A/N: song used it 'The Reason' by Hoobstank.
Jack didn't know how long he had been sitting on the edge of his bed before he finally got up and quickly dressed before almost breaking into a quick sprint grabbing his keys and making his way to his truck. 'What am I doing' he said to himself as he started teh truck and pulled out of the driveway. There were so many thoughts running through his head to comprehend, all he knew was that he couldn't leave things the way they were.
Within minutes he was pulling into Sam's driveway only to realize that she wasn't home. 'I wonder where she could be' said Jack as he got out of the truck and headed towards the front door. Knocking a few times just in case, Jack sighed when he realized that she defiantly wasn't home and he didn't have the first clue where to look for her. So instead he choose to wait, and would wait for as long as it took.
Sam hadn't realized she'd been out driving out for almost two hours since leaving Jack's before she finally made her way home. When she pulled into here driveway she saw the familiar Ford truck parked in her driveway, and with it the familiar figure that was now sitting on her front steps. Taking a deep breath Sam finally emerged from her car and slowly walked towards the door.
"What are you doing here?" asked Sam as she approached the sitting figure outside her house.
"I needed to talk to you so I came straight here but you weren't home, so I waited." answered Jack as he rose to his feet and slowly made his way towards her.
I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
"You've been sitting here for almost two hours? My neighbours probably thought you were some stalker and could've called the cops" she said.
"Oh they did. After I an hour and I was still here squad car pulled up. I informed them that I was your CO and was concerned when you didn't answer your phone" answered Jack with a slight smile.
"Oh" was all Sam could say. "So again I ask what are you doing here?"
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
"It took me about a minute after you left that that I realized…I didn't want to lose you. Sam, until I met you my biggest fear in life has been someone breaking through walls I put up after Charlie died and I didn't think anyone could break through" he said lowering his head.
"But I did"
I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear
Taking a deep breath, Jack lifted his head and looked into Sam's eyes, "Yes you did. The moment you walked into that room I could feel them starting to crumble. And over time it only got worse. And last night was the breaking point. Holding you in my arms is something that I had only dreamt about, and waking up to you still being there had an effect on me that no one has ever had…not even Sarah."
"Jack" Sam started
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You
and the reason is You [x3]
"No please let me finish. This morning the last thing I wanted to do was hurt you and I know I did. I told you I didn't want you to risk your career just to see if we…this thing between us could actually work. But at the same time, we've been doing 'this' for almost eight years. Each and every day we put our lives in danger and the thought of losing you is always a fear I have. And if one day we come to that road, that fear… we'll deal with it.
"So what are you saying?" asks Sam
I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
Jack moved closer to Sam, taking her hands in his he looked deep into her eyes, "Sam I'm scared. I'm scared that I'm only capable of being happy in my dreams. You make me happy more than anything and I'm scared that if I let you in…fully let in that I'll screw it up. You said that one day I'd realize what I threw away, Sam today is that day. I'm tired of being scared. I know how much I love you, but the question is do you know how much?" finished Jack as he lifted his hands to the sides of Sam's face.
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
"Show me" whispered Sam
"Slowly Jack smiled and lowered his lips towards Sam's. "You sure?" he asked as the distance between them began to close.
"More than anything in the world" she answered as their lips finally met.
I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you
A/N: For those of you worried, I would never have Sam commit suicide! It's S/J forever! Thanks again for R/R this will continue I am sure.