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I shot up in what looked like my bed, sweat all over my body. I looked around to see where I was, I was in my own room. I remember being at Embry's house, I remember being with him, being comforted in his arms even though he didn't know what was going on, he was there for me when I need him. He was amazing.

It's hard to believe that I treated him so badly when all he really is is a nice guy. I couldn't shake the feeling that he was still trying to get into my pants, I guess I would just have to wait and see if it would even get that far.

I squeezed my eyes shut remembering why I even woke up with such a fuss, Pete Nickson. The memories haunted my mind now, over and over again like someone was hitting rewind then play. It was like it only happened yesterday for me, I remember everything with no blurs.

I was sitting out front of Satan's Lodge with a old woman who slept in Satan's Lodge from time to time. She was smoking a cigarette and asked me to keep her company for a bit, she began telling me about how her life used to be so wonderful until a fire that caused such a drastic change in her life. She told me to always be a good person, no matter what happened. In the long run it would always count for something.

She told me that she wasn't a very good person and that's why her family died in the fire, and her identity was stolen by a person unknown. A man I hadn't ever seen around before walked up and asked her how she was, she got up and hugged him like he were a good friend of hers.

I eyed him closely, examining him trying to see if I did know who he was. 'This is Erin.' She said to him, he looked me up and down like I was a goddess. His eyes looked bright, he had perked up at the sight of me staring at him. 'Hello.'

He smiled at me, I didn't think much of it. Now, I was almost thirteen at the time, so it was three years ago and I was just learning everything I knew, but I was a little testy towards people I didn't know. Lucy, who had finished her smoke, said she was tired and was going to get some sleep. I shrugged nonchalantly. Pete asked me if I was going to bed anytime soon.

I had shooken my head no and leaned against the shitty door that barely kelp the cold air out of Satan's Lodge, in fact some of the windows didn't even close. You were lucky to get a room with a door that closed and windows that closed. He sat down with me, just stared for a bit until I snapped.

"What the fuck do you want?" I remembered the exact words that came out of my mouth. His smile had grown, he told me he was just staying there for a while until his wife calmed down a little bit. I told him that he should go by a motel room or something because he wasn't welcomed here, and that I bet no one wanted him around.

He stood up walking away when I suddenly felt bad, I didn't like the feeling of hurting some people. Also, I thought he was married and stupid. I should have kelp my mouth shut and went inside.

'Hey, I'm sorry. I'll help you find a room.'

I told him hoping he'd forgive me. I stood up, I knew he was following close behind me what I didn't know was what he was planning to do to me. I felt myself being pushed into a room, the door being pushed back so people could barely see into the room.

I asked him what he was doing, he just smiled and pushed my onto the shitty mattress. It wasn't very hard for him to snag my pants down because they were always so baggy and just hung on my hips. 'Get the fuck off you asshole!'

I didn't have very much, I mean like I had mentioned I just started on the streets and just began pickpocketing. I had just enough to eat that night, so I actually had energy that one night. He had my hands pinned above my head, my heart was racing. I thought I was going to loose my virginity to some stupid asshole.

Good thing that I was so disgusted with him, I got a whiff of his breath that's what set off my stomach. I hurled all over him, he groaned taking his arms away to wipe his face. I kicked him as hard as I could, and I still had my shoes on. I kicked off the remaining of my pants before running down the hall as quickly as I could.

I passed so many people, some with needles in their arms, some with woman on top of them. Good thing I picked the room I did because the man I met in there was a new found friend afterwards.

Long story short, Craig kicked Pete out, and told people in the building if they ever seen him again they'd give him a night he'd always remember. If you are wondering how I was comfortable in a room with a guy after that... not all of them are bad.

Remember Craig saved me from being raped.

I came out of my daze when I saw a figure come into my room. "Uh, yes?" I murmured barely able to see.

I glanced at the time, it was four am.

"Sissy, I can't sleep." I heard a baby voice, one of the voices that made me feel so much better on the inside.

"Come here, kiddo." I smiled to myself, I helped him up into my bed. Carrie bought him a big boy bed, so he could leave whenever he pleased. "Have a bad dream?" I asked him as he lay down next to me, his head on the pillow next to mine.

"Yeah." I could see his pout in the dark, "I don't want to talk about it."

"I had a bad dream too." I whispered to him, "I don't like my teacher."

"Then why do you have him?" He asked me, "Tell mommy to switch him."

Had Carrie told Pete about my streets situation or had he just remembered me. Oh god, if he sees the look I give him next time I see him he's going to know that I know! "I could ask." I muttered, "Let's go to sleep."

It didn't take long before the both of us had fallen back to sleep. We were both woken up by Carrie and Dan sitting on the bed. "Time to get ready." They were both peppy sounding.

I didn't know what either of them did, but it required Dan to dress in nice clothes like dress pants. Carrie just kind of wore whatever she wanted, but her clothes didn't look cheap. Even Jensen's clothes looked expensive, the ones they bought me were pretty expensive.

"Did you guys tell my teacher?" I asked them both.

They looked at each other, "What do you mean tell him? Tell him what?" Dan asked eyeing me carefully. "Did you tell him where I was from?"

"Oh!" Carrie's eyes widened, "No, it wasn't required."

Tears weld up in my eyes, I began to breath harder. "I... oh my god." I gripped my hair, "I don't want to go to school! Not today!" I jumped out of my bed and ran into the bathroom slamming the door behind me.

The bathroom was a blue colour, light blue like the sky. There was a nice white bath tub, a single shower beside it, across from the both of them was a counter with a sink built in then a mirror above it. Next to the counter was a white, clean toilet.

I fell to the cold tile floor, trying to breath but I was making it hard on myself. "Erin, what happened on the streets? Do you know him?"

I sobbed and held my breath, I didn't want to cry. I coughed, I felt a warm tear go down my cheek. "Oh god." I moaned running my hand threw my brown hair, tugging my fingers threw the knots. "I... I don't want to say."

"Honey, please let us in." I ran the tap water until it was warm, I splashed myself in the face with the warm water. I rubbed my eyes, I had red lines in them from lack of sleep and crying. I looked like a mess and I was driving my self insane.

I slowly opened the door to see them both, Carrie pulled me into a hug. "Honey, I know you have been threw a lot. I'm going to be here for whenever you need me and so is Dan. You're going to forget about everything, but if you want to you have to tell us what happened so we can help you."

I nodded my head on her shoulder, "I'll think about it." I murmured. "I refuse to go to school though."

"You don't have to, but no matter what I'm going to find out about what he did to my little girl." Dan looked angry.

I felt my heart warm on the inside, he called me his little girl. I'm a daughter, little girl, and a big sister, I couldn't really ask for much more than that.

"Don't ask him, I just need some time to think about this." I nodded my head biting my lip, "Go to work, I'll take Jensen over to Sam and Emily's." I forced a sad smile onto my face.

Dan kissed my forehead, "You're a tough girl." He nodded giving me a hug before running out the door. "Yes you are, and I've already grown to love you as my own daughter. I really hope you feel better honey."

She gave me one last hug before running out of the house just like Dan had. I walked into Jensen's room, thinking about everything they were saying to me. They said they loved me already, I felt so excepted here. I held back the tears from earlier. "Ready to go to Emily's?" I asked Jensen.

It was so hard to understand that people could love me at a time like this. They barely knew me, but they accepted my into their life like I was their own. Even the young one had excepted me, I loved them all so much.

He yawned scratching his head, "I'm still tired." He moaned, "I have to get dressed, I'll be back buddie."

I walked to my room, I pulled on a pair of track pants, then a baggy sweater to go over my t-shirt I had worn to sleep. I blinked heavily, I swallowed hard still nervous about everything. Walking alone. Living in La Push. Just him in general.

I threw my hair up in a messy bun and put on my shoes calling for Jensen. He came running at me, I opened my arms for him as he jumped into them. "I wish I could drive buddie." I muttered walking out the door.

"Me too!" He exclaimed happily, "You don't sound that tired." I laughed pinching his nose, he giggled in response.

I don't know how I could be happier, well I could actually think of some things that would make me happier. Embry. My emotional state wasn't helping me while I began to think about my parents, my old family, being lonely for all that time.

The tears were welding in my eyes, I must have been getting my period soon because I don't normally get this emotional. Jensen rested his head on my shoulder, "Sissy?" He asked.

"Yes kiddo." I answered, turning up Emily and Sam's driveway. "I love you."

I felt a tear run down my cheek, at the same moment I felt rain against my other cheek. I sobbed, "I love you too cutie." I knocked on the door waiting for Sam or someone to answer the door.

"Hey Er... what's wrong?" It was Paul, I just shook my head at him.

He moved aside not knowing what to do, I walked in still holding Jensen. "Here Jensen." I put him down, he hugged my leg before running over to Claire who was playing with some toys.

"Erin, what's wrong?" Emily asked panicked, I pulled a smile on to my face. "Nothing at all." I managed to croak out.

"Is Erin coming or what?" I moved out of the way knowing it was Jacob, "I'm not going to school today." I sighed sitting down on a chair. I turned my head to see Jacob standing with Embry who looked very worried.

"You okay?" Embry was next to me in a heartbeat, he sat across from me with his hand on my shoulder looking me in my eyes with his infamous intense look.

I nodded my head, "I'm fine, always was." I murmured, lying to him.

"No," He paused, "You're not."

"I'm going home." I inhaled quickly, I should have waited a second before knocking on the damn door. "Bye, I'll see you tomorrow."

I stomped out of the house, it was pouring rain out, but I didn't care. I wasn't going home just yet, I need someway to get some of this steam out. It always happened like this, sad mood. Never knew how to control it so I would freak out sometimes exceeding the point where I would hurt myself, not purposely.

I eventually got home, I was soaked might I add but I felt fine now. I walked into the house up to the bathroom where I could take a bath. After all the water was in I took a step in the water then curled into a ball, I was thinking.

Should I really tell Dan and Carrie about this situation or would they just look at me different everyday of the rest of my life. Would they be disgusted with everything I've done in the past? What if they stopped loving me?

All these thoughts were running threw my head, it was so hard for me to think about anything. I closed my eyes, trying to rest and get out some negative energy that I shouldn't keep. I eventually got really drowsy and decided to go to sleep. I got out of the bath tub and collapsed on my bed, instead of changing I just fell asleep with my towel on.

"Erin?" I heard my name, I glanced over my shoulder and saw Embry. "Embry!?" I gasped pulling on my towel to cover everything.

"Uh, I'm sorry." He shut his eyes, that made me smile. At least he respected me at the moment. "What are you doing here?" I asked harsher than intended.

"I... I came to bring Jensen home. He's watching TV and I thought we could hang out, if you want I can leave because I noticed you were sleeping. I'm sorry." Embry babbled causing me to snort.

"It's fine, just... knock next time alright." I mummbled, I walked to my drawers and pulled out some clothes. After I was dressed I walked up to Embry, just standing in front of him.

"Something wrong?" He asked with worry in his voice. I opened my arms taking a step towards him. I felt his arms wrap around me, I nodded my head.

"I'm scared to tell you." I bit my lip, "You can tell me anything." I heard him mutter in a dazed voice.

"No, I can't tell you anything. You will never look at me the same ever again, this secret is horrible."

I know I was being a sacredly cat, but this was the closest thing to being accepted by people. I didn't realise in order to accept other people I had to find peace with my past, and myself. "Tell me please Erin."

I loved the way he said my name, "Please."

"You know yesterday?" I blurted out, "When I started freaking out on the couch?"

Embry nodded his head, watching me intently. "I was almost raped..." I came out with it, "And I finally figured out that Mr. Nickson... my teacher was the guy."

Before I knew it Embry was out the door of my bedroom. "EMBRY!" I shouted after him, I slipped on a pair of slippers and chased after him. He was stomping angrily down the stairs, he was scaring me.

He was shaking a lot. I gulped, "Embry please, stop."

"How am I supposed to stop!" He shouted, "What he almost did to you is unacceptable Erin! I'm gunna kill that bastard." Embry was one of the scariest people I've ever seen, once I've seen this side of him I know I would never want to make him angry. I mean I knew Paul was scary and had anger issues, but Embry... no.

I think it was his calm expression to everything that made me think that way, he would never give me an angry look. It was like his soul settled down when he saw me, all the anger had been pushed aside for me.

"Wait, wait until Dan and Carrie come home." I pleaded him, grabbing his hand hopelessly. He squeezed my hand, "I'm never going to forget this, he's going to get it."

"Do you hate me?" I asked, my throat getting dry.

Oh god, what if he hated me and blamed me for it saying I was stupid for this!

"Erin, why would I hate you?" He asked, his expression, and voice softening. He pulled me into him, "Because of what I did."

"You didn't do anything." He whispered in my ear. "You did nothing."

"I didn't do anything," I held my breath for a second, "That's just it, I didn't do anything about it. I should have reported it or something, not just stand around and do nothing until I forgot about it that I could barely recognize the guy who did it."

"The school shouldn't have hired someone like that." Embry cooed in my ear rocking me back and forth. "Do you know anything about me?" I asked Embry looking up into his eyes.

"I don't know very much Erin, but I care about you."

"Why?" I asked giving him third degree.

"You're different than everyone in the world, you're worth something to me. I always want you to remember that." Embry had just said the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me. "Thank you Embry." I hugged him tightly.

"But like I said, I'm not forgetting about this. We need to call Dan and Carrie to tell them, or do they know." Embry said.

"They know nothing about it, they don't know anything about my past." I sighed rubbing my temples. "Well where did he nearly... you know?" Embry could barely let the words rape escape his lips.

"At Satan's Lodge... my old home." I murmured, was I going to tell Embry about my past? I had to get it out, I feel like I can't hide anything from him. Like he needs to know.

"Satan's Lodge? Why was he in your house!?"

"Yeah, it was burnt down." I sighed remembering rubbing my temples, I missed the place. I'm going to admit I do. "I think I might have been lucky to get out, and it's every ones house."

"Did it burn you anywhere?" He whispered looking back to see that Jensen was still watching TV calmly. "No, my legs didn't scar." I mumbled pulling up my pant leg, "Little mark here, but it's from glass." I shrugged.

"Wait where were you living this entire time?" Embry asked

"On the streets." I sighed squeezing my eyes shut scared to look at his facial expression.