Infirmary

"Ow…"

Evie was confused… that wasn't her voice. She opened her eyes and was met with the sight of a high-vaulted ceiling and a collection of hastily-constructed beds. Her whole body hurt, and it sounded like the girl in the next bed was in a similar position, so this must be the… well, where the HELL was she?

"Where am I?" she croaked.

"I don't know, but there must be a name for it," the girl in the next bed said.

"Do you see this gash! I want more than one bandaid!" complained a voice down the way. The girl seemed to be arguing with a sign, which happily advertised, "Only one bandaid per customer!"

Evie blinked and spotted a sign above the only available exit. It said "Infirmary". She had never heard that word before… was it French?

"What happened?" asked Evie. "I remember pink, fuzzy… something. And there were teeth. Lots of teeth…" she could only remember the event in flashes.

"Did you pet a plunny?" asked the girl in the next bed.

"I must have."

"Me too. They're too sparkly to resist. Like Edward," she sighed.

"Oh, finally! I thought I was going to be the only one!" exclaimed Evie.

"Me too! My roommate seems to be into wizards. Kept complaining about not having a wand," said the girl.

"My roommate has a mop," Evie muttered.

"That's… strange. I'm Liane, by the way."

"I'm Evie. Is your roommate into Legsie too?"

"Who?" queried Liane.

"Exactly! Who are all these people, anyway?" Evie wondered.

"I have no idea. My roommate talks about Potter. I don't get it. What's so great about a long wand?"

"Totally! Besides, Edward could totally take him in a fight."

"He wouldn't stand a chance with that puny stick he calls a wand!"

"I know, right? You know what? WE should be roommates! We're the only sane ones in this castle!"

"We TOTES should! How do we do that? Is there like an RA?" Liane wondered aloud.

"I don't think so… I guess we should find a front office or something?" Evie suggested. She rose from the bed and checked herself over for any major injuries. Nothing seemed broken, and she wasn't bleeding, so she deemed herself healthy.

"FABOOSH!" Liane declared. "But I guess I should go get one of those bandaids first. My arm has a cut on it." Together they walked over to the medicine cabinet. Inside, there was a rather large box of dinosaur bandaids underneath the "Only one bandaid per customer" sign. Liane shrugged and took one, placing it on her cut.

Five seconds passed, and then, "RAWR!"

Liane and Evie both screamed and nearly jumped out of their skins. "What was that?" Evie exclaimed.

"I don't know… I…" Liane looked down at her cut. Although the bandaid hadn't covered more than a fraction of it, miraculously there was no longer a cut there! "It's gone! These dinosaur bandaids are magic!" she said happily.

Together, the exited the infirmary, having both learned a new word! "Do you know where we're going?" Evie asked. Lianne looked lost, and just shrugged. They picked a direction and walked, hoping that a kindly sparkling stranger would step into their path and help them. And maybe make out with them.

Lost in this little fantasy, the girls didn't notice Lady Ivy cross into their path. "Isn't it a little late for you little mousies to be out of your little housies?" the woman practically sang.

"Umm… we were just…" began Evie.

"Looking for…" Liane continued.

"Your beds?" prompted Lady Ivy. From down the hall they heard the echo of a crack, and a long, sinister moo. They shuddered and shared a glance. Perhaps they could request a roommate change in the morning.

"Yes, our beds, I guess," Evie said shakily.

Lady Ivy grinned, which, rather than reassuring them, instead provoked a fear neither had experienced before. "The dormitories are that-a-way," Lady Ivy informed them, gesturing in a general leftward direction.

"Yes, t-thank you, Lady Ivy," stuttered Liane.

"Would you like a plunny to escort you to your beds? Just to ensure you don't get lost, of course," asked Lady Ivy.

This was simply too much. "No!" Evie exclaimed, grabbing Liane's wrist, and dragging her away down the hall. Behind them, they heard Lady Ivy cackle.

It was only when Evie found her room again, and deadbolted the door (no more plunny incidents for her tonight!) that Evie drew a full breath again. She crept into her room and into her bed, and spared a glance for her wacky roommate, who was cuddled up amidst her Legolas sheets, snuggling with the Legolas-Mop.

What a freak…