Cwam: Thank you for the review!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or My Immortal

Ch 6

Harry and his friends have returned to the Common Room. It was the sixth day that they have read the story, My Immortal. Ron was sitting on the couch, and everyone else sat on the floor. The story had now included Malfoy, Harry, Ron, and Hermione. Any one of them could be in the story, they just hoped on the contrary. It was funny because they weren't involved, and they wished that it could stay that way. "Hey guys, are you ready?" Ron asked as he pulled out the parchment. The only response was that everyone was looking at him. "I'll take that as a yes."

Chapter 11.

AN: i sed stup flaming up prepz! c if dis chaptr is srupid!1111 it delz wit rly sris issus! sp c 4 urself if itz ztupid brw fangz 2 ma frend raven 4 hleping me!

"Does this girl know proper English?" Ron asked as he tried to make out what she was saying.

"No Ron, she didn't make it past kindergarten." Hermione said.

"That explains a lot." Ron replied.

"NO!" I screamed. I was horrorfied! B'loody Mary tried to comfort me but I told her fuck off and I ran to my room crying myself. Dumbledore chased after me shouting but he had to stop when I went into my room cause he would look like a perv that way.

Anyway, I started crying tears of blood and then I slit both of my wrists. They got all over my clothes so I took them off and jumped into the bath angrily while I put on a Linkin Park song at full volume. I grabbed a steak and almost stuck it into my heart to commit suicide. I was so fucking depressed! I got out of the bathtub and put on a black low-cut dress with lace all over it sandly. I put on black high heels with pink metal stuff on the ends and six pairs of skull earrings. I couldn't fucking believe it. Then I looked out the window and screamed… Snap was spying on me and he was taking a video tape of me! And Loopin was masticating to it! They were sitting on their broomsticks.

"Why am I even friends with this person?" Hermione asked. Everyone shrugged at her. "I don't think that Dumbledore would react that way." Angelina said.

"Wait, Snape was videotaping Ebony?" Fred asked weirdly. George shrugged at him.

"And Lupin was masticating? What was he eating? Some candy from Honeydukes?" Cho asked.

"I don't think that she meant mastication, I think she meant…" Marietta said but she was interrupted by Seamus who made a 'blech' sound. Zacharias covered his ears, and closed his eyes. He started screaming 'la la la la la la la! I can't hear you!" Ginny ran to the nearest trash can and was throwing up. She ran up to the bathroom and came back down with a rag. George put an arm around her. Fred came and sat next to her. He put a hand on her shoulder and asked, "Ginny, are you going to be okay?" She blinked and said, "Other than the fact that I'm going to be scarred for life, I'm okay." She said. "I thought that Snape hated Lupin." Harry said.

"Why do you say that?" Fred asked.

"You should look at the teacher's table once in a while. If looks could kill, Lupin wouldn't have made it past the first night." Harry replied.

"EW, YOU FUCKING PERVS, STOP LOOKING AT ME NAKED! ARE YOU PEDOS OR WHAT!" I screamed putting on a black towel with a picture of Marilyn Mason on it. Suddenly Vampire ran in.

"Abra Kedavra!" he yelled at Snape and Loopin pointing his womb. I took my gun and shot Snape and Loopin a gazillion times and they both started screaming and the camera broke. Suddenly, Dumblydore ran in. "Ebony, it has been revealed that someone has - NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he shouted looking at Snape and Loopin and then he waved his wand and suddenly…

"I thought a pedophile was someone that was attracted to children?" Luna asked.

"They are," Dean said, "An endophile is someone who is attracted to teenagers."

"Wait, where did you get that from?" Neville asked.

"Muggle Studies Book, Chapter 28 Muggle Crimes." Dean said as he pointed to the book. Neville nodded.

"Wait, if someone shouts that curse, wouldn't they be dead?" Cedric asked.

"Why would they need a gun? I thought wizards use wands?" Lee Jordan asked.

"Again, does anything in this story make any sense?" Ernie asked.

"No." Lee replied.

Hargrid ran outside on his broom and said everyone we need to talk.

"What do you know, Hargrid? You're just a little Hogwarts student!"

"I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT…." Hargirid paused angrily. "BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!"

"This cannot be." Snap said in a crisp voice as blood dripped from his hand where Dumblydore's wand had shot him. "There must be other factors."

"YOU DON'T HAVE ANY!" I yelled in madly.

Loopin held up the camera triumelephantly. "The lens may be ruined but the tape is still there!"

"Hagrid got expelled fifty years ago, didn't he Harry?" Hermione asked, "you cleared his name."

"Yeah, I did." Harry said.

"Why does Professor Lupin have the video camera?" Justin asked.

"I have asked this a gajillion times, but I will ask once more. Does anything in this story make any sense?" Ron asked.

"No." Justin replied.

I felt faint, more than I normally do like how it feels when you do not drink enough blood.

"Why are you doing this?" Loopin said angrily while he rubbed his dirty hands on his clook.

And then I heard the words that I had heard before but not from him. I did not know whether to feel shocked and happy or to bite him and drink his blood because I felt faint.

"BECAUSE…BECAUSE…." Hargid said and he paused in the air dramitaclly, waving his wand in the air. Then swooped he in singing to the tune of a gothic version of a song by 50 Cent.

"Because you're goffic?" Snap asked in a little afraid voice cause he was afraind it meant he was connected with Satan.

"Because I LOVE HER!"

"NO!" Harry shouted as he made a fist and hit the ground, "We lost Hagrid!"

"Let's just hope that's not the only person that we lose." Hermione said as she put her hand on Harry's shoulder. "Now, we're going on to the next chapter." Ron said as he pulled the other parchment out.

Chapter 12.

AN: stop f,aing ok hargrid is a pedo 2 a lot of ppl in amerikan skoolz r lik dat I wunted 2 adres da ishu! how du u no snap iant kristian plus hargrid isn't really in luv wif ebony dat was sedric ok!

"I sincerely doubt it." Cho said.

"Everything that is true in life is not in this story." Hannah said.

"NO!" I THOUGHT IT WAS HAIRgrid but it was Vampire. He started to scream. "OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!" and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his red whites.

I stopped. "How did u know?"

"I saw it! And my scar turned back into the lightning bolt!"

"NO!" I ran up closer. "I thought you didn't have a scar anymore!" I shouted.

"I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation." he said back. "Anyway my scar hurt and it turned back into the lightning bolt! Save me! then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco….Volfemort has him bondage!"

"My scar has always been a lightning bolt." Harry said.

"Not in this story, it isn't." Seamus said.

"That's so cool, Harry, you can see into the future!" Colin said.

"I wish," Harry said, "Then I would know what days I shouldn't turn up for potions."

Anyway I was in the school nurse's office now recovering from my slit wrists. Snap and Loopin and HAHRID were there too. They were going to St. Mango's after they recovered cause they were pedofiles and you can't have those fucking pervs teaching in a school with lots of hot gurlz. Dumbledore had constipated the cideo camera they took of me naked. I put up my middle finger at them.

Anyway Hargrid came into my hospital bed holding a bouquet of pink roses.

"Enoby I need to tell u somethnig." he said in a v. serious voice, giving me the roses.

"Fuck off." I told him. "You know I fucking hate the color pink anyway, and I don't like fucked up preps like you." I snapped. Hargrid had been mean to me before for being gottik.

"No Enoby." Hargrid says. "Those are not roses."

"What, are they goffs too you poser prep?" I asked cause I was angry that he had brought me pink roses.

"I saved your life!" He yelled angrily. "No you didn't I replied." "You saved me from getting a Paris Hilton p- video made from your shower scene and being vued by Snap and Loopin." Who MASTABATED (c is dat speld rong) to it he added silently.

"So Snape and Lupin went to St. Mungo's for being endophiles?" Lavender Brown asked.

"I'll miss Professor Lupin." Luna said.

"Why would Hagrid be so worried about her?" Marietta asked.

"Because he loves her." Cho said as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"I think I'm going to throw up again," Ginny said as she ran to the bathroom. She came back with a bucket, and put it in front of her. "In case of any accidents," she said to Ron, who was giving her a weird look.

"Whatever!" I yelled angirly.

He pointed his wand at the pink roses. "These aren't roses." He suddenly looked at them with an evil look in his eye and muttered Well If you wanted Honesty that's all you haD TO SAY! .

"That's not a spell that's an MCR song." I corrected him wisely.

"I know, I was just warming up my vocal cordes." Then he screamed. "Petulus merengo mi kremicli romacio(4 all u cool goffic mcr fans out, there, that is a tribute! specially for raven I love you girl!)imo noto okayo!"

And then the roses turned into a huge black flame floating in the middle of the air. And it was black. Now I knew he wasn't a prep.

"OK I believe you now wtf is Drako?"

Hairgrid rolled his eyes. I looked into the balls of flame but I could c nothing.

"U c, Enobby," Dumblydore said, watching the two of us watching the flame. "2 c wht iz n da flmes(HAHA U REVIEWRS FLAMES GEDDIT) u mst find urslf 1st, k?"

"I HAVE FOUND MYSELF OK YOU MEAN OLD MAN!" Hargrid yelled. dUMBLydore lookd shockd. I guess he didn't have a headache or else he would have said something back.

"Is that even a spell?" Katie Bell asked Alicia Spinnet. She shrugged as her answer.

"I think they have made it perfectly clear that the flame was black." Padma said.

"Why would Hagrid yell at Professor Dumbledore like that? He usually holds him in high regard," Parvarti asked.

Hairgrid stormed off back into his bed. "U r a liar, prof dumbledoree!"

Anyway when I got better I went upstairs and put on a black leather minidress that was all ripped on the ends with lace on it. There was some corset stuff on the front. Then I put on black fishnets and black high-heeled boots with pictures of Billie Joe Armstrong on them. I put my hair all out around me so I looked like Samara from the Ring (if u don't know who she iz ur a prep so fuk off!) and I put on blood-red lipstick, black eyeliner and black lip gloss.

"You look kawai, girl." B'loody Mary said sadly. "Fangs (geddit) you do too." I said sadly too, but I was still upset. I slit both of my wrists feeling totally depressed and I sucked all the blood. I cried again in my bathroom and put the shades on so Snap and Loopin couldn't spy on me this time. I went to some classes. Vampire was in the Hair of Magical Magic Creatures. He looked all depressed because Draco had disappeared and he had used to be in love with Draco. He was sucking some blood from a Hufflepuff.

"What is kawai mean?" Ron asked as he looked up at the group. "I think it's a Japanese phrase for cute," Dean Thomas said.

"Where on Earth do you get that from?" Ron asked.

"Muggle Studies, Chapter 17: Muggle Slang from Around the World," Dean replied.

"Ooohhh…" Ron replied.

"I thought that Snape and Lupin went to St. Mungo's, why would they still be at Hogwarts?" Zacharias asked.

"Don't make me…" Ron said.

"Nothing makes sense, gotcha." Zacharias said glumly.

"That's awkward. Why would I suck blood in the middle of class?" Harry asked as he grimaced.

"Hi." he said in a depressed way. "Hi back." I said in an wqually said way.

We both looked at each other for some time. Harry had beautiful red gothic eyes so much like Dracos. Then… we jumped on each other and started screwing each other.

"STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!" shouted Professor McGoggle who was watching us and so was everyone else.

"Vampire you fucker!" I said slapping him. "Stop trying to screw me. You know I loved Draco!" I shouted and then I ran away angrily.

Just then he started to scream. "OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!" and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his red whites.

"NO!" I ran up closer.

"I thought you didn't have a scar anymore!" I shouted.

"I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation." he said back. "Anyway my scar hurt and then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco….Volfemort has him bondage!"

SPECIAL FANGZ 2 RAVEN MY GOFFIX BLOOD SISTA WTF UR SUPPOZD 2 RIT DIS!11111111

HEY RAVEN DO U KNOW WHERE MY SWEATER I

"EEEWWWWW!" Harry replied as he covered his ears and closed his eyes. "Why would someone do this to me?" Everyone stared at him, they had no idea how to reply.

"I love Professor McGonagall now," George said, "she's my new hero next to Snape and Dumbledore."

"She tried to blame Harry for it? Doesn't this girl realize that it takes two to tango?" Cedric asked incredulously.

"Didn't she already state this?" Ginny asked.

"I think she doesn't know which way is up, personally." Ron replied back.

Neville came running back, "Guys, we almost got busted because McGonagall was near. Everyone needs to get out before she sees us." Everyone left. Ron, Hermione, and Harry were the only people still in the common room. "Harry, it's going to get worse." Ron said.

"I know, Ron, I know." Harry replied back.

Please R&R