"Where the hell are they?" Yelled an angry John 'Hannibal' Smith towards an equally angry B.A. 'Bad Attitude' Baracus.
"I dunno Hannibal, but when 'dey get here, I'm gonna hit that fool so hard in 'da head he'll be seein' more crazy stars than before."
"There's no need to get violent B.A., I just want to know what the hell they're doing to be so late!"
: : :
Templeton Peck is a perfectionist. He couldn't help it. He always looked for the perfect gun, car or woman. Whatever took his fancy in the moment.
The perfect gun had to be fast, accurate, hold loads of rounds and be insanly shiney.
The perfect car had to have style, class and horsepower coming out of it's metaphorical ears.
The perect woman... well... she had to be perfectly balenced. Not to much bust, not to much ass. She had to be just right. She also had to have personality and, of corse, be great in bed.
It's very hard for Templeton to find all of the above that ticked all of the right boxes. He had finally found his chromed .45, his '84 'Vette and he had finally found the perfect 'woman'.
But there was only one problem.
His 'woman' was actually a man. And not just any man. Captain H.M. 'Howlin' Mad' Murdock. He is also the man Templeton 'Faceman' Peck is currently making out with in the back of his Corvette.
"Faceman."
"Mmmhmm?"
"Faceman."
"Mmm?"
"FACE!"
"What!"
"Hannibal will be worrin'. We're 3 hours late already! He'll be worried shitless 'dat you've gone and got yourself a girl for 'da night an' B.A. will be ready to pound me into 'da 21st centry!"
"Speaking of pounding you into the 21st centry-"
"FACE!"
"Just making a sugestion!"
"Look. We need to get goin'!"
"Fine. If you insist"
"Fix your hair to, Faceyman. You're lookin' a bit rugged there."
"That's because I was just making out with a frikkin' Tiger!
"You also need to button up your shirt an' fix your tie. And zip up your... erm... pants."
"Oh, sorry. You need to put your cap back on Murdockyman."
The purr of the 'Vette screaching down the country road to where B.A. and Hannibal are based set Faces sences tingling.
He had his 'Vette under him, his gun in his glovebox and his 'woman' beside him. His life was pretty sweet at the moment... until he reached two angry, frustrated and pissed off men.
Shit.
Fini
hehehe... that was fun.
PLEASE REVIEW! I'M ON MY METAPHORICAL KNEES HERE BEGGING! EVEN IF IT'S JUST GREAT, COOL OR A SMILEY FACE ( =] ) !
/caps rape over.
You see that little button down there?
Press it. I dare you.
No. I double dare you!