All the Italian on this chapter was only possible because of the help of my good friend Ilaria Marilli. Grazie di cuore!

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Chapter 8 – Ti ricordi di me?

"Violet, can I speak to you for a second?" Addison opened Violet's office door and looked inside, seeing that she wasn't with any patients.

"Sure, what's going on?"

"I've got a patient I'd like you to see." Violet and Addison left the office, walking towards the kitchen.

"What's wrong with her?"

"She's got multiple personalities' disorder."

"You mean DID?"

Addison went into the kitchen with very slow steps. She picked up a glass of green juice and sat down, her back facing the door.

"What's DID?"

"Dissociative Identity Disorder. Multiple profiles, distorted self-image, you know the drill."

"Yes, that's what she has." Addison said, confidently.

"Don't you think I should be diagnosing her?"

"Both her personalities showed up here today, Violet! One of them wanted me to abort her child, and the other one was thrilled that she was pregnant and was seeking pre-natal care."

"Oh, that involves an ethical grey area…"

"That's what I'm trying to say."

"Addison, before I step in here, you must be sure that these two women are actually… one woman."

"They had the same tattoo. I'm telling you, there is something wrong with her brain!"

All of a sudden, a different voice spoke.

"Brain? I know someone who could take care of that." Addison looked behind her, in astonishment. A young woman, appearing to be in her mid to late twenties, leaned against the kitchen door. Her shoulders were covered by thick black hair and her thin body was hugged by basic jeans and a tank top. Her eyes, staring at Addison, were of an unmistakable blue. Her lips were contracted in a very bright smile. "Hey, Addie. Remember me?"

Addison could only think of two words. "No way."

"Amelia Shepherd?" Addison stood up and ran towards her, giving her a firm hug. Violet knew what the last name "Shepherd" meant, and sneaked out of the kitchen, leaving the two alone.

"Addison Montgomery." Amelia giggled. "You've aged!"

"May I say the same?" Addison laughed. "Where have you been, Amy? Last time I spoke to you, you were living in Italy!"

"Yeah, yeah. È una vecchia storia ormai."

"Huh?"

"It's all in the past now." They both giggled.

"I can't believe how much I missed you." Addison put her hands on Amelia's shoulder. "We have so much to talk about. And, by the way, my brother is the only one who calls me Amy these days. It's Amelia for everyone else."

"Oh my God, you're so grown up!" Addison touched Amelia's face. That girl was like a daughter for her. Amelia smiled.

"Speaking of my brother, where is he?"

"In Seattle, of course."

"Why isn't he here with you?" Addison felt her heart ache.

"We're divorced, Amelia. He doesn't have to live here with me."

"Come on, Addie. I could see you too divorced. I mean, I was fine with that. But, separated? 900 miles apart? I can't see that."

"Why?"

"Because you two hate each other!" Addison was confused. "And it's so intense that you have to stay together stay together anyway, otherwise you'll both go crazy! You gotta show each other the hate, killing each other with your eyes, until you both realize that this hate is actually love." Addison looked at her. She knew Amelia was right. "And fighting is the only way you two have to discover your love. Haven't you ever heard that once you lose something, you start giving it its proper value?"

"Yeah."

"You and my brother? The concrete example. And once you do find your love, it's much stronger than the hate."

"The hate part was pretty strong. Ended our marriage."

"You know, a divorce is the ultimate fight. Maybe it's time to find the ultimate love." Addison smiled.

"I've got a patient. Why don't you wait for me at home?"

Addison's House, An hour later

"I see you've opened up my good bottle of scotch." Addison came in through the glass doors and joined Amelia sitting down in front of the beach. Amelia raised her glass and gave it a half-smile. "So, we have a lot to talk about, huh?" Addison said, pouring herself a glass of scotch on the rocks.

"That we do." Amelia smiled. "For starters, I'd like you to explain why you moved here and left my brother in Seattle."

"No, I go first. Why did you move to Rome?"

"It's pretty obvious, Addie. Wanted to be closer to Castel Sant'Angelo." Amelia laughed ironically.

"C'mon, Amy. Tell me the truth."

"Okay, but I haven't told anyone else about this. I was heading a clinical trial on neurosurgery on Huntington's patients at La Speranza Medical Center. Don't tell my brother." Addison was surprised.

"No kidding! Amelia, that's great!"

"You know me, huh, Addie? Always chasing rainbows." Amelia and Addison shared a smile.

"Why haven't you told anyone?"

"Nobody even knows I'm a brain surgeon."

"Why? This is such an amazing thing about you! I think you should-"

"Derek fully dissected a brain on the eighth grade." Amelia interrupted. "First year Med School, he scrubbed in on a cerebral arteriovenous malformation surgery." Addison smiled. That was quite true. She was there. "He even performed a full lobectomy by himself as an intern. And, then, he married Archer Montgomery's sister."

"What are you getting at?"

"I'll never be anywhere near what Derek was as a brain surgeon. Yes, I was leading a clinical trial on Huntington's, but, I'm an Ivy-League-educated neurosurgeon! That's the least I could do!"

"That's not true."

"It is, Addison. You just don't know it 'cause you never felt it. Sei la miglore. You're the best." Addison didn't know what to say.

"Okay." She later regretted saying that. "So, what were you gonna ask me?"

"Why, why did you move to L.A.?" Amelia aimed her fists at the sky, as if her question was intended to heavens. Addison laughed, but, quickly regained her serious face.

"To be honest, Amelia, right now, I can't tell you why. I don't know why. It was impulsive and stupid. I guess I was just trying to get away of an uncomfortable situation."

"What uncomfortable situation?"

"Derek and I are divorced. And I guess we didn't wanna admit that things were left incomplete. So, you were kind of avoiding each other."

"Typical." Amelia said. "Let me guess: You had a few drunken relapses with Sloan and my brother is seeing a resident who's my age?"

"Yes, except that Derek is actually seeing an intern who is, umm, half your age."

"WHAT?"

"That was my reaction too."

"I can't believe this! Oh, my God, Derek is so stupid! You have got to fix this, Addie."

"How?"

"Flying to Seattle. I'll come with you. We'll book the flights tonight!"

"No, Amelia! I'm not flying to Seattle! I have a job here, I have patients here! And, besides, I already slept with him again."

"WHAT?" Amelia yelled. Addison giggled. "You slept with him again? When did this happen?"

"It was a few days ago, in Pittsburgh. We were both called in, by our old friend Liv, remember her? We had to operate on a woman together. And then, we went together to my hotel, and one thing led to another..." She smiled.

"Addison, I'm gonna ask you something and I want you to be 100% honest with me."

"Okay."

"Do you still love my brother?"

Addison experienced a few seconds of hesitation. "Yes."

"Oh, my God, this is so wrong!" Amelia took both hands to her face.

"What's wrong? Me loving your brother?"

"No! You two are obviously still hung up on each other, not to mention that you will never find love like you found with Derek again, and you're denying it by living here!"

"Do you really think Derek and I are meant to be?"

"You don't? C'mon, Addie, I knew it the minute I saw you two together! Now, just go back to Seattle, see him again, and marry him again for Christ's sake! He'll make your teenage dream of having a husband and kids come true!"

"Amelia, if I go back to Seattle, we'll fight again and won't speak to each other."

"You might." Amelia said. "Or, you might get everything you've been wanting since you were fifteen."

Addison was silent for a few seconds, speechless. "Derek." She whispered.

"Yes. You have to make the first move, because Derek, he's an avoider, he avoids, it's what he does."

"Is that why you moved back from Italy? You avoiding someone?" Addison smiled.

"His name is Lorenzo."

"Knew it."

"I'm a Shepherd." Amelia said, with her young smile lighting up. "I avoid."

All of a sudden, Addison looked astonished and taken aback.

"What's wrong?" Addison didn't answer. "What's wrong?"

Amelia looked behind her and, suddenly, felt like crying. Standing in the doorway, Derek Shepherd, with his thick black hair and eyes of unmistakable blue, dropped his bouquet of red roses.

"What is she doing here?" Vociferated Derek, pointing at his sister, who was sitting down on the couch. Addison and Derek were standing up, arguing in the middle of the living room. It was raining outside and the spot where Amelia and Addison were sitting was already completely soaked.

"Don't talk to me like that, Derek! I'm you sister!""

"Are you? And where were you when dad was murdered? Or when I divorced Addie? Where were you when I most needed you? Living in Europe!"

"Because she was trying to be half the surgeon you are!"

"What?"

"Addison, I told you not to tell-"

"Shut up, Amelia. Derek deserves to know the truth. Amelia is a brain surgeon."

"What? When?"

"When I finished at Harvard Med, I got accepted as a neurosurgical resident at Hopkins." Amelia whispered. Derek looked at Addison.

"You knew about this?"

"Found out today."

"Why didn't you tell me, Amelia!"

"Because then you'd tell mom. And she'd tell Uncle Barney. And Uncle Barney would tell everyone else."

"And what the hell is the problem with that!"

Amelia stood up, with tears filling her eyes. "Because, Derek, no matter how much I tried, I could never reach your level! You were always one step ahead of me, in everything that we did!" She blinked, and tears fell through her cheeks. Her voice was weakened. "I will never be as good as you are, in anything, and I can't stand the comparison! I'm not Derek, I'm Amelia! I'm my own person, and I was NOT meant to be great! I just wish everybody would leave me alone and stop saying how much I'm not a true Shepherd." Amelia let herself fall back onto the couch. Derek looked away.

"Some are born great." Derek stared talking, slowly. "Some achieve greatness." His face was already throbbing with blood, and his cheeks were taken by a scarlet tone. He looked at Amelia. "But some have greatness thrust upon them."

Addison looked into Derek's eyes. "Don't go." He read her lips.

"I'm sorry, I can't be here anymore." And walked through the door, leaving Addison's house. Outside, the rain soaked that bouquet of red, velvety roses. Crying for no one.

Disclaimer: Neither La Speranza Medical Center nor their Huntington's clinical trials are realistic. They are both a creation of David Shore and belong to House, M.D.

The underlined phrase is by the great William Shakespeare.