Beck's POV: "I wonder what Tori was thinking about when she spaced out on us?" I thought to myself as I was waiting for Jade to get her lunch. I don't want to admit it to anyone, but ever since Tori came to HA I started feeling different about my relationship with Jade. I mean, Jade was my first love, first actual girlfriend, first kiss… she was my first everything. I've been in a steady relationship with her for a year and 10 months, and she's acted exactly the same towards me since the very first day we met.
When I thought about our history together, I realized a crucial piece of information: in the entire time we've been together, Jade has never done a single nice thing for me. Unless, of course, you count giving me a can of lemonade for my birthday to be an act of kindness… I really hate how cruel Jade acts towards Tori, and if I say anything she accuses me of cheating on her with Tori.
I almost feel trapped or suffocated when I'm with Jade, but when I'm with Tori, I feel… free. While I won't tell anyone about this, I have sometimes fantasized about being in a relationship with Tori, and every time I didn't like what I saw; I loved what I saw. The farthest I've let the fantasy go is when Tori and I get married and have children; having children and possibly marriage is something I won't ever experience if I stay with Jade.
Jade absolutely hates children, and if I know anything about Jade, (which sadly I do), she would never want to do something that traditionally involves her father's presence. And when I think of how I want my marriage ceremony to go, I always imagine it in the most traditional setting possible.
Tori has the best relationship ever with both her parents, and they already adore me. The only remotely bad thing I can think of that would come out of my marriage to Victoria Vega would be something that happened almost 18 years ago: Trina Vega. I know deep down that if things were ever to get to that point between Tori and I, I'll love her so much I'll learn how to like Trina.
"Beck? Beck!" Jade screamed pulling me out of my reverie. I looked and smiled thanking God she couldn't read my mind, "Hey Jade". She rolled her eyes like always and continued to eat her salad as I slipped back into my fantasy world. I could easily imagine Tori and myself together. I could kiss goodbye the idea of having any of the things I want like children and a traditional marriage if I planned on having a future with Jade. I mean, I really care about her, but sometimes I just don't know what I ever saw in her. Then other times, I remember every exact detail.
When Jade and I first met, it was my first day at Hollywood Arts and Jade, being a year-long veteran to the school and immediately taking a shine to me like all the other ladies I've come into contact with, decided to show me around. By the time lunch came, we were making out in the hallway and I was carrying her books to the classes I didn't know the location of.
I remember thinking she was the most beautiful girl I'd ever met. Looking back now, I realize I spoke too soon. The day I met Victoria Vega, the thought of Jade being the most beautiful girl I'd ever met became outdated. Tori erased everything I knew about being smooth, calm, and collected around a girl. I was lucky she didn't think anything of it. But sadly, while Tori herself was completely oblivious to my minor infatuation with her, which is turning more major with each hair flip, long look, and soft touch, Jade is all too aware.
Every time I look at Tori I see everything I've ever wanted. And every time I look into Jade's eyes, I see no soul, passion, or life. Instead, I see hate, anger, frustration, and underneath it all and almost completely undetectable, fear. That's the main reason I haven't broken up with Jade: because I'm afraid she'll do something terribly drastic. I wouldn't have to worry about that if I was with anyone else, including Tori, which is why I'm planning out what to say when I call Jade over to "talk".
"Hey Jade?" I calmly asked, not wanting to upset her until it would be inevitable. She looked up at me for the first time since she caught me looking at Tori in Sikowitz's class, "What," she replied in her usual flat-tone that currently, I was grateful for. "I was wondering, babe, could you come over to my place tonight? I kind of wanted to talk to you…" I hoped with everything I had that she wouldn't ask why we couldn't discuss it now. "Why can't we talk now?" she responded not only inquisitive, but suspicious as always.
Some times I feel like I know Jade a little too well, yet don't know how to use this information. "Umm, I don't think here's the best place. It's kind of a private matter." I hoped so hard I actually crossed my fingers under the table. Knowing Jade, she'll push the subject until she hears what she wants. Not what you wanted to say, but what she wanted to hear. "Well I'm sure whatever it is, it can be discussed among others," she said with a smile on her face that, if I'm being honest, was quite frightening.
I threw my hands in the air, deciding to give up, "Fine. You want to know what I wanted to tell you?" She looked shocked at my boldness, but frankly I didn't care, "Yes, Beck. I'd love to hear what you wanted to tell me, what that private matter was. Please continue," she responded cockily. I realized that we not only had a small audience, but also the eye and ear of every person at the café. "Jade, I'm breaking up with you," I replied very bluntly.
The look on her face was completely terrifying. The look in her eyes was absolutely paralyzing. But I knew it had to be done. "What?" she half calmly, half insanely asked me. "You heard me, Jade. I'm breaking up with you… for another girl I've had my eye on for a while," I announced to not only Jade, but to our small crowd as well. At that moment, I realized that if jade was as smart as I thought she was, Tori should not be walking towards us, but running in the very opposite direction.
And as soon as I finished that thought, it was proven correct as Jade turned slowly towards the approaching Tori. She looked completely calm… until she screamed at the top of her lungs the last name of the beautiful girl that took my breath away.
"VEGA!"