I Feel Pretty (And Gay)

And so began the tedious process of searching for answers. Had this been a wrestling match, it would have been L against Kira. Well, honestly, that was how the competition had always been. Something just wouldn't be quite right with the world if those two weren't pitted against each other in some way. Anyways...

The stakes were different on each side. For L, the sole purpose of investigating the jellyfish was to protect his beloved sweets. Definitely a just cause. At the same time, if anything relating the jellies to Kira happened to be discovered, the detective would take all necessary actions to use this to his advantage and bring the mass murderer's reign to an end. Whew, that took a lot of breath...

For the other contender, his reason for pursuing the investigation actually ran along similar lines. But instead of defense, Yagami Raito was on the offense. He wanted revenge, simple as that. He had been kidnapped and basically gang-raped by a mass of jellyfish, and he would not rest until he had found a way to bring them to justice.

Pausing a moment to rethink that statement, Raito realized that this must be the same way L felt regarding the Kira case. This similarity disturbed him and left a bad taste in his mouth. Maybe something to eat will help me rid myself of it... Because he was now at home instead of headquarters, he strode into the kitchen for his favorite snack; consomme flavored potato chips. He opened the bag dramatically and took up a chip in hand, then ate it in a dazzling, extravagant fashion. Sparkles (srsly?) flew off as he ate.

"Onii-chan, why do have to eat potato chips so dramatically?" Sayu had just wandered in and witnessed her brother's strange eating habits involving oddly tasting junk food items (of which were sold for ¥395 per 400 grams at the local grocery store...). He paused midway through a chip to reply.

"It's not dramatic, it's just how I like to eat." A little show but not over the top. Don't judge me because I like to eat this way! If someone were watching me, I would want them to think only the best of me. Something like, 'Oh! This guy looks GREAT eating chips. So dashing and handsome, he couldn't possibly be a mass murderer! Kira would never dream of eating chips with such pizzazz.'...

"Yeah...right. Oh, hey, so what are you going to do now that you're all rainbow-y and stuff?"

When Raito and Soichirou had returned home the previous night, his family's initial reaction had been one of shock. And rightfully so. An honor student, their prodigy, now looked like a sno-cone with a tie. Yes, the tie was rainbow too. When his mother and sister first saw him, Sachiko dropped the plates she was carrying and Sayu started laughing hysterically. Neither helped settle Raito's mind. And while his family had gotten used to his new look in a relatively short amount of time, he still felt insecure and unsettled.

His reputation, though it hinged primarily on his superior testing and studying skills, also relied heavily upon his physical appearance. He was Japan's top student, and now he was rainbow. In his mind, 'rainbow' and 'awesome' could not possibly form a sentence together. Rainbows were juvenile, not serious enough, too colorful. DEFINITELY not him. And then there came the more modern connotation following rainbows and the people who wore them...

I am NOT gay. But people who don't know me or are stupid won't know that just by looking at me. My entire reputation could be destroyed by this! He hadn't wanted to leave the house all day for fear of being discovered.

Raito's train of thought became disrupted when he heard a knock on the front door.

"I'll get it!" Sayu ran hurriedly to the door.

"Oh, hello! Just a sec...ONII-CHAN~ YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS HERE!"

Goddamit!

Forcing a calm look upon his face, the colorful young man walked to the front door to face Misa. He wasn't sure what her reaction was going to be, something he considered strange considering she was fairly predictable emotion-wise, though she was a little reckless. As usual, she was garbed in a Gothic-Lolita outfit, complete with matching jewelry and a purse.

Upon seeing Raito, she dropped the purse and covered her mouth with her hands. A terrified look came across her pretty face. She was so stunned she couldn't even speak (You not talking is not a good sign...Is it that bad?).

"Uhm...Misa...?"

Her eyes were wide in what Raito thought to be terror, but this look was soon replaced by...was that laughter? Misa still had her hands over her mouth, but she was obviously now using them to hide the fact that she could not hold back a fit of giggles. Laughter erupted and she doubled over, clutching her side. Midway through a rather hearty laugh, she snorted. Loudly. Her giggle fit ended as she held her nose, which began bleeding profusely. Ha! Serves you right for laughing at me, you dumb bitch!

In an attempt to play 'good boyfriend', Raito led Misa up to his bathroom and procured a large bunch of toilet paper for her bloody nose. Once the flow had been staunched, they went to his bedroom where he promptly locked the door so they could chat in private. Misa embraced her beloved Raito.

"Oh, Raito, I'm so happy to see you! I couldn't wait until next week I had to see you now. But...What happened to you while Misa was away?"

Now in this situation, normally Raito would have told her exactly what happened to him. His enemies, the jellyfish, would thus become HER enemies, and this could better help him in conquering them. But...there was something that prevented him from doing so. If L was so obsessed with the jellies, couldn't Kira use this to his advantage? Distract the sugar-crazed detective, find a way to get his name? Already he had a plan forming, and though it was only a crude, general idea, perhaps it could work for him. He wouldn't tell Misa about his encounter, not yet anyway...

"Oh, my uh, clothes were put in the washer with several packets of Kool-Aid and came out this way. I don't know what Sayu was thinking when she did the laundry. And my hair...it was a dare from one of my buddies at the college." Misa will believe ANYTHING I say.

The statement put Misa visibly at ease and she wrapped her arms around the mass murderer in an affectionate hug.

"Well, I still love my Raito-kun...even if he does look a little...gay..."

Finally! Sorry, took for f***ing ever, I've had TEH WRITERS' BLOCK and been busy with work (I'm a host-busser at a local restaurant :D ). This chapter doesn't really do anything or go anywhere, it mostly just sets up what's to happen next. And oh, how things will be happening! Exciting exciting.

What do you think? Would you buy Raito's excuse? Hahahahahahahahahahahaha...

Please review!

C. Vincenti