"No," she said, voice muffled by the pillow she clutched to her face.
"Lily, come on, it's been like forever!" James said leaning over her. He gently brushed the hair from the back of her neck and ran his fingertips slowly from the back of her skull to the tip of her spine.
"No," she said a little less distinctly.
"Lily, please,"
Lily sighed and flopped over on her back to deter James from his maddeningly hypnotic massage. "James, I just don't think it's a good idea, to go over there right now."
"Lily it's a muggle holiday isn't it? One that your parents expect us to attend?"
"Uh, we haven't gone to their Valentine's Day party in two years…" she said sitting up in exasperation. James smiled slyly.
"You mean after you threw champagne in Vernon's face and accused him of—what was it—'blinding self love and socially debilitating arrogance'? right?" James kissed her shoulder. Lily rolled her eyes.
"Socially debilitating vacuous-ness if you must know."
"Right! Oh can't we go this year? Please Lily I never ask you for anything, just this one time, please."
James widened his brown eyes to their fullest pleading extent. Lily leveled him with an unaffected glare.
"You do know that Vernon and Petunia have a child, don't you?"
"Yes they did spawn last year didn't they…"
"Shut it, you great git!" Lily slapped James playfully on the shoulder. "She is still my sister you know."
"Lily genetics aside, you can't possibly insist on calling that thing a child. It's a larva."
"James he's a helpless baby."
"I didn't know you could differentiate gender at such on early pupil stage,"
Lily threw off the covers and got out of bed. James grabbed her wrist. Lily looked back and raised a slender red eyebrow at him. "If you promise to go, I'll make it worth your while…"
"Really Potter? And how do you plan to do that?"
James pulled on the captured wrist until Lily's knees bumped against the side of the bed. James got to his knees and suddenly he was slightly taller than her. He kissed the edge of her freckled nose. Then one cheek and then the other, slowly moving along her jaw line, pushing her hair out of the way until he reached her ear.
"I have my ways," he whispered. Lily knew he did.
"Thank you, Violet, I couldn't eat another bite." James said patting his stomach. Lily's mother chuckled, charmed as she always was by her favorite son-in-law. Vernon pursed his lips.
"And what is it that you do exactly, Jim?"
James gritted his teeth at the hated nickname, "I catch bad guys."
"So you're a cop, then?"
James looked at Lily not exactly sure what this term meant. She leaned in, "You should have paid more attention in Muggle Studies…" James nodded and smiled, and winked at her for emphasis.
"No Vernon, James is not a cop, he's works for the government as an agent."
Vernon's eyebrows disappeared into his thick brow skin.
"That's a lie." Petunia spat. The other three couples at the table turned to look at her, it was the first she'd spoken all evening. Suddenly everyone was listening to the conversation.
"No, Petunia, James and I both work for the government as agents."
"Not our government." Petunia sneered.
Lily's father coughed loudly at the end of the table, "Tuney dear, hadn't you better go help your mother in the kitchen?"
"And leave Vernon alone with these freaks?"
A collective gasp went over the table in a wave.
"Petunia." It was Violet, from the doorway, her hands still wet from rinsing dishes; her face red with anger. "I will not tolerate that kind of language in front of my guests."
"Then we'll leave." Petunia said, "Up, Vernon, we're going." Vernon stood awkwardly, as Petunia ran up the stairs to collect her sleeping baby. Lily ran after her.
"Petunia don't wake the baby, just stay, James and I can leave."
Petunia didn't so much as turn; she just ran into the guest bedroom and flicked on the light. A shrill cry came from the room, and Lily walked to the doorway. Petunia sat on the floor trying with all her might to shove the obese Dudley into his winter coat, while he flailed wildly.
"Petunia, please,"
"What?" she hissed.
"I just want—"
"Well I don't care what you want, not in the least." There were tears running down Petunia's cheeks smudging her mascara. She whipped at her face with her free hand, having finally conquered the wailing baby. She stood and slammed past her sister.
"Petunia please—I'm-"
Petunia turned at the top of the stairs, "There is nothing you can say to me that I want to hear. I wish you were dead."
Lily blinked as though Petunia had just sprouted another head.
"I'm pregnant."
Petunia turned and walked down the stairs clinging to the screaming and thrashing bundle in her arms. She walked out the door, Vernon scarlet in embarrassment retreating after her.
James had stood up when Lily did, though he knew better than to follow her. He watched his in-laws leave in a flurry both shocked and surprised by their overly dramatic exit. He turned his laughing face up the stairs to Lily, who looked as though her world had just official collapsed. James took the stairs two at a time; halting on the last one, just below her.
"Lily?"
She looked down at James's anxious face, but her eyes couldn't seem to focus. "Lily?"
"I don't have a sister," she whispered.
"Me neither." James said shrugging. Lily looked at her husband's hopeful face and burst into tears turning and running into the bathroom, James chased after but Lily was able to close and lock the door before he caught up to her.
"Lily?"
"Go away."
"Lily if you don't open this door I will."
"You can't perform magic in front of muggles unless it's for their own safety."
Lily could hear scratching on the other side of the door, "James. DON'T!"
The scratching stopped and the knob turned. James pushed his hand in, fingers clenched around a bobby pin. His face slid in with a shy smile.
"I've been breaking into places for a lot longer than I've had a wand."
Lily covered her face and slipped behind the shower curtain.
"Lils."
"Give me a minute." She breathed trying to collect herself. Petunia's face swam into her vision. Lily's sobbing renewed itself with vigor. James stood on the other side of the curtain teeth clenched against the grating sound Lily's crying. He wanted the throw back the fabric and take her in his arms, but he didn't want to get hexed ten ways into Sunday. It had taken James years to learn that patience was sometimes better than persistence.
"I told her—" Lily swallowed heavily voice shaking, "I told her that—I was pregnant." Lily cried.
"Guess she doesn't want to plan the shower then?"
Lily cried harder, and James winced.
"Lils, it's not as though you thought she'd be thrilled by the news…I mean she sent us a broken hanger for our wedding—remember babe, a broken hanger."
Lily wailed.
"You aren't supposed to be upset," James said desperately, "It's bad for the baby."
"W-what?"
"Yeah," James said ruffling his hair, "It…um…hard wires him for stress, forever! Lily, do you want a kid who can't handle stressful situations with the cool aplomb of his mother?" James thought he heard a breathy laugh, "He'd be awful at quidditch like that—we can't have a Potter who's rotten at quidditch."
"What if he's a she…" Lily asked.
James let his slender fingers pull back the curtain, Lily was sitting in the tub her knees pulled almost to her chin. He looked down heart in his throat. "She'll have to be good at quidditch too, babe, no lame ducks in this family…"
Lily sighed, "Not on your side."
James stepped into the tub and eased himself down beside her.
"I think maybe your sister was adopted…or you know left on the stoop or something."
Lily nudged him with her hip.
He leaned his head against her shoulder. "I love you." He said. "But this isn't comfortable, I think it's making my butt numb…is your butt numb?"
Lily rolled her eyes, "That's the lamest come on, I've ever heard."
James pulled Lily into his lap, and cupped his hands around her soft ass.
"Hmmm," He said, "Doesn't feel numb to me,"
Lily lay her forehead against his, "It's not," she whispered.
He leaned forward and kissed her exposed neck, nibbling at her exposed pulse, "That's not numb either."