Chapter 3 – Operate

"Afraid that would happen! Donna's been through a lot lately but I think this is a first!" said the doctor in the pin-stripe suit.

Martin Ellingham took up a vial of smelling salts, opened it, and waved it under the woman's nose. She came around quickly and found Doctor Ellingham bending over her, looking intently at her eyes. "You fainted. Done that before?"

Donna Noble ran a shaky hand over her face. "No. Never." She tried to sit up but the GP pushed her head back down, placing a pillow under her neck.

"Stay." Martin took her blood pressure. "A bit low. You lie right there." He cranked up the end of the bed to elevate her feet and legs.

Doctor Smith, or whatever his name was, fiddled with the metallic thing in his hand and it emitted a low hum and a bright green glow. "Let me adjust the…"

Martin regarded his strange assistant. "You really are mad, aren't you?"

The man grinned at him hugely, his front teeth almost totally showing. "Depends on your viewpoint, now don't it. Ages ago, I might have been seen as a wizard, or a witch."

He twirled a knob on the thing he was holding and Martin craned his neck to see what he was doing. "What are you fiddling at with your laser pointer?"

Smith laughed. "Not a laser pointer, Martin. Well I could use it as that, but it tends to run the battery flat though. But as I was saying," he bent his head over the woman on the exam couch, "in another age I might be seen as a witch, or a god, or a rather backward and ancient man of some learning."

Martin turned his head at a sniffle and found Donna to be weeping, tears gushing down her cheeks.

When she saw the doctor looking at her, she blew up. "I'm lying here, sick as a dog, my arm all swollen up while you two are bickering, back and forth like an old married couple. I can't be pregnant! I haven't had… uhm… been with a man… well…"

"Since when?" asked the GP. "Need to get a urine sample. A test will confirm it."

"Well," the woman sniffed. "Since before my wedding and that turned out soooo well!" she said sarcastically. "I hope that bastard Lance lived all the way until he hit bottom… Oh sorry."

"Donna's a little upset, you see…" said Smith.

Martin interrupted him. "You're not married then?" He hadn't seen a ring on her hand.

She looked up at him. "No! I'm not married. And there's no way I could be preggers!" I mean," she gave a long look at Smith. "We never."

"Nah," added Smith. "We're best mates, aren't we Donna?"

"Yeah, I suppose," she said oddly. "I'm not pregnant! No way! In spite of what your sonic says, Doctor, I'm not pregnant! How come it says I am?"

Smith looked at the object in his hand, and it was the largest and most elaborate laser pointer Martin had ever seen. "Ah, I see," Smith cried. "I've got the notch filter on. Donna! Sorry, old thing! Now if you were a Cytherian Horta or a Slythene Titanask, it would have been right." He pointed the thing at her again while it hummed and glowed.

"You two are completely barmy, aren't you?" sighed Martin. "So what particular asylum did you escape from? And was your treatment through Home Care?" He crossed his arms, fuming about the waste of his time. He was once more reaching for the telephone when Smith rapped him across the knuckles.

"Half a tick, Doc! See?" He flashed the electronic thing in front of his eyes, where Martin saw a tiny screen crawling with strange markings. Smith pointed a slim finger at it. "Right there? See that beige line, where it intersects the… no, I suppose you'd not know what that means, would you?"

Martin harrumphed. "No," he said frostily.

"Donna!" shouted Smith, his narrow face showing all his teeth again. "You're not pregnant. Well, not most of you. Just your hand!"

"Her hand?" shouted Martin, as Donna looked up in astonishment.

"My hand?" Her stunned eyes flew one man to the other and back. "So you're sayin' that my hand… is PREGNANT! My bloody hand?"

"Yes," said Smith. "I don't think a urine test would work martin. You see by now the parasite will have attached itself to blood vessels…"

Donna screamed out, "Parasite?" and collapsed once more.

"Yeah, Doc," Smith went on, as Martin applied the smelling salts again to the stricken woman. "If you could operate and remove it? Should be straight forward for a former surgeon such as yourself! What do you say? Just a bit of snip – snip?"

Doctor Martin Ellingham felt himself break out in a cold sweat as his stomach roiled with nausea while Smith stood grinning at him over the examination couch.

Author's notes:

In the "Runaway Bride" episode, of New Dr. Who Season 4, Donna Noble met the doctor for the first time on the eve of her wedding. She later found that her fiancé Lance was involved in an alien plot to destroy the Earth's peoples. Lancer did not survive the encounter nor did the aliens.

Cytherian and Slythene – presumable two alien races that Dr. Who encountered in his travels.

Horta – Just a bit of Star Trek cross over fun (Star Trek – The Original Series – "Devil in the Dark"). Look it up! :)