"Olivia, darling, it's Shania Twain calling..." a manly voice breathed into my ear. I pulled the bed covers up higher over my head and curled my body into a ball. I refused to get out of bed. The cover hid me from the annoying person trying to wake me up. I mumbled incoherent words, as someone began lightly shaking me from my slumber sleep. "Come on, it's time to feel like a woman!" I heard the snickers of the culprit. I opened my eyes into a squint to see who the idiot was. I should have known… I glared up at Jay whose head was peeking under the cover with a cheesy smile. I couldn't help but laugh. Though, I hated being woken up by someone other than myself. I pushed his head away, as I groaned out of annoyance. He was never going to let that one go.

With another groan, I fought the tangled covers off me, kicking the white sheets down around my feet and stretched out in bed.

Then it all hit me, the headache, the feeling of the excessive drinking. Why did I do it? It must have been at least 11am as we had to leave the hotel for the next show. I dragged myself over to the dressing table mirror and to see the damage of the night before. I actually would have laughed if this was someone else's reflection. My hair stuck up in every direction possible, I was semi naked in my underwear. I fumbled around my handbag for some pills to take the headache away. Before I could ask Jay what the hell happened last night, a awful, actual disgusting stench hit my nose.

"It stinks of sick. Who the actual fuck, was sick in here Jay!" I was beyond annoyed. The nerve of some people, this wasn't even my own room! It's a hotel. I spun round to face the bemused Jay.

"Um, You"

"Me?" It was a rhetorical question obviously but I narrowed my eyes at him before smelling my own breath. Christ, I nearly passed out from that! "Ew! What did I do? How bad was I? Seriously, Jay? " Somehow, my voice sounded pleading, like I was about to get on my knees and beg him for answers.

"I don't think you wanna know. You really can't remember?" Jay asked whilst walking over where I stood. I shook my head silently whilst holding my head. "Well, you flipped out at Melina, I thought you were going to throw a bottle at her head, then you stormed off, well you sort of waddled your way outside, where Adam, the saviour, came to find you, and then well, apparently you were.." Jay scratched the back of his blondish head with amused look on his face, okay, so something must have gone down between me and his best friend and he knew! This was embarrassing… This was bad…

"You tried to kiss Adam and you tried to get him butt naked woman! But he pushed you away but you threw up on him instead…"

I stood there, gobsmacked. No, did I really try and kiss Adam? I did believe it as he was hotter than hell itself but really? But I knew I wouldn't have tried to get naked with him, I never. I felt myself begin to panic inside, the memories. We stood in silence, as we were both deep in thought. I tried to remember hard going over and over the night, remembering the small details. Even though I was that drunk, my gut knew that I wouldn't try and have sex with him, I just knew it because… Then I remembered. The silence, the bed, his breath, his smell… I didn't realise it was me who made the noise as I breathed in astonished. "He also told me that something happened to you when you were younger, Olivia, I want to know" He sounded so sincere, maybe one day I would tell Jay but not now. Not when Adam promised me he wouldn't even mention it to someone else. I was furious, hurt and damn right angry…did I mention angry?

How could he? I did no such thing. Jay and I looked at each other at the moment, both having completely different looks on our faces. I took a step closer to Jay, ignoring the fact I had sick breath.

"Well, you can tell your friend Adam that he was the one who tried to kiss me! Get his fucking facts straight, that arsehole! And tell him to never come near me again!" With that I shoved Jay out of my way, grabbing my towel on the way and stormed into the bathroom slamming the door with some force. I swear I saw some of the paint work off the ceiling fall down. What a two faced dick! And I was beginning to like the man after I shared with him about my life.

I re-opened the door quickly to see Jay retreating towards the room door looking somewhat shocked.

"Oh and let's be quite Frank here, even though I don't have a freaking clue who Frank is…But I do not want to see Adam butt naked, Thankyou very much!"

I was currently waiting outside the Diva's allocated changing room. Inside was an actual mess. We had been in there for atleast 3 hours and clothes had been thrown about the place. We had no furniture to sit on, so we had to make do with our suitcases or in Melina's case, a stolen chair from the Men's changing room nextdoor. The whole Smackdown rooster was trying to stay out of the crew's way as it was the TV tapings tonight for Friday Night Smackdown. The night I was making my debut in the WWE. I was hung over, angry and nervous. Not a great combination on my first day. In my short denim shorts, and my cropped Foo Fighters t-shirt, I kicked on the door again. I heard Katy Perry's 'Teenage Dream' blasting behind the door. I rolled my eyes. I stood there with a tray full of cakes and fatty foods for the girls. I as the "newbie" had been sent on "food scranning" as they all called it. The arena cateering had put on an 'all you can eat buffet' I was spoilt for choice.

"I heard the strawberry tart is nice" I looked around to the voice and saw Chris with a smug look on his face. I chuckled to myself at the double meaning. I pulled a face when he took one of the chocolate cupcakes from one of the 6 plates. My favourite!

"Oh yeah, I'm sure you know a lot about tarts" I was pleased with my quick retort back to him. He looked amused to.

"Oh how I missed you in the car today..." I rolled my eyes. He refered to how I travelled with Barbie and Melina as I had chose to travel with them instead of the 3 musketeers, Jay, Chris and him. I had politely declined Chris's offer to travel with them and was surprised to hear that somehow he was still unaware of the situation of me and Adam but I was not being in the same car with him, when he found out!

"Yeah, look Chris, just get to the point. Go on, start teasing me" He chuckled to himself. Before grabbing something else off a different plate, a cheese sandwich. Well, he is welcome to them. He stuffed it in his mouth with one bite. "I'm not actually. Though Jay and Adam did blow up in the car" I raised an eyebrow questioningly. "They thought I was asleep but Jay was pretty pissed off, with Adam for chatting bullshit and with you because apparently you won't tell him something..."

"Oh right. Well they're big boys, they'll sort it out. But I'll talk to Jay though" I felt bad that I had caused best friends to fight, and well even though I was close with Jay, I just couldn't talk about this.

"Hey Michelle. Er, I'll catch you later, Liv" I nodded whilst stuffing a strawberry tart in my mouth. Chris made his exit as we were interrupted finally, by Michelle opening the door to let me in. I stalked into the room, seeing what nonsense the girls were talking about now.

"So Barbs, what's going on with you and South African?" I smiled at Melina's question whilst carefully putting the food in middle of the floor and sitting down cross legged next to Barbie. I heard a groan from the blonde diva.

"Well, I thought it was just a one night thing, but he, he's sending me kinky texts." We all laughed. South African, was Paul, Justin Gabriel. I had been filled in with the situation between these two. "Like get this, 'Just wanted to let you know, you've found your Ken, Barbie" They had been seeing each other on and off, and when I say 'seeing' I mean naked. The girls erupted in laughter.

"He must be gagging for some more Barbie"

"I think he's sweet!"

"He needs to stop seriously!" I laughed at Barbie. I opened my suitcase and pulled out my new ring attire. It was a deep blue crop top with black straps, with tiny black metallic shorts. I wore my long hair loose down my back. It was nothing special as I wasn't the girly diamond type. I stripped off my normal clothes and got changed into my ring gear with my boots, which were actually biker boots. I carefully pulled my knee pads up securely, and fastened the laces of my boots. I would be teaming with Barbie tonight against Michelle and fellow English babe, Layla.

"I heard that John wasn't complaining about you last night either, Mel!" I heard Michelle throw out there in the conversation.

"Well the way this girl can bend-

"Ew, Layla!" All the girls said in unison. I shook my head listening to the graphic conversation. I felt uncomfortable and had to get out. I had to excuse myself before the conversation turned to me.

I found myself standing in the middle of the ring, which had just been set up for tonight's taping. The ring always looks so much bigger in person than on TV. I looked around the empty arena which could easily hold at least 10,000 fans. I just got chills thinking about what the atmosphere will be like in less than an hour. The sound technicians we're playing around with the PA system. I imagined there were thousands of fans jumping out of their seats, chanting my name. The ring was like my husband, I was physically and emotionally in love with it. The feeling you get, you just know this is for you, I was born for it. I began running the ropes, loosening up my muscles ready for my match tonight. I couldn't wait. Jay always told me, the moment you step out of that curtain, you're in a whole different world. I had done other shows infront of crowds no more than 50, but being in the World Wrestling Entertainment, is a totally different matter.

"Want a match?"

"Fuck you" I spat out. I stopped in my tracks and turned to face the new comer in the ring. There Adam stood with his ring gear on, and a Rated R t-shirt. He wore his trademark goofy smile, but I did not smile back, merely glared at him. I waited for him to try and explain himself.

"Look-

"No! You look Adam" I cut him off before he made up some phoney excuse. "You embarrassed me. You hurt me! I don't know what you're problem is! Maybe you should stock up on tissue to wipe the bullshit that comes out of your mouth!" He had such a nerve.

"I'm sorry, I'm an ass, I know. But I didn't want Jay to know what happened last night" He came closer to where I was stood. I folded my arms across my chest and scolded him with my eyes. I didn't know what it was about this boy, but he made me defensive, worse, he made me care.

"Nothing did happen last night that is the point! You tried to kiss me for heavens sake" I poked my finger hard in his chest, trying to get the message across. "I'm sorry that's such a disgusting thing" I said sarcastically. "Did you think trying to distract him with telling him something happened to me when I was younger? You're sick!"

The way he was talking made me thing I was the most horrible creature on the planet. I had enough with his crap, I shouldn't even care. I was nothing anyway. I brushed past him attempting to leave, but he grabbed my wrist pulling me back to face him.

"Let me go!" I didn't realise I had shouted until crew members looked up concerned.

"I didn't mean it like that" He let go off my wrist. I pushed him with force making him stumble. "Ok, I deserve that" He rubbed his chest obviously hurting. I pushed him again.

I attempted to push him again but he grabbed me by both wrists. I felt his hands move around my stomach, grabbing me up into his arms. He threw me over his shoulder. I screamed in protest and kicked around attempting to get his hands off me. "Will you stop pushing me?"

"You're a dick!" I continued thrashing around until he put me down. Instead, he sat me down on top of one of the turnbuckles. I suppose his plan was so we could be eye to eye, face to face.

"You know what actually hurts me the most, is that I let you in! I don't even know you, but something made me trust you, and it was not the alcohol. It was you. All you. But I guess you're just like every other man."

"I'm sorry Liv! I don't know why I made up that shit. I guess, I don't need Jay on my back. I didn't tell him anything else, I wouldn't Olivia, I promise. But tell me why do you care so much?" He looked me dead in the eye. I could feel the intensity of the stare. He knew how to get all the right answers out of me.

I averted my eyes to the floor. How could I answer that, when I don't even know myself?

"I don't know and it scares me!" I sounded like I was talking to myself than to Adam. I looked at him as we both were content with thought. "Why can't you just leave me alone?" I said in a whisper.

"Because I want you to let me in, I need you to let me in!" He brushed his hand on the side of my cheek. I leant into it, as warmth spread across my cheek. This wasn't good. My head snapped up before it went any further.

"But I'm not good for you! You deserve better than me" I said it plain and simple and meant it. "I was told nobody wanted me, and you proved that point Adam by saying that shit to Jay." I slid down from the top rope back onto my feet. I exited the ring with no second look back. I heard Adam call my name, tell me to wait. Well I've been waiting all my life. The doors were about to open and I needed to get my head back together before I fell apart, again. That's when I began running towards the back.

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