymoon we and Leah left. From that day on we became even closer it was more than partying. She would talk to me more often on a different level. Couple of time I found her at home alone crying and comforted her. I know if it were me she would be there to do the same thing. Matter of fact she saved me those crazy chicks who couldn't understand it was over. That was our job to cheer the other one up and have a good time. We talked on the phone more often and I would spend more time at mother house. Whenever she didn't feel like leaving we would watch movies and she would fall asleep on my shoulder. I didn't think anything of it because me were close friends for months. We helped one another when flirting with others at parties. She was like my wing man and helped me decided which girl was best for me. Then their was the time Leah finally surrender herself to me. It was just like any other day I planned to command Leah to go to this club with me. She wasn't answering my calls and I was worried she was crying again so came over. Sue's car wasn't in the drive way and I wasn't sure if Leah was here. I knocked on the door and Leah was more than waiting for me. She opened it and no more than five minutes things became more than friendly. She became aggressive and material was ripped everywhere. One thing lead to another and WE DID IT.

Let me tell you it was amazing. So after that night I expected us to be a real couple. Turns out things don't always go as planned. The next morning when I reached out for leah she was gone. I was disappointed went I didn't feel her hot skin or smell her sweet scent. I got dressed to leave and found her on the first beach throwing rocks in the ocean she looked so peaceful. I knew she heard me walking and I felt upset because I disturbed her. Her whole facial expression changed from content to confusing. I could her her heart rate and it was beating a little faster than usual. I took a seat besides her, asking her first if she didn't mind me sitting beside her. I really didn't know how I was going to say what was on my mind. How to make this decision less awkward for her.

"I knew I could find you here," I began, "I don't know what draws you here."

"I don't know either," she whispered. "There just so many memories I have here as a teenager. Before the wolf thing and back then I thought all the time in the world. Life was so simple then."

"Yeah I know what you mean now it seems like it was all a blur."

"Yeah by now I would be married with children. Living in one of those beach houses watching the beautiful waves. Having a regular period and I be pregnant with my first child."

"Yeah if I could be the reservation I'm not sure if it would make a difference. I'm sure if I would chase after my dreams."

I was trying to be humors covering up the fact that she brought Sam in the conversation. It frustrated me a little to know she had to bring him up now out of all times. Knowing after our beautiful night together. Was I not enough for her that she was thinking of him. That sounds like something a chick would say. I can't believe with all the confident I had I was starting to doubt myself. Leah was the only woman who could make me this this way. She went through a deep meaning relationship and was past the step of puppy love. Leah is the type of woman who knows what she wants and goes after it. She didn't play around and that's what liked about her. She was a real woman.

"Come on," she nudged me. "What were you're dreams I want to know."

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"Why not."

"I just don't want to say."

"Fine," she snapped.

We were enjoying the akawrad silence together looking ahead of the ocean. It looked like it went on for miles and miles. I didn't know how long I could be around the brush with this situation.

"Leah what is so special about Sam," I asked

"What are you talking about." Leah looked him in the eye.

"You know married with children part."

"I don't know..." She paused understanding the double meaning behind the words.

"Leah how is it he comes in the conversation."

"What."

"Are you truly over him."

"Yeah," she yelled. "What the hell is your problem Paul. Why do we have to talk about this now."

I stood up looking down at her. "I'm sick of tired of it. Even after all this time with me it comes back to him. Am I not enough for you."

"Yeah Paul you are," she whispered. "You been real good to me and I appreciate you."

"That's it you appreciate me. I'm I on the rebound just until over what ever it is."

"Paul sit down. It not that serious it's just I scared."

"About."

"The future were are not meant to be. how am I destined to be. I want a happily ever after just like everyone else."

"Are you saying I'll make the same mistake as him."

"No."

I moved closer to her to the point I felt her knees rubbing against mine. Our face were inches apart and I could hear her heart beat a little faster. I was trying to avoid the wolf part that wanted to kiss her. I had to control myself because I wanted to be taken serious. I had to get my point across to make sure she would never make the same mistake.

"Don't ever blame me for his mistakes," I growled.

"Who can you be so .."

I put my finger on her lips to silence her. I had to shut up her before she ruined the moment. I moved my face closer listening to her heart beat. I smirked liking I had this affect over her.

"You have to trust me." I said before I leaned in to kiss her.

She was leaning so far and we both landed on the sand. She broke the kiss to catch her breath. I was on top of her and she smiled. Her hazel eyes were becoming black with lust. I leaned for another kiss. It started off slow just tasting each other. We had all the time in the world their was no need to rush. Then the kiss became more urgent by the minute. I smiled in the kiss and balled a hand full of her hair in my fist. Smashing her face closer to my and the nice breeze didn't help with heat between our bodies. The next thing knew she rolled on top of me. She smirked and had this devious glint in her eye. She moved so fast and even if was prepared I wouldn't be fast enough. She was gone like lightning and I growled. Well I learned one thing Leah likes it rough. I think you what happened next. We did it again. This time we went to my house so distractions.

Afterwards we cuddle and it was ecstasy. The whole time I kept a death hold on her so she couldn't leave. With both our body heat combined we turned the air conditioner on. I was watched her while she slept gazing at her features. She a small smile on her face turning the corners of her month. I gentle picked her because she wasn't close enough. I rubbed my hand down her spine and kiss the hair on her head. I started to humm while I laid kisses on her cheeks.

"Paul," she whined.

"Hmmm."

"I'm tired can you stop?" Leah asked sleepily.

"Sorry," I said kissing her.

"That feels good." Leah smiled enjoying his touch.

"I'm going down stairs to let you sleep now."

"No don't leave me stay right there and rub my back." She pulled me back under the sheets.

"If I don't think could control myself."

"Paul." I put my finger on her lips looking her in the eyes.

"When your finish I'll be down stair to take you home."

That night I drove her home. Both of us smiling and enjoying the other's company. We were holding hands and talking like a real couple. I opened the door for her and walked her to the door.

"Are you going to give me a goodnight kiss." I asked leaning on the door frame.

"No see you later Paul." She ran in the house to lock the door. Leah was lucky she had speed on her side. I went home that night thinking how this was going to play out. Making this can work out after all.

A few days later it was like nothing happened between us. She became distant with me and refused to answer my calls. Naturally I thought it was from embarrassment but she refused to open the door me. I was getting pissed and the next week I demanded to know what was her problem. I came to Sue Clearwater's house and I guessed she was at work. I took the extra key out my pocket and opened the door.

"Sue are you here." There was no answer so went went the stairs.

I opened Leah's door and found her packing. I gave her a ten minute speech and she again said only two words. The most painful "I'm leaving" and I felt depressed. If it was any other woman I would wouldn't mind she would be doing me a favor. No awkward conversation of it's me not you. Her crying on my shoulder and treating my chest like a punching bag. Then screaming I hate you it's over after it ended. I was skilled when it came to ending relationships but the whole act was truly getting old. But when it came out of Leah Clearwater's mouth it had a different meaning to it. I saw her bending over and backing her clothes it was a site to see. The wolf in me wanted to claim her again and show her what's she missing. Instead I just stood their trying to find the right words to say. I didn't want to beg because that wasn't in my character. I had to much pride for that besides she isn't my soul-mate. I still had strong feelings toward for though. I didn't imprint on her so I damn sure was going to beg for her to stay. Even if we weren't meant to be in the future way not the present. I was staring to love her. I didn't want her to leave yet she was my first serious relationship. I know for a fact this wasn't puppy love it was stronger than that. Can you blame me for not wanting her to leave. Leah was my best friend and lover.

Then I started thinking if she did stay what good would that do. Would we start a relationship and move in together being love birds. Then having casual sex it may sound all good but end up being boring playing house. Or even worse if I imprinted and broke her healing heart. I would feel terrible to put her thought that. I was one who helped put her back together again I couldn't leave her damaged. Leah doesn't deserve either she been through enough hell as it is. So I decided then and there this was our last good bye. I helped her pack her bags in silence. I just knew as soon as she had the chance she was going to leave. I just didn't know for how long. She told me she was going to leave for college before and do something with life. She was tired of the same people and needed a new scene.

The next day I drove her to the airport and the drive was awkward. Everyone already said their goodbyes. Sue had to leave for work. Seth had school and didn't want to leave his imprint unprotected. I didn't know how our relationship was going to be from this point on. Do I talk about how I was going to miss her and visit during the weekends to party. Or should I tell her how I feel and have a long distance relationship. Neither of us said a word the only sound was tires hitting the ground. When we got out the car I handed her bags and walk in to send her away. We arrived ten minutes early and I waited with her for the plane to arrive. I couldn't leave yet until I gave her the approtat goodbye. If I thought it was awkward in the car it didn't compare it this. As usually I was the first one to start off the conversation.

"Leah why or you doing this to me," I whispered after two minutes of intense silence.

"Doing what."

"You know dam well what I'm talking about," I answered, "Were we have sex and you act like I don't exist."

"Had to," she mumbled quietly bracing herself for the fight she knew was coming.

"Leah you really pissing me off with these two word answer to my questions. I deserve an explanation."

"Paul what we had was good and let's remember it that way." Oh no she did not just go there if she wants a fight well here it comes.

"You make it sound like we were a real couple when your always the one to leave me hanging."

"Stop being dramatic your making a scene," she whispered.

"So it was a one time thing to you you could said do."

Leah nodded thinking if she was making the right decisions lately. "I wasn't sure then what I was going to do between us. I just gotten my acceptation letter the other day and made up my mind to leave. I haven't decided until two days ago."

"Okay why can't you tell me the important events of your life I thought we were best friends."

"I wanted to but at the time I wanted to remember living for he moment plus you of all people know how it is."

"Are you serious Leah if that was how you felt damn. At least I don't lead anyone on they know what it is."

"Honesty Paul you have a record of sleeping around you must of have your share of lies. Plus I thought you could handle a it."

"Leah you know you're right we had a good time. But you could of have been a woman about it and told me. Instead of ignoring and then wait for the late minute to tell me this."

"Paul look your my best friend and I'm sorry. I wasn't sure and overall confused about everything l just wanted to leave on a good note."

"So you were thinking leaving me with no explanation was leaving on a good note."

"No Paul I love you and I feel horrible but I didn't want it to be hard on us."

"Did you honesty think acting like nothing happened was going to solve our problem."

"No I was stupid."

"Yes indeed you are my friend." I said with sarcasm in my voice.

"Yeah Paul you are the best friend I could ever ask for."

"Yeah I don't know who would be a idea to stay this long like me."

"Paul I love you," she paused, "I just couldn't wait thinking you were going to leave me. I want to move on with my life and live for something."

"Is that all you can what about my feeling. Don't I have a say in this." I was trying to stay calm because I could the play arriving.

"No but I can hear the plane coming. Trust me when I say I was trying to make it easier on us. I love you for being my best friend. I just couldn't handle losing you Paul."

"Okay Leah I hope you enjoy your new life." That was not how I wanted it to end the conversation. If I could be would still be arguing all day but I could hear the plane closing in. I wanted to make this light and remain friends.

"Thanks Paul your the best."

She got up to leave wheeling her bags away. When she walked away from she stopped and looked back waving. At that moment the sunlight was showing and caught the light off of her raven black hair. Giving her the an illusion as if she was glowing like an goddess. I gasped and just stood frozen and all I could do was smile. Making sure she was out of sight I walked outside to my car. Punching the car wheel and swearing under my breathe. How could I be so stupid after all that time I haven't figured it out. Just like Jacob and Bella it all came together and was making sense.