Sun was setting in Mongolia, ending the cool day and bringing in an even colder night. Not that there was anything up here to experience it: the only living thing in these mountains was down below, and none of them much cared about the positions of the celestial objects at the moment anyway.
It was pretty darn cold, whether the sun was up or not, where its light never reached.
From beyond the mist, the lantern light bathing their face in gold after decades of darkness, emerged a group of large warriors, guardians of this vault. They looked so real that the three masters nearly took their battle stances before they saw that the enemy was, indeed, made of stone, and would not make a move against them. All horses, they appeared to wear simple armor and wield spears or hammers, each a unique individual with his own size, shape, mane, and face. Unmoving stone eyes staring into nothingness, placed to both sides of the tunnel.
Mantis seemed somewhat happier than it may have been appropriate down here, but Crane was more impassive and reminded his fellow master of such: "Don't count your coins yet: the stories also say they move."
Indeed, these did not. They appeared to pay no heed whatsoever to the intruders walking past them, further into the cold darkness.
They found some unused torches, and upon lighting them up, were mercifully granted some extra light to look around with, albeit it being still very, very cold. It was a narrow stone passage, carved rather than natural, with tales of adventure and conquest engraved on the walls. They told their own story of the "weaklings of China, that deserved to be trampled down by true strength," as well as the great demons of the Demon Valley, each capable of single-handedly destroying a horde of conquerors, "nine tenths of us falling, the rest fleeing for their lives from the fury of these beasts."
Master Oogway himself, as they saw, was given special attention. The great battle between himself and Zhanglian Khan covered an entire wall: it depicted a clearly demonic and villainous turtle, utilizing black magics and demonic forces, triumphing over the horse conqueror, who was depicted as a large, handsome, and heroic figure. "And so our lord and champion fell in battle against this creature of great evil, but he was not truly dead, for we brought him here, to the secret temple he had built for himself, and performed ancient rites so that he could one day I SEE YOU"
Crane, who was reading the text, was taken by surprise and had nary a half of a second to dodge the sudden blast of cold, breathed by the stone engraving of the great Khan. Even being in the proximity of the trap was enough to make him shiver: the opposite wall, taking the full brunt of the chill, was instantly covered with ice and frost. The other two turned to look at him as they all heard, from down below, a vast rumbling sound.
"Crane, what did you just do?", Shifu inquired in alarm.
"Nothing!", the student responded. "I just read at this thing here, and then suddenly it..."
He trailed off as the wind from down below, once again, brought the howling. It sounded like it was saying something, but none of them could discern what it was, and soon both it and the rumbling ceased, returning the place to silence once again. The torches were nearly extinguished before the gust died out a little, back to the level it used to be, though never went away entirely. And they could all swear it had become colder.
"How can it be so cold down here, anyway?", Mantis wondered. "You'd think it'd be warmer than up there."
"Dark forces are afoot," Shifu noted grimly, as he limped on along the passage. "Let's move on. I don't think any of us want to spend any longer here than it is absolutely necessary..."
"Did that count as a trap?", Mantis asked Crane, pointing at the mouth of the horse, that had blown the cold blast a minute earlier. The avian just shrugged: "Let's wait for a couple more first."
They needn't wait for long. The pathway soon began to descend, and circle, in an ancient staircase that took them even further below into the abyss of the accursed vaults. The torches fluttered in the wind and painted strange, dancing shapes to the walls, oddly like the shadows of galloping horse warriors, or so they thought.
It felt to them all that they were expected now, though by what, they did not like to think about. The wind would still occasionally bring up voices - clatter, rumbling, cackles, neighs... - although for the most part it was, mercifully enough, silent.
Next, just a little bit after the staircase had stopped and they were in a corridor once more, the clatter came from somewhere much closer, and a sound of drawn steel. "Ooh, I wonder what that means...?", Mantis asked, though all of them could very easily guess. He just figured this was a step closer to winning a bet.
Besides, the skeletons of many animals littering the entire hallway told their own message.
A loud whoosh followed as the pole, with a large blade at the end of it, swung down from the ceiling and towards the masters. Meant for a man much larger than him, Mantis needn't even dodge, just letting it fly above his head: Crane and Shifu were of the correct size, meanwhile, but also much too fast and skilled to be hit. It just went past them and a while more before stopping, the forces of gravity conspiring to turn it back for another go.
"That counts!", the insect continued, and Crane admitted him in being correct. "All right, the vain and paranoid warlord put some traps to defend his treasure," he stated matter-of-factly as he dodged another blade. "Well predicted."
There were many more, but none would deter Master Shifu now that he had actually bothered himself to come this far. He skillfully evaded the many swinging blades, jumping and flipping and moving past as if they were not there at all. The floor and the walls were full of holes, from which more cold steam blew at him, along with arrows and spears, but even as one murderhole would bring out its deadly gifts, he was already like three holes ahead. Spiked pits were no issue whatsoever as long as he had Oogway's staff to stand on: it was thrice as long as any spike down there. Beartraps and banana peels were abundant, but not difficult to sidestep once they knew where they were.
Zhanglian Khan was clearly a very thorough man, but clearly not enough so to kill the three masters. "It's just like back in the training hall!", Crane exclaimed, almost nostalgic, as he stepped aside from a razor-sharp spinning blade, briefly appearing from a tiny crack in the wall, in an effort to cut something soft and fleshy, before going right back to hiding, disappointed.
The pathway widened soon after, until they could no longer see the walls on their left or right side, nor the ceiling. Indeed, even the floor itself disappeared in front of them, replaced by a massive stone staircase, heading down. Naturally, after the experience in the corridor, none of them stepped on it without expecting another trap - and as such were not disappointed when it suddenly vanished, with a heavy clack, turning into a slippery slide down into the abyss. Full of more spinning blades, of course.
Crane was the first one down, on account of flying, and lit up the bottom of the this time quite natural cave, as well as the strange lump in the darkness, for the other two. "Hey, I think I found something..."
Upon closer examination, it appeared to be a large headless corpse, dressed in ancient, ragged robes. Its flesh and skin had long since decayed, leaving nothing but old bones, bleached white as snow. An explorer, not unlike the three of them, that had clearly been to the staircase as well but performed less admirably, possibly blaming his much larger size, no smaller than a horse.
"Master Charging Rhino!", Shifu exclaimed. "So he did find the vault, after all. But where is his...?"
"Found it," Mantis chirped in, ten feet away from the rest of the body, nudging a skeletal head of a rhino. "Whatever got him, got him real well."
"I did not mean his head," Shifu said as he searched the corpse. "I was talking about... aha!" He smiled as he picked up and lifted what was, or so it appeared anyway, a short wooden stick, less than a foot long. But upon tweaking its end a little, it suddenly extended into almost twice the length of an average rhino, with a steel blade in one end.
"Is that the Collapsible Spear of Glory?", Crane asked carefully, watching the thing unfold, and then fold again as Shifu tweaked it another time. "It has been lost for centuries!"
"And now, it has been found!" He pocketed the rod, and turned to watch at the body solemnly, even as Mantis returned its head to its rough position. "Master Charging Rhino took it with him when he left to search for the vault: its recovery, and that of his body if we have the chance to take it with us too, will make this journey worthwhile all by itself."
They were in a large cave now, but it had more torches to light up, and they soon improved their visibility within a great deal. And as more and more light sources illuminated the area, they revealed an astonishing sight indeed: before them, numbering thousands and filling the entire hall, were statues, like the few they had seen by the door. Again, most were horses, although they could see some bulls, rhinos, and other large creatures among them - all distinctive and unique. It was like an entire army of stone was keeping this place as its headquarters.
"Suddenly," Mantis began, as they moved amongst the silent guardians, to reach the other side, "I don't feel like I might want to win the bet anymore."
He received no answer, and soon the vault descended back into silence, only an occasional footstep or staff hitting the ground being heard, echoing almost unnaturally all over. They could not see the other end, even if they lit up more torches and other light sources as they went, so vast was this place, so full of statues. They were in a very good shape, and their eyes seemed almost like full of life... almost following the three masters with their gaze, as they passed.
And even now the temperature continued to descend, the cold fog covering the ground throughout, and a gentle, if similarly chilling wind constantly blew at them from an unknown source, though it carried no voices with it this time.
Finally, after a much longer walk than they had anticipated, the end of the vast stone army came to an end. Here there was another staircase, heading up this time, and much longer than the last one. There were torches lined up on both sides: as Mantis moved on to light up one, the others instantly flared into life as well, bathing the entire pathway in a dim play of light and shadows. Crane took flight once more, reaching the top before the rest of them, whereas Masters Shifu and Mantis both ascended on foot, taking great care for any more traps or other tricks.
Surprisingly, there were none.
Once again, Crane was the first to reach the end of it, fly his way to the summit of this great staircase, but this time around, he did not call for the rest of them. Indeed, he would not respond at all until Shifu, concerned, called for him. "Master Crane!"
"I am here," he calmly answered. "This is quite a sight... come and check it out."
Crane saw gold. Wherever the light of his lamp hit, it was reflected away by the vast piles of treasure, veritable mountains of riches stolen from China all those centuries ago. Once again, he could not see the end of them, the large majority of the entire room cast in shadows. Shifu and Mantis reached up soon after, lighting more with their torches, revealing more gold and gems to glimmer back at them.
"Impressive...", Shifu gasped. "This is truly all, and more, we have read about this place existing."
"I would say it would count as mountains," Mantis added. "Would you, Crane?"
"I suppose," the bird conceded. "You have this one. There's way more than we could carry, anyway."
"Yes, but I doubt we need that much for Master Tigress," Shifu added, taking out his sack. "Let's take what we can, then head back home. We can always come back again, with a larger force, to claim the rest."
The others agreed, and it took them no time whatsoever to fill all their bags and containers with gold and jewelry, initially ill-earned and now being returned to China. Both Crane and Shifu made a preference over gems, rings, and other items of historical or artistic value, rather than just plain gold. Mantis, who had no sack of his own, instead took his time to explore the vault further, investigate the furthest reaches where their torchlight had not carried before.
Minutes later, his voice echoed across the halls: "Uh... guys! You might want to come over here for a bit."
When they did, they found him standing on the edge of a large stone coffin, hidden between many piles of gold. He was looking down inside.
There, within, lay the body of a massive horse indeed. He must have been a strong and muscular one in life, visible even now that all had decayed away but his skeleton. He may have been wrapped in burial shrouds when he first had died, but those had likewise long since rotted, leaving him bare. On top of him, gripped by both hands, there was a large stone hammer, almost a maul, adorned with runes of power. 'Twas the final resting place of the great Khan, and though he was long deceased and clearly harmless, he struck everybody with concern and doubt - certainly so much more than he would have when he was alive.
There was no mist within the casket, although it surrounded it entirely from all sides. The wind had died out: whatever voices it used to carry with it earlier, ceased. For a good while, the three masters merely regarded the body, and each other, and the treasure piles, wordlessly. Tension was mounting up in silence.
"So he really was found and buried here...", Mantis muttered. "Interesting."
"But creepy," Crane added.
"This is no vault at all," Shifu stated matter-of-factly. "This is a tomb. Stolen as this treasure may be, it really would be for the best if we did not tarry any longer than we absolutely have to."
"Here's an idea," Crane began with faked cheer. "How about we left right now?"
The others heartily agreed. But even as they turned away to make their way out of this place, a loud crash carried to their ears from whence they had come... rumbling, clatter of weapons, and then, what sounded horribly like marching. And not merely a small force, but thousands, perhaps tens of. All coming at their direction. "...You have got to be kidding me," Crane moaned.
Whoever he thought might have been kidding, clearly was not. Mere minute later, the first lines of the stone warriors marched into sight, weapons at the ready, preparing to confront the intruders. They said nothing, nor shouted battle cries, but rather simply approached without a word, making no other noise than the thundering of their feet, marching in unison.
"Here we are, then," Crane sighed, and dejectedly took a battle-stance. "This really is going to suck, isn't it?"
"More so if we do not fight: prepare yourself!" Shifu was the first to attack, Oogway's cane striking straight through stone and piercing the head of the first in line. It crumbled down, lifeless.
More and more came after the first, the endless stone hordes being thrown at the three by an invisible mystical force. Two spears were thrusted at Crane, but although these stone creatures were many, they were still not flesh, not alive, and their movements were slow and clumsy - trivial to avoid even for someone that was not a kung fu master, and easy to counterattack for someone that was. Stone shattered and heavy bodies were kicked back.
"This reminds me of the battle of the Weeping River!", Mantis exclaimed, even as he charged to the the enemy ranks, kicking into stone and breaking sculpted faces. They were not deterred, attempting to surround him and run him through with their spears, but Shifu and Crane were soon there to support him, pushing back the enemy lines.
A blast of green light struck through one stone warrior, as Shifu broke it with a powerful burst of chi. Its pieces and rubble were thrown behind and everywhere. "Only this time we are not at full strength," he responded to Mantis, "and the enemy numbers are all the bigger. The situation is growing dire."
"We need to get out." Crane kicked two soldiers aside from him, then spread his wings. "Both of you, grab on my feet and hold o-"
"THIEVES..."
Everything froze. If it was still possible that the air could become even colder, it did. The voice echoed from behind like a ghostly wail from beyond death, carrying with it a prospect of doom in the hands of that who was not supposed to be in any shape to deliver it anymore. The statues stopped attacking and stepped back, apparently in reverence, whereas the three intruders ceased hostilities more because of utter disbelief and shock. "Impossible," Shifu muttered.
From the very edge of their field of vision, at the back of the vault, a shape slowly made its way out of its stone casket. It was easy to see in spite of being back there, and being covered in mist, for it was a large thing, and it had two small sources of red glow from top of it, unmistakeably eyes. It walked slowly towards them, wielding a hammer on its hand, even the gold and gems all around them developing frost as the temperature continued to decrease.
Zhanglian Khan stepped fully into their sights, regarding them with a cold in his red eyes, breathing freezing mist, each snort of anger bursting a small cloud that stiffened their flesh with frost. When he spoke, his voice echoed across the vault like a thunder, the tone cold like from the grave: "Who are ye... that walk in my hall, as if it were... thine home? Stealing... my treasure? Accursed thieves...!"
Mantis was the first to recover from the surprise of being addressed by a dead person. "Hey, you stole from us first!"
Even as they conversed, the statue warriors kept their distance but arranged themselves around the three, to surround them. All the masters maintained their battle positions. The Khan breathed in and out, seeming to be in contemplation, before answering: "...So... you come from the land... of cowards, weaklings, and... dark wizards...? I merely took thine wealth... for you were too weak to hold it yourself... I was in the right to take it...!"
"But then, by the same logic, couldn't we just take your stuff as well?", Crane pointed out. "Since it just means you were too weak to hold on to it..."
And this time, cutting off the last part of the avian's argument, the long-dead conqueror actually laughed. Perhaps, one day in the past, it could have been a hearty, amused chuckle, right now it was downright uncanny, bringing goosebumps to their flesh and bristling their fur. "Ye regard yourself as strong enough... to steal from me, the great Zhanglian Khan...? Show me... then... how shall ye just take my wealth and... leave...!"
He had barely had the time to end his sentence before the statues once again flared to life, and advanced, even as their commander stepped back to let his lackeys perform the execution. Spears harried them from all directions, but neither Crane nor Mantis were there anymore, one having gone above, the other below: even as the latter punched and kicked their feet, forcing them to turn their weapons at him instead of pointing them towards the threat from the air, the former seized the opportunity to dive in without being skewered, squashing stone flat against the ground. Living statues were kicked aside, above, and to all other directions, spears and hammers split in twain or more parts.
Those choosing to engage Master Shifu instead were doing little better. Be it one, six, or score spears thrust at him at once, the tar-like and mechanical attacks were much too slow to have any hope to hit the red panda: where a spear came, there was but air. Where a hammer fell, it instead struck the face of a comrade, the old master having moved on long since. Many fell.
But although this was the usual strategy employed by him, simply throwing in bodies until the enemy fell, the great Khan did have a rudimentary sense of tactics. Upon seeing that this would take rather long and cost him many men - unliving as they might have been - a single word was uttered, and his forces backed away.
"What did he just say?", Mantis asked. "I didn't quite hear."
"I think it was 'archers'," responded Crane.
"Oh. Well, that's no good."
As two ranks of statues spread apart and got out of the way, they revealed a number of warriors armed with crude bows, and quivers full of arrows, taking aim. A volley was fired at Shifu, another towards Crane, and although most of them naturally missed, or were deflected, it would not be all: Crane was dropped from the sky into the midst of them, from which great sounds of battle were soon heard as statues flew out in many pieces. Afterwards, the archers never had the chance for another shot before Mantis was right at the rest, kicking them aside and apart. They attempted to retreat again, clearing the field for more bows, but their enemy knew better now and would not give them the chance: Mantis was faster than them by a fair bit, as was Crane - even with an arrow sticking out of his wing - and could easily keep up with the speed.
A number more were taking aim at Shifu again, who had received no worse than grazes from the last one, but they were thwarted by one of their own being thrown at them at a high speed, crushing two of them in the resulting shockwave - swiftly followed by a kung fu master throwing himself into the fray at an even higher velocity, intent on prodding a wooden staff through their eyes, breaking whatever magic was allowing them to move. Even if he had not the time or momentum to break every statue on his way, he at least did his best to shatter their weapons instead, rendering them harmless nonetheless. Those were the lucky ones: the unlucky individuals were directly on his way, and leisurely kicked asunder.
But even then, it was nothing but prolonging the inevitable, no better than a fly fighting off an avalanche: even as hundreds of the statue warriors fell, there were always more to take their place, thousands upon thousands. Even now, they were being worn out, slow but steady, and they could never withstand against the entire mass of the enemy and emerge victorious: they would tire before that, and make a fatal mistake.
Even in his old age, Master Shifu was a great master. And though he was facing many, many foes, they were largely unworthy of his attention. They could not even surprise him, let alone actually touch him, not until he would wear himself out, which would not happen in a while yet. But Zhanglian Khan himself was another matter entirely: when the old red panda turned around to face the next attacker that had tried to catch him off-guard, he saw no slow statue, but rather the undead emperor, who had apparently crossed a fair bit of distance in a very short time. And perhaps even more importantly, he saw the hammer quickly approaching his face.
The quick flash of intense pain against his skull, throwing him back into the floor, was the last thing he felt before he lost his senses and consciousness, even if for but a brief moment.
Cold.
That was his first thought when he came to, his mind at least halfway functional once more. It was so very cold. The ground under his hand felt frozen as he tried to push himself upright, to continue the battle, to survive. Howling winds passed through him and pierced into the marrow of his old bones, feeding on whatever remained of his will to go on, to fight, threatening to have him fall back down and not get up again. His head ached, everything his eyes saw was blur, no matter how he tried to concentrate on the moving shapes around him. A voice echoed through his ears, like it came from somewhere far away. It felt vaguely familiar, though he could not really concentrate on exactly who it sounded like, and had an alarmed, warning sound: "Master!"
He managed to turn his head to his right, upwards from the floor, and saw the swiftly approaching shape of a vast stone hammer, aimed at his head. Who wielded that hammer, he could not see from all the blur, nor could he entirely remember either. But he did remember something clearly, nonetheless: why he was here, and who it was that he was here for. If there had been the time for it, if the hammer would have come a second or two later, he would have groaned in deep exasperation and annoyance.
The things he did for his daughter...
Above, the one wielding the hammer, an undead being of great power, his face decayed away but his eyes still full of hatred and rage. Below, the target of the weapon's trajectory, its wielder's attentions, an old man of surprising calmness considering his situation. His eyes were closed, and his breath deep and serene.
A hand rose up to meet the hammer.
Inner peace.
The weapon had none of the effect anyone present, apart from Master Shifu perhaps, had anticipated. Instead of breaking apart the hand opposing it, and the person owning the hand, the hammer was stopped in its tracks by the small hand with its frail fingers. Master Crane, worried over the life of his own teacher, sighed in relief and nonchalantly kicked aside another statue that was trying to strike him, breaking its head in pieces. "You know, I get the feeling I really should learn that," Mantis noted.
The hammer swung around once, from its tip, and so did the one that allegedly wielded the thing, picking up speed before being tossed to the ceiling, screaming.
"You couldn't," Crane simply responded.
Even as they watched, Shifu flipped the hammer around and wielded its haft, swung around one more time, and threw it up as well. There was a loud clang, and crash, from up above.
Seconds after, something big fell down, followed by a fair amount of rocks.
At last, after many centuries, the great Khan had gone to true peace. His physical remains had fallen somewhere behind the first ranks of the men of stone, buried under land and boulders that his body and the hammer had dislodged. With him gone, the remaining thousands of the unliving warriors fell silent, and stopped their relentless assault, finally giving the three masters some peace: perhaps it had been Zhanglian Khan's undead influence that kept them moving to begin with?
"That's good," Mantis said.
Silence fell once again, but persisted mere seconds only before more began to fall with a loud rumble. Was his presence why this place could exist, too? Or was it simply that the impact suffered by the ceiling was a great deal more serious than anyone had thought it would? Whatever the reason, it was to their alarm that more rocks began falling down, from little pebbles to vast boulders. The entire chamber shook, a sudden earthquake striking into the hapless cave, determined to collapse it entirely.
"That's bad," Mantis said.
In retrospect, upon mulling the common tropes and events regarding underground lairs with evil supernatural inhabitants, this outcome was a virtual certainty. Crane made sure Shifu was all right, and to his relief found that such was the case. "We need to leave right away," he declared, "before we are also buried here!" More stone fell to enforce his decision, but while he and Crane prepared to leave, Mantis instead headed back to the end of the place.
"Just give me one second!", he called to them. "I want to check on something I saw."
Even as the piles of treasure crumbled down, the other two followed him to see just what he was up to, and found him jumping on the casket, then not inside it, but behind it. A second later he returned, carrying a small and ornate box, smiling even as more rocks fell.
"What could there be that made this worth it?", Crane asked even as they all fled to the trapped hallway, which was also collapsing. Thankfully, this had made most of the traps defunct, not that they would have had too much trouble evading them anyhow.
"The greatest treasure in the world!", the insect responded even as he dodged a falling blade trap. "This was hidden separately from everything else, and put in a fancy box! It's definitely it!"
"Would you two just stop it with that bet already?", Shifu exclaimed exasperated, ducking as a flying sawblade went over his head and nearly took off a half of his ears. "It was stupid to begin with!"
"Well, yes, but don't you think, Master, that Zhanglian Khan's greatest treasure would not be an interesting thing to find out about anyway?", Mantis pointed out.
"Not interesting enough to die for! Let's just focus on getting out of here in one piece, and then we may perhaps open your mystery box!"
This was still easier said than done, given the circumstances: there was very little room for them to maneuver in the corridor, and though the traps were not functional anymore for the most part, they instead had to deal with the problem of falling rock and boulders. Oftentimes they had to stop and smash them out of their way, so cramped had the way become that even Mantis had trouble getting through.
Worse still, they soon found that the spiral staircase had collapsed, and Crane was not yet capable of flight, thanks to the arrow. A kung fu master's body is capable of very rapid healing, thanks to the powerful chi reserves enhancing their physical shell in all ways, but even that technique could only heal so fast: it had its limits, and three minutes was far too little. He was not much of a jumper or climber, but he would now have to adapt to the situation and try his best: thankfully, he had two much more agile leapers there to help him up.
Unfortunately, there were not many stepping stones in the forms of falling rocks, meaning they had to find other, less awesome ways to get up. Such as just plain climbing.
Naturally, the very last tunnel was also the one that had practically collapsed entirely. There was just barely enough room for them all to crawl through, and they had to do so while being afraid of a horrible crushing death. Thankfully, they had Mantis with them to keep the entire thing up until everybody had gotten through. And likewise thankfully, as soon as they had gotten past it, they found that the door itself was entirely intact, and that the caves after it were largely smooth sailing.
It was dead at night outside, and, in comparison to the underworld, strangely warm. Now that the constant threat of dying had finally gone away, them no longer needing to run or fight in order to stay alive, the adrenaline rush going away and replacing with a warm and rather pleasant shudder of weariness all throughout their muscles, all three instantly collapsed to the ground and did not move for a good while.
Crane began to laugh, partly out of the sheer joy of being alive, but mostly for no reason whatsoever, starting with just a low chuckle but eventually ending as a loud cackle of madness. "Have you gone completely insane?", Mantis asked.
"I don't know..." He wiped tears out of his eyes. "Maybe?"
They were not entirely sure how long they spent just lying there. It was likely they fell asleep at some moment or another, for when they once again perceived their surroundings, it was morning. Every place ached: they were full of bruises, cuts, broken bones, arrow-wounds, and warts. "I should have brought my needles," Mantis moaned, as he stretched and rubbed his back.
But as much pain as there had been involved, they had gotten out with two sacks full of treasure, a long-lost ancient relic, and a hitherto sealed box that promised to have the greatest of them all. To these they now turned their attention, with little else to turn it to anyway. "Our efforts, I think," Shifu began, "have not gone in vain: these should be more than enough to pay for the dowry, and the wedding, in its entirety!"
"And the palace roof," Crane added.
"And the palace roof," Mantis agreed.
It was Shifu who first remembered the box. "So, what could be inside this thing, anyway?", he wondered, holding it in his hands and turning it around. "What would be the most valued treasure of a world-conquering warlord?"
The other two gathered around the item as well, eyeing it. "Obviously it was some great and valuable gem," Mantis guessed.
"No no, a magical charm of luck!", Crane exclaimed. "How else could he have managed so far into China?"
The opening of the box was a far more solemn event than it may have had any right to be. The removal of the seals, then the act of pulling the lid, both took longer than they should have and with much more festivity. Finally, the way was clear for three pairs of eyes to look within, see what had caused such a fuss before, and what was revealed to them was...
Mantis groaned. "Out of all bloody things..."
For what they saw was, in fact, their own faces, reflected from a very ornate and well-made silver mirror. It was a very well-preserved and flawless work of art, with not a single fracture, and lined with what appeared to be runed ebony. From the reflection, they observed their own weariness and wrinkles under their eyes, and watched each other blink and frown.
"Oh, now I finally understand!", Crane mocked. "We came all this way to find a dowry for Master Tigress, and yet we never realized, the dowry was in our hearts all along!"
"I really would not have expected Zhanglian Khan to understand this kind of matters," Shifu added, puzzled, "what with all the conquering and such matters."
"Well, the stories did say he was also incredibly vain." Mantis shrugged. "Maybe he just liked looking at his own face?"
"That works," said Crane, flexing his wing and preparing to take flight towards home, but was stopped by Mantis.
"Aren't you forgetting something...?"
"...What?"
"Our bet." He seemed pretty happy, probably less because of the money and more because of the sheer joy of one-upping his friend. "Piles of treasure, stone warriors, vicious traps, the great Khan's body, his Greatest Treasure ever... we saw them all!"
"No, we did not," Crane pointed out. "We never found the voodoo doll, now did we?"
Mantis's face fell. "Oh come on, that was, like, one story, ever!"
"It still counts." It was as if the smile had jumped from the insect's face and onto the avian's. "But thank you for reminding me: I believe you owe me five gold pieces."
By the time Mantis grudgingly paid him the money, and he took off with the other one hanging from his leg, Shifu was already far off. Frankly, after all the stuff he had been through, he thought it would be reasonable that he wanted to go home as soon as possible, take a long bath, then attend to the wedding of his adopted daughter.