My dearest,

I am so lost without you by my side. All of these mechs are looking to me for strength and support. Which, I suppose, is normal. I am the Prime, after all. But, am I really a Prime without my mate by my side? I'm not so sure. Perhaps in title, but when you leave me, I feel as though I am no longer worthy of the title. I need you with me; you give me such strength. I have to keep thinking that you'll always be with me through the bond. But, I will always feel better when you're within my reach.

I enjoy everything about you, dearest. I enjoy chasing your pleasure, whatever form it may be. I love being there when you wake, your beautiful optics coming online to look at me with that sensual expression. When you wake, you look exactly like you do when you're underneath me, experiencing an intense overload. I love seeing that look in your optics, no matter the situation. I long to make you create that expression, no matter when or where.

I enjoy making sure that you are well rested and well fed. I'm afraid that I have a dominant male need to see that you drink your daily energon. I love knowing that you are well provided for, and by my hand, none the less. Which makes me worry, are you consuming enough energon? I hope you are, Elita. I need you to be taken care of, even if I'm not there. Are you recharging properly? I know that's it difficult without being in my presence. I have the exact same problem. I know it's difficult to adjust to daily life without one another, but have faith that I will not let you go without me in your berth for long.

I would go on, dearest, but I already have three mechs waiting for me outside my office. I will try to write you as soon as possible, but please write me. I need to know that you're happy and healthy, darling. Even if it's just a little note, I'll know that you're doing well.

~Your Sparkmate, Optimus.

Elita smiled, leaning back against Optimus's broad chest. He had called her into the bedroom to view a few of the letters he had written her over the vorns. At first, she was a little irritated, because there was no evidence that he had cleaned at all. But, when she saw the old letters that he had unearthed, there was no way she could stay irritated.

Instead, she had accepted his broad hand and let him pull her onto the berth. With a few tender kisses, Optimus handed her a data pad and had gone silent. When she clicked it on, she saw that it was a collection of letters he had written her long ago. With another click, she moved on to the next letter.

Lita,

I wish you were here with me right now. Ratchet is doing his absolute best to patch me up, but I'm still in so much pain. He moved me into a private room, which is the biggest mercy I have experienced by the medic's hand. At least now I don't have to pretend like I'm not in pain. This is the first time that I've been this hurt without you beside me. It's completely selfish, but I have come to expect you to be with me while I recover.

I was scared that I was going to die when I woke up and you weren't by my side. I thought that maybe Ratchet had barred you from the room so you couldn't watch me die. I was on a lot of painkillers at the time, love. The most shattering thing about the situation was that I was so…so…hopeful. I was. I was hopeful that you were by my side, that everything was back to normal. And then I woke up to dark walls and the smell of medical grade sanitizer. Let me just say that it was a far cry from waking up in your embrace, with your scent surrounding me and clinging to me.

But, here I am. I'm so looking forward to coming home to you. Ratchet has told me that we're only a few orns out from docking on the Ark. I'm terribly afraid that I won't be in very good condition when you see me. I may or may not be missing a limb…or two. My greatest regret is that one of the aforementioned limbs missing is my left arm. I won't be able to hold you. I long to hold you in my arms, but the best I'll be able to do is an awkward, one armed hug. I hope that it will be enough for you. I know that being able to hold you, in any form, will bring my spark so much happiness.

I have more bad news. Ratchet has made me swear, on pain of death, not to interface with you for at least a decacycle. That is the most painful injury of all, lover. I don't care about not having an arm and a leg. I care that I will not be able to hold you to me as we recharge. I care that I won't be able to make to love at all…not even close to my orns long fantasy I've been developing lately.

Ratchet is back. He's going to send me into recharge for a few days while he repairs my legs. I'll be docking in a few orns. I love you very much. I'll be so glad to finally hold you and kiss you. (Even if I am missing an arm…and a leg…)

Love, Optimus Prime.

Elita clicked the data-pad off. Those had been a few very dark orns. She vividly remembered standing in the docking bay when the Autobot warcruiser, Misec, had pulled into the Ark. She had been standing as close to the ship as the medics would allow. Elita became more and more nervous as the medics crept closer and closer to the docking ship. When the medics became nervous, she became nervous.

The horror burned in her optics as mech after mech was pulled from the ship in pieces. Elita knew that more than a few of those mechs would not pull through to see the turning of the next star. But, the most sparkbreaking thing of all was watching her giant mate be pulled off the ship. Her commander, her prime and her lover was in terrible shape.

It took four warriors to carry him off the ship, Sunstreaker and Sideswipe among them. That was the first day she had burst into tears in front of her soldiers. When Sunstreaker gently placed his hand on her shoulder as he left, she knew the situation was dire. And looking at her broken and twisted mate, she knew that things were going to be bad for a while. It had taken Ratchet decacycles to get Optimus back in working order.

It had also been the first time in their relationship where she had been recognized as the Prime's replacement. Sure, they had always seen her as the Femme Commander, but to be thought of Optimus's replacement had both given her intense hope and fear. She had to admit that the fear most likely stemmed from the fact that she was constantly sitting by her mate's berth, wondering if he would ever wake.

Walking into that medbay everyday had been the hardest things she had ever done. It was nothing in comparison to being Prime's replacement for a few decacycles. It was always dark, because apparently Ratchet never felt the need to leave lights on for a mech in stasis. She couldn't blame him. Resources during wars were precious. But, walking into a completely dark room to greet a comatose mech was one of the most horrible things she had ever experienced. It was even worse when it was her sparkmate. She couldn't help it; she had a selfish need to have him cuddle her, to touch her, to make love to her. Anything to let her know that he was alive.

When Ratchet finally messaged her that he was ready to bring Optimus online, her spark had nearly sputtered to a stop. It had been so long since she had seen him online that she was a little scared. What if something went wrong and Ratchet couldn't get Optimus back? What if something had addled his processor and he wasn't the same mech?

When she had been standing above him and his optics had come online, her spark nearly flew out of its casing. Feeling Optimus's essence swirling around her own, even if just through the bond, was something to treasure. And when she threw herself down on top of his chest and clung to him, feeling those arms wrap around her was the best thing she had ever felt. And then hearing Optimus growl at Ratchet was the best thing she had ever heard; there was no reason Elita should not make herself comfortable on top of his patient.

Optimus had still been recovering when they had become intimate. It was horribly naughty of them. Optimus had been on strict orders to rest while in the medbay. There was no way that they were going to be able to keep hands to themselves after being apart for so long. Ratchet should really know better than that by now. So, she, Elita One-Femme Commander, and Optimus Prime-leader of the Autobots, had made love in the medbay like naughty younglings.

And it was good.

Elita,

I want you to focus upon the times we have made love in the past. Yes, including the time in the medbay. I need you to think about this because I want to let you know that you are not alone in your feelings of desire. Yes. I am miserably desirous of you. I was only able to make love to you once before I had to leave again. You know me. I need you so much. Having you only once is like torture to my spark. Our last sparkbond was so beautiful and so powerful. I swear I can still feel little bits of energy still bouncing around in my spark.

Anyways, love, concentrate on our love making. I want you to think about my hands. Think about how many times they have teased you, made you overload. Think of my mouth and my glossa. Haven't they also brought you pleasure? I know that you love it so much when I kiss you. I can feel it when you arch into me, completely lost to your passion, wonton with lust.

Think about my chestplates. I loved your last letter so much. I still have it with me and I read it constantly-whenever I need to feel you close to my spark. I love it when you touch my chestplates. Still with me, love? Yes? Good. Now, I want you to think about me over you, being the only thing you see. Why? Because I want you to know that I am the only mech that will ever be allowed to make love to you. (And because I know you love to be dominated. Do not even try to be stoic about this, Elita. I know you too well for that. You love to be dominated.)

Do you remember the first time we ever coupled, Elita? I remember it fondly. I was the first one to touch you. I was the first one to kiss you. I was the only one to ever touch you intimately, and it shall remain that way. I still remember watching you arch into me and gasp with those tiny breaths. I have never been more of the fact that you are a femme and I am a mech as I was at that point. You were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. You still are.

Do you remember those days, Elita? Back when you were Ariel and I was Orion? I find myself almost pining for those days. They were, in a way, much easier. I would come home from the archives and you would be home already. We would heat our energon together and then I would take you to the berth. We would spend all night making love, laughing and chasing one another around the berth. Then, in the morning, both of us completely exhausted, I'd take you one last time before going to work.

Now we're lucky if I can make love with you once a decacycle. And now we have an even more driving need, known as our bond. I can't tell you how many times my spark screams at me to bond with you. I'm sure you know. You are one half of this relationship, after all. But, still. You should be so proud of yourself, my femme. You have reduced the Prime to a pile of want. Here I am, love. Laying on my cold, unfeeling berth, pining over you.

And…there is Prowl knocking at my door once again. Right on time, as always. I bid you goodbye, femme. I'll see you soon. And you won't leave my berth for days. That's a threat and a promise.

~Orion Pax

Elita shivered after reading the last line. He had certainly made good on his threat and promise. She had not been able to get out from under her mate for many cycles. At one point, Optimus had even cuffed her to the berth, left to get energon and came back to continue her blissful torture.

She leaned back into her mate's embrace, and his large arms came around her, taking the data pad from her hands. Her optics offlined and she relaxed against the chest she loved so much. Reading the raw emotion in his letters had her interface systems running a little hot. Not only because her mate made her hot, but because she loved him so much. And she wanted to show him.

Her optics came online and she took in the sight of his masculine jaw. Her mech was all mech. There were virtually no curves on his frame; he was all angles. She, on the other hand, was all curves. There were times when she thought she was a little too curvy, but every time she voiced that concern, Optimus showed her exactly how he felt about her frame.

She nipped at his jawline softly, mouthing the soft metal that resided there. Optimus's great frame shuddered and his mouth opened to emit a moan. It had been a fair amount of time since they had made love and he was helpless against his femme's advances. But, he had a plan to move the night along.

"Wait. Lita. I need you to read this one last letter. I wrote it to you, but I never got the courage to actually send it to you." His deep blue optics bore into her spark. She could only nod. Optimus gathered the data-pad and held it out in front of her.

Lover,

I have wanted to tell you this secret for as long as I can remember, but I am a coward. It's something that scares me almost as much as it will scare you, but I have to say it. I'm sorry that I'm not mech enough to tell this to you faceplate to faceplate. I want you to have my sparklings.

There. I've finally admitted it. I've wanted you to carry my sparklings since the first time I saw you. Every time I see you laid out under me, I can't help but long for a little one. I want to merge my spark with yours and know that we will together make a little spark. I know that you're not ready yet, but I have to get this off my chest.

It's always been a dream of mine, Lita. I long to watch you waddle around our apartments, frame heavy with a sparkling. I want to watch as your body changes to sustain a sparkling. I want to be the one to feed you when you need energon. I want to be the one who kneads your backplates when they get sore. I want to be with you as you deliver our sparkling.

I have visions of you holding a beautiful blue femme. She's always the most gorgeous thing, Lita. She looks exactly like you, but she has my optics. Even if we do have a little mech, I would be so thrilled. I would be the happiest mech in the world if I could hold both a piece of you and a piece of me.

I'm sorry to spring this on you, love. But, you have to understand that my need to have a sparkling is becoming all encompassing. I promise that you will enjoy every single time we try for a sparkling. I'll make sure of that. Please think on it, love. But, please make sure that you want it with your spark. I would never forgive myself if you were unhappy by my hand. Please let me know what you think.

~Your love

Elita's hand crept up to her throat. She tossed a look up at her mate, who stared down at her with absolute adoration shining in his optics.

"How long ago did you write that letter, darling?" Elita asked Optimus, letting her hand leave her throat to creep up to greet her mate's faceplate.

"Quite some time ago. I believe I had written it shortly before the battle at Tyger Pax." He said, stroking her hip with a few strong fingers. He was amazed that she wasn't panicking or cursing at him. Maybe they really will getting older and mellowing out.

"Why didn't you send it to me?" She asked softly, still caressing him.

"I was scared you would attempt to remove my interface appliance."

"Optimus!"

"What? It's true." Optimus smiled down at the little femme lounging against his chestplates. She was so utterly beautiful. She made him want to throw her down on the berth and make love to her for hours. But, that was a pretty normal reaction for him.

"I would not have harmed your interface in any way. I may have temporarily tried to offline it, but I wouldn't have removed it entirely. I love it far too much that," She said with a giggle, trying to shimmy out of his arms when he chuckled and squeezed her gently, pulling her back against his panel.

"Is that the only thing about me you love?" He asked, suddenly becoming still and silent. There was a slight pause while Elita turned to look at her sparkmate.

"Of course not, Optimus," She paused, looking self-consciously towards the wall. "I would also love a sparkling of ours." Optimus's arms squeezed her even harder and his helm dipped down to bury itself in her neck. The large mech shook lightly. She gently pressed his helm out from her neckplates and kissed him softly. To feel and see such a large mech coming apart at the seams from happiness made her spark soar.

"Well then, Optimus. We have tons of work ahead of ourselves if we want that sparkling. Get to it, boss." With a sly grin, Elita hopped off the berth and walked to the shower, sensually shaking her hips as she went. Optimus was powerless, following his femme like she was made of the sweetest energon.

"Your wish is my command, commander."

XXXX

Next chapter we have sparkling making. Yay! I love it so very much. Please review, if you liked it.