Chapter 2: TIME PARADOX!

Two years ago…

"Haha, I just owned this guy and stole his car!" Chris yelled, who was playing Grand Theft Auto 4. "Hey Pikette look! I just shotgunned this guy in the face!"

"That's lovely Chris," Pikette said, reading a novel. "Could you at least turn down the volume a bit? I'm trying to read Loveless."

"You can always go to another room," Chris said, who now had four stars and was out-driving a cop car.

"Ugh, fine," Pikette said, leaving the room. However, it wasn't long before outside the room Chris then heard, "Um Chris? You might want to see this…"

"Can't it wait?" Chris asked.

"I'm serious Chris," Pikette said.

Chris sighed in frustration and paused the game. "Fine," he said, following her into the living room. Much to his surprise, he suddenly stopped as the two of them were staring at some strange green portal. "What the hell is that?"

"I haven't the slightest idea," Pikette said. "But it appears to be a portal of some sort. I wonder where it leads to…"

As if on cue, the portal started pulling them in. "You and your big mouth!" Chris managed to yell before the two were sucked in and the portal then disappeared.

Present time…

"Haha, this Collector just got a face full of shotgun!" Chris yelled, who was playing Mass Effect 2.

"Oh Arceus, some things never change," Pikette complained, who was reading a Dan Brown novel.

"Hey, this is an intense game," Chris said. "Having Garrus on my team is good, and I use Jacob in case we get into close combat."

"God, you sound like such a nerd," Pikette scoffed.

"Well, you sound worse when you play Modern Warfare 2," Chris replied back.

"Whatever," Pikette said.

All of a sudden, there was a crash in the living room. "What the hell was that?" Chris asked.

"Hm, maybe we should check it out," Pikette replied.

Going into the room, their eyes instantly widened. "Oh my God," Chris then said.

Before their eyes laid… themselves, although they looked slightly younger. "Chris…?" Pikette said. "Is this really happening right now?"

"Ugh," Younger Chris said. He then looked up and almost jumped. "Who the hell are you!?"

"Me?" Chris said. "Who the hell are you and why do you look like me?"

Both Pikettes were looking at each other curiously. "Is it possible you're me from the past?" Pikette asked.

"It seems like it," Younger Pikette said. "We went through this strange portal."

"Yeah, we're never doing that again," Younger Chris said.

"Seems familiar, huh Chris?" Pikette asked.

"Yeah," Chris replied. "It must've been Celebi's work."

"In our living room!?" Younger Chris said. "Why must it always be me?"

'"Seems like this is going to be an interesting episode," Chris said.

"Got that right," Pikette replied.

"Hello everyone," Chris announced. "And welcome back to-"

"THIS IS MADNESS!" the audience said.

"Wait a minute, why are there all of a sudden two of you and two of Pikette?" Dawn asked.

"It's a long story," Chris said. "And it's only temporary."

"Wait a minute, when did I start getting into story writing?" Younger Chris asked.

"Last year," Chris replied.

"Oh really?" Younger Chris asked. "How many I have now?"

"About fifteen," Chris said.

"Holy crap!" Younger Chris said. "That's quite a number. DAWN!" He then went up and hugged Dawn.

"Um… hi?" Dawn said, who blushed all of a sudden.

"Who would've thought in only a year I'd be seeing you?" Younger Chris said, still hugging her.

"Alright you," Chris said, dragging his younger self away from Dawn. "You do realize we have a girlfriend now."

"Huh?" Younger Chris said, quickly turning around. "Since when?"

"For awhile now," Pikette said.

"Damn, waiting an entire two years sucks," Younger Chris said.

"Oh great," Paul said. "Now we have two Pikettes to worry about."

"Hey, I'm not complaining," Pikachu said, who had an arm over both Pikettes.

"Um, who are you?" Younger Pikette asked.

"He's my…your…our boyfriend," Pikette said.

"Oh," Younger Pikette said. She then smiled. "Well, he is charming and handsome."

"Ah, it's good to be me," Pikachu said with a smile.

"Damn, makes me wish there were two RiRi's," Raiden said with a sigh.

"Anyway, I haven't quite given my heart to darkness yet," Younger Pikette said.

"Great…" Paul said.

"Shut up Paul," both Pikettes said.

"So are we going to do any dares or not?" May asked.

"Shh! May!" Drew said, covering her mouth. "Actually, let's not."

"Good thing you reminded me May," Chris said.

"Damn it," Drew said, glaring at May.

"Sorry," May said with a smile.

"MAY!" Younger Chris said, giving her a hug.

"Oh," May said, who then started blushing. "Hi…?"

"When I was younger I had a huge crush on you and was a huge AdvancedShipper-"

"WILL YOU KNOCK IT OFF!?" Chris yelled, dragging him away from May, about to hit him.

"Don't hit me! If you hit me, you'll get the bruise later!" Younger Chris said.

"Yeah right," Chris said, whapping him alongside the head. "Ow!" he said, all of a sudden feeling pain in his head. "What the hell was that!?"

"What was what?" Younger Chris asked.

"Wait a minute," Chris said. He then kicked Younger Chris in the shin and felt the same thing. "What the hell is this?"

"Wait," Younger Chris said. "I can hurt you and not feel the effects." He then had a smirk on his face. "Come here you."

"No! Get away from me!" Chris said, running away while his younger self chased him.

"I never thought I would see the day that Chris would be arguing with himself," Pikette said. "Oh well, guess I have to take over while Chris is gone."

"Oh great…" everyone said.

"We're going to die…" Ash said.

"I need sugar," Leaf said.

"You really do torture these people don't you?" Younger Pikette asked.

"Yep, and I love it," Pikette replied.

"I get the feeling she's worse than Furyfur," Gary said.

"Speaking of Furyfur, seems like she won't be able to do LTP anymore," Drew said.

"ARE YOU SERIOUS!?" everyone said.

*Hallelujah Chorus starts playing*

"Okay, good for you," Pikette said, stopping the music. "But you still have me and Chris though."

"Unfortunately," Ash said.

"Now then, let's get onto these dares," Pikette said. "Oh yeah, we have a special guest with us today, since she practically begged- I mean asked, to be on the show. Everyone, meet Kaeri, aka Kaeria-chan."

POOF! "Yay, I'm finally here!" Kaeri said happily. "Hi everyone! Hope you have fun suffering today."

"Encouraging words…" Dawn groaned.

"Actually Dawn, yours is a fun one," Pikette said. "These dares are from Monica, aka M the gate to all you people who are retarded. Yes, I just insulted all of you."

"What else is new?" May asked.

"Anyway, Dawn, you have to pepper spray Paul," Pikette said.

"What?" Paul said. He all of a sudden got sprayed and started cussing out a large vocabulary.

"Ooh, that had to hurt," Kaeri said.

"Yes, and its fun to be the spectator," Pikette said.

There then came a pounding at the door. "Oh no, not Scorch again," Kaeri groaned. "He's always too protective of me."

"Don't worry, the door's fully fire-proof and bullet-proof," Pikette said.

"Bullet-proof?" Younger Pikette asked.

"Hey, you never know if a person or Pokemon is carrying firearms," Pikette said. "Let's see here… May, you have to go the rest of the chapter without wearing your bandanna."

"Oh, that's not so bad," May said, taking it off. "But then again, it is Monica."

"Can't you always keep it off?" Drew asked. May then blushed at the question.

"But Drew has to watch a FarAwayShipping video," Pikette said.

"Why Monica WHY!?" Drew said. "Why must May always get it easy!?"

"Sorry Drew," Pikette said, putting him into the closet with the TV.

"No offense, but that shipping is just wrong," Gary said.

"Yeah, I know," May said. "I mean- umm…"

"By the way Gary," Pikette said. "Monica wants you to stop stalking her!"

"I am NOT stalking her!" Gary said. "Can't a guy just say hi?"

Soon, Chris came back in covered in bruises. "I hate you so much…"

"I know," Younger Chris said with a smile.

"Hey Kaeri," Chris said. "Did you just get here?"

"I did," Kaeri said. "And you missed some good dares."

"I figured," Chris said. "Wait, where is Drew?"

"He's in the closet watching FarAwayShipping," Pikette said.

"Oh that's just wrong," Chris said.

"And we have a possible angry Infernape at the door," Pikette said. "The Swear Jar came to good use."

"Oh God, how can I forget about the Swear Jar?" Chris said.

*Flashback*

"Hey, what's this?" Pikachu asked, looking at a large jar.

"That's the Swear Jar," Pikette said. "Everytime someone swears, they have to put in a quarter."

"Where does the money go?" Pikachu asked.

"I don't know, we could use it to spruce up the house probably," Pikette said. "Maybe throw a huge party?"

"F*cking awesome," Pikachu said, putting in a quarter. He then walked over to Raiden. "F*ck you Raiden."

"Ha, f*ck you Pikachu," Raiden said.

--

"Can I borrow your Electabuzz Paul?" Dawn asked. However, Paul just ignored her. "Can I borrow your f*cking Electabuzz Paul?" Paul then sighed and gave her Electabuzz's Pokeball.

--

"We're gonna go out there, and we're f*ck up some sh*t!" Ash said, addressing his Pokemon. "We're gonna f*cking kick some ass and tear the f*cking sh*t out of this gym leader, we're gonna make him cry his f*cking eyes out like a f*cking eight year old." His Pokemon just stared at him. "Right Pikachu?"

"F*cking right," Pikachu said. "Man are we going to owe a fortune to the Swear Jar."

--

May sighed while looking up at the sky. "Poop."

"Doesn't count," Drew said.

"SHUT THE F*CK UP!" May snapped.

--

"You know, I've got something to say to all of you," Pikette said. She then cleared her throat. "F*ck you. F*ck you. You're cool. You're pretty. F*ck you. F*ck you. And… f*ck you."

"That was fun," Pikette said. "Oh, feeling better Paul?"

"Oh yeah," Paul said, his eyes red. "I'm feeling all fine and dandy."

"Wonderful," Pikette said. "Because now you get to dress up as Maria and sing "My Favorite Things."

"Damn it," Paul said.

"Here you go buddy," Pikette said, giving him his clothes. "I love being evil."

"Um, how exactly did you give your heart to darkness?" Younger Pikette asked.

"I'm curious as well," Kaeri said.

"Long story," Pikette said. "You'll find out at some point. Oh yeah Leaf, here's a huge bag of cookies."

"YES!" Leaf said, taking the bag and eating all the cookies in one gulp. "WOOHOO!" she yelled and then started attacking Ash.

"Aah! Get off me woman!" Ash said.

"I better go get Drew," Chris said, going to the closet. Drew came up looking zombified.

"That… was so wrong," Drew said. He then went over next to May. "Please don't date any emos."

"Promise," May said.

"And here comes Paul!" Pikette said. "Oh how adorable!"

"I'm going to kill both you and Monica," Paul said, looking like a nun.

"Whatever," Pikette said. "NOW SING!"

"Fine…" Paul said.

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

Cream colored ponies and crisp apple streudels
Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings
These are a few of my favorite things

Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
Silver white winters that melt into springs
These are a few of my favorite things

When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad.

"Aww… that was cute Paul," Dawn said.

"So will you come back to me?" Paul asked.

"No, I'm still with Ash," Dawn said.

"Yes!" Ash said.

"Damn it!" Paul said.

"Hmm, I guess that will about do it, don't you think Pikette?" Chris asked.

"I believe so," Pikette responded.

"Well Kaeri, it was nice having you on here," Chris said. "Sorry it couldn't have been longer."

"No, it's fine," Kaeri said. "I enjoyed myself. See you all later." POOF!

"Well, until then everyone, make sure to read and review and come up with dares," Chris said. "This has been another episode of-"

"THIS IS MADNESS!" the audience said.

"Man, I had no idea two years in the future would be so different," Younger Chris said.

"Things have changed," Younger Pikette said.

"Well, that's life I suppose," Chris said. "So, how are you going to get back?"

"Not sure," Younger Chris said. All of a sudden a portal showed up. "Oh. How convenient."

"Guess you get to go home after all," Pikette said.

"Indeed," Younger Pikette said. "I think I will have fun becoming evil…"

"Oh, it is fun," Pikette said.

"Well, until then," Younger Chris said. "Let's go Pikette." They then went through the portal.

"Hmm… it was nice to relive the past," Pikette said. "But where did this portal come from?"

"That was actually me," Chris said, grinning.

"Wait, what did you do?" Pikette asked.

"Well, instead of sending them to the past, I sent them to the future."

"Why?" Pikette asked.

"Oh come now," Chris said. "You really want the past and present altered?"

"True," Pikette said. "Didn't even think of that. Screw them then."

(A/N: By the way, thank you Kaeria-chan for being on here and hope I did good. XD)

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