Chapter 13: Fire, warmth and memories
I keep trying to trigger dormant powers as part of the daily regime. All these donor powers from biters, what do you call those that bit my sires?
Life got more interesting when I tried to make my skin feel warmer. I concentrated on making my hand feel a more human temperature. I started remembering human temperature and tried to concentrate on that in the same way I focus on a form to phase into. I tried quite a few variations on that vein without success. Carlisle came up with the suggestion the molecules move faster as the temperature rises, all that caused is my hand to look like it's mid-phase.
I should know better than to listen to Emmett but no, I tried his idea. He remembered the game hot potato and suggested I should think I had a hot potato in my hand warming it up. I closed my eyes to help concentrate, that was my second mistake. The shrieks and screams alerted me that there may be a slight problem. That was when I made my third mistake, I looked at my hand and threw the offending item away.
At last I started to make some sensible decisions after that. I used my shield to contain the fire that had started where the fireball from my hand had landed. The shield acted like a blanket and suffocated the fire before it did too much damage. I looked at my hand to find it totally unblemished and as cold as it usually is.
I tried to replicate events, this time watching carefully. A flame flicked into existence in the palm of my hand. I could make it grow or shrink with a thought. I tossed it into the air like a ball, catching it as it fell. I closed my hand around it snuffing it out, okay the closing hand was purely symbolic, I thought the flame out; but it looked good!
Where are the smokers when I need them, I flicked my thumb making a small flame appear on the end of it. On the same mentality I used my finger like a gun and made a flame shoot out; a built in flame thrower!
Once everyone came out of hiding, I spent the rest of the day learning and practising. The fire felt hot to everyone else and burnt anything flammable it came into contact with. I panicked about hurting anyone with this new ability. Vampires and fire really shouldn't mix! I spent some time working on a shield to protect them. Emmett made me put the shield on my favourite copy of Wuthering Heights before he trusted me enough to throw the fire at him. I found I could place a shield around someone and the flame had no heat to them, they could play catch with me. Mmm maybe Emmett is rubbing off just a little bit!
I found, by teasing Emmett, I can put a shield on the fireballs. I can stop oxygen getting through the shield putting the fire out quickly or I can move the shield placing or dropping the fireball at will. Emmett got really mad when we were playing catch, I'd catch the fireball with a shield just before he could and moved it backwards and let it drop. He didn't realise I was doing it to start with. It was only when we all started teasing him about missing that he guessed what was happening.
In all my early attempts at throwing my shield I started out with a dome shield covering everyone and everything within the area. Jasper wasn't the only one to have a run in with the shield so I made them more translucent when viewed close up. That wasn't enough for Alice, she wanted them colour coordinated with her outfit; then she complained that when inside a house a shield should be room shaped to make it more aesthetically pleasing. For optimum television viewing she had me throw a blackout shield during the day. I got the hang of allowing the TV picture through but not daylight. I raised the shield a few inches off the floor to stop everyone from walking into things. You can't believe how strange it is to walk in blackness but see your lower legs and feet perfectly.
The fire play really improved my shield control. To give protection against the fire yet still allow the movement to play catch I covered them with a space suit or body suit shield. The first time was the hardest to figure out but now I can throw a shield over anyone I want just by finding their hook.
I noticed Emmett had thrown his last fireball into Esme's flowerbeds, I wanted to stop him quickly. I made his shield solid and black as I threw a shield over the fire to stop further damage to the plants. Esme rush out to yell at him. I lifted the shield to allow Esme to tell him off but his expression halted us all. We rushed to him.
"I'm so sorry Emmett, are you all right?" I knelt next to him with my hand on his arm.
He looked terrified, "I couldn't move, I couldn't see, I couldn't hear or feel or even smell anything. I was just paralysed. What happened?"
With chagrin I admitted, "I solidified your shield, blocking anything from entering it to stop you from further damaging the flowerbeds."
With his sad puppy eyes in full effect, he said in a very subdued voice, "You're scary, please don't do that again,"
Esme stepped in, "I give her my full permission to do that again if you mess with my flowers, you should know better."
I opened a connection to Emmett, "Sorry Emmett, I didn't mean to scare you."
Eleazar and Peter did really well, they must have waited nearly a full minute before they attacked me for more information about what I had done to Emmett.
They earned the right as the next two victims. You'll never guess what they had me doing next, wait for it, yes, more practice.
The biggest thing to come out of the total blocking shield apart from the obvious was when we realised the shield cut out scents. I could shield everyone to block the scent of blood. I started with a block on all smells but found I could block just the more potent aspect of the blood. The potential of that discovery shook us all.
I got the body temperature thing a few days later. Edward and I were sat in his room, well it's our room at the moment. We just sat using a mind connection chatting. Edward took my hand gently inscribing a figure of eight with his thumb on the back of my hand, just as he did so often when I was human. I relished in the familiarity of the sensation. He suddenly stopped, all I could hear in his mind is him saying, "your hand, your hand."
Concerned I asked him out loud, "What?"
A huge smile broke through his shock, "Your hand, it's warm."
It wasn't just my hand, my whole body felt human temperature. I was very reluctant to switch it off in case I couldn't switch it back on again. Edward was emitting so much longing and hope, I didn't want to lose it.
I did turn it off eventually, the invasion by the entire household when they overheard us may have encouraged me to get it done sooner rather than later! I can switch it on and off just as easily as all my other gifts.
I notice I have started calling all my new powers 'gifts'. My dislike of gifts started after my Grandma died. I still don't like receiving presents. Calling them 'gifts' seems a better way to vent my frustration, if only to my own mind, without upsetting anyone.
I know it sounds like they are teaching me to be an ultimate fighting machine but the theory is in a stressful situation like fighting I am more likely to access different powers. The better control I have on each power and the combinations the less likely I am to use them accidentally. While we are outside sparing they are expecting the unexpected, ensuring I have support to help calm me and switch off any new powers as they emerge.
Eleazar still has a moment of panic and fear when he sees all the gifts, his previous experience and his awareness that I am a newborn keeps him and me on our toes. Jasper's experience with newborns and his own struggle with control has him sending awe and envy out followed by a stab of remorse as soon as he realises I felt him. Their concerns and willingness to help me learn control as quickly as I possibly can, help me maintain my focus. Without the support of this wonderful extended family it scares me to think how I would cope.
I spent an afternoon practising different shift shapes while sparing against the usual suspects, Jasper, Emmett, Peter, and Charlotte with Eleazar alternating between joining in and watching to give constructive criticism. Each different shape needs different techniques to make use of their natural advantages. A tracker would question their sanity if they happen across some of the tracks in the field where we trained. How else would I find the subtle differences between Asian and African elephants, stoat and weasel, three and four toed mammoths, Triceratops and Stegosaurus not to mention all the other animals currently alive, extinct or imaginary. I came up with some of my own combinations to use some of the different benefits of different adaptations.
I seem to be limited only by my imagination. The sheer number of possibilities of not only the shape-shifting but all my gifts feel overwhelming.
When we finished I ran back into the woods to change back and get dressed. I was mid-phase when Emmett veered though the woods back from hunting and barrelled into the small clearing I was in. If I had any of my wits about me I could have thrown up a shield over his eyes or thrown a privacy shield around the clearing, let me tell you I use a privacy shield all the time since then. But no, I completed my phase and stood in the clearing naked as Emmett stood and stared. I tried to cover myself with my hands while grabbing for my clothes but vampires have excellent eye sight and an even better memory.
That's when he started the teasing in a singsong voice, "Ooh la la Bella, I've seen Bellsy naked, Eddie hasn't,"
I managed to pull Edward's shirt over my head covering myself. I like using his shirts when I know I'm phasing, they are much easier to get on and off and cover me faster! Not to mention they hold his scent and I feel so much calmer with the illusion of his proximity.
My embarrassment built into anger, I wished I could wipe the memory from his brain.
Charlotte burst angrily into the clearing, calling for Eleazar and Peter to join her as soon as she saw I was decent. She turned her wrath onto Emmett, to her surprise he was looking confused, no sign of the glee that radiated from his voice just moments ago.
The three of them gave Emmett a verbal lashing but his confusion and bewilderment just grew. I followed the emotions. Emmett was totally mystified and upset. Eleazar, Peter and Charlotte went from anger, disappointment and mortification to confusion then to worry at Emmett's responses.
We made our way back to the house. I connected with Rose, I asked her to get back to the house as soon as possible, giving her my memory of events in explanation. She and Esme were spending much of their days at my house with Carmen and the sisters.
Rose arrived at the house just instants after us having run flat out, leaving her car for Esme. We had walked at human speed giving everyone time to process events. Rose was angry at Emmett as she came in but the instant she saw his face her emotions flipped to worry for him.
"They shouted at me, and I don't know what I did. Everyone picks on me," he complained to Rose, feeling sorry for himself.
"Emmett, you ran in on Bella as she phased back human, stood and stared at her as she tried to cover herself then started teasing her. They were justified in shouting at you," Rose explained patiently.
"No, I ran back from a quick hunt because Bella was sparing so hard, let me tell you it's not much fun being eaten by a T Rex shaped Bella. I ran in the clearing as Charlotte shouted at me, then Eleazar and Peter ran in and shouted at me. I never saw Bella phase and I definitely didn't say anything to her in the clearing. She was dressed in Eddies shirt, she wasn't naked," he defend himself, "I'd have noticed that," he waggled his eyebrows as he found his humour again.
I listened to every thought and felt his emotions as he spoke. He was completely sincere.
Dismay hit me, it was me. I had done something to Emmett again. "I think it's me again," I sighed.
"I got really angry at Emmett and wished he would forget the whole incident," I looked up at Emmett glumly, "I'm sorry, that's all I seem to say to you recently, but I really am sorry Emmett."
"So I really saw you naked and now I can't remember, so not fair," he grumbled.
Rose, Charlotte and I all turned our eyes narrowing and warned in unison, "Emmett!"
Emmett was getting ready to open his mouth again. Rose thwacked him about the back of his head then grabbed his hand and took him upstairs before he got himself into more trouble.
Eleazar offered to be the guinea pig. I used mind reading to find the memory he was willing to lose. We found I can remove memories and recover memories I have removed.
We practised until Edward returned from school. I threw a shield to block him from reading minds so I could explain the story in such a way that he hopefully wouldn't get too angry at Emmett. We retreated to our room. I explained the latest gift. I very carefully prepared Edward reminding him Emmett has no memory of events before showing him what happened. Stalking around the room running his fingers through his hair then pinching the bridge of his nose were the classic Edward stressed out symptoms that surfaced during the memory sharing along with his rumbling growl. He felt anger and frustration at Emmett but also jealously. I was able to use his jealous against him enough to stop him going after Emmett. The conversation, if you can call it that would have had Emmett in stitches had he been able to hear it; we kept to conversing mentally.
"I..." Edward started when he had seen all the events.
"But he doesn't even remember," I cut him off.
"But.." he came back.
"This is Emmett you're talking about. If you tease him for forgetting you'll wind him up; going out in anger will just get him teasing you and wind you up even more," I love him to bits but sometimes he really needs to loosen up!
The rumbling growl at last calmed as I distracted him stroking his arm and recounting the rest of events up to him arriving home. As the growls faded he started purring at the contact. The atmosphere shifted and his thoughts took a different turn. I quickly reminded him that we still had a full house and I didn't want an audience.
Once he had settled down and got his thoughts back to the gift, some benefits occurred to him. Edward jumped on this gift wanting me to remove from his memories of some of the more disturbing thoughts he had unwillingly overheard over the years.
The potential of this power unnerved me. We waited until Carlisle returned home before agreeing to anything. We all discussed the implications of removing memories. It was decided that Edward would ask me to remove a memory by briefly describing it; I would remove the memory but not the request for removal. We hoped this would be a healthier way of removing overheard thoughts rather than just leaving a hole without explanation. I removed some for him but Carlisle insisted we do it gradually and keep a close eye on any side effects it may have.
I imagined a lock on the power so hopefully I don't accidentally use it. I'm really not comfortable with this power. The small consolation is at least I seem to be able to reverse the effect so far.