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Chapter 5 – Forever and Always

"Stop crying!" Derek giggled, wiping the tears off Addison's face. Addison laughed and pressed her lips strongly against his. Derek pulled her waist tighter and lifter her off the floor. Addison could feel herself fly.

"Why?" She asked, finally able to speak again.

"Why what?"

"Why did we let go?" Addison touched his face with her fingertips; gently caressing his skin and feeling him shiver at every touch. "Why did we let something so good just fade away?"

Derek put his hand over hers and moved it from his face to his lips, kissing it gently. "I have no idea." He closed his eyes. Addison's smoky voice relaxed him. "But, you're here now. And it doesn't matter." He opened them again and stared at her pretty face. "It doesn't matter what we did before or why we did it." His tone resembled a whisper. "It doesn't matter what we'll do later on. All that matters is that I have you now, and I can keep you safe and loved. All you have to do is say yes." He leaned in and kissed Addison's neck slowly, feeling her inhale deeply.

"I say yes." She whispered. He looked into her eyes.

"You say yes." He flashed his best and brightest smile. She kissed his cheek loudly and laughed.

"Think about it, Derek: You have become an adulterous bitch!" Derek laughed loudly.

"I like being an adulterous bitch! It's kind of fun!"

"You do?" Addison kissed him again, and Derek held her closer and closer to him. And they felt they could stay in that moment forever.

The Pittsburgh Plaza

By the time they got to the room, Derek was already shirtless. Addison's nails were pressing into his back to the point of almost bleeding. He threw himself on the king-size bed, bringing Addison with him.

Addison kicked off her suede shoes, lifting Derek's jeans with her foot covered with woollen pantyhose. Derek unzipped her shirt, watching it slowly loosen and fall to the ground, revealing her lace bra. He ran his fingers through her naked back, feeling every inch of her silky even skin. He had missed that feeling that made his whole body spasm gently.

Pieces of clothing fell on the floor repeatedly and the Egyptian linen sheets were getting more and more disorganized. Derek ran his hands all over her thy, sinking his fingers into her hips and feeling all her muscles shaking. Addison's warm lips were now pressed against his neck and her hands examined every inch of his body. And the night carried out a flashback she did not want to end.

ONE HOUR LATER

"Screw your flight! Let's stay here!" Derek pulled a now fully dressed Addison by her hand.

"Derek, I really gotta go back to California!"

"No, to hell with California!" He pulled her more strongly, and she fell on top of him, noticing he had nothing covering his body but thin sheets. "Let's go back to Seattle." He gave her a quick kiss.

"I wish I could, Derek, but, I gotta at least settle things in L.A." She sat up on the bed. "As much as I do wanna stay with you." He kissed her cheek.

"I understand." He sat up beside her and held her hand.

"Thanks for understanding, Derek." She smiled. Things were quiet for thirty seconds, until Derek was the first to speak.

"You used to call me honey." Addison laughed. How could she let someone that cute go? Derek pulled her by the back of her head and kissed her. Addison felt like she could ditch her flight and stay there, but, instead, her reason and soberness kicked in.

"Bring me to the airport." She whispered, getting up from the bed.

"I'll get dressed."

"Thanks, honey."

PIT – Pittsburgh International Airport

"So, you've checked in, you've found your gate, what's next?"

Addison's heart hurt. "Boarding."

"Don't board." Derek's face was so sad Addison wanted to cry. "Please, don't board. Stay here with me." He wrapped his arms around Addison's waist. "There are so many things I still have to tell you."

"I have two hours until I have to board. What do you say we get some coffee?"

Starbucks coffee

"I was thinking about it the day you left." Derek started, taking a sip of his latte. "I thought I didn't love you anymore. I thought Meredith was the one for me. And I thought that, once you were gone, I wouldn't even notice. But, the truth is, I did. I noticed you were gone, I felt you were gone, I saw that nothing was the same without you. And Meredith came to talk to me and not even she was the same! I realized I liked her much more when you were around to call her the twelve-year-old." Addison giggled.

"Not only did I notice you were gone, I noticed how empty everything was without you. Poor Sloan cried all day. The interns asked Bailey every five minutes who would be the next gynnie girl. And Bailey said that nobody could compare. I struggled against my feeling that she was right.

I'll tell you a secret: That day I called you, I didn't dial the wrong number. I meant to call you. I meant to see if hearing your voice would fill that gigantic void left in my heart. And it did, Addie. And that feeling terrified me. I had a woman in Seattle, I had a life in Seattle, I couldn't discover I loved you the day you were leaving me. But, when I saw you in Pittsburgh, everything just fell into place.

I shouldn't be afraid of loving you! I shouldn't be afraid of wanting back something so good that I had for eleven years! It's not bad that I still love you, it's only human! And now I know that you are the one that I wanted."

"Is that why you kissed me in the scrub room?"

"I kissed you because I realized I couldn't wait. During the surgery, your face was covered with the mask, but, I could still see your eyes. And I could see that all you wanted to do was save those babies. I loved your majesty, I loved your intelligence, I loved your ability. I realized you had your looks and all that more. And I couldn't help but think about how Meredith hadn't.

I thought about why I was with Meredith and I couldn't think of a reason. That's when I realized how screwed up my life was. I let you go; I treated you like garbage the whole time you were in Seattle. I was a stupid proud bastard. And I realized it was maybe too late for me to make a move." Addison smiled. It was so not.

"And that's when I nicked Blair's aneurism." Addison felt weird.

"I was the reason you nicked the aneurism?"

"No! I nicked the aneurism all by myself. You were the reason I fixed it. I figured that if I didn't save that girl, you'd never talk to me again. I thought that if I let her die, you'd be so disappointed you wouldn't be able to look at me. And seeing the chance on that happening, I started working fast and precise. And I fixed it. And watching you fix the babies made me thing even deeper into it.

God made us healers. God made us life-savers. If we had argued and weren't speaking that day, that girl and her babies would've died. This was meant to be. You and me. Addison and Derek."

Addison took a deep breath. Meant to be.

"That's all I wanted to say. Can I ask you something now? In peace?"

"Of course."

"Why did you sleep with Mark that night?"

Addison didn't know what to say. "I got home at eight that night…"

FLASHBACK

Addison came out of her bedroom looking stunning. Red lipstick on, with a dress up to her thy, revealing long naked legs. She opened a bottle of wine and put on sexy music, sitting down on the couch to wait. She missed her husband.

Twenty minutes and almost a whole glass later, there was a knock on the door. Addison inhaled deeply and put her sexiest look on to open the door.

To Mark.

"Mark? What the hell are you doing here?" She asked, yelling and covering her legs.

"Why are you dressed like that, Addie?" Mark laughed, coming in.

"I'm waiting for my husband. And, by the way, did I tell you to come in?"

"Oh, I know you want me to come in, Addie. Tu casa es mi casa. That's how we roll." Mark sat down on the chair in front of her.

"What are you doing here, Mark?"

"Derek sent me. He asked me to come and tell you he'd be in a craniotomy."

"Shit." Addison blew on one of the candles on the table, putting it out. "That's the fourth night in a row he leaves me here all night."

"But, now I see he'd much rather be here! He was getting laid tonight!"

"Shut up, Mark. Nobody is getting laid."

"Only because you don't want to." Mark smiled.

"What are you suggesting?"

"Come on. I'm a man, you're a woman. We're both hot."

"Oh my God, Mark! You're sick!" Addison raised her ring finger to Mark's face.

"Hey, don't give me the finger!"

"I'm showing you my wedding ring, you genius."

"You know I have a thing for angry chicks?" Mark flashed an arousing smile.

"You're disgusting. I have a husband."

"Then why isn't he here right now?" Addison's mind was taken by a blind rage, and she immediately ran upstairs. Mark threw his jacket on the floor and ran after her. When they got to the bedroom, Addison ripped her dress apart in one single blow and pushed Mark on the bed, lying on top of him. They were naked in five minutes.

END OF FLASHBACK

"And that's when I heard steps. And you came into the bedroom. And our marriage was over."

Derek was speechless. "So, it was a normal fight between a husband and a wife?"

"We would've gotten past it."

"Oh, my God, Addison! I'm so sorry! I didn't even listen to you! I kicked you out of my house!"

Addison didn't know what to say.

"I threw your clothes on the sidewalk! I… I said we weren't Derek and Addison anymore." Derek sounded like he couldn't believe his own actions. "And when I came in and saw the candles, I thought you were having a long affair with him! But, that was all-"

"Yeah, Derek. It was all for you." Addison tried to say that in the nicest way she could. She couldn't make him cry. He was silent for a few seconds, struggling against tears of shame.

"What if hadn't sent Mark? What if I'd sent Liv or any other girl doctor?"

"We'd still be married."

"Oh, my God. I can't believe this. I'm such an ass. I don't deserve you, Addison Montgomery!"

"Are you kidding me? Of course you do!" Addison pressed her lips against his firmly. "Don't ever doubt it, Derek! You deserve me and much more!" All of a sudden, a number was called in the air.

"Passengers of flight AA2387, to Los Angeles, now boarding gate 5R."

"I gotta go." Addison said, standing up.

"I wanna make this up to you. Wait for me in L.A."

"Okay." Addison said, smiling.

"I love you." He said, kissing her passionately. She felt her heart about to burst out of her chest.

"I love you too." And walked away.