Ok, drank my Starbucks got some energy, going to try to get through this conversion. Looking at my writing it wasn't where I wanted it to be, so I'm re-wrote everything. This chapter is all about Cho. It is safe to say that my version of Cho is extremely intense and an enormous romantic. She wears her heart most definitely on her sleeve which I believe is not complete OC of her. I hope you like it. Make sure to review, it makes me love the world, and plant trees and donate to charities. Yeah…So review and we can all live in a better world. I have class in four hours but who cares if I love the world? My logic is fool-proof. Anyways my point is to review for then I love you. And my love cures any disease. Except an obsession to Harry Potter…

xXx

Disclaimer: I do not in any way, shape, or form, own anything in J.K Rowling's magnificent world. Enjoy.

Chapter 2

What hurts the most,

Was being so close.

And havin' so much to say,

And watchin' you walk away.

And never knowin',

What could've been.

And not seein' that lovin' you,

Is what I was tryin' to do. – "What Hurts the Most" / Rascal Flatts

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[Cho's POV]

I tried not to run into anyone or anything as I walked down the moving train aisle past crowds of students. I walked carefully in between compartment doors hoping not to crash into any students leaving their compartments. I was Head Girl, and that meant I had a lot of jobs to do before we ever got to Hogwarts. Jobs like walking down the Hogwarts express checking to see people were setting off Fireworks in their compartments or setting their friend's pets on fire. She passed by Harry Potter and his friends, and then the Hufflepuff clan of Susan Bones and the Abbott sisters, and I even walked by Draco Malfoy and his band of potential death eaters. Sorry did I just think that outloud? As I passed by Dean Thomas and his Gryffindor friends I realized I was in the sixth-year section of the train.

I had hated my Sixth year with every fiber of my being I had never felt so helpless or hopeless; the thought of suicide in my mind every day of that year. Where he used to be, there was now a hole in me, which I found myself falling into at night. When I wasn't depressed I was fuming with rage, angry at Cedric for leaving me in this mess, angry at Voldemort for murdering him, livid at the world for not being able to save him. When I wasn't angry I was tremendously emotional always borderline to losing my mind. My world began to deteriorate; I lost my Quidditch skills because my mind was always thinking of something else, I lost my confidence because I began to sink back into the shadows and talk less and less to my peers, I lost my happiness because he…

The train gave a jolt and I was pushed back into reality and I realized I was leaving the sixth-year section and entering the fifth.

My fifth year had been incredible.

I had been in love with the most amazing man ever and he had loved me with all his being. He constantly told me how happy and unbelievable he was to be dating me, to have me as a girlfriend, to know every part of me in great detail and we had only been dating for a few months. As an abstract concept, I would find myself lying my dormitory smiling wondering if I was feeling love. Always the Ravenclaw, I had wanted to analyze my feelings. I had never felt this deep, ineffable feeling of tenderly caring for another person. These emotions and experiences related to a sense of strong affection and attachment. But I was sure it was love because I felt everything in him. I felt an almost obsessive desire and intimacy that I felt with no one else. I concluded that it is perhaps the complexity of feelings that makes love unusually difficult to define, but I was also able to conclude that I would have died for Cedric as he would for me. I remembered the early hours in the astronomy tower after a passionate night Cedric would stare at me and run his hand down and trace every line around my face and stomach. He would study me for hours, never getting bored; his heart bursting with love for me. We were soul mates.

But I should have known that something this good would never last.

Finally, to the left was the Head's Compartment located between the Fifth-Year Section to Seventh-Year section and the Fourth-Year section to First-Year section. I slid open the door and gave a weak smile to the Head Boy.

"What did you get, I'm starving!" Roger Davis exclaimed. I reached into my pocket and tossed him a couple of chocolate frogs, some pumpkin pastries, and a bag of assorted candy. He raised an eyebrow.

"Hand it over, I know you have it on you."I sighed and tossed him over my flask of Firewiskey. He took a swig.

"Ah that's exactly what I needed." he said screwing the top back on and rubbing his temples. I took the flask back silently and sat down across from him.

"So…" A silence built up. He was staring at her. "Cho…"

I bit my lip as I tried not to cry. His face was slowly changing into Cedric. She could see every line change. No it's not him I told myself. He's dead he's gone. Move on. But I couldn't move on. I was broken. He broke me and I was unable to repair.

"Cho! You need to pull yourself together this year. This is our last year and I'm not going to let you stay a miserable wreck." I sighed pulling her robe sleeves tighter over her wrists. If he saw my scars he would leave me. Or turn me in, or worse tell people. No he couldn't see them.

He didn't notice her shift. "I'm your best friend and I'm gonna fix you up ok?" He smiled. "We'll find someone for you. You don't have to be alone, even if you choose to." he finished out of the corner of his mouth.

So that's what he thinks? I'm depressed because I'm lonely? He knows nothing of my past summer. Perhaps you should tell me another voice said to me. No he wouldn't be able to change the fact. The fact that everyone dies around me and it is better to be alone.

"-what about Potter what happened with him?" He was saying. I cleared my throat and said in small voice "Harry was a mistake, I don't even know if we're still friends."

"Cho." he said softly, "Don't do this to you."

"Don't do what." I retorted angrily knowing the answer.

"Look, he started; you had all of last year to get over him, and to accept his death and fine, he looked away, -to mourn for him."But," he looked at her face again, "but it's been a year, Cedric wouldn't want you to be miserable like this and never find love again."

My breath caught audibly in a spasmodic contraction of her throat. I stood up enraged. "Yeah? What do you know about what Cedric wanted?"

"-I..."

"-You know what I think?" I cut in angrily. "I think he wanted to live, alright? I think he wanted to live so that he could come back safely, I hiccupped, and see me ok?"

The tears were started to fall uncontrollably. "-and we could start our lives together!" I yelled through sobs.

"But guess what?" Roger stared, his mouth slightly open.

"Guess what…He. Was. murdered. Did he get what he wanted?" I asked through slow tears.

"I…" he tried to say.

"No!"

"So why... why…do I deserve to get what I want?" I sniffed.

"WHY?"

Roger made to grab me into a hug but I pushed him off.

"I DON'T! OK? I DON'T GET TO HAVE WHAT I WANT. No! Get off of me! Get off!" she was shouting shoving him away. Her attempts were useless; he was much stronger.

"Get off." I sniffed, "Get off."

"Get… get…"

"Shh," he murmured in my hair as he tightened the hug."Shh…shh, it's ok…it's ok… I'm here for you."He pulled back a little and pushed some hair out of my face.

"Roger," I sobbed in his shoulder "Roger…" I hiccupped; "he's gone, he's still gone." I was murmuring over and over into his collar.

He tilted my head up wiped tears away with his thumb, reaching into his pants pocket.

"Love is like a puzzle Cho." he said delicately handing her a handkerchief from his pocket. "When you're in love, all the pieces fit but when your heart gets broken, it takes a while to get everything back together." I thanked him quietly and wiped my eyes.

"But trust me." He continued to stare, his gaze full of intense concentration and affection for her.

"You and me…"

"We're going to find those broken pieces."

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Students were squealing all around me, pushing and shoving trying to get to nearest exits and off the train. "Prefects!" I yelled. "Prefects, control your house! Get them into some sort of order!" But the prefects it seemed were just as eager to get off the train as well or simply couldn't hear me over the bustle. Indeed second years were literally running down the hallways hyper active sending parchment and left over trolley snacks zooming about.

"Uggghh…" I groaned, touching my forehead a headache forming, where was Roger when I needed him!

As I scanned the packed hallways I zoned in on him talking to a very pretty blonde Hufflepuff girl who I suspected for a Sixth-year. He was whispering probably clever 'Roger Charms' into her ear because the blonde was grinning and blushing at the same time. I couldn't see where one of his hands was but I was sure I didn't want to find out the location. "Roger!" I yelled as a Fourth-year ran into her by accident. "ROGER!" I called louder.

Roger looked up annoyed until he realized who was calling him. I made a face and pointed to the chaotic surroundings around us. "A little help! I called out, Mr. Head Boy!" Roger nodded and grinned once more to the Hufflepuff girl slipping her a piece of parchment into her robes. She gave him a peck on the cheek and walked north out the doors.

"ALRITE KIDDIES!" No one payed him the slightest attention so he frowned pulling something out from around his neck.

"Alright, SHUT THE BLOODY HELL UP!" he yelled and then he blew his silver whistle that every Quidditch captain received. It was shrill and earsplitting and most importantly it got the students attention. They looked up from the commotion and glanced at him. "Follow Mr. Davis, I'm sure you lot are all starving, right?" When the crowd murmured in agreement Roger smiled, looked up, and gave me thumbs up.

"I'll take this lot; you do rounds, meet you in the great hall in thirty minutes."

I silently thanked him with mouth movements and turned around to start rounds. Slowly the noise of students faded away until I only heard the train whirling and the low buzz of the engine and air-conditioning. The train gave a warning blow that it would leave in fifteen so I sped up checking every compartment from the First-Year to Fourth-Year compartments, picking up forgotten clothing and also making sure no students had fallen asleep and remained onboard. As I approached the Slytherin Sixth-Year compartment and opened the door I thought I could feel a presence but the train gave another whistle for its ten minutes mark and I quickly left. I went around to the front of the train to check the Prefects' compartment, the Seventh-Year compartments and the Fifth-Year compartments which happened to be way up at the front. Sliding open the door I was relieved to see that no one had left anything until I saw a small battered brown book shoved into the seat cushion.

Property of G. Weasley was written on the back. G. Weasely. Ginny Weasley? Fred and George's little sister? Rifling through it at a closer look I noticed it was a journal and immediately closed it. I made a mental note to return it. The train gave another whistle and I quickly stowed it away in my bag, walking out the train doors up to the last Threstal-drawn carriage reserved for me and Roger, although it seemed as though he had gotten a ride in a another carriage; I suspected the blonde Hufflepuff he had been talking to earlier was involved.

I pulled a cigarette out of my bag and realized a year ago I wouldn't have been able to see Threstrals, but a year ago my father was alive. I tried not to think about it the night was gloomy and rainy enough. There was not a better symbol then the weather to match my mood and this only made me feel more depressed. I took another swig of my flask letting the liquid burn my throat and the smoke burn my lungs. At least then I could feel something. I entered the carriage which took off as soon as I sat down and took another drag. I couldn't wait until this year was over, so I could get away once and for all from the place that had given me the most happiness I could have possibly ever had and then ripped it all away.

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