Thank you muchly for the feedback, it is always appreciated! Continuation of the first season, this chapter covers the back 9 episodes. I put Funk and Theatricality in the correct order (not the order the episodes aired) because it made more sense for my narrative… you'll see. Next part won't come until at least after Tuesday (when the last episode of the segment airs). It's going to be difficult to keep up with the characterization since certain characters *cough* Finn *cough* can't seem to stay very consistent.
Between the Lines
He thinks they might be dating.
Monday morning his phone rings at 6:30AM. "I need a ride to school," her voice chirps on the other end. She says more things, explains that one of her dads' cars is broken and that her street is too narrow for the bus, but he's already drifted back to sleep with the phone pressed to his ear.
He's about to turn into McKinley's parking lot when his phone rings again. Oops. When he finally makes it to her house, 20 minutes late, he sees two cars in the driveway, but he doesn't think anything of it. Rachel slips into the passenger door kisses him on the cheek and hands him a coffee in one of those disposable Starbuck's cup like thingies with a triangle shaped blueberry muffin. She calls it a scone but he knows better.
At school she follows him to his locker and hands him a day planner. He doesn't know what he's supposed to do with it, but he smiles at her and thanks her before tucking it into his locker. She's talking to him about book readings and local theater performances and other stuff but he's not listening.
Ever since he found out about the whole baby thing, Rachel's different. She's all intense and crazy again and he's not sure if he likes it.
Rachel's still talking, her lips moving a mile a minute. "I mean now that you're not seeing anyone, we can spend more time together, right?"
He looks at her. Her hair is parted on the side today and she looks really pretty. He tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and smiles. Across the hall he sees that Quinn is watching.
On Tuesday he remembers to pick Rachel up.
It's on Wednesday when Finn realizes that he and Rachel are in a relationship. She calls him after school every night and asks him what he plans on wearing the next day. The following morning he notices that her knee socks always match his shirt. She tucks herself under his arm when they're walking down the hall and on Thursday he sees that his picture is tapped in her locker door.
Quinn notices too. She throws a slushie in Rachel's face before the homeroom bell when everyone is in the hallway to see. Finn helps wipe the ice off her cheeks and then checks to make sure Quinn is watching before he drops his lettermen jacket across her shoulders. She wears the jacket everyday and it's so big on her that it drops past the hem of her skirt.
Still, Finn doesn't show up to their dates. Most of the time it's an accident and he doesn't even know that they're planned, but sometimes he misses them on purpose. She calls him afterwards and most of the time he apologizes, but sometimes he doesn't even answer the phone. In the morning she confronts him and he kisses her. Usually the hallways are crowded, when everyone can see. He assumes that's what she wants. She wants everyone to know that they're a couple and that they make out and do "couple like" things. People only ever use him anyway.
It's not that he doesn't like Rachel. She cheers him up and brings him cookies before basketball games. She's also a pretty good kisser. He's just not ready to get serious with someone, he guesses. He thinks maybe he has trust issues but isn't sure why.
Rachel must notice too because one day she asks him for the truth. "Are you over Quinn Fabray?"
He hates himself when she asks him, but then he answers truthfully. "Of course." He's over Quinn; he's been over her for a long time, since before the baby even. It was habit that kept them together.
It's the baby that he can't get off his mind. He spent months agonizing over her. Sleepless nights haunted by what would happen to her. Sometimes he imagined the future. Ten years down the line when he was older and ready to be a father he would find her and would be a part of her life. He would take Drizzle to the park and push her on a swing and spoil her with ice cream. Sometimes Rachel was there too. She would braid her hair and teach her lullabies and show tunes.
But that's all gone now, and nobody seems to care.
He tries to tell Rachel this but it's like she's not even listening. She gets caught in the magic of the relationship and is too busy planning their lunch dates to care. He thinks he needs to be alone for a while but he likes her too much to break up with her. So he just let's things continue. Maybe it's a mistake.
He really liked her. She's haunted by it.
Maybe she was a bit insensitive to his feelings, but she wanted to be with him so badly and when the opportunity presented itself, she took it. She blames Hugh Grant entirely for her over the top antics.
But he was a jerk. She deserves better. She deserves the perfect male lead. The one she's been craving since glee club was first assembled. Finn was an interesting interpretation for the role, but Jesse St. James is the epitome of a male lead. And he appreciates her talents. And he wants to be with her.
But he really liked her.
Her phone buzzes and she know its Jesse, probably trying to work his way into her bedroom again. She really likes Jesse. They share the same passion and drive and dreams. He's absolutely perfect for her. But when they talk about music and Broadway, Jesse's answers are always something like "obviously" or "well, duh!" or "if it were any other way it would be a travesty to the stage!" And she appreciates his support, she does, but she misses that dumbstruck face staring back at her telling her he has no idea what she's talking about.
They watched Chicago together once, her and Finn. It was before he knew the truth about the baby and before she made a fool of herself trying to trap him in a relationship. Mr. Schue had assigned some songs with more of a jazz beat and Finn had asked her for help on his performance. She considered showing him Cabaret, since they had rehearsed scenes for it, but she knew better. At the end of the film he simply said, "That was awesome." Something about being there with him when he discovered it for the first time made her feel special.
He's waiting for the right person.
She feels compelled to perform the song Somewhere (A Place for Us) from West Side Story so she posts it on MySpace because she's been falling behind.
Jesse will think the song is about them and their love. He'd be wrong.
He spots him during the pep assembly and he panics. It's quiet in the choir room and he hopes he can hang low for a while.
"You're hiding from someone."
She knows him too well. Or at least she's used to people hiding from her. That makes more sense because he used to hide from her all the time. Only when she was Crazy Rachel, never when she was Awesome Rachel. He never sees Rachel as crazy anymore though. She's like all awesome all the time. Well, except when she's with Jesse St. Jerk.
"Is this because of me and Jesse?" She demands. "Because if we're making you uncomfortable, I'm sorry but you're just going to have to deal with it."
"No," he flinches because it hurts. But he deserves it. "Look. Do you ever feel guilty about your mom?"
She seems to relax for the first time in forever. For the past few weeks she's either been trying to force them into a relationship or trying to bite his head off or trying to rub her new boyfriend in his face. "What?"
"Do you ever feel guilty? For like… replacing her?"
"I still don't understand."
Finn sighs because he realizes this is something he needs to get off his chest. He's always keeping things bottled up because he doesn't know how to just… express it.
"My mom is dating Kurt's dad," he finally says. "And he wants to take me to football games and play catch and I feel so bad because I never got to do any of those things with my dad," his voice starts to break because he's crying and it's so embarrassing. "You know?"
She holds his hand in hers just like she used to. Back when they were friends and everything was cool between them. "It's different," she assures him. "Your father will always be with you but my mother was never there."
"So you don't even think of her?"
"Why should I? She didn't want to be a part of my life and I feel like looking for her would be cheating both me and my dads." She shakes her head because she realizes she's making it about herself and he thinks it's really cool that she's taking the time to care about him. "Don't deprive yourself from happiness, from a father because he can't be there, he probably wouldn't want that."
"That's what my mom says. That like I didn't know him and that I can't know what he would have wanted." He feels down. Like really down. Like if he thinks about this anymore he might start crying in front of her, which would be totally embarrassing.
"You want your mom to be happy right?" She places her hand on his cheek and his eyes burn because he's so mad at himself for everything right now. For how he treated Rachel, for how he treated his mom, for how he's treating Burt.
"Of course."
"Then give Mr. Hummel a chance."
So he goes home and when he sees Burt he doesn't get mad or freak out, he listens to him. He can't change what's happened to his father, but he can't punish him and his mom for it either.
He can't keep on punishing himself all the time.
She realizes that she can be a little extreme at times. When she was ranked so low on the Glist she was very disappointed in herself but more importantly she was ready to campaign for the placing she rightly deserved. It's her burden… her drive to be the best at everything, her ambition that steamrolls over anything in its path. She never intended to hurt anybody. It was just a harmless music video… to make everyone think she had three boyfriends. Sure she knew that Noah wouldn't understand the "art" of her film but would never take it personally. And as a fellow star on the rise she was sure that Jesse would be unhappy by his reduced role but was sure that by showing him the edited version that only featured him on lead and in extreme close up (of his good side no less) that all would be forgiven. She never expected Finn to be so hurt though. She had only asked him to help her with a project as her co-captain.
It's not like Finn had a right to complain. Just two weeks ago he had broken up with her so that he could date two cheerleaders, all for status no less. There was absolutely no reason why she should feel guilty at all.
But when he asks her how she could do this to him, she feels awful. So when she sees him at his locker she decides that she's going to apologize.
"Look I'm sorry," he says before she can take a breath to speak. "I kind of jumped down your throat in there and I guess I might have overreacted."
She narrows her eyes. "You did," she agrees.
"It's just when you asked me to do that stupid video…" she gasps because how dare he! "I mean your really cool music video," better, "I thought that maybe it meant that you liked me best. That you wanted me to be your boyfriend."
"But I'm with Jesse," she says. "You know that."
"I know," he says sadly.
She hates that he does this to her. It's not her fault that he broke up with her, they'd still be together if he hadn't and she wouldn't have even had to make that stupid video... she means artistic tribuite.
"I guess I owe you an apology too then," she says in spite of herself because she still doesn't think she's done anything wrong. "I didn't mean to give you the wrong impression."
"Yeah," he says, but then he begins shaking his head and closing his eyes like he's thinking really hard. Her pulse begins to race because Finn rarely puts his foot down. When he gets all determined and motivated she can't help but find it… kind of sexy.
"Listen, Rachel, you know I like you, okay? I can't just pretend that I don't." He takes a step towards her and she has to close her eyes because she knows what's coming next. "I don't think we can be friends anymore."
She has to blink a few more times to regain her composure and she lifts her chin high because she doesn't need him anyway. "Fine."
He promised that he was going to get some distance from her but he can't help it. When he sees her sulking in the corner of the choir room insisting she needs medical attention but her dads are unable to get her to a physician until Friday, he thinks whatever, it's Wednesday, but then he remembers this is Rachel. So he offers to drive her because he's stuck on level twelve of Halo anyway and is getting really frustrated at getting vaporized every five seconds.
But as the week goes on he realizes that Rachel needs someone in her corner. She needs a friend and he's the only person in school dumb enough to do it. So he decides to be her friend again and he tries to make her feel better. As usual, he messes up though.
He's getting good at playing the piano. Not like playing chords or different parts at once, but at like tinkering with the notes until they sound like songs he recognizes.
"Hey," Rachel says sitting on the bench beside him.
"Hey," he can't help but smile. "Sorry for taking you to Sean's yesterday. I told my mom about it and she said it was like really insensitive and put you in an uncomfortable situation or something."
"No," she shakes he head. "I needed a kick in the butt and Sean's inspiring story really made me think about how lucky I am. Here I thought I had nothing left to live for because I couldn't sing anymore. People have only ever wanted me for my voice," she says sadly and he thinks that sucks because he thinks Rachel is really awesome even when she isn't singing. He wishes that he knew how to write poetry or something or knew how to play the piano as good as Billy Joel so he could serenade her some more.
"I'd still be your friend," is all he can come up with though.
She smiles at him with that big smile that lights up her eyes. "I appreciate that."
It get's quiet for a while because that's what friendly people do… sit in awkward silence.
"What were you playing?" She finally asks.
"I was just playing around," he says shyly because he doesn't really know how to play or if the song is in the right key or anything.
"Can I listen?"
So he starts hitting the keys that he had memorized before and he hits the wrong note a couple of times but finally he finds the right pitch.
"One love, one life, one need in the night."
It feels like it's been forever since he's heard that voice and he can't help but grin. "Your voice is back!"
"Yeah, I guess it is." She still seems sad though and he can't imagine why. She's got her voice back, that's all she's ever wanted.
He wants to cheer her up so he just starts babbling, "That's Sean's favorite song. We used to listen to it all the time when he was helping me on my math homework but I was always too busy using my calculator to write boobs…"
"I have an idea," she says suddenly with her Rachel Berry Crazy Eyes fully restored.
So he drives her to Sean's house with the strict orders to return in exactly 45 minutes and when he returns Sean's mother tells him how Rachel is giving him voice lessons.
He writes this down on a sheet of paper titled "Reasons Why Rachel Berry is Awesome" because the next time she asks, he's going to have the words to prove it.
She feels good. Jesse was back and her boyfriend and helping her through a monumental experience in her life. Sure she never thought much of her birth mother before. She had two loving parents and her family was complete. But when Finn had asked her about her mom, she couldn't get it off of her mind.
Jesse had been surprisingly supportive through the whole ordeal, even insisting that off-Broadway performers were just as credible as the real deal when a lead indicated that the understudy for Grizabella in the Columbus Theatre performance of Cats was registered in the surrogate database. She had felt so completely disheartened by the news.
She knows what she's doing though, and she's going to find her. Even at the risk of being the progeny of a fry cook, or worse a sports enthusiast.
"Are you sure that's a good idea?" He asks her while she's busy reorganizing her school books in her locker.
"What?" She asks, pausing to admire the new photograph of Jesse hanging on the door.
"Your binder says 'The Search for Momma Berry' on the cover, and bellow that are a bunch of pictures of people I don't recognize," he explains.
She looks down at her book and sighs. Obviously he would never appreciate the talents of Bernadette Peters. "It's not a big deal," she reasons.
"But you said you didn't want to meet her."
"Look, Finn. That conversation we had a few weeks ago really got me thinking. I have a mother who's out there and if I didn't try reaching out to her before it's too late, I would never forgive myself. You have Mr. Hummel now to bond with over what kind of grunts to use when you cheer for various sporting events or what kind of junk food you want to clog your arteries with, and I'm really happy for you. But there are some things that a girl just really needs a mother for. Like how to get a boy to like you," she sees him frown and drop his head. "Or how to deal with mean girls or a broken heart."
"You could talk to my mom if you want; she's pretty cool and is always complaining that she doesn't have anyone to talk to about girl stuff like crafts or jerk-ass guys or healthcare." He shakes his head. "I just think you might be making a mistake."
"I appreciate your concern, but you don't have to worry about me." She slams her locker shut and stomps away in her best Rachel Berry fashion.
But when her phone buzzes with Jesse 's message: After school two tickets of admission into the Rachel Barbra Berry Museum. She can't help but think that maybe she's making a mistake.
He's marching around in the Quickie Mart like a man on a mission. Sure Mr. Schue told him and the other guys to ignore what Vocal Adrenaline did to Rachel, but there's only so much singing you can do to stomp the itch he has to kick a chair directly into Jesse's face. He's halfway to the slushy machine when he runs into Rachel forcing a fourth bag of Cheetos into her overflowing basket.
"Hey," he says and he narrows his eyes because she's already opened a bag of Twizzlers and has one hanging out the side of her mouth and it's totally depressing to see Rachel Berry like this.
She pulls the Twizzler out of her mouth and starts staring at him like he's done something wrong. "You can start gloating now if you want."
He pauses because he's not sure what gloating means. Like maybe it could be a goat that glows in the dark or it could be oats that you glue together… and then hurl at Jackass St J-wads face. He wonders whether they sell Elmer's Glue here. ..
"Huh?"
"You were right," she says. He's happy that he's right about something for once, but bummed that she is so sad because of it. "Jesse was just using me this whole time even after everyone had warned me." She shuts her eyes tightly and lifts her chin in that really dramatic Rachel way. "I understand if you don't want to be my friend anymore after what Jesse did to the club."
"What?"
"You said if I let Jesse in and he endangered the group that we wouldn't be friends anymore."
"Yeah," he agrees. But he only said that because he was jealous that she picked Jesse over him to be her boyfriend. "We're a team, Rach we're not going to let them get away with this."
She kisses his cheek. She smells like cherries and chocolate and potato chips and even though she usually smells like soap and flowers he thinks every version of Rachel is just awesome. He wants to hold her and kiss her and prove to her that he would be like ten times better as a boyfriend than Jesse Satan James ever was.
"Mr. Schue's right though. There's no use in playing into Vocal Adrenaline's juvenile games. We're going to wow them with our talent." He nods but he's only half listening because he sees that the orange flavored slushie is getting really low. "Promise me you won't get in to anymore trouble, okay?"
He sees a freshman get a cup and reach for the orange handle. "Sure," he says placing a hand on her cheek, but he's on a mission so he offers her one last smile and then pushes past her.
He grabs the largest cup he can find, gently nudges the freshman away from the machine and fills the cup to the very top.
"Please tell me that's a dye job."
Finn nearly spills the cup into the driver's seat when he spots Puck sitting in the backseat. They're not friends anymore, but drastic times call for drastic measures. A prank war has commenced on him and Puck are the only soldiers good enough for battle.
"One full tube of orange food coloring, orange slushie for taste, and a dollop of self tanner," Finn says proudly because it's like the best idea they've ever had. "He's going to look like an Oompah Loompah."
They drive to Carmel and get there just before midnight when they know rehearsal will be getting out. All the Range Rovers pull out one by one, but he keeps his eyes trained on the door until he spots Jesse with his stupid face and his stupid hair and how could Rachel ever see anything in this loser.
He doesn't go through with it though. He stands in Jesse's face holds the slushie back but he can't go through with it. Rachel's right they don't need to play these stupid games with Vocal Adrenaline. They're going to win because they're better. Besides Jesse is a bigger idiot than he is, letting Rachel get away like that. He actually feels kind of bad for him. So he dumps the slushie on the concrete parking lot, smiles proudly and says, "I'm going to make Rachel forget you ever existed."
Puck thinks it's lame that Finn doesn't man up and make Jesse's face all orange, but he doesn't care because he's going to win Rachel back and he's going to make her proud. Besides, Puck pees on Jesse's door handle, which makes the trip totally worth it.
After Shelby leaves she cries in the choir room. She doesn't understand why everyone that she cares about leaves her. First Finn, then Jesse, and now her own mother? She's toxic.
She's startled though when she sees Finn sitting quietly in the corner, just staring at the floor. "Sorry," she says quickly wiping away the tears because Rachel Berry doesn't cry unless it's called for in the script. "I didn't realize anyone else was here."
"Me either," he says.
"What are you still doing here? Basketball practice let out over three hours ago."
"I don't have anywhere to go."
She doesn't know how to feel; to hear that he could say that to Kurt and expect people to be okay with it. She blames the entertainment industry for being so lenient in male dominant films with such language causing youth to use hurtful words like that so freely because "everybody is doing it." More importantly, she knows that Finn is better than that.
"I just felt that nobody was listening to me," Finn says. "Like I wasn't even there. My mom told me that she's never been so disappointed in me and that I was selfish for ruining our family. But I just felt trapped." He finally meets her gaze. "Do you think that Kurt maybe, might be like… into me? I'm not crazy for thinking that, right?"
Of course he is.
"What makes you say that?" She asks nervously. But then she tells him the truth. How Kurt has always had a misguided crush and how he sabotaged her by dressing her like a sad clown hooker on purpose because he wanted Finn for himself. She tells him he should be flattered really, but she can tell that Finn is just kind of uncomfortable about the whole thing. "You can't just hide from your problems, Finn. You have to talk to your mother. Make her hear you out."
"What are you doing here so late?" He finally asks.
"My moth… Ms. Corchran and I sang a duet," she explains. "Sort of a closure thing."
"This really sucks," he suddenly says standing from his chair. "So much junk is going on with you and with me and we don't even know about it. It's like we're not even friends anymore."
She frowns because he's right. This time last year they didn't even know one another, but over the course of the year she can't imagine how she would have survived without him. Before they met, she was selfish and self centered. She would have driven everyone away from glee club with her overbearing personality.
"You're my dearest friend, Finn," she says. "You'll always be."
He kisses her then and it's unlike any time before. There are no hurdles in their path. No girlfriends, or babies, or doubts, or rival club's male divas. It's just Rachel and Finn. She wonders if this is what it's like to be in love.
But nobody ever really cares about her and she refuses to play the fool again. So she walks away.
He's not sure where they stand. He kissed her and then she kissed him back. That means they're dating, right? Sure he kissed her over a week ago and she ran away so fast a Rachel shaped cloud appeared in his arms, but then she kissed him, so that like evens out.
Maybe he shouldn't have told her he loved her. It's not like he didn't mean it. But maybe he was coming on too strong. He never thought that in relation to Rachel Berry that he would ever be the one to come on too strong. This is the girl who set up a picnic in the auditorium complete with cocktails, when they were still only kind of friends.
He thinks maybe it was also a bad idea to go to the hospital for Quinn and the baby. It's not like he planned on going. And when he looked at Rachel and questioned, "Are you?" She shook her head and told him to go. That was probably a bad idea. He definitely should not have gone.
In a weird way it kind of gave him closure though. Like even though the baby isn't his and never was his, he still cares about her and wants to make sure she's okay. Quinn even offers to let him come see her and hold her if he wants but he's not that okay with the situation. He never actually sees the baby either, he just waits in the lobby with Mr. Schue and the other kids until they hear the news that she's okay and not some weird lizard baby.
Maybe that's why she doesn't stand next to him when the results are announced, because she's made at him for going to the hospital. Or maybe she's just avoiding him because she's too embarrassed for him, since he was a total idiot and told her he loved her even though they're not together or anything.
But then on the bus, even though there are like 20 empty seats, she sits next to him and she holds his hand. He knows he should really be bummed because they lost and the club is over, but he smiles the whole way home.
He's not going to mess things up this time.