To Freak Out A Viking Warrior

I'm back! Y'all are lucky that you're getting this early. I'm only doing it 'cause I have to do stuff tomorrow. So, on with the chapter. Today, I freak out everyone's favorite Viking warrior, Astrid! Yay!

Disclaimer: If I owned HTTYD, I'd be busy making the sequel and tv show already. COME ON PEOPLE, WE'RE WAITING!

Mary ran down the street, taking in everything. She watched Viking woman spin clothes and hang laundry. She craned over Viking men as the sparred and chopped wood. All the time, she scribbled in a small notebook with a long yellow piece of wood. She was absolutely everywhere, asking questions and just generally annoying the population of Berk. She was like another Hiccup!

Mary was about halfway down the village, making her way up to Hiccup's place, when she ran into Astrid. At the moment, she had her nose buried in the notebook and she didn't see who it was that she had bumped.

"Oh, so sorry." She said, looking up. That's when she saw the ferocious blonde glaring down at her. "Oh- Oh my. So sorry Astrid. I- I didn't mean to, I just-"

"Whoa, wait a minute. You know me?" Astrid interrupted incredulously.

"Of course!" Mary told her in slight surprise. "You're Astrid Hofferson, although, I heard someone say that it was Hofferdottir, since you're a girl, and that's supposed to be the correct naming... But what do they know?" Mary said dismissively. "Anyway, hi. I'm Mary Penelope, and you guys have to be just about the coolest dudes I've ever heard of. I mean, taking down that huge dragon? Hiccup did quite a bit of work, but he couldn't have done it without you five."

"Well, thank you..." Astrid glanced at the Nadder next to her. Mary followed her gaze and gave a gasp of delight when she saw what was there. "OMG! It's your Nadder! Sweet! Aw, it's so cute! Can I pet it?"

"Um, sure... But be careful, it might bite. And that hurts."

"Trust me, I know." Mary told her. She then looked down and held out a hand towards the dragon. It looked at Astrid for a moment before deciding that Mary was safe and placing her head on the hand. Mary gasped when she felt the scales underneath her skin. "So this is what a dragon feels like..." She murmured . She figured it would be either cold or hot. Cold because they resembled reptiles, which meant that they, too, were probably cold-blooded. On the other hand, they had fire inside them, which would warm them up quite a bit. But instead, it felt a bit like touching a snake. Not really one or the other, but sorta both.

"You're the first dragon I've ever touched." She told the Nadder, scratching it behind the ears.

"Really?" Astrid asked her. "I thought everyone had dragons now."

"Oh no." Mary replied, stroking the Nadder throughly. "We don't have dragons in the-" She stopped herself just in time. She had almost let it slip where she had came from.

"In the what?" Astrid asked her, suspicious.

" N- nothing. Hey, will you answer some questions for me?" Mary quickly changed the subject, eagarly holding up her piece of wood and her notepad.

"Only if you answer mine first." Astrid told her. "Who are you?"

"I told you, I'm Mary Penelope."

"Yeah, whatever, but who's your parents?"

"Well, my mom's name is Rebecca, but everyone calls her Becky, and my dad's name's Timothy, but everyone calls him Tim."

"Yeah, but what do they do?"

"Just stuff. My mom cleans and my dad fixes things. Kinda like Hiccup."

"What do you know about my boyfriend?" Astrid asked, ready to pummel this girl.

"Just that he's a blacksmith, the first Viking who couldn't kill a dragon, first to ride one, to quote you directly, I believe, a nice guy, scrawny, though, often got picked on. He's the son of Stoick the Vast, Oh Hear His Name and Tremble, Ugh, Ugh, his best firend's a dragon who's named Toothless on account of the Night Fury's retractable teeth, he was an outcast until he showed the tribe what he could do, he's loved you for, like, ever, and that he's adorable, in a non-liking way."

"So, everything?"

"Yeah, pretty much. Oh, and his father disowned him before taking it back, he was top in dragon trainning and had to fight a Monstrous Nightmare, but he tried to tame it instead, he once had to eat part of a fish that Toothless puked up for him, he likes to draw, and he once made a bolas cannon, which shot down Toothless during a raid, he was given a helmet that was made out of his deceased mother's breast plate, he built a mechanisam to help enable Toothless's flight after his tail fin was ripped off, he lost a leg while battling the Green Death, you kissed him after he took you for a ride on Toothless, although only on the cheek. You gave him his first real kiss after he woke up from what I'm assuming was a coma, since he was asleep for so long. You punched him before it, which you seem to do a lot, saying that the punch was for scaring him. One of his little catch phrase things is 'Thank you, for summing that up,' and the other is 'You just gestured to all of me.'"

"Yeah, you do know a lot."

"Yep!" Mary told the older girl proudly. "So, can I ask you my questions now?"

"I guess, although I feel like there's a lot you already know."

"Well," Mary shrugged. "You can't get everything from stories."

"Alright, go ahead."

"Okay, question nummeral uno, what's up with you and Hiccup?" Mary grinned.

"Oh, you know..." Astrid blushed. "We're good."

"Good enough to get married good, or I'm-embaressed-so-let's-move-on good?

"The latter." Astrid told her quickly.

"So, what would you do if Hiccup asked you to marry him?" Mary giggled at Astrid's embaressed expression.

"I would say yes, of course, but it's so soon..." She told the younger girl.

"Fair enough." Mary nodded. "Okay, so if you had a daughter, what would you name her?"
"Well, I kinda like the name Stromblade..." Astrid mused.

"What do you think of thye name Rosa?" Mary interrupted, eyes shining.

"Rosa? It's okay. Not really Vikingish. Probably wouldn't scare off the trolls, but okay, nonetheless."

"Well, you gotta admit." Mary told her. "You're entering a new age of Viking. Ugly-like names like Dogsbreath and Snotlout aren't exactly tradition if you ask me. Especially with Hiccup around."

"Yeah, I guess."

"So, what would you name a son, if you had one?"

"What about... Heron?" Astrid asked the girl, wondering what the heck was going on.

"Yeah! Great name! Now, do the Bog- Burglers and Meatheads really exist?"

"Of course!" Astrid looked at the girl. Any Viking would know this stuff, or at least, most of it... "You're not a Viking, are you?"

"No." Mary admitted freely. "I'm a tourist and a writer. That means that I'm visiting Berk as a vacation spot, and I like to make up stories."

"Okay, where you from?" Astrid challenged the girl.

"I- uh, um. Come from... I need to go! Bye!" And she ran away as fast as she could.

"Well," Astrid turned to Blue just slightly triumphantly. "That was wierd."

And, we're done! Have a nice night everyone, and beware of needles!

Next week we terrorize Fishlegs! Anyone with ideas should review! Anyone who sees mistakes should review! Anyone who read this should review! REVIEW! REVIEW!REVIEW!

Penelope, over and out!