Meandering on his way home, Sousuke delighted in watching the world move
about him. Not the other shinigami, of course, but rather nature. Sousuke's soft
auburn eyes sparkled as he observed a bird land a few feet from him. The
creature eyed him indifferently and pushed its beak to the ground in search of
seeds. Sousuke stood very still and watched.
Suddenly, a boy rushed towards the bird causing it to fly away. The boy
laughed before turning to Sousuke and sneering. It was a boy from grammar
school. Sousuke didn't even bother to say anything as the child took off to rejoin
his snickering group of friends. The pariah felt tears sting the back of his eyes,
but, as always, he forced them back. There was no point in emotion. Nothing
would change.
Anxious now to return home, Sousuke hurried the rest of the way home. By
the time he reached the front sliding doors of his home, he was fatigued and
eager to get to his room. Quietly sliding the door open, Sousuke left his shoes on
the front stair and padded into the kitchen. His mother, Sayaka was busy rinsing
bowls and tea cups.
Sousuke put on a polite smile "Hello, mother." Startled, Sayaka spun around
and exhaled loudly. Catching her breath Sayaka smiled faintly. "Oh Sousuke-kun,
you're home early." Her thin hands shook as she ushered him closer for a hug.
once he reached for her, he thought he saw her wince, but he wasn't sure. For
a moment Sousuke relished in the smell of his mother's chestnut colored hair
before he pulled away. He explained "I finished all my work for the day." He left
out the part about being humiliated by his peers again. He always left that part
out.
Sayaka smiled broadly and ran her fingers through his hair. "You're such a
clever boy." Sousuke felt his spirits lift. Even if the rest of the world hated him, at
least he had his mother. Sayaka tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear.
"Your father is having a drink with an old friend of his down the hall. Dinner may
be a little late." Sousuke merely nodded before excusing himself.
Wandering to his room, Sousuke paused briefly before the closed door in the
hall. He heard his father's voice as well as another man's. Not wanting to
eavesdrop, Sousuke hurried to his room. Settling in, he pulled out a sheet of
paper and practiced his kanji. When he filled the page with impeccably neat
characters, he stopped and evaluated his work. Had he been in class, a teacher
would have praised his work before moving on, leaving him alone with the
classmates who despised him.
After a moment of reflection, Sousuke tore the page in half. Adults always
went out of their way to praise him. Telling him how special he was, but the
graces were only momentary. Not even those who extolled him seemed to want
to be near him for too long. His mother had reassured him on several occasions
that it was just the strength of his reitsu that scared people off. That was it.
Tearing the slices into thirds, then quarters, Sousuke swallowed down the
lump in his throat. Despite his placid expression and soft brown eyes, Sousuke
was usually a swirling tempest of emotions. Anger, shame, and misery were
almost a constant. There was so much he could do, but the things he could not do
hurt the worst. The boy slid his glasses off and rubbed his eyes in an effort to calm
his thoughts. He always thought too much.
Gathering up the ripped scraps of paper, Sousuke hid them underneath his
futon. He had never wanted his parents to know about the problems he faced
daily. It was humiliating enough without their knowledge. Besides, Sousuke
reviled in his ability to keep a calm face despite his true feelings. It was one of the
few talents he was happy to have.
Feeling considerably on edge, Sousuke decided that he would calm himself
down with a cup of tea. The raging storm of his mind already began to subside as
he imagined the pleasant warmth filling his tummy. A childish excitement
enveloped him as he made his way to the kitchen.