Title: Edward, Are You Gay?
Genre: Friendship, Romance
Pairing: Edward/Jasper (Em POV)
Word Count: 6,342 (total)
Warnings: No beta, different POV, slight bad language
Chapters: 5
Rated: T
Summary: Emmett's best friend is gay and is crushing hardcore on his brother. The problem is, Emmett doesn't know if his brother is gay or not. And Emmett will do almost anything to find out. AU/AH/EJ/EmPOV
A/N: All five chapters are fairly short and could probably compile into a relatively short one-shot but I decided to post them separately to make the story flow better day-to-day. This was written as a personal challenge to see if I could write an entire romance themed story from an outside perspective. Let me know how you like it. I contemplated labeling this as an E/Em story as Friendship and Humor but decided more people would read it posted like this.
Chapter 3:
Thursday 10am Classroom 6D
The next day Jasper sits next to me in Spanish and asks if I found anything out. He looks so nervous and I can't understand what it is about my brother that makes him that way. He's normally so confident. I hate that I have no answer to give him.
I tell him how I thought about making a list but realized that a bunch of stereotypes wouldn't tell me anything. I leave Esme out of the conversation; no need for him to know I involved her in his love life.
His response shocks me. I sit, watching Jasper laugh his ass off until he looks at me eyes full of mirth and questions, and "That's the best plan you could come up with? Making a list? Didn't you ever think of, oh I don't know, checking his porn stash?"
His porn stash? What was Jasper talking about? "What are you talking about?"
Again he looks at me as if I'm missing something obvious. "Really Em, for being so smart you really can be stupid. Don't you have porn stored away somewhere? Under your mattress or on your computer or something?" He waits for my nod before continuing, "And wouldn't it make sense for Edward to have a hidden stash somewhere too? If you could find it, you would know. If there are girls, he's straight. If it's only guys, well, I get the answer I'm hoping for."
My best friend is a genius. "Jasper, you are a genius," I grin at him. Why didn't I think of that? It was such a simple plan but it had to work. Unless Edward was indeed asexual, he has to have at least a few pictures stored away somewhere. Raising an eyebrow and tilting my imaginary hat, I tell Jasper I'll look for the evidence tonight.
JE+JE+JE+JE+JE+JE+JE+JE+JE+JE+JE
That night I try my hardest to act normal throughout dinner. I must have succeeded because Esme didn't say anything about Jasper or his problems. Once we'd finished our chicken and had been excused, I made my way up to my room.
I worked on my homework while keeping an ear out for Edward's door to open. The second he headed to the shower I tiptoed into his room and shut his door, looking around. I figure I probably have about thirty minutes before Eddy comes back into the room. I'm lucky the fucker takes such long showers.
Looking around his room I decided to start with his laptop, figuring that's where my own collection is gathered - so his probably is too. I open up his finder application and look under the folder "Pictures." I open up his photo library and quickly search for any bare skin. Nothing. Next I click on his "Movies" folder. Nothing there but an old school project on the history of the Civil War.
The part of my brain that isn't focused on finding my brother's porn thinks that maybe Edward and Jasper could be could together. They both really like history.
A light bulb goes off in my brain and I think to type the word "porn" into the search bar. A lot of random word documents show up that have nothing about porn in the title. I scroll down and I see a song from one of his favorite musicals. Scrolling down even farther I hit the jackpot: a folder labeled "porn."
I click on it and a window pops up asking for a password. That fucker. I don't even know how to password protect my files. How do you do that? But that will be a mystery for another day. Right now I need to try and figure out his password. First I try our birth mother's name: Elizabeth. Nada. Next I try the name of our cat: Alice. Nope. Maybe the password is something to do with the file? I try "penis" next and then "boobs" and finally "fucking." I come to the realization that I'm not ever going to figure out his password by just guessing.
I click out of the finder and step away from the computer, once again looking around his room. The next spot I try is under his mattress. No hidden magazines there. Next I try his sock drawer where I find a box of unused condoms but little else. A similar search in his desk drawers comes up with nothing. Before I leave I check his closet but don't find anything but a box of legos and his treasure box full of childhood toys. Sighing I leave his room.
I'm not in my room two minutes before I hear Edward come out of the bathroom. I made it out of there just in time. Too bad I didn't have anything useful to tell Jasper. I fall asleep that night wondering why I even care so much if my brother's gay. I guess I just really want my best friend to be happy. And if Edward makes him happy, then even better.
A/N: Thanks for reviewing! Hope you decide to leave me your thoughts. Anyone guess what song Emmett found on Edward's computer?
-Laura