"I have stood here before inside the pouring rain

With the world turning circles, running around my brain.

I guess I'm always hoping that you'll end this reign,

But it's my destiny to be the queen of pain."

-Alanis Morissette

I howled long, still wondering how I made such a sound. I started to shake, questioning what the hell was happening! My parents looked at me in horror, while Alice and Jasper looked at me with sad eyes.

"Emmett! Get her outside!" My mom screeched at my father. My dad didn't need to move an inch. I fled the room in an instant and headed outside, breaking through the door frame that I didn't fit in.

"Amber!" My dad's voice boomed towards me. I stopped in my tracks suddenly. He came up behind me and started stroking my neck. My thoughts went back to what had happened right before I turned into a monster. This man had been lying to me my entire life! I barked at him and ran across the yard.

"Amber," he pleaded. "Your mother and I love you so, so much... You must see that we only kept this from you because we didn't want you to be sad about Sam and Emily's death."

Hearing their names for the first time made me want to cry. I wondered if they would have been better parents than the people who raised me. They would have never kept such a huge secret from me. Suddenly, Jasper was at my side. He wasn't glaring at me, but instead he had a soft and kind face.

I found myself calming down more as Jasper looked at me. I fell to the ground and felt my anger just slip away. I couldn't explain how relaxed I felt that moment. Mom came skipping over to me with an outfit that was neatly folded. What was going on here?

Before I knew what exactly had happened, I was suddenly small again. I was lying on the ground, as human as can be. And I was naked. Mom handed me my clothes and I realized that everyone else had gone back into the house. I thanked her and slipped the panties, bra, and dress on. I was still calm. My knees felt wobbly. I fell to the ground, almost asleep.

"All right Jasper," my mom hissed. No doubt he could still hear her from inside the house. "Your gift is working a little too well."

I thought she was going to yell at me for getting dirt on my dress, but instead she picked me up and carried me in the house. By the time I was sitting on the couch, I felt normal again. I couldn't bring myself to be angry, yet I wasn't calm either. "What are you doing to me?" I asked Jasper politely.

He chuckled. "I don't know if you par- Emmett and Rosalie have explained this to you, but some of us vampires possess gifts. I can control people's emotions. In fact, right now I'm keeping you at a normal level. Though I can tell you wish to be rather furious."

I nodded but sunk back in the couch, trying not to cry. My entire life was a lie. And why the hell was I just a wolf?

"Amber." My mother called for my attention. I slowly lifted my head to look at her across the room. "Now that you're less frantic... please, let us explain to you what happened, okay? We want you to know everything." Dad appeared at her side and held her hand.

The next three minutes was a complete roller coaster for me. I felt like sobbing when I learned how my real mother had been killed. But then also warmed by how Sam had tried so vigorously to save her. My anger reached it's high when my dad told what he had done to Sam. Yet, love was complicated. Perhaps, if I were in that situation, I'd do the same thing. My heart almost melted from the love I heard in my mother's voice as she described me as a baby.

"There you were," she sighed happily. "The most beautiful girl in the world. A gift that must have been sent from the Heavens, you were. Your eyes captivated me. I couldn't follow Sam's orders to hand you over to Leah, I had fallen in love with you." If she could cry, she'd be sobbing right now. Tears were coming out of my eyes.

"Leah?" I asked quietly. They hadn't mentioned her in the story they told me.

"Leah was your mother's cousin. They were sort of close, you could say. I'm sorry, baby," mom came over and wrapped her arms around me.

I didn't hug her back. I simply asked her if she knew what had just happened to me. The answer was very odd, I must say. Sam was part of a pack... a pack of shape shifters. Most of the times, girls don't phase into wolves. I was the exception, along with this infamous Leah. But since I was surrounded with so many vampires, my instinct was to phase to protect myself. I sobbed when my mother told me that I would turn into that creature whenever I got very angry.

"Soon enough you'll learn to control your anger, though." Alice came over and started rubbing my back soothingly. "And then, if you so please, you can stop phasing forever."

I growled unintentionally at her. "There's not silver lining to this. I turn into an abominable and carnal beast!"

"It's not so bad, Am." Dad came and crouched in front of me at the couch. He had a goofy smile on his face. "You're practically immortal! You have amazing strength, speed, and agility! Not to mention that you get to live forever."

"Emmett," Mom hissed at him. He turned to her and picked her up in his arms.

"Come on, Rose. Lighten up, baby." He teased. Her face didn't let a smile take over the frown.

"Speaking of such..." Alice interrupted and trailed off. "We did have a reason for deciding to visit, you know."

Mom jumped out of dad's arms and approached Alice. "Is everyone all right?" She sounded all right. Who was she inquiring about.

Alice's face heartbroken. Jasper came along side her and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "It's about Nessie," he said with no emotion.

Mom's eyes widened and dad caught significance in the conversation as well. "What's wrong with Nessie, Alice?"

"The Volturi are coming to Washington to check up on her. And I had a vision... they want to experiment with her... figure out if she's fertile," she spoke icily.

Both my parents looked horrified. "What can we do to help her?" Asked my father.

"Well... as you can imagine, none of us are going to let Nessie be taken away," Jasper spoke now. "We're expecting a fight. And we need numbers... I've even got Peter coming. It's going to be a huge fight," he sighed.

Mom and dad exchanged glances. "What about Amber? We can't just leave her here in the jungle..."

"Bring her with. She doesn't have to fight with us," said Alice.

I took this all in. My parents might be leaving? To go fight? Fight who? As mad as I was at them right now, I wouldn't let them be harmed. "Mom, who's Nessie?" I found myself speaking before I thought. "Why do we have to fight for her?"

Mom was about to speak, but Alice held up an envelope. "Here's some pictures" She handed the envelope to mom.

Alice took a seat to the right of me, and my mother to the left. She opened the envelope and picked up the first picture. "Renesmee..." she trailed off. She handed me the picture. I gasped. This woman was beautiful. More stunning than mother! She had bronze colored curls that flowed down to her backside. Beside her was a dark man, his arm wrapped around her waist securely. They looked at each other in the picture. A blind man could see that these two were in love. "How is she?" Mom asked Alice.

"She was doing quite well before this Volturi situation came up. Her and Jacob are engaged," she smiled.

"Already?" Mother sighed.

"Well, Nessie was full grown by the time she was seven. That's when her and Jacob fell in love... It's been nine years. They've been holding off getting the wedding for years. Nessie kept hoping that you two would come back," she said sadly. "Her father is practically forcing her to keep her virtue until she's married, of course. It's been hard for those two."

Mom frowned. "I feel terrible," she said. "I missed all those precious years with her." She pulled out the next picture and smiled.

Alice laughed, "I figured I'd bring this one for laughs."

Mom handed the picture to me. In it were three women and four men. I almost didn't recognize my own parents along all the others. They were dressed in such goofy clothes. "Mom!" I exclaimed, shocked that mother would be caught dead in that outfit. "What are you wearing?"

Both women giggled like girls. "Oh, Amber, the 80's did that to us. Trust me, it was very fashionable at the time." I shook my head, then focused in on the others in the picture.

I pointed at the small, dark haired girl. "That's you Alice," I smiled, then pointed out another. "And there's Jasper!" I giggled at what they were wearing and how their hair was styled. "Who are these other three though?"

"The man with the red hair is Edward. He's Nessie's dad. The other two are Esme and Carlisle. They were parent figures, in a way," my mom explained to me.

"They're all beautiful..." I trailed off as mom pulled out the next one. In this picture there were eight people. They were all wearing normal clothes and had normal hair-do's. Alice and Jasper were in in. Along with Esme, Carlisle, and Esme. Even Nessie and Jacob were included. I found myself surprised to remember all their names. There was a female with Edward that I didn't recognize, though. "Who's she?"

"Bella," said Alice. "She's new to the family. She's Edward's mate and Nessie's mother." Now that she mentioned it, I could see all the similarities.

Another picture was pulled out. I counted out nine men. There was only one female in the picture. None of the men had shirts on and wore denim shorts. A few were shoving food down their throats, while one or two held up bunny ears behind others' heads. I laughed at that. They all had dark skin, hair, and eyes. They kind of looked like me. Especially the female... We looked a lot alike. "Is this Emily?" I found myself choking up.

Alice rubbed my shoulder. "No, that's Leah. And this is the wolf pack we told you about. There's Jacob, Embry, Quil, Brady, Collin, Delsin, Elan, Pat, Takoda, and Leah," she pointed to each member as she spoke their name.

"And they're all shape shifters like me?" I asked, hesitantly.

"Yes, Jacob's their alpha now. They protect La Push and cities nearby from danger," Alice explained. Mom pulled out the last picture in the envelope.

It was only two people. A man and a woman. The woman had scars running down the entire left side of her face and disappeared into the dress she was wearing. She was wearing a white and poofy gown with a veil on top. There was a big lump coming from her stomach, and she had one of her hands resting on it. It was a wedding photo. The man had her pulled into a hug, and they were looking at the camera with cheesy smiles. You could tell that they would much rather be looking at each other.

"This is Sam and Emily on their wedding day. It took almost two months before you were born," said Alice quietly. I ripped the photo from my mother's hands and held it close to me. My mother and father. I wanted to cry.

"Please excuse me," I said politely and stood up. I ran past my dad with the picture in my hand and outside where it was now raining. I decided to leave the photo on the back porch so it wouldn't get soaked. I ran far into the forest, running as fast as my mom and dad would. I couldn't tell if I was crying, because of the water that was pouring down on my head. My legs felt weak from my crushed spirit, but I began to climb the tree dad and I had been on earlier. I climbed for minutes before reaching the canopy. I through myself on top of the tree and started sobbing. You could probably hear me for miles. I felt like a little girl, screaming and crying so loudly. But I didn't care. My heart felt heavy and I couldn't get my legs to move.

I was paralyzed with distress. It took all my strength to crawl myself at the edge of the branch I was resting on. I didn't even think before throwing myself to the ground. I flew hundreds of feet, hoping that I could end my pain with physical pain instead. Never would I imagine myself giving up my life. I had read about it in many books... people killing themselves. Who would know I would be so selfish?

I hit the ground with a thump. I heard several things crack, but then I felt them rearranging themselves together again. I was immortal now. Of course I couldn't die.

I was hit with a wave of realization. Would Sam and Emily, wherever they were, be watching me now? Would they be disappointed at what I had done? Was I worrying them? I got to my feet and looked at the wet sky. "If you can hear me," I whispered ever so silently. "I love you. And I can't kill myself over what happened. Emmett and Rosalie love me and I love them."

Thunder cracked and I took that as a sign that they heard me and that they loved me too. I ran back to the house, smiling widely. My parents were standing on the back porch, looking worried out of their minds. I ran into their arms and apologized over and over.

"It's all right," said mother.

I looked up at both of them in a hug. "When are we leaving to Washington?"