ii

At 7:00 AM each school morning, Kyle would wait in his living room for Stan's text message saying, "here." Stan would then proceed to drive him to school and he would ride home with him, unless Stan had football practice.

Usually, they'd exchange pleasantries, listen to music, or not even say anything. Sometimes, Stan would have work to finish and let Kyle drive or vice versa. Sometimes, Stan would insist on quiet so Kyle could hear a song that he liked a lot. And sometimes, one of them would just be pissed and not want to talk about anything.

"You alright, dude?" Stan inquired. "You look tired."

"Yeah, I'm just tired."

Kyle hadn't slept the previous night. In the hours since he had hung up with Stan, he had decided several things.

He had decided that Stan was unquestionably the most important person to him in the world. He was his best friend, and he had always been there for him since he could remember. His parents were far often too consumed with their own lives, but Stan was always on his level. Stan never judged him for being Jewish, for being intelligent, for being a ginger, for being skinny, for being part Jersey, for being sensitive, for… fuck-anything.

Stan had always been cool. Stan was good at sports, maintained decent grades, and had grown into himself well. With football and soccer training, he was muscular but lean. Clean, well kept black hair stuck out from under the familiar blue and red beanie. His eyes were dark blue, and his bone structure showed softly though his clear, healthy skin. No denying it - Stan was handsome. Handsome, logical, understanding; his best friend, his brother, and the person closest to his heart.

So, loving Stan wasn't weird.

"You look like you have a fever too, dude." Stan added at a red light. He leaned over, brushed the red hair out of Kyle's face and placed the back of his palm to his forehead. "You don't feel too warm. You actually feel kinda clammy."

This, however, was weird.

"Maybe you should be a doctor, dude." He chuckled.

"Yeah, right dude." Stan shifted gears and mused.

So, after deciding that he loved Stan, and found Stan attractive, he also made the decision that he wasn't gay.

No. Not at all.

He just liked Stan. There was a difference.

He didn't like guys in general. He just liked Stan. And that… wasn't entirely too weird. Was it?

Yeah, it was definitely weird.

This wasn't normal.

But, he could understand why it happened. He and Stan were close, and he admired him. Wouldn't that admiration eventually turn into something more?

By the time, he got to this part in his thoughts, he'd stop. At this point, he was just grateful for football season.

During the school day, Kyle was fortunately able to concentrate on his work. He could completely immerse himself in A.P. calculus, A.P. biology, A.P. Government, and rest of his strenuous classes.

At lunch, he saw Stan, but didn't say much. He chose to venture to the other end of the lunch room to see Craig.

Craig Tucker was tall, reserved, and very, very intimidating. In addition to this, Craig was also gay. He had come out midway through last year, but because of him being so intimidating, no one said anything about it for fear of having the shit beat out of them. So, as Kyle approached arguably the toughest kid in his school, he was understandably nervous.

Before he could even greet him, Craig turned to him and asked, "What?"

"Aah-JESUS." Tweek exclaimed. "It was like you KNEW he was coming."

South Park High School found out Craig was gay when he was seen in the hallways with his arm around Tweek. They'd gotten close since Tweek had a breakdown in the middle of school freshman year, and so it wasn't really shocking when they became official. At first, everyone was interested, but now they were just a regular couple. Or as much of a regular couple as a schizophrenic coffee addict and a stoic, frightening chain smoker can be.

After being throughly taken about by the greeting, Kyle proceeded. "Hey, can I talk to you guys?"

"You have a fight with Mr. Abercrombie?" Craig mused.

"Excuse me?"

"Your boyfriend looks like one of those half naked guys on their bags."

"Stan's not - wait, how did you know?"

"I didn't." Craig said. "But it doesn't surprise me."

Kyle dropped his kosher lunch bag and stared at the pair, mouth agape, for around thirty seconds.

"Whoa Craig -" Tweek exclaimed with a jitter, spilling some of his coffee on the table. "You're good."

"I know." He returned, turning his attention to Kyle. "You can sit down, you know."

Kyle picked up his lunch, which he suddenly no longer wanted to eat, and sighed as he sat down.

"So, do you wanna know the ins and outs of being gay or what?" Craig said flatly.

"I'm not gay."

"Okay."

"But I like Stan."

"Cool."

"It's not cool, Craig."

"Okay."

They were dead silent for a minute, the three pairs of eyes switching back and forth between glaring at each other.

"What did you want?" Craig asked.

"I- I don't really know."

"Okay."

"Earlier, when you mentioned Stan…"

"Yeah."

"How did you… know?"

Craig inhaled deeply, stretching his arms out over his head. "Well, it's kinda obvious."

"It is?" Kyle screamed.

"JESUS." Tweek injected.

"Calm down, Tweek." Craig quietly stated. "Don't fucking freak, Kyle. You'll upset him."

The redhead sighed. "Is it that obvious?"

"If you're looking for it."

In addition to being tall, reserved, intimidating, and gay, Craig was also vague; poetic, in a really douchey way.

"Why were you looking for it in Stan?"

"I don't like your boyfriend."

"He's not my boyfriend."

"Okay."

"Were you looking for it in me?"

"No. I don't like red hair."

"Do you like anything?"

"I like Tweek."

Kyle sighed, and realized that this was a horrible idea.

"So, you're gay now?" Craig mused.

"I'm not gay. I just like Stan." Was Kyle's resolute response.

"Which makes you gay."

Kyle decided to change the subject on that note. "Tweek, you seem calm."

It was true. While Tweek was still jittery and paranoid, his ticks had calmed; he had taken to twiddling his thumbs over his coffee thermos, instead of hiding behind it, or twirling his disheveled blonde hair instead of pulling it out.

"What?" Tweek jumped, but not quite like he would have at this time last year.

"You look a lot calmer."

"Yeah- Cr-craig helps me with that a lot."

"Well, I'm glad. You look much better than usual."

"Thanks."

"What's that supposed to mean, Broflowski?"

"Jesus Craig-" Tweek grabbed his boyfriend's arm.

"Oh, forgot. He only likes jocks."

"I don't like jocks."

"You like one jock."

Kyle was through with this. He could get the same treatment from Cartman. "Well, it was nice talking to you." He said as he got up.

"You going to the game, tonight?" Craig asked, not even turning around to look at Kyle.

"Yeah." Their conversation took place between their backs.

"Meet me in the parking lot after school?"

"Why?"

"Just meet me. You know what car I drive right?"

"Why?" Kyle turned around to face him.

"I'll see you after school, Kyle." Craig said with a wave, moving his arm around Tweek.

Kyle exhaled, and decided he would definitely not be seeing Craig after school.

"You hanging out with fags now?" Cartman was the first to greet him.

"Craig wanted to talk to me."

"About dicks?"

"No."

"Is Craig still mad at us about Peru?" Kenny asked.

"He didn't mention it."

"We all agreed Craig was a total dick about that. You shouldn't talk to a dick like that." Cartman reprimanded.

"He can talk to any dick he wants." Stan defended, and turned his attention to Kyle. "Do you have a ride home today, dude?"

The redhead refused to look at him directly. "Y-yeah, I'm going to the game with Craig."

"Good."

"You and Craig gonna start dating or what?" Cartman asked.

"He wanted to talk about psych stuff." Kyle lied. "He heard I was interested in it and he wanted to know if I knew anything about Tweek."

"Paging Doctor Jewfag, Doctor Jewfag to the cafeteria."

"Knock it off, Cartman. Do you still wanna come over tonight, after the game, you know?"

When dark blue eyes met green ones, Kyle choked on his own breath. "Yeah, dude, I'd love to."

As Kyle begrudgingly approached Craig's blue cavalier, he bit the corner of his mouth and thought about how he would approach this. Surely, Craig had liked Tweek before they dated. Or vice versa. Probably vice versa. And they had to deal with that somehow. This whole blushing and stumbling over words was getting a little ridiculous. He was acting like a fucking girl… around his best friend.

"Nice to see you, Kyle." Craig smiled like a cat.

"Hi-hi Kyle." Tweek greeted.

Kyle's greeting was a nod.

"Don't be so pissy." Craig returned opening his front door. "Get in. "

Craig pulled his seat forward to make room for Kyle to enter. The backseat of Craig's car wasn't as dirty was he thought it would be. It was littered with a few empty coffee cups, soda cans and cigarette packs, but there was still room for him to sit.

As Craig started the car, Beethoven's Ave Maria started playing.

"Do you like classical music, Craig?"

"Sorta. It helps Tweek though."

"Yeah, calms me down." Tweek jittered slightly, but calmed down when Craig put his hand on this thigh.

"Oh, before we go," Kyle started.

Craig didn't say anything but turned his attention to the redhead int he backseat.

"I'm sorry about Peru."

"Please don't ever mention that again."

"What happened in Peru?" Tweek asked.

"Horrible things." Craig said as he backed the car up.

"He actually saved the world, Tweek." Kyle exclaimed. "He's like a Peruvian prophet!"

Tweek's brief moment of excitement was quickly dampened when he saw Craig's unenthused face. "I didn't know you were Peruvian…"

"Neither did I." Craig returned in a voice even more monotone than usual.

The rest of the ride was silent with the exception of the array of arias and symphonies until they arrived at Harbucks.

"Doesn't look too busy." Craig commented, turning his attention to Tweek.

"Yeah, I get off at seven."

Craig quickly closed the distance between the two of them by placing a hand on his cheek. "Game's at six thirty. We'll get there before half time."

"Not in front of Kyle." Tweek squeaked out.

Craig's black eyes stared darkly at their backseat company. "Kyle, would you mind closing your eyes?"

Kyle raised an eyebrow but complied, shifting to face the window.

"Good enough for you?"

"Crai-gg, my parents might-"

"Shut up bitch." Craig's voice sounded much deeper than usual as he unbuckled his seatbelt and - judging by the sounds Kyle heard - crawling over to Tweek's seat. There were sounds of clothes rustling, gasps on the part of Tweek, and the occasional low chuckle from Craig between what Kyle assumed were kisses.

After about ninety seconds of this, Kyle turned to face the two as he cleared his throat. However, upon seeing Craig's mouth engulfing Tweek's, as the blonde's hands moved up to remove the signature blue chullo, he realized they were a little too caught up in each other to pick up on Kyle's subtle hints. Fortunately as Craig bit down hard at the skin of Tweek's neck, he let out a yelp, turned his head and met gazes with Kyle.

"Ah! Jesus! Craig!" Tweek cried as he pushed his boyfriend off him.

"I guess Kyle's ready to go." Craig mused as he drug his hand up from between Tweek's legs.

"Really dude?" Kyle exclaimed.

"I kindly asked you to look away."

"And what? Am I supposed to just sit here while you guys make out for twenty minutes?"

"I'd like it." Craig smiled, biting his bottom lip out of the side of his mouth as he climbed over to the drivers seat.

"Craig-"

"He was probably turned on by all those sounds you were making."

"Was not."

"Better not have been." Craig mumbled before chuckling quietly as he watched Tweek struggle to readjust himself in his corduroy pants.

"Don't laugh, Craig!"

"I'm not laughing. I'm admiring."

"Nngh.."

Craig smiled out of the corner of his mouth and opened the door. "Do you like coffee, Kyle?" He asked, folding the chair over to let his guest out.

"Uh, sure."

"Good, get me a large cup of Peruvian black, and whatever the hell you want."

"Hey-"

"That's about ninety-eight dollars that you and your boyfriend still owe me."

Kyle shoved his hands resolutely into his pockets as the three entered Harbucks.

"Hi Tweek," His mom greeted from behind the counter. "Oh, hello Craig!"

"Hello Mrs. Tweak!" Craig greeted with the same mouth he had just violated her son with. "How's business?"

"Oh, busy mornings, slow afternoons. The usual." She returned, handing Tweek his apron.

"Who's your friend?"

"You remember Kyle, mom." Tweek introduced, putting on his apron.

"Oh, the Broflowski boy! I haven't heard you talk about him for a while! You and Tweek used to be friends in elementary school."

"Yeah, we did." Kyle had almost forgotten.

"Nowadays, he spends all his time with Craig."

"Aw, what's wrong with that?" Craig asked, his voice monotone but sweet.

"Nothing! You know we love you, Craig. You've been such a good friend to Tweek."

"Good, because I love you too." Craig returned, hugging his boyfriend's mom.

And as the awkward moment in which Kyle could do nothing but watch passed, the mother in question turned her attention to him. "Kyle, how are you?"

"I'm good. Can I order something though?"

"Oh, certainly!" She headed back behind the counter. "What'll it be?"

"An iced cappuccino, and a large Peruvian black coffee."

"Sure thing. I'll be right back with those."

And as Mrs. Tweak disappeared behind the doors to the kitchen, Craig approached her son once more.

"Have a good day at work, Tweekheart." Said the noirette as he placed a hand on the wall behind his boyfriend.

"Thanks, I'll see you at seven."

"Until then." Craig whispered, grabbing Tweek by the chin and pulling him into a kiss that was so soft, it shocked Kyle.

And just as Craig backed away from the kiss, Mrs. Tweak returned with their orders. "Here you go, boys!"

"Thanks Mrs. Tweak." Craig smiled as he headed for the door while she and Kyle exchanged money. "We'll be back for him at seven."

"Where will you boys being going after work?"

"Football game." Kyle said with a sip of his cappuccino.

"Alright, I'll see you boys then."

"See ya!" Craig waved as he headed out the door.

"Thank you." Kyle waved shyly.

"An iced cappuccino? How terribly metro, Kyle."

"Says you. When did you become such a suckup?"

"When I met Tweek's parents." Craig returned, unlocking his door.

As Kyle entered the car, Craig swiftly changed CDs and lit a cigarette.

"No more Beethoven."

"Dimmu Borgir."

"Quite the switch."

"Tweek isn't a fan of heavy stuff."

Kyle sipped his iced coffee and took note of Craig. He was tall, like Stan, and skinny, like Kyle. His eyes were almost black, in contrast to his pale skin. When they were younger, he sort of looked like Stan, but since then, his face had grown longer and his bones stuck out sharply.

"You checking me out, Broflowski?"

"You wish."

"You can tell yourself that."

They were silent for a few moments as they drove.

"Have you ever dated someone, Kyle?" Craig questioned. "I never kept up with rumors or anything so I don't know much about you."

"Not since I dated Bebe in sixth grade."

"Do you want to date Stan?"

Kyle looked at his coffee. "I'm not sure."

"Dating is a big thing… You have to give up a lot. And put up with a lot of assholes."

"I figured."

"From people you don't even know. From people you thought you could trust."

"You make this sound like a movie premier."

"It's a big thing, Kyle. And to… come to someone like me for advice, I think you're pretty goddamn serious."

"I am, Craig. I don't… know what's going on. It's like… it's everything I felt for him before, just times like ten thousand."

Craig laughed, and finished his coffee, throwing it in the backseat with the rest of its kind.

"How did you and Tweek start dating?" Kyle asked.

"Does it matter?"

"Not really, but I'm curious."

Craig sighed, reaching into his pocket and lit another cigarette. "That mental breakdown Tweek had freshman year?"

"Yeah."

"I watched it happen."

"What do you mean?"

"Some older kids beat him up and I watched. I did nothing to stop it. When they had scattered, I was still there. His lip and nose were bleeding, his face was smeared with dirt and blood, his shirt was all torn, and he could hardly talk. He came over to me and started bawling and screaming. He told me there were monsters inside him, and that they'd been there for years. He told me about how they'd come out from inside his closet at night, cut his stomach open and go in through there. He told me how they ran rampant in his mind. He told me how he wouldn't eat for days to try to starve them but they'd come back. He'd show me the cuts on his arms where he'd try to let them out, but more would come in. He said the older kids had sent them to torment him when he wasn't at school. He screamed and asked me why they were targeting him. I stayed with him there for hours until the nurse came out for him."

"It fucking changed me. I had just gone out to smoke and didn't even know those kids. But that month when he was in that hospital, I found all those guys. One of them is still missing a tooth because of me. And when he finally came back, still strung out on those pills that made him a zombie, I told him no one would fuck with him anymore. I made sure he was safe. I started hanging out with him outside of school. Eventually, he stopped taking that medicine. He picked up my smoking habit, but we also started meditating, so he's been able to be cool in school. And somewhere, in there, I fell in love with him. I didn't confess in a loving way. I just lit his cigarette one day and said, "I love you." Just like that. And then he smiled at me. He said, "I love you too." And when I saw him happy like that… I want to make him happy forever. And so that's what I've been doing."

Kyle was speechless. The stoic Craig he had known his entire life had been obliterated and rebuilt again in the same form.

"Happy?"

Kyle visibly drew back. "Yeah, I guess."

They were silent as Craig approached a red light, the only sound coming from the soft clicking of the turn signal.

"You changed a lot since elementary school."

"You too, Broflowski." Craig smiled out of the side of his mouth and put out his cigarette before he pulled into his driveway. Kyle had been here before, at some various point in his youth, but it was awkward to be there again.

Craig's room was plain, and messy. He had a TV with an XBox, a dresser and a mirror, but with a pile of books, DVDs, and games hiding the reflection. Beside his bed, there was a nightstand with a cage for his guinea pig.

"You still have a guinea pig?"

"Yeah, my aunt gives me them." He explained, taking the slender creature into his hands. "And I like them."

"It's cute. Can I pet him?"

"It's a girl. And sure." He said, setting his pet on the bed. Kyle sat down and the creature came to him eagerly.

"She's friendly. What's her name?"

"Rayas."

"Rayas?"

"Spanish. For stripes."

"Do you know Spanish?"

"A little."

Kyle exhaled dramatically and laid himself on Craig's bed.

"Make yourself comfortable, why don't you, Broflowski?" Craig mused, headed for his closet.

Kyle did as he was sarcastically told, rolling over to examine the remainder of Craig's nightstand. He saw Rayas's cage, a lamp, a pack of cigarettes, and two framed photos. One was of Craig and Tweek; it had been taken at Token's Christmas party last year (Kyle had been invited but forced to leave early for Hanukkah.) Tweek's smile in the picture was awkward, but ever so endearing, and as usual, Craig was smirking out of the side of his mouth. The other was a picture of one of the Mayan pyramids. It had been ripped unevenly from a magazine with a note reading, "we'll go here together" in a messy series of scratches that had to be Tweek's.

"Do you and Tweek wanna go to Mexico?"

"Yeah."

Kyle scanned the room quickly, but still with enough attention to notice Craig's books bore titles like, "Ancient Mexico," "Mysteries of the Mayans," and "Aztec Architecture."

"Craig," Kyle began. "Do you like-"

"Did you come here to find out my dirty secrets or to talk about your goddamn crush?" Craig cut him off, scooping Rayas off Kyle's stomach and into his hands.

"You loved Peru."

"Fuck you, Broflowski."

Kyle exhaled, briefly, but ever so immensely, satisfied before he remember why he had even gone to see Craig in the first place.

"I like Stan."

"I know."

"How did you know?" Kyle asked, dramatically leaning against Craig's headboard.

"You told me."

"Before that. In the cafeteria, you said something about him being my boyfriend."

"Well, you guys are kind of always together. It would only be natural."

"Really?"

"I wouldn't be surprised. I figured you guys had liked each other for years."

"Really?"

"Well, have you?"

Kyle's mouth twitched uncomfortably. "I-I don't know. I've always admired him. But… it wasn't." Kyle paused, and looked at Craig, who merely looked blankly at him3, before continuing. "It wasn't like this."

"Hmm," Craig mused. "Do you think Stan likes you?"

Kyle answered quickly, as to prevent thinking about the question any longer. "I don't know."

"Well, do you think he hates you?"

"No…"

"Then, do you think he cares about you?"

"Yes. I know he does."

"That's important. Guys don't really care about people often."

Kyle narrowed his eyes. "I know."

"Do you think Stan could find you attractive?"

Kyle shifted uncomfortably.

Craig smiled out of one side of his mouth. "Do you?"

"I don't know?"

"Oh, so there's no sexual tension yet?"

"No!"

"Oh, well, just wait. That's fun."

"Urggg." Kyle screamed from inside his throat.

"You're such a girl."

"Fuck you, Craig."

"So, are you gonna tell him?"

"Gyah!" Kyle cried out again in frustration.

"Jesus, stop that. You sound like Tweek."

"I'm not gonna tell him."

"Oh. Then, why the fuck are you here?"

"To try to see what's wrong with me?"

"Don't start that bullshit. There's nothing fucking wrong with you. You just have a crush on a dude."

"Not just a dude! Stan's my best friend!"

"Yeah, and?"

"If I tell him, that'll make things really awkward."

"Yeah, probably." Craig shrugged.

"So, I can't tell him."

"So, are you planning on sitting in my room for the rest of your life and telling me about how you pine away for him?"

"Not the rest of my life."

"No, fuck that dude. That's pathetic and I have better things to do."

"Like what? Make out with Tweek in front of people and watch Red Racer?"

"They're both infinitely better than this bullshit."

"Fuck you! Weren't you the one who wanted me to come here in the first place?"

"Yeah. But I didn't think you'd be such a fucking pussy about it!"

"This is my first time dealing with this kind of stuff. Have some sympathy!"

"When it was my first time, no one was there to fucking hold my hand and tell me all that, 'oh, you're perfect together' bullshit. I'm not going to treat you like a fucking girl."

"I don't want you to treat me like a girl!"

"Then stop fucking acting like one!"

"Fuck you, Craig." Kyle said resolutely as he stood up.

"Where you going?"

"I'm going to the game."

"How?"

"I'll call Kenny."

"And you expect Kenny to get his dick out of whatever it's in at the moment, and come save you from the big mean Craig monster?"

"Yes."

"Jesus, you're such a pussy." Craig stated, throwing something plastic at him.

"Fuckin' what?" Kyle returned, turning around to see that it was an XBox controller thrown at him.

"Blow off your steam like a normal boy. Kill me a few times in CoD. Don't go all off in a tizzy." Craig rambled as he started up the game.

Kyle stared at the controller, and sighed. "Fine." He mumbled, sitting cross legged on the floor in front of Craig's TV.

Within ten seconds, Kyle's half of the screen was stained with blood spatters.

"If I kill you more than ten times, you have to tell Stan." Craig stated.

"What?" Kyle spat.

"Did I stutter?"

"Why would I do that?"

"Make the game more interesting."

"I'm not doing that!"

"Whatever, but I just killed you again." Craig said flatly.