Part 3, folks! Boy, I'm uploading this quick, aren't I?

Consideration - Suigintou's POV

I could hear her voice as I approached the hospital window. It always soothed me to hear her singing for me; it made me feel wanted and loved. But, of course she wasn't entitled to know that. I landed on the ledge, the clacking of my boots leeting her know I had arrived to see her. The moonlight and dark sky made her look dead but her eyes were bright and alive.

"Hello again, my angel."

"I've said it to you many times but I'll say it again: I'm not your angel so stop saying that."

I turned away from her and a soft but cold wind brushed my face and ruffled my wings. I folded my arms and turned my gaze to the moon above, my thoughts tracing back to what Shinku had said to she really serious or was she just fooling around? I didn't really know what to think. Shinku and I had been bitter enemies for so long and now she wanted to leave it all behind and start over.

On one hand, it was almost too good to be true - I had secrectly been wanting love and acceptance from someone other than my Medium for so long that the very idea seemed like a foreign concept to me now.
But oh, how I longed and ached for it. To be respected and loved as a sister, to be happy and feel wanted, to be looked up to. I wanted to feel that so badly, it was unreal.

But of course, I have been misunderstood and mistreated as a result of wanting love. Throughout my life,
I have been hated and loathed by those I want to cherish and protect. Why should they be treated any differently? Those dolls should learn and know what pain is, how much it hurts and they should live in eternal sorrow and misery, like I have. It's only fair.

"Shinku... what are you doing?" The wind was my only reply, blowing gently and bitterly in my right eye.

"Suigintou?"

Megu's voice pulled me back around to face her. She pulled herself up and shuffled over, drawing the covers back slightly, then patted the matress, smiling.

I sighed heavily and floated over to her, perching in the spot she'd made for me. The cloth felt warm under my ball-jointed legs and I felt Megu's arm wrap round my shoulders.

"Something is troubling you, Suigintou."

I scoffed. "What makes you say that?"

"The look in your eyes - you seem disgusted about something. This Shinku, perhaps?"

"What of her?"

"So you are troubled."

I sighed again. "She wants to quit fighting with me personally and become friends with me again, that's what, okay? And it makes me sick."

"Surely you should feel happy at the chance to make up with someone you love?"

"Wouldn't you?"

"I'm not the one with the chance, Suigintou."

I turned to face Megu, casting her a confused glance under glaring eyes.

"I don't know how much you hate Shinku and I won't ask, but she is your sister and I think you should make up with her. If she's offering you the chance to forgive her, why not take it? It may never present itself again."

I turned back to the moon. "If Shinku was serious about leaving our quarrels behind, she'd have got down on her knees and begged me. Anyway, you're right about one thing, Megu: you have no clue as to the damage Shinku has done to me. Therefore, do I see any reason to forgive her?"

"Compassion. How do you think Shinku feels about it, Suigintou? She probably knows what she's done so there's no need to hold a grudge, is there?"

"Shinku doesn't have a clue. And there's every right for me to hold a grudge."

"Grudges aren't good for you."

Megu's speech bit into me as she spoke, leaving me feeling more hollow.

"When someone holds a grudge, they do nothing but brood over it until they shift their personality into something different to that person and they become the opposite of what others want them to makes them hate those they hold the grudge against and nothing but revenge and angst builds up until one day, they can't take it and something awful happens to either the person holding the grudge or the one whom the grudge is against and -"

"Enough!" I took off out the window and swooped into the air blindly for a few minutes before coming to a halt in the middle of the moon. I stared up at it once again, her words racing through my head, making my eyes twitch and well up. My fists ached from clutching them in balls so tightly but I didn't care.

It seemed like I was outnumbered; Megu wanted me to forgive and Shinku wanted to forgive. So why was I resisting? Megu was right - I had become the opposite of what I wanted myself to be. I had hoped that by winning the Alice Game, I would be seen as a loved, respected elder sister, just as Father was loved and respected. But I had become a self-centred, arrogant, greedy doll who would kill everyone to achieve my goal: Alice. Alice is perfect in every way. She musn't be greedy, arrogant or self-centred - she should be kind, understanding and trustworthy. Was I capable of becoming Alice anymore? Or was I really just junk? A tear escaped my eye but I hurriedly brushed it away. Of course I could be Alice. I could become Alice. But I had to do something first...

There we go.^^ Did I mention it's fun to write as Suigintou? 8D