G is for God
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters.
God (n): a person or thing of supreme value; a being or object believed to have more than natural attributes and powers and to require human worship.
It was wrong; a sin, actually, but he couldn't find the strength within him to care, to want to repent or even ask for forgiveness. She had become a god to him. The idea of even categorizing her as a false idol seemed preposterous to him because it would entail that there was some sort of flaw within her. At times he had to calm himself down, remind himself that she was only human and had the same faults and lows just like him and everyone else. Whatever it was he certainly couldn't see it.
When he first saw her was in his noon art class where they did still life sketches and paintings. She was a model – nude model. She wasn't the first woman he had sketched nude but there was just something about her; maybe it was the subtle curves of her body that showed a woman that worked out, the full and perkiness of her breasts that seemed to delude one into believing that she was still a young girl. The swell of her hips, the dip between bottom and small of her back, her blemish-free perfect buttocks and that was just everything from her neck down. Her eyes are what really captivated him; the warm light brown pools that he felt the need to capture and make the center of his sketching.
His assignment was supposed to be the whole body but he had spent the first seven minutes staring at the beauty before him, the goddess with awe and wonder until Embry chucked an eraser at him. From there he spent majority of the class trying to get the right look of her eyes onto paper. He struggled because there were a flash of emotions in them that he couldn't pinpoint and felt a pang of jealousy when some guy made a comment that made her chuckle. He wanted to be the one to influence the look in her eyes, wanted to be the one to bring about the right emotion that he was looking for.
She only came back a few more times after that first day to inspire, excite, and seduce him. The jealousy never quelled as the other students, majority male, would talk to her after class or even flirt with her during. He, however, didn't have that kind of 'gumption' as his Dad would normally put it or 'balls' as Quil would say. They'd occasionally make eye contact and just as a mortal should react when confronted with the face of a god he looked away and silently revered her.
A few weeks later he saw her walking across the quad with her ears plugged listening to her phone. He froze and thought her to be absolute perfection in the way she walked; her hips swaying, hair blowing in the wind and the few dark strands resting across her face made him think of a wood sprite. It could be also because of the mythology courses that he was taking but she looked so natural, beautiful, wild and free. She had not covered her face and lips in a large amount of make-up, if at all. And his heart soared when he saw her sit down across from him that he immediately pulled out his sketchpad and began working feverishly fearing that she'd be gone like the wind.
A 'C' is what he had gotten on his assignment when she was his model because all he had to show for his efforts was page after page after page of the model's eyes. Somehow having her before him, out in her element, he could sketch his goddess and received an 'A' as part of his make-up for the assignment.
He sketched her every chance he got regardless of the weather outside. Rainy days depressed him because her face was always hidden underneath the umbrella and because of his height he was unable to see the contentment, laziness, blasé or whatever kind of emotions the rain brought out in her.
Some days he ached to watch her, his pants feeling uncomfortably tight. He debated just sucking it up and talking to her, introducing himself and asking her out. He lusted after her and often wondered what would happen if he touched her. Would he melt? No, of course not but the idea of melting into her, covering her small, lithe body with his, his essence, heart, soul and love was so powerful. Sadly, by the time he sloshed his way out of those thoughts, having found the courage she'd already gotten up and moved on leaving him feeling inadequate and impotent.
"Beautiful sketching." It is the comment from a warm feminine voice that breaks him out of his thoughts. Looking up he freezes upon seeing her; his muse, inspiration, lust – his goddess. She has somehow snuck up behind him and seen what he has been drawing. He thanks God that he wasn't sketching her naked body, this time, but a meadow, a special place back at home in Washington.
"Uh…th – thank you." He stutters out and quickly turns back around trying to hide his blush.
"You were in the art class – I modeled for, right?" She asks and he feels his ears begin to burn as he gives out a quick nod. "And you're also in my Mythology course with Prof. Grimes too?" Upon hearing her mention a possible course that they've shared together and he not know about it, he whips around to face her.
The giant moth in his stomach begins to flutter as she chuckles at his surprised reaction. Her eyes seem to sparkle with a happiness that he's not been privy to see before now.
"I sit in the back of the class." She explains answering his unasked question of 'how come I've not seen you'. "I notice you always sitting out here, busy sketching and I was just curious what you draw. I'm Leah, by the way." Leah says introducing herself and offering her hand out to him.
"Jacob," He answers back and prays that his hand isn't sweaty as he takes hers. Her hand is small, warm and soft in his and their grasp lingers longer than what is considered casually normal for such an introduction.
Leah becomes a regular in his life and Jacob isn't sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing having his goddess with him, no longer having to watch her from afar. She sits next to him in Mythology now. They have lunch on the quad, hang out together and eventually she models for him – and him alone. He loves the intimacy of it, being able to gently touch her chin and direct her head just so in the light. Both knowing that he could ask and she'd do it but he can't deny that he loves the jolt of electricity he feels when he touches her chin and the small smile she gives him.
She's his personal muse, model, inspiration and she is everything that he does.
Their friendship grows into love.
That love into a marriage.
That marriage into a family – a large family.
Lying in bed beside her, his goddess, Jacob still feels an awe and reverence about her. He knows now that she's not perfect, that she has her flaws, faults and setbacks but there is still something supernatural about her strength. He still melts at her touch but long gone is the mortal fear of being too close.
"Want to hear a secret?" Leah asks only succeeding in slowing down Jacob's exploration of her body. "I hadn't originally signed up for that Mythology course." Leah says after Jacob lightly kissed her hip before nodding his head for her to continue.
He looks up a bit surprised at her admission. Her shoulder shakes a little with the chuckle that she is fighting to hold back. And they both sigh as he moves up her body, his groin pressing into her rear, his hand resting on her naked stomach that isn't as flat anymore since the last baby was born almost a year ago.
"I walked in by accident – got my room numbers mixed up. I was supposed to be taking some stupid 16th Century European history course." She continues on explaining and he's confused by this strange confession and drags out an 'okay' that shows his feelings.
"I only added the class after seeing, what could only be, some kind of god walk in." Leah states with a soft and dreamy sigh. Jacob frowns and growls out his anger, jealousy and loathing for this man that convinced Leah to stay while at the same time thanking the bastard for convincing her to stay longer.
"So what happened to this 'god'?" Jacob asks irritable as he leans down and catches Leah's earlobe in between his teeth and bites down. Why he's jealous he's not really sure; it's childish, really, considering how he's married to her now. He doesn't give her chance to answer, rolling her over onto her back and capturing her lips. The kiss is loving, passionate, familiar and exciting all at once.
"I married him." Leah says in between kisses. "Thought now would be a good of time as any to tell you that." Leah says with a giggle as Jacob stares down at her in surprise.
Jacob has never been a very prideful person but hearing Leah admit that she saw him as a god just as much as he saw her – he can't help but feel a few feet taller. Now, he doesn't feel so bad about making the same confession to her.
A/N: Alright so there goes my god. You know working this late shift has just really thrown me off because my body wakes up at 7:32am on the dot – Monday through Friday with no problem but I can't go to bed until about 1:37pm or 2pm depending on whatever I'm doing which is mostly reading. But it's weird because I guess I'm mentally exhausted although physically I'm alert because people ask me a question, I hear it and I respond back…but with what's really on my mind. It's not like I have Tourette Syndrome all of a sudden and cussing people out but I – I think I told someone about a story that I'm writing. Because they looked at me funny, blinked a few times, said 'okay' and walked away. My supervisor then started laughing and said, 'What did Jacob do?'. OH! So imagine how mortified I've been today and then trying vainly and unsuccessfully to lie like the so-called OH-SO-POWERFUL-WIZARD OF OZ! No, no it has nothing to do with the hot, sexy guy that's decorating my work space. However, if anyone wants to give me another picture of Jacob Black to join the others along with my niece and my latest white boyfriend who's only four-months old then by all means I'll take it! But man…I need to get back to my usual shift before I'm found out.
On another strange note…so, some of you may remember the fox that was hanging outside my window at night. So he's gone, hopefully he just found a cute little vixen and has had a litter of pups but now there's these two coyotes. First of all, nobody wants to believe me there's coyotes in our neighborhood DESPITE the fact that we have foxes, white-tailed deer, possums, ground hogs, turkey vultures, just plain turkeys and a bigfoot (not my story but something to be shared at another time). Getting wwaaaayyy off topic but, yea, there are now two coyotes out there. I don't yell at them cuz coyotes are notorious for attacking people – don't believe me? Just play Red Dead Redemption and then tell John Marsten. But…I don't know what to do about them. I'm certain they've already eaten the four missing cat in the subdivision and surround neighborhood. Oh Miss. Crank you shall be missed. *sniffles* Again, another story.
But you all know what to do. Review and make my day. Thanks for all of the reviews if I haven't said it already. I'm serious when I say they make my day brighter.