I haven't really had a chance to review this, well that's a lie. I have at a chance to review it but I haven't, I'm too lazy, so feel free to tell me when you find a mistake because I know there is plenty- I've found a few but still haven't bothered to change them, but any who. It gets a little strange, and the characters are a bit different then they are in the actual book, but I kinda tried to keep Henry, Joss, and Otis the same.

Vladimira also has a different back history then the original Vladimir Tod, which I will explain in the future, I plan to, but I'm a lazy bum, kinda re-write the whole series with my character, I have enough time to do it I'm just not determined enough lol.

I'm sorry to bombard readers with this... should probably try breaking it down some more...? ... Well I have a whole 29,027 word document typed already on this story and this is what, 23 thousand? Hopefully I'll upload the rest soon.

When I awoke again my eyes shot open, I didn't know what had happened, I looked to my left and saw a sleeping Dorian and then everything came rushing back, I remembered just about everything. I looked at the window and it was still dark out, looking over to my clock it read 5:12 AM. I went to sit up, but it wasn't as easy as I thought. Dorian's left arm was still reaching across me, holding on to my hip, while his right had slid under his own head. My legs where still in-between his although I had woke up from sleeping on my back. I looked back over at the clock, there was no use going back to bed, although I wanted to, I would have to get up for school in an hour anyway.

I slid out from under Dorian's hand, rolling off the bed, using gravity to help stand me up, it almost worked against me. As my legs fell and touched the floor I tried to roll my upper body to stand up on them, but my muscles almost didn't react and I started to get a bit to close to the edge and fall off. I stood up, not very fast, but I still received a wave of lightheadedness, I heard Dorian let out a quiet laugh.

I started walking towards the bathroom, dragging my feet, I hated sleeping in skinny jeans because every time I woke up I find that the button had bitten my stomach. Sleeping in my hoodie also felt weird, when I woke up, the bottom scrunchy part that I normally folded under the hoodie became untucked and hung down loosely like a dress around the bottom of my thighs. The sleeves unrolled and slid over my hands, with the neck part of the hoodie pulled in one direction to reveal my shoulder, the hoodie had always been to big but I got it as a gift when I was younger. I yawned, pulling my arm up to my mouth, the sleeve falling down loosely till the middle of my forearm.

I reached the bathroom, I felt like a blob, and when I looked in the mirror I was shot awake. I had red stains all over my chin, neck and shoulder, a hand print on my neck from where Dorian held me to feed me that blood. My hoodie had blood all over the left shoulder, along with my shirt. I quickly threw off my hoodie and over shirts, wearing only my black tank top and bra on top, I ran back down to my room. Dorian was standing by the door of my room, about to walk out when I popped up, I didn't even look at him, I quickly went to my bed, there was blood all over it.

I let out a groan and sat at the foot of my bed, I didn't feel like even getting out of bed let alone having to clean. Dorian was still standing by the door, but watching me now, I looked over to him and let out another groan. He followed my gaze and looked at the wall next to the door, it had two holes in it and blood that slid down to almost the ground. Looking back at me, I had already moved. My back turned to him, I threw my shirts and hoodie into the blankets and bunched them all up, throwing them on the ground, looking at the sheet. My head dropped and I let out another groan, the sheet was covered in blood, and the pillows, and no doubt the mattress.

Dorian let out a soft chuckle, and I gave him an evil glare, but that didn't stop him. "You're messy!" I said, throwing a pillow around my arm at him, hitting him in the stomach. He let out another laugh and dropped the pillow on the pile of blankets, I pushed all the other pillows off too, not looking back at him, I pulled the sheet off and Yupp! There was blood all over the mattress. I let out another groan and he laughed again, "That wasn't me," He said simply, I could hear his smile in his voice, "You kept closing your mouth." He shrugged and I threw the sheet at him, it unraveled and covered his head and shoulders. "Well..." I started, I didn't really know what to do with the mattress, "Not my fault... I didn't want it." I went back to the bathroom and brought back a wet rag.

I sat butterfly style in the middle of the bed, attempting to scrub off the blood, but it only went away a little, it was stained. I let out another groan and dropped my head, "It's just a little blood." He was defending himself, so I threw the rag at him, he caught it again and dropped it on the pile, I stood up with my back to him, flipping the bed over, and it was still clean on the other side. "Yeah, it's just a little... only a pool of blood." My sarcasm made him laugh, but that didn't really help me any, I grabbed the rag from the pile and took it to the wall, scrubbing it while he stood there.

I was sitting on the floor now, scrubbing the wall, I brought my dry hand and rubbed the back of my neck, my fingers sliding over the deep scars that spread down to the middle of my back, I thought about them for a moment but quickly pushed them out of my head and stood up, the wall was clean but there was no way I could scrub out the holes. Dorian had been reading my mind, I already knew that, and I was hoping he would stay quiet about it. The scars where visible in a normal shirt so I always wore a thin Nikes turtle neck under my shirt and over my undershirt. With just an undershirt on you could see the scars on the back of my neck as they spread out across to the edges of my shoulders, down my back but you couldn't see that.

I figured that since he had already searched my mind there was nothing to hide, but that doesn't mean it was comfortable to have my back to him, I threw the rag on the pile and picked it up. Walking out the door as he moved aside, no longer about to leave, but instead watching me. I took them and shoved them into the washer, hoping that would get out the blood, if not spread the stain equally around so it looked normal. Only three people that I knew, knew about the scars, Otis, Vikas, and Dorian. They were a small reminder that I didn't move straight in with Nelly when they died, but went into foster care... they all were religious families and they all could tell I was a vampire and tried to get the demon out of me with brutal acts.

I walked back to the bathroom and looked in the mirror, it was too late to get in the shower but I still had blood stains all over my skin. Grabbing another rag I started to scrub my chin and neck, Dorian leaned on the doorjamb. We were both silent, I was busy scrubbing and he was busy staring, not very efficiently though. I didn't know what to say to him... If I should thank him for saving me or be mad at him that I needed to be saved in the first place, he shifted his weight, he was listening to my thoughts. I looked over to him, waiting to see his reaction, the rag still inches from my face, he didn't look at me though, he avoided my gaze.

"That wasn't very nice..." I finally said, speaking of several things at once, the stealing my blood and forcing me to drink blood myself and for getting it all over the place. He didn't acknowledge that I had said anything, probably trying to figure out for himself which part I was talking about. I decided to continue and chose one of the things to yell at him about since he was still here. "The whole... making me drink blood part." I could understand the need to drink blood, at least a little bit, so I pushed it off, as for the mess, I already called him messy. He had a questioning look in his eyes, I looked at him briefly then returned my gaze to the mirror and started scrubbing my neck, I had noticed that I had huge dark bruises on my neck and on my wrists, he probably broke the bone with how hard he was squeezing. "I had too." He didn't sound guilty, but he also didn't sound like that he fully believed it, "Yeah? Well... I didn't want it." I didn't look at him to see his reaction.

"You needed it..." his voice was quiet, and sounded very upset, I froze and looked over at him, most the blood was gone from my face, I already knew that, "I still didn't want it." Continuing to rub my neck and shoulder he turned, leaning against the wall, hiding from my vision. "I knew... I could hear your thoughts remember?" I washed out the rag, the sink filled with a rusty color, "How could I forget?" I walked out of the bathroom and to my room, taking a blanket and covering the bed, I didn't want Nelly to see an empty bed and think something happened, at least this way she would assume that there were still sheets under it.

I reached into my closet, pulling out two shirts, not bothering to change my clothes, Dorian followed me and was standing in the door. I followed his gaze to my wrists and neck, I looked around the room and found as many bracelets as I could, 3 bandana's and some sweatbands, throwing them on the bed so I could put them on. It would hurt, anything touching the bruised area hurt, let alone constricting it with a sweatband and bracelets, I folded the bandana's making wide cuffs out of them and put them on the thicker part of my wrist, using a teal checkered one to hide the bruise on my neck, it already was hurting. I licked my lips to realize that they were bruised to and felt like I had been biting them that work was all Dorian. I had all of the bruises completely covered and then reached in and pulled out a hoodie, all my hoodies were too big and my wrists always showed, other then the few bracelets I always kept on my wrist. I looked over and picked up the empty blood bag, with several small holes in it, "Why didn't you just try to put the bag in my mouth and see if maybe I would drink it?" I walked down to the kitchen to throw it away, Dorian followed, "I did..." He started, remaining on the stairs now, "You were dead... You wouldn't drink it after you were breathing either."

I went to the kitchen, normally I ate before going to school for the simple fact that I didn't want to be caught hungry in school, but looking at the blood bag it made me nausea. I looked up at him, "You want one?" I held it out, not looking at it, his head shook, course not you already got your fill I said in my head, throwing it back into the freezer and closing it. I walked pass him and back up to my room, he slowly followed.

I was laying face down on the bed, I had no desire to be up this early, I moved my head to the side, looking out the window at the now visible trees. I sighed and sat up again, Dorian still standing in the doorway, I sat butterfly style again in the center of the bed, one arm flopped down in front of me and the other up and rubbing my eyes. "Did your 'calling' care that it was a school night?" I asked letting out a yawn, "Especially the 'first day of school' school night?" He didn't answer, he could probably tell that I was only kidding but that I also was a bitch when I didn't get much sleep, I slid off the bed, away from him, my legs folded up against my chest and my arms laying against the ground palm up.

"I'm sorry." His silence made me feel bad, I stretched my left hand further left to grab my empty backpack, I didn't mean to sound like such a nagging bitch. I went to reach for my notebooks that were to my right, at the end of the bed, but I had to move to get them. I reached barely, my arm was a few inches to short so I dropped my arm to the floor and my head into my knees, closing my eyes again. Something touched my hand, I turned my head slightly to my right, peeking my eye open, Dorian nudged the books towards me, I let out a weak laugh.

I grabbed the notebooks and dragged them, shoving them into my backpack and zipping it shut on them, looking up to Dorian, he had a sad frown on his face. My own small smile slipped and I kept my eyes on his, "What's wrong?" He seemed like he was upset about something, but I couldn't tell what, was it what I had said? He wasn't looking at me although his head was tipped down, he was looking at the floor. I moved my head down and over, trying to make eye contact with him, and once I did it looked as if he jumped. "Hello?" I sat back up, holding his gaze, "What's wrong?" I repeated my question, it seemed as if something was eating away at him.

Standing up, I walked in front of him, looking into his eyes, but he wasn't looking into mine but staring at where my eyes were. I slowly waved my hand in front of his face, he didn't react, I placed my hand on his shoulder and he literally jumped and his eyes shot at me, I quickly pulled my hand away, at first he looked as though he was going to bite it off but when his eyes met mine they grew very sad and caring, I repeated my question again. He didn't answer, I continued to stare at him, concern was probably very noticeable on my face.

He gave a small laugh, "With me?" He finally answered, I looked around, "Well... Yeah...?" His smirk disappeared and was replaced with seriousness. "Vikas taught you how to control minds I trust?" I looked up at him, not knowing what he was talking about but getting some what tired of it, I sat down on the bed, still looking up at him. "Ummm... Yeah, he did... Why?" I didn't know where he was going with this, "Have you used it to get revenge yet?" I almost flinched, I didn't know where he was going still, but I knew that I would be nowhere good, "I have no reason to get revenge." I said simply, and I didn't, I wasn't a strong person on the concept of revenge, though I was while in the moment.

"You have every reason for revenge." He stepped closer, his eyes wide with eagerness, I still didn't know what he was talking about, "And who is this person that deserves to feel my vengeance hmmm?" I leaned forward on the bed, I couldn't bring anyone to mind, but I didn't have to. He brought them to my mind for me, drawing up 4 faces from my past that I had all but managed to forget. The hair on the back of my neck stood up, I acted as if I didn't see what he did, "So?" My voice was portraying me, shaking, "What do you think I should do, make 'em trip down a flight of stairs and get a few pumps and bruises? That's not going to do anything." I forced myself to look up at him again, my brow creased.

He stared at me like I was ignoring the main object, "You should kill them!" I jumped, breaking eye contact with him, "No!" I yelled back, my head tipped down, there was no way that I was going to kill someone, not again. I spoke again, in a softer voice, "They all lost their rights to have foster children... They can't do any of that anymore to anyone." My hair fell down in front of my eyes, I hated talking about them, the one time I had before- with both Otis and Vikas I literally got in a fight with Vikas and I couldn't stop shaking the entire time I talked.

Silence filled the room, he stepped closer again, "They deserve it!" I knew he was reading my mind and I didn't much care, in the full time I had known him, which was less then 24 hours, he sounded like an immature child for the first time. I sat there silently, Vikas thought the same thing though... Otis wanted to find and kill them himself although he wouldn't admit it. Everyone that had ever known about it, all they wanted was me to do something, but there was nothing that needed to be done. Dorian looked at me, he knew he was being immature, "Why you snooping around my mind Dorian?" I asked, trying to change the subject but he knew I was and just ignored my question.

"Someone should get revenge on them." I let out a deep sigh, "There is no need for revenge! Why is everyone so worried about revenge? Why can't it just be that I'm okay now and that's all that matters?" I looked up at him, my lip was trembling and water was building up in my eyes. When my parents died I was put in foster care right away, because of Nelly being a nurse they wanted to try and find a more home legal guardian.

I was whipped in my first home, branded, burned, and drowned in my second, burned again in my third and locked away in my fourth home, all of which I never wanted to return to. Nelly came and got me, when she asked I lied to her, saying it was cool, I lived with this astronomer guy and his wife who loved horses. She believed me and never asked anything after that, while in Siberia though I had had a dream about them and strangely enough I was some how putting all my emotions, fear, sadness, pain, guilt, on everyone in the cabin. Otis and Vikas ran into my room to find me asleep, Vikas tried to force me to tell them, that's how we got in the fight, they both promised to never say anything about it ever again, and that was the end of that.

I slid onto the floor, hiding my face behind my knees, Dorian looked at me and I replied with a simple semi-true statement, "I'm fine." He went to try and say something, but when I looked up at him he stopped, closing his mouth again. "Why don't you get revenge?" I asked him, trying to focus the conversation on him instead, he gave me a questioning glance, "It's obvious that something constantly bothers you..." I didn't want him to hurt someone, but at least he could talk about it. "That's different." He said simply, regaining his composer, "How so?" I looked back up at him. "It was my fate." He wasn't looking at me, but he wasn't avoiding me either.

Knocking from the door echoed upstairs, and then it opened, "Hey! You ready?" Henry's voice followed the echo, "Yeah, I'll be down in a second." I looked back up at Dorian then straight ahead, taking a deep breath to clear my mind. I went to stand up, but didn't get very far, my body was still refusing my movements, I tried again. A hand reached out in front of me, Dorian looked down at me, all angry and upset emotions seemed to be gone from him for now. I reached up, grabbing his hand, he gently pulled me up, but as I went to stand on my own I fell back down on my bed. I let out a groan again, laying on my bed, "I hate school..." I tried to sit back up but to no avail, I heard Henry downstairs, picking around in the fridge.

Before I knew what had happened Dorian had picked me up, and some how got me and my backpack downstairs using his vampiric speed. Placing me down in the kitchen, Henry looked at us with a not very surprised food filled face, he mumbled something but I didn't hear it. "What?" I asked, embarrassed that Dorian just did that, Henry forced the food down his throat, "I said, Who's your boyfriend." He was already getting more food, I smiled, sitting down in a chair, waiting for him do start eating the science project he was creating.

"The ghost boy in the corners friend, why you want one?" I laughed, leaning my head on my hand and may arm on the table watching him start to devour it. "Oh, I see... and no, thought the ghost boy couldn't have any more friends over after the last one killed pwinkel when she escaped from the crazy cat lady under the beds grasps?" He continued eyeing his food, "She has long since forgot that, she had a Imperial Zimbabwe heir over last week and since then has been arguing with the Chink in the chair because he keeps trying to eat the heirs Elephant." I loved talking to Henry, especially in this type of a normal way, I laughed to myself.

"Maybe the cat lady should have her cats attack?" He was zoned into his food that now looked like it was moving, "Sadly she tried, but the Cuban under the books got a bunch of lizards shipped in on Monday and since then his lizards have been killing her cats." Henry took a full bit of his creature, and I debated whether or not I should get something to eat myself. "Hmm... And the Arabian in the window? He'll do anything for something shiny." "Sadly the succubus Nigerian under the table got a leash around his neck and he's terrified to disobey her." I sat up some, this was an interesting conversation. "What about teal girl? she was zombfied last time I checked." He took another bite, "She has changed an awful lot. She got addicted to Meth and since then has been chatting away with hyena boy under the computer. But I believe Birdie will be back this afternoon and return to his collection in my closet, maybe he could set things right?" Henry nodded and in a few more gulps his creation had died. He set his unused plate and silverware in the sink and went to the freezer, reaching in and grabbing a blood bag.

"Don't much care if you're hungry or not, but it's the first day back and it'll be easier to last six and a half hours when you've already eaten." He waited for me to grab the blood bag, I let out a groan instead, feeling my stomach becoming uncomfortable with even looking at it. "Do you think its possible to become un-vampire?" I asked joking, not wanting to drink it. The recently silent Dorian appeared in conversation again, "You have to drink blood again sometime... And the sooner you do, the sooner the memories erase." and just like that, he placed his hand on my shoulder, kissed me on the cheek and left.

"Well? That wasn't what I expected, but sure, lets go with what he said, and add in the whole kiss thing too." Henry laughed as my face flushed, "how old is he exactly?" I thought for a second, "umm... in his twenties," It wasn't exactly a lie, "Even by those standers that makes him a cradle robber." Henry laughed again, sitting down, waiting for me to start drinking the blood bag again. "Well... bottoms up." I crinkled my nose and put the blood bag in my mouth. At first I felt as though I was going to vom, but after a few seconds it tasted like the blood I remembered and my body didn't feel weird this time.

"See." Came a voice in my head, Dorian was still dropping in on my head, I looked up at Henry and felt better that I had done it now rather then waited and got halfway through the day and decided to drink.

The day had gone by relatively smooth, I had almost no classes with Henry though, but the next class was with Otis and then only a short while longer till I could go home and sleep. As I walked into the new mythology room, the thought of Nelly's face if she goes to touch the laundry and it didn't wash out like it could have… I let out another groan. "Surely the day cannot be that bad?" Otis smiled walking in behind me, there were only a few other students already in the room. "I love you and all Otis, but I might fall asleep in your class today." I rested my head back, peering over my shoulder to look at Otis, a smile still on his face, he brought his hand up and placed it on my neck.

I jumped, the whole day I had my hood up and the bandana around my neck, but Otis pulled off my hood and I didn't know how much of the bruising he could see, I all but froze waiting for him to say something. My turtle neck shirt covered most of my neck, but not where the bruises where the darkest, they managed to slide up and show above the shirt. "Don't be shocked to find yourself in the office then," He smiled, I let out a quiet sigh, "Good, he didn't see it," I thought walking slowly back to my seat in the back of the room.

"Vladimira, a word after school," I let out another groan and let my head drop down onto the desk… This day was so staggeringly long and tiring and it seemed to only be getting worse, I don't care if he sent me to the office, I was tired and I was already going to hear it from him later. I fell asleep, my arms still under the desk, I didn't want him to pull them up and find the bruises on them too, something kept poking me in the back and it woke me from my deep sleep.

I had been sleeping for about 20 minutes, Otis was still talking about his rules in his class room and I wondered if I missed the 'Otis Otis' part. The poking continued, I slowly picked my head, turning around to find Joss there, stabbing me in the back with his pencil. I let out another groan… Joss was in my class, not someone that I really wanted to be around at the moment, I turned back around, setting my head back down on the desk till I felt another jab in my back. "Will you knock it off?" I whispered back at him, turning my whole body, he shrugged and sat back.

Again my head returned to the warm spot on the desk, but when I felt another jab it was deeper the rest and it actually hurt, piercing the pencil through my hoodie and shirts and skin, right on my spine. I turned around ripped the pencil from his hand and snapped it in half, setting it back down on his desk and going back to sleep. But again, I felt jabs, except this time I felt two, I sat still for a moment, hoping that he would just stop already but no, that's not Joss's style. He continued to poke me, probably wishing it was a stake and we weren't in 8th period, I turned around and stole the pencil pieces, putting them in my pocket.

Otis called on Joss, who probably rose his hand but my head had already returned to its warm spot before I saw him do so, "Yes Joss?" Otis sounded as if he knew what was happening and was already tired of it, "Vladimira stole my pencil." Joss's voice sounded like a small child's, complaining, but my voice didn't sound much better, "No I didn't, I'm sleeping." I added, Otis probably already realized that I did, and that I was also sleeping in his class but he wasn't as amused but was as annoyed as I was. I looked up, he pressed his fingers against his forehead as if he had a migraine. "Vladimira..." His tone was impatient but reasonable, :"You would do best not to sleep in my class, and return Joss's pencil." The rest of the class looked at me, so I turned back around and set the pencil pieces on his desk and leaned my head against my hand, trying to at least look like I was awake.

"She broke my pencil," Joss added, reaching into his backpack to pull out a pen, I didn't need to defend myself but I did anyway, "He wouldn't stop poking me with it." I gave out a yawn and Otis shook his head, not very happy, "If you two are going to behave this way for the rest of the year, I shall be writing a few too many office passes." He turned around and sat behind his desk, writing with his no doubt still atrocious hand writing, standing back up holding two slips of paper. Joss walked up first, not that I wasn't fond of the office, but the simple fact that it required me to move made me disapprove, slowly I left my seat and grabbed the note, my sleeve pulled up and a hint of a bruise was visible on my hand. Otis gave me another look but I didn't much care, "After school!"

I slid in the office chair, my bum barely even on the seat, waiting for the principal to call me in after Joss, but if he didn't hurry up I was going to fall asleep on him. You would think that a caring uncle would be worried with you if you came to school with bruises and a much paler complexion then usual but apparently not, that or maybe Otis didn't really care like he said. I squeezed my eyes shut, pushing away the thoughts, I didn't want to think that way, if his emotions were real or fake didn't much matter to me, as long as he didn't leave or tell me the truth. Finally I was called in and after about an hour I walked home, ignoring Otis's echoing in my head to see him after school, he was going to go to my house after anyway, why not save him some time.

I didn't even wait for Henry, which made me feel kinda bad but he planned on hanging out somewhere with October so I guess it wasn't that bad. Once I made it home I shut the front door, not listening to see if it closed or not and crashed on the couch, dropping on it without taking off my shoes or my backpack. My hand fell and laid on the ground as I stared for as long as I could stay awake, which wasn't very long, once I left school I had rolled up my sleeves and didn't bother putting my hood up for the simple fact that there was no one to look and see and it was too hot not to. I tried to listen to see if Nelly was home, hearing someone's feet on the floor behind the couch, figuring it was just her but not bothering to see, if it was her I didn't want her to no I was awake so she could nag at me, I was out.

I didn't bother to open my eyes, I was comfy and I wanted to stay that way for as long as possible, but the floor felt different. I fell on the couch on my stomach with my arm dangling off, the same way I was now but this wasn't the living room floor, I slowly opened my eyes, looking straight ahead to see two holes in the wall and with both another groan and a sigh of relief I sat up. My bag was over in the corner but my shoes were nowhere to be seen, looking over at my clock I let out another yawn. I was still tired, though I just had an extra deep sleep for two and a half hours, though with how far gone I was it should have counted for at least 4 hours.

Slowly I slid my feet on the floor, not bothering to lift them, I stood at the first step, hearing someone in the kitchen and hoping it wasn't Otis, but knowing it probably was. I stayed at the last step again, peering around the corner to see who it was, I saw a newspaper being held up, covering their body, but they stared to lower it and I saw blonde. Quickly standing straight up to hide behind the wall, it was Otis and he was waiting, hopefully for Nelly and not me, I turned around hoping that I could make it back upstairs and in my bed before he realized I was up, but his words didn't agree. "Too late," he took a sip of his blood, "I saw you."

Still dragging my feet I walked around the corner, his newspaper now laid on the table but he was still staring at it intently, I sat across from him, laying my covered arms on the table and my head on my upper arm, still on the verge of sleeping, but being careful not to put too much pressure on any of the bruises. We sat in silence for a few moments, I had no desire to be the one who started talking, not when I didn't know if he was mad, upset, or annoyed with me, one of his irritating yet valuable characteristics- not showing what he's thinking.

But the silence was also becoming irritating, "So..." I played with the smudge marks on the table, bored and not knowing what else to do, maybe he had forgot that he wanted to see me. "Where's Nelly?" I moved my eyes to look up at him, but quickly looked back down at the table, he seemed to be giving me the silent treatment, or reading a very interesting article- which was unlikely. He lifted his mug up to his mouth, speaking over the brim, "She left messages." He said simply, still looking at the newspaper and not me, clearly not wanting to talk to me, I stood up walking over to the phone, the operator number was flashing the number 4, I pressed the button. The first one was short, saying that she got called in and she was sorry she missed me this morning and that she wondered how the day went, the second wondering where I was and to call her when I got the message. The third one was from about an hour after, she was angry, she called saying that she called Otis and that I blew him off after school and that she didn't like hearing about me sleeping in class, and the fourth one saying that Otis was coming and that when she got home I would be in trouble, she must have been having a good day at work because she managed to joke that if I ran from her too that I would be grounded longer.

Letting out a yawn I walked back over to the table sitting down in my now cold seat, I would rather face them at the same time then at separate because they always contradicted each other so I always ended up in less trouble. I laid my head back down on my arm and laid my arms on the table continuing to play and make new smudge marks, waiting for Otis to say something. But again he didn't. After about 10 minutes I continued where I left off, "So...?" but he still didn't look up at me instead raising his mug to his mouth again. Although the blood tasted okay earlier, right now it just seemed nasty and I felt sick again, hiding it pretty well. "I don't appreciate students sleeping in my class." his voice was soft but stern, he had every right to be mad at me, I was completely rude to him in school and even after school.

Still not looking at me he took another drink and the smell reached me making me sick again, I didn't plan on opening my mouth while he was still drinking it, but he wouldn't agree with me, finally looking at me only to give me a glare. "I'm sorry." I didn't look up at him because I could still feel his eyes on me, I moved my head into my sleeve to let out another yawn, I needed more sleep. He was still silent, but his glare soften some, "I wasn't trying too." I added, hoping that he would look back at his newspaper now, but he didn't, just watched my finger as I slid it on the table silently. "Well..." He started, finally going to make this a conversation, "I know most students would try and take advantage of their family being a teacher." He didn't sound like he fully believed his own words but like he was trying to avoid something else, "Yeah," I laughed weakly, "So they can continue to deal with it when they leave school?" My eyes found a half smile on his lips, he wasn't really mad at me, just trying to sound it.

He looked back down at the newspaper but not reading it, instead folding it up and setting it aside neatly, which meant he wanted to talk about something more serious. I would take talking about sleeping in class right now if I could avoid the conversation I was hoping wasn't coming next, but Hope wasn't much on my side today it seemed. "Take off the bandanas." His voice was delicate though he was commanding me to do something, I let out a groan while letting my head sink to the table and my arms fold behind my neck to untie it, letting it drop to the table, but I still let my head rest. "All of them." He added and it made me let out another groan, without looking up I untied the bandanas on my wrists, letting them fall and unravel to the table, still not looking up.

Not really wanting to the look on his face I raised my head, setting my chin on the table and looking at him, my arms folded softly in front of my lower half of my face, he wasn't in a very good mood at all but he seemed like he was trying. I only had on about 5 candy bracelets left on each wrist, opaque with vibrant colors of the rainbow from clear to dark purple, he held out his hand, resting his elbow on the table, "Hand." Slowly I obliged and slowly reached my hand away from myself, not putting my hand in his own but letting him grab it, I didn't like people touching my hands, it always felt weird. Pulling off the remaining bracelets he stared at me while I looked down at the table, he held my fingers and thumb, looking at the giant some what square bruise on my wrist that was about 4 maybe 5 inches long, a light maroon and yellow color.

"What happened?" That's all he really wanted to know, his voice was caring and yet still stern, but he didn't seem mad like I thought he was in class, I didn't look up at him, "Nothing." My voice was quiet because I knew he wouldn't like that answer but that was the only one that he was going to get out of me, he held out his other hand, I let him grab my own hand. He let go of my other hand but he didn't want me to pull it back to me, he pulled off the bracelets and looked up at me, "Nothing?" He sounded annoyed but still caring, "Yupp." I replied as he grabbed both my hands, bending them at my elbows, not putting much pressure into his hold, but it still hurt, but he was making it so I would look at them, "This doesn't look like nothing." I didn't reply, letting go of my hands he sat back in his chair, clucking his tongue, "What about your neck?" he sounded really annoyed, "That nothing too?"

He was being serious, more serious then I could stand, so I answered with a smirk on my face, "Gee, how'd you know?" I wouldn't have been surprised if he stormed out of the house and didn't speak to me, I was always being so mean to him that I was surprised he ever talked to me again. "Let me see." His elbow was on the table and he sat up some, rubbing his forehead with impatience. "Why?" I pulled my arms back to me, folding them in front of my face again, "Vladimira." I didn't like that, only he and Nelly could do that to me, just say my name in an impatient voice and I would let out a groan or a sigh and do what they said. I sat up some, pulling the collar of my shirt down a bit so he could see some of the bruise, I wasn't going to take off my sweatshirt, but sadly I would have to, "The whole thing." He lowered his hand from his forehead and looked up at me; I let out a groan and pulled my sweatshirt over my head, followed by two shirts at the same time. Revealing a very pale child in a black wife beater, with a bruise that spread from a few inches below the jaw to the middle of the collar bone, dark blue and yellow with a dark maroon circle in the lower part of my neck, slowly starting to shrink.

It really wasn't all that big, I don't know what he was getting all mad over, he took a deep breath and let it out slowly, closing his eyes and then looking up at me, "Who is that from?" He was staring at it as if it was going to walk away on him, I moved my hair off my right shoulder so that as it lay behind me and it would cover some of my left shoulder and the bruise, though all I wanted to do was hide behind my hair, "Nobody." I said simply, I was hoping that he didn't think that I had this done intentionally, that's the last thing I would have wanted. I finally managed to look at his face, and he looked as if he was going to cry, so I quickly looked back down at the table, his voice made me feel even worse, "Vlad... How am I supposed to help you if you don't tell me anything?" Soft and hurt, a combination I didn't like hearing in people's voices- especially Otis's.

I tried to push off the question, but it showed through in my voice, shaking and quiet, "Who said I needed help?" Pushing him away, something that I didn't like doing but I also didn't like having someone think that they needed to protect me or help me, "Nobody, I guess." He leaned back in his seat again, I forced a smirk on my face, but it wavered and he saw through it, "Nobody's a pretty popular fellow." He let out a sigh, an irritated sigh, and put his arms back on the table, staring at me, but I couldn't return the awkward favor. "Why are you protecting them?" Concern slipped into his voice, again I thought why couldn't people just be happy that I was okay at the moment, I slipped my hoodie back on, too tired to pull the shirts on too. "I'm not," and I wasn't... Not really... Okay, so I might have been- not the main focus in my mind, but I don't know why he needed to know.

"If you're afraid that they could do it again, I'll take care of it before they can." I scoffed, force of habit, felling sorry after I did it, but he could already tell that. I didn't need someone else to fix my problems; I could handle them myself- even if I don't know how yet, but there was more behind it then just my self pride. People said that all the time when I was younger and yet it never mattered, I would go and say something since they would constantly pressure me but they wouldn't do anything. Or when they tried the person had already found out and was mad at me, just making things worse. Otis looked as though he was going to begin crying, he understood why I scoffed and he excused it but I still felt bad, "I'm sorry." I was always pushing him away and I didn't want to but that's just what I always managed to do, especially when I gave him attitude like I just had done. "Listen, Vladimira..." He started slowly and I could already tell that I didn't like where this was going or where it would end. "I wasn't there when you were younger... and I'm sorry, so let me make it up now."

His voice had so many emotions in it that it didn't comfort me at all, "I didn't need anyone when I was a kid," I replied, and I still don't need anyone, I could handle myself. He didn't take offence to it but he still didn't like what I had said, I wanted to tell him that I didn't need him now but that would be a lie because I knew that I really did. He moved in his seat, as if he had caught on to me pushing him away, "Vladimira..." He didn't know what to say and that was just fine, I rather liked the silence at the moment but it didn't continue. "You can't hold grudges against everyone forever." I looked up at him, "I don't have a grudge against anyone, I never had anything against anyone to begin with." It made me somewhat angry that he thought that I was an angry person, which is ironic but true none the less. He and Vikas and Dorian all wanted me to get revenge and they were the ones that had to stick their noses in my business, I was fine keeping it all to myself, without anyone having to find out. Otis was the one that wanted me to kill D'Ablo all those times, but I forgave him even though he didn't deserve it. He looked down at the table, he couldn't look at me while he spoke, his voice hushed and concerned but truthful, "Even yourself?"

I all but screamed as I stood up from the table and moved to leave, but he quickly was next to me, grabbing my arm in a way that didn't hurt but made me stop, nothing could make me look at him right now though. We stayed standing still, I've always hated myself for the thoughts that passed through my head about my father and about all the foster fathers, it had to have been something that I did, and it was who I am that made them act that way. But I still hated them and I wanted to kill them while I was there and I still can't think about them without getting mad, but mostly I hated myself for the simple fact that I wasn't and am still not strong enough to face it all- constantly letting it get to me. If I was stronger then nothing would ever be wrong and I wouldn't constantly let people down or make them feel like they failed somehow, like Otis being sorry about not being around when I was a kid, it wasn't his fault.

I had a solution, but that was killed while in Russia a few years ago, I promised Otis and Vikas that I would no longer do anything of the sort, but I wasn't so certain. I would stab myself in the leg for everything I ever did wrong and that I was sorry for, keeping it from Nelly because the only way that I would feel forgiven is if I killed myself. I asked her to stab me if she blamed me for anything but she was shocked and offended by my remark so I quickly lied to her telling her it was a bad joke but I told it wrong. I did it for Otis also, and almost Vikas but I was stopped by Tristan, I was sorry that they felt like they failed me and that I made them put their lives on hold because I couldn't face my life and survive alone, but mostly because I took away a sister and a brother and above all else their friends. That was a long week in Russia.

Otis still held my arm and I waited for him to say something, but he didn't, he knew that I never actually did forgive myself and I deserved not to, but taking away the stabbing made it that much harder to face, and all I wanted to do was just that. Finally he found the words he wanted to say, in a soft but strong voice he spoke, "You have to forgive yourself at some point," he pulled my arm a little, wanting me to turn around, but I wouldn't, I had no right to forgive myself especially after making Otis feel like that after he found out about the whole stabby thing, but still far before he even came in the picture I had no right. He pulled a little harder and met me halfway, letting go of my arm and embracing me in a hug, locking his arms around my shoulders, I couldn't see over his own so I just turned my head to the side and looked off. I didn't deserve his hug or his love and he just reminded me how much that I have that I don't deserve.

"You never answered my question..." I brought up, I asked him while in Russia why he was so nice to me, why he wanted to teach me things and get to know me, I was just a snot nosed kid to him that he never approved of. The only thing that we had in common was my father and I had stolen him away from Otis in several different ways, stealing him from Elysia, killing him, ruining Otis's idea's of the man with memories from my past. Otis had every right to hate me and disown me but he still stuck around, I knew he loved Nelly but he couldn't have just been nice to me to stay on good terms with her would he? He didn't let go of me, but he didn't understand the question, I heard his voice echo from his lungs as my ear was pressed against his chest, "What question?" Wishing both that he would pull me away and not because I couldn't face him but I couldn't be in his hold when he told me that he hated me. My voice was shaky and I was on the verge of tears because I could loose everything in one fell swoop again, "Why are you nice to me? Why do you stay around? Why do you keep coming back, 'cuz if its just to be around Nelly you don't need to suck up to her by being nice to me..." Then I asked the major question, "Why don't you say you hate me?"

He completely ignored me the first time I asked, but his reaction this time was somewhat the same, hurt, upset, appalled, and just over all unhappy. "Would you prefer I stayed away?" "No." I hated it when he was away; I just wanted to know why he always came back. He gave a small laugh at my sudden eagerness to answer his question, "Is there a reason that I should not be nice to you, or that I should hate you?" He combined that questions but both had the same answer, "yes..." my voice was hushed but he heard me loud enough, pulling me away from him, his hands on my shoulders, looking straight into my eyes, bending down a bit to do so. "And what reason was that?" He already knew why, I never asked him because I knew he would say he blamed me but I never had the guts to say it. "Because..." I started, I couldn't look him in the eyes, but every time I tried to look away he would make me look at him again, moving his head around. "Because..." I started again, there was a lump growing in my throat, "I mean... I..." I couldn't say it.

He was trying not to laugh at my none existent tongue, but I wasn't, he looked down while closing his eyes for a second then looked back up at me, care shown that I felt like if I asked would break like glass, but I had too. "Why?" He asked again, his voice also quiet now; if it was any louder I would have jumped and ran away. "Because..." I kept trying to add more but I couldn't, I took a step back, brushing his hands off my shoulders, facing him but looking away from him. "I…. I-... I took away your brother, your friend!" I had to scream it out otherwise it never would've come, the way he looked at me made me want to curl up in a ball and hide in a dark room, he didn't look hurt by my reason but he held sympathy in his eyes, sympathy for me for reasons I don't know. He slowly closed his eyes and then looked back into my own, placing his hands on my shoulders again, "Vladimira... that fire wasn't your fault..." he always said that, but had never proved anything. "Yeah, that's what you keep saying, yet they still aren't here." I felt more tears weld in my eyes but to my amazement I managed to keep them off my cheeks, "But still even before that."

Brushing his hands off again I took another step back, there was no way that he couldn't be mad at me, I was just waiting now for him to burst and be able to take everything without showing him how it would tear me up inside. But he remained silent, looking down, "Vladimira... Why do you want me to hate you?" "I don't" I quickly yelled back in my head, I went to say it out loud but my mouth prevented me, he took another step closer, forcing me to look down and step back. Wrapping my arms around my stomach to both help control my breathing and to try and get rid of the uncomfortable feeling in my body, slouching my shoulders a bit, trying to force back tears but knowing that soon I would loose.

I fell back, leaning against the wall and sliding down still cradling my stomach and bring my face down into my knees, trying to curl up to become as small as possible so that maybe I could poof away. I did want him to hate me. I can't deal with this feeling, being forgiven, I know how to deal with hate and hurt but not this, and above all I was afraid to be happy- afraid to loose it all again. As he step towards me I quickly jumped up to my feet, heading for the door again still forcing my tears back I kept my head down. Grabbing my arm again he asked his question, "Why do I have to hate you?" his voice was loud but patient, it had to be loud now or I wouldn't be able to hear it over my own heart thumping in my ears, he pulled me again, spinning me around. "Why?" I yelled it loud so that my voice wouldn't sound shaky but it still managed to do so, yelling it was the only way that I could say it, "Because of everything! Because you should hate everything about me- about what I've done!"

My arms were no longer wrapped around my stomach but at my sides pleading with him to see my reason, tears still in my eyes but not falling down my face, I hated crying and I could always force back the tears, swallow my shame. He shifted his weight as if expecting me to try and run again, but I had already asked and now I just needed his response, his voice wasn't shaky at all but I could hear he was on the verge of tears, looking down at my feet, "Why should I hate you?" I shook my head, angry with his obviousness to my words, "I could never hate you. Even if I wanted to and even if I never met you Thomas loved you and that is enough for me." He looked up at me, I was shaking my head, pointing my finger at him and throwing my arms around, "The only reason he ever loved me was because I was his blood- That was it!"

I didn't mean to say I didn't love my father, because I did, but Otis seemed hurt by my words, although they were true on the surface, but I never wanted to look any deeper. "You know that's not true, it was never that simple." His head tipped to the side, angry that I was speaking so lowly of my father; I couldn't prove that my statement was true though… The last week I spent with him was the happiest of my life. "Yeah, well… It would be easier if it was." I turned to walk out the door but Otis quickly shut it and stood in front of me looking at me, with a look that said that this conversation wasn't over. "Why do I have to hate you?" I turned around, going to walk somewhere other then here whether outside or upstairs, "Because-" I started but quickly stopped speaking and walking when I was being choked by tears, Otis stood behind me still by the door, "Why?" He practically yelled it at me- cracking the façade I put up and I spun myself around, "Because I don't know how to deal with this!" I felt a tear slip down my cheek, which although it was only one meant so much more.

"I could handle it if you hated me- if everyone hated me- I would know what to do!" I felt more tears fall down my face, this was the first time I had never said it, aloud or in my head, "I don't know how to deal with people acting like they care!" I continued, and though it should have made me feel better it just made me feel worse, selfish. I wanted him to hate me so I could be happy, I wanted to take away everyone else's 'happiness' so I could know what to do, I threw my hands up. "And there, another reason, I'm a selfish brat." I turned back to walk away but Otis's voice rang in my ears, "How could you ever be selfish?" making me turn around to face him again, he had the look of sympathy on his face and I couldn't stand it, "Like last year! I was so worried about myself and D'Ablo, thinking that the reason you weren't around was because you finally came to your senses, I didn't even realize that you were being hurt until almost a year later!" I felt more tears fall down my face, he looked surprise, but then again this was the first he was hearing of it, the first anyone was.

"You didn't know about it. How could you have known?" He took a step away from the door, making me want to disappear but I couldn't even move my fingers anymore. Lifting my head from its view of the ground I looked up at him, "You sent me those memories- I should have figured it out!" He stomped towards me, grabbing me by the arms making me flinch thinking that he was going to be mad but instead his hold was gentle and instead, he was upset. "How could you have known?" Otis seemed to be repeating his questions a lot today, but yet every time I gave him a different answer, "I should have figured it out!" I tried to walk away but his hold was too secure, "Vikas couldn't figure it out either, so was it his fault?" He picked up my shoulder a bit, moving me so I would look back into his eyes, "Of course it wasn't-" a sad smile met his lips, in his mind he won and he cut me off, "Then how is it your's?" It didn't matter what he said, I would still continue to blame myself even though he felt like he was getting through to me.

I tried to wiggle free from his hands, but he kept his hold on me and kept moving me so I could look nowhere but his eyes, feeling another tear slip down my face, he was also crying but the tears paused for a moment, "Do you really feel that it would be easier if I hated you?" The tone in his voice suggested it was a rhetorical question, but I gave him an answer while trying to back away again, but not yelling like before, "I would know what to do." I didn't want him to hate me but at the same time I did. I dropped my head down to look at my feet, tears began to fall again and I couldn't subside them, my whole body was shaking and my shoulders trembling in his hands. He let go of my arms and wrapped me in his embrace again, my head pressed against his chest but I couldn't move, I didn't know what to do. I hated feeling like this, but I was afraid to feel any other way.

His chest slowly rose and deflated, shaking all along the way as he silently cried, I continued to try and hide my tears, but they kept coming, I rubbed my face with my sleeves, trying to get rid of the tears but as soon as they were gone new ones had already taken their place. His voice was a whisper, but loud enough for me to break down in tears, "…You don't have too…" I felt a waterfall of tears fall down my face, crashing to the ground, I buried my head in his chest, wrapping my arms around my waist again, not bothering to wipe away the tears any more. His sobs reached my ears and I felt even worse, I was making one of the people I care most about in the world cry and with that thought alone it made it worse- I had to fix this, I slowly let go of myself, grabbing and squeezing the sides of his shirt in my shaking hands. A small laugh left his throat and he leaned his head down, kissing my hair and squeezing my shoulders tighter, I was finally able to hug my uncle for the first time, I slowly looped my arms around him, grabbing at his loosely tucked in dress shirt and holding him as tight as I could.

I didn't hug people; I didn't like that sort of human interaction. While I was a kid I did, but once I lost my mother it all changed and I couldn't stand it, though I know it hurts Nelly when I try to avoid any type of interactions but I try to suffer through them for her. For the first time since I was 10, I actually chose to touch someone, not to push them away or to sturdy myself, but because I wanted to. I heard Otis give a small laugh, "The first hug my niece gives away after 6 years is to me," He lifted one of his hands and sat it on the back of my head, "I am blessed...Hopefully, the first of many." I let out a small laugh trying to stop crying, I missed holding someone close to me, I was hoping he wouldn't tell Nelly because I didn't want her to get upset with me if I couldn't find myself to hug her. But she deserves it, she's been so nice to me and she hasn't pressured me to talk to her which while I needed it at some points, I didn't want it.

We sat in the living room; I sat in the chair sideways, my knees up and against my cheeks with my hands twisted around to hold the bottoms of my feet, hiding myself in my hoodie with my two shirts still on the ground in the kitchen. I would have to hurry and move before Nelly got home unless I wanted to talk to her about what actually happened but I didn't really want to move. Otis was on the couch, halfway between laying and sitting, flipping through channels on TV. He asked that I stay downstairs and keep him company, speaking for a tiny bit here and there about something that we just saw, mostly him talking though. I fell asleep yet again, not meaning too but it was so easy too, I felt extremely light and for a few short moments I had a clear conscious so I let sleep take me over.

I slowly opened my eyes to look around and see that the living room light was off along with the TV but there was a light glaring in from the kitchen, looking over my shoulder to see the light and hear two soft voices. Someone covered me up, a blanket that wrapped around from my back over my shoulder and around my knees covering me where I wasn't touching the piece of furniture. It wasn't completely dark outside but it was darker then when I had slipped to sleep, by my judge about an hour or so later, I rotated my body, sliding my feet off the chair to lightly touch the floor. Folding the blanket and setting it on the arm of the chair I silently walked to the kitchen, pulling my hood up to hide the back of my neck and pulling my sleeves over my hands, bunching the openings into a ball in my fists, folding my arms in front of me.

Hair covering part of my face, I slowly popped up in the kitchen, leaning against the doorjamb, trying to stay unnoticeable for as long as possible which wasn't very long. I noticed Nelly sitting in the chair and Otis standing, he was doing most of the talking though I wasn't sure what they were talking about, Otis had his arms folded in front of him like me but something told me that it wasn't because he was cold too. I watched Otis but he wasn't the first to speak to me, his face looked like he was having a very serious and difficult conversation, he was staring straight ahead of him, past Nelly though, her voice sounded as though she was forcing a happy tone, "Vladimira! You're finally up." She turned her body to me, her eyes looked as though she was trying to force back tears and that she had been crying, "Yeah..." I said slowly, standing more in the kitchen now, looking back and fourth from Otis to Nelly, "What are you guys talking about?"

They were silent at first, that along with everything else told me it wasn't something pleasant, I moved the chair to the side and sat in it not resting my arms on the table but keeping them to myself incase I decided that I wanted to bolt out of there. Nelly looked back to Otis, who was still staring off into the wall, following her gaze I looked from Otis and then back to her waiting for one of them to start talking. But they didn't, they were going to tell me whatever they were talking about otherwise Nelly quickly would have lied something up, Otis stood up straight, placing one hand on his hip and rubbing his head with the other, "Another time," he caught off the conversation he was having with Nelly, "do you want to join me in my trip to New York?" He looked over in my direction, something was still bothering him but he was trying to push it off. "Yeah... when?"

He came down and sat in the chair between me and Nelly most seriousness from the previous conversation erased, "Later this month, only for three nights, a brief visit with a friend of mine." He looked up at me, a half smile on his lips and I returned the smile, looking over to Nelly to see if she agreed, her eyes were kind and her smile sweet making me feel like something was going to happen and she knew that this would make me happy till then- not a very comforting feeling. We sat in silence for a few seconds and I found myself looking down at the table waiting for one of them to begin speaking again but they didn't, raising my head up slightly I noticed that they were both staring at me. "What...?" I looked from Otis to Nelly wondering if maybe I had something on my face or if maybe she still wanted to yell at me, I looked back to Otis and back to Nelly but neither said anything. Nelly smiled and stood up, "Nothing," She placed a hand on Otis's shoulder and looked at me, "You hungry?"

I smiled at her and shook my head no, she slowly walked out of the dining room watching her leave I turned back to look at Otis who was giving me a concerned glance. "What?" I asked again, some-what jumping by the sudden change in his demeanor, his voice was casual with a slight hint of his glance, "You haven't eaten anything since I arrived." He watched me waiting to hear my response, I wasn't going to lie to him though, "I ate before I went to school..." His look didn't change, "Not very hungry." I quickly added waiting to see his reaction hoping that he would drop the subject. He placed his arms on the table, resting his head on his folded hands that were now in front of his face, he continued to stare at me, I didn't want to leave but the silence was annoying and off putting. "What were you guys talking about?"

I met his gaze but I didn't see anything reflect in his eyes to show what he was thinking, he placed his hand on my shoulder as he stood up, walking out to where Nelly had gone, he didn't want to tell me but he didn't like not telling me, so I decided to drop the subject as he kissed the top of my head and found Nelly. I stood up and found my way upstairs, they clearly weren't going to tell me, and I had a strange craving for food but it was a nauseating thought, and I was still tired. As I made my way to my bedroom I felt so alone, a cold emptiness that pierced up my heart, I didn't understand why though, Nelly and Otis were in the kitchen... but then again it wasn't the only thing that was really getting to me. I closed the door to my bedroom, leaning against it for a second before pushing myself off it and towards my bed, not bothering to turn on the light because I would be sleeping soon anyway. I fell on my bed, still only having a blanket on it, but it was more than comfy, I was lying on my stomach, my feet hanging over the edge of the bed as my hand slithered up and sat under the weight of my head. It had been such a long day, but it appeared that it wasn't going to dissolve into sleep and tomorrow yet.

I cold breeze tickled the hairs that fell on the back of my neck, causing me to lift my head and turn over to lay on my side, facing my door, my hand still under my head, ignoring the pain from the now smaller bruises on my wrists and neck. I was still asleep but I slowly awoke when I rose a little on the bed as another weight was placed on it, I didn't feel like moving though so I kept my eyes closed and tried to go back to bed. Something pressed the bed in front of my stomach, rubbing against my hip and stomach in the process, slowly I opened my eyes, feeling a fogginess in my head still, I tried to focus my eyes on what this was, an arm. I would have jumped if I had enough energy, but I didn't, so I just slowly rolled my head back followed the arm to a shoulder, a shoulder to a neck and then to a face, though it was dark I was able to see small distinct features and I instantly knew who it was, Dorian. I let out a groan, returning my head to how it was, wrapping my hands around my head so I could try to go back to sleep, hoping that maybe this was just a dream, but after I finally managed to force my eyes open and stay open I realized that this must not be a dream, which means I really need to get up. He was sitting on my bed with his arm pressed to the front side of me, blocking me in, I would've rolled my entire body over but his side was pressed against my back after I moved just a few inches, I noticed a smile on his lips, he didn't plan on moving. I stayed laying under him, I was in no mood to put up a fight or to be anything but sleeping, briefly wondering as to why he was here, but then not really caring.

"That's not very nice." His voice sent a shiver down my spine, his voice was smooth and effortless, I didn't understand at first but then I remembered that he was reading my mind… again. "I came all the way out here, and you don't care if I'm here?" he leaned a little closer, forcing another shiver to go down my spine and goose bumps to form on my covered arms. "I'm sorry…" I didn't want him to think that I didn't care- that he wasn't important, "I'm just tired…" I added, I still felt sorry about my yelling at him this morning and saying what I had said, basically bitching at him, I waited for his reply but he didn't say anything, instead I watched as a smile grew on his face. "What?" I thought maybe I had something on my face, thinking that he was laughing at me, but he shook his head as I brought my arm up to wipe my face, softly he grabbed my wrist and I didn't even notice his hold till I couldn't move my arm anymore. Looking up at him I waited for him to say something, hoping that he wasn't planning on draining me of blood again or killing me- I wasn't in the mood to die, but his smile only stayed on his face and I heard a small laugh. "I don't believe that people are ever in that mood." He leaned a little closer again and I started to push into the bed, more of his side was touching my side and his arm was now pressed against my stomach and hip- resting on it. Freezing, he sensed that I wasn't very comfortable with what he was doing- that I didn't know what he was doing exactly, he kept his distance but didn't back up, after a few moments of silence when I assumed he wasn't going to move any closer I asked him a question, "Why exactly are you here?" Smiling like that was the thousand dollar question he leaned closer and whispered in my ear, his face brushing against mine, "To see you."

I almost blushed, I tried to swallow it but I knew my face still turned a little red, he pulled back a little, holding his face only a few inches from my own, staring into my eyes, a smile on his face, I was thinking that maybe he didn't really come to see me but instead just to taste my blood, he leaned back a little more. "Why?" I asked out loud, why not just ask instead of assume, he was silent for a little while, so I assumed it was just for my blood, but his voice came out soft and caring, "Just to see you." I gave him a questioning glance and he just smiled again, "You're not going to drink my blood?" I noticed he still had his hand gently holding my wrist with his fingers fitting into the groves of the bruises but not hurting, he shifted a little closer and leaned back down, "Not unless you want me to." He laughed, but for some reason I only felt more blood rush to my face, he kept his face next to me which only made me blush more because I felt him give a small laugh- his breath sliding through my ear and pushing my hair around, when he felt my cheek get warmer. After a few short seconds he sat back up slightly, looking at my face but I was frozen, I had no idea what to say to him or what to do, his arm was still on my side and while I didn't like human contact I strangely wanted him to keep his arm around my waist, but I made sure not to think it.

Trying to slide up and out of his hold- to sit up, I raised my arm but quickly fell off it when I realized that my still bruised wrist couldn't take that kind of pressure so instead I was forced to lean on my elbow, which didn't allow me to slide out but instead push me tighter into his grasp. Sitting there for a few minutes I waited for him to move but he didn't, I waited for him to say something but he didn't, I had no idea what to say or do so I just sat still and stared into his eyes, although he was looking at me our eyes never met, as if he was admiring my face, which made me drop my head back down and be smothered in the mattress and blanket as soon as I thought that he was looking at my face. Face down in the bed with one arm pulled up to my side, I blushed at the slight thought but I wasn't safe in my mind so I couldn't think anything which only made me that less sure of what to do, I felt him shift on my bed. Leaning closer his breath moved the hairs on the back of my neck, his hand sliding up a little on the bed so his arm could bend around my waist, "We don't have to do anything Vladimira." He pulled his arm tighter so it was no longer rested against my hoodie but now pressing against my actual solid form, his warmth seeping through the fabric, I blushed again- why did I keep blushing, normally I would freak out and push them away, but blush? Not my normal reaction. His hand slithered into the bed and before I could realize his hand was holding my ribcage, he flipped me over so I was now mostly on my back but my body now tipped toward him. Feeling my face staring to get warmer I tried to act cool, "So, this is not doing anything?" his hand was still at my side though I barely noticed its hold on my hip, he finally brought his other hand back into my vision and set his hand next to my head and leaned forward again, whispering into my right ear now, "Mhm. This is not doing anything." His voice was quiet so it didn't vibrate my ear drum but it was almost too quiet and I almost missed it, his voice sounded restrained, I felt my face getting warm again, "… What's doing something then?" the feeling he gave off spoke as if something ticked, breathing closer to my neck now, moving his head down a bit he pressed something soft and moist against my neck, right behind my jaw bone, I could feel his almost uneasy breaths escape his nose, slowly opening his mouth and lightly pressing his normal teeth against the still wet area. Pulling the skin on my neck into his mouth, his hand squeezing a bit harder on an area around my hip, I felt a small warmth shoot up my body. My face got another shade of pink as he began to suck at the skin on my neck, I noticed that his hand was actually on my bare hip, pushing his thumb at an area that dropped off the bone- sinking in pretty deep because I had very prominent hip bones. My heart beat began to rise but I stayed still, still a bit too unsure as to what to do, I felt him hold his breath for a second and then quickly begin breathing again, his thumb rotating it's pressure on my hip as his other hand pushed harder into the bed, then quickly was against my side, pressing against my rib and sliding down it, sliding off my side and onto my actual stomach his hand kept going lower and lower.

Dorian's body was trembling, along with random little tremors from my own body, his hand sliding down my rib tightly and then almost unnoticeable over my outer stomach till I felt his hand slide a little under my pants as he grabbed my other hip, causing my hip to jump back a little and press into the bed which only made my back arch a bit into him. At some point Dorian went from lightly pressing his upper body against me, just barely noticeable, to his left knee lying flat between my own knees while his right knee stayed bent up a little and outside my left knee. Slowly straightening his knee his body was pressed against mine as he dug his fingers into my hips and his mouth slid down my neck, biting at the base of my neck to almost my shoulder, on the un-bruised side, my right side. Not using his vampire teeth though, he pulled at the skin lightly, sending small shakes to wither up my body, blushing while my hips randomly jerked back, feeling his own hips rolling against my leg, he was pushing his feet against my bed to push harder onto me as his thumbs moved in a little and down a bit more, pushing a little softer but the effect still felt the same to me. Twitching, my back arched into him again and he quickly slid across my skin and up to my mouth, pressing his lips against my own, his eyes squeezed close while mine remained half closed, his tongue sliding over my bottom lip and pushing against it as if expecting to get further, but I didn't open my mouth. His hands let go of my hips reluctantly and moved to the center of where they were placed, his fingertips just barely reaching my belly button, his hands flat on my waist as they began to slowly slide up my stomach, under my shirts. Once he reached about the middle of my stomach his hands spread a bit and wrapped around my ribs and held me from the back, still pressing into my lips, his placed his hands in the center of my bare back, knowing that his fingers were resting on my scars made my mouth open a tiny bit- to try to tell him to stop. But once my mouth lost its lock I felt his tongue slide into my own mouth, it shot in at first- pushing against my teeth and my own tongue, bringing my hands up I pushed against his collar bones, trying to get him off, but he only pressed against me harder. He was pushing his fingers into my back, catching on the scarred but smooth skin while he also bit my lip, "Ow" I thought, and he froze, my eyes were squeezed shut but once his tongue stopped moving, along with everything else, I slowly unclenched them and opened my eyes to look and see that his own eyes were open and watching my face again. His eyes were half open as if he was about to sleep and his hands slowly slid off my back and pulled out from under my shirt, while his tongue was still in my mouth, but as soon as his hands were resting on my thighs- over the pants, I pulled my head away, turning back onto my side, bringing my knees up a little and folding my arms so my forearms rose and covered my still a bit red face. Staying still for a few seconds I was hoping that maybe he would decide to just leave, although I didn't really want him to leave- blushing once I realized that he probably heard that, I turned my head into the bed more and pushed my folded arms harder against my face, the skin around my hips hurt now and it felt like they were bruised along with my tongue now.

Dorian leaned over me again, but I tried to not get any closer, not if he was going to shove his tongue back down my throat and give me any more bruises, but I ran out of places to sink into, I felt his breath on my hands, he began to move the hair off the part of my now flushed face, without moving my hands though. His movements were slow but I noticed that my arms were moving as he held my wrists and turned me so I couldn't hide in the bed anymore, but I couldn't look at him, his weight shifted as his face was closing in on my own, squeezing my lips shut to brace myself while pushing my head into the bed, wanting to turn back over but he held my wrists softly against my shoulders, still trying to squirm free I shook my head a little, but he didn't press his lips against my own this time. Instead I felt his lips press against the middle of my forehead, slowly I loosened my squeezing lips and let my head just rest on the bed, blood flow returned to my face though I wasn't blushing. Softly his lips left my forehead and he opened his eyes to look into my own as his face was inches above my almost blushing face, I didn't want him to leave. I noticed a small smirk on his lips, his dark yet light eyes half open still, his voice soft, deep, and quiet, "Let's not do anything…" although I wasn't smiling I nodded, noticing that his hands were still holding my arms loosely and slowly they let go and sunk into the bed at the sides of my shoulders but my wrists still stayed on my shoulders. "That was the plan…. I just want to sleep." I said, trying to erase the funny feeling that was still there after everything he pulled, his eyes closed as he smiled, "Then that's what we shall do." Before I processed what he had said, I was on my side again, my arms folded against my chest loosely as his body pressed against my backside, his arms wrapped around me, his head tipped against my own with his feet interlocking with mine, I felt blood rushing to my face. I went to speak but he spoke before I could, "Sleep now… You have school in the morning." His voice sounded a bit disappointed when he added the last part, "I'm sorry." My voice quiet and smooth, I didn't now exactly why I was sorry but he seemed… upset? With me and I didn't know what else to do or say, so I stayed still, my face returning to normal temperature. Keeping my eyes open I looked at the edge of the bed, this felt extremely strange- not good but not bad, but my mind didn't want to think but I still didn't let it rest, Dorian's voice came in soft and quiet as he pulled me a little closer, "You should sleep… your body's still tired." My eyes closed a little to his voice but I forced sleep to hold on, at least for as long as I could stay out of its clutches, "I don't know why, I slept all day." My voice wasn't as soft as his but just as quiet, I felt him give a small laugh. "I know."

Forcing my eyes open, my eyebrows moved to a questioning glace although he couldn't see, "How do you know?" I should have felt creeped out but I didn't, "I was around you all day, from your sleeping in classes, the office, to here on the couch and your bed." The edges of my cheeks go a little warm but I didn't try to hide it, "Do you know who brought me to my bed?" I was really hoping that it wasn't Otis, when he finds me safe but unconscious he tends to stare at bruises and watch my mind. "I would hope… It was me." His voice was so matter of fact but I felt my face grow hotter, sliding my knees up a little, my feet sliding up his legs, my voice came out quiet but smooth, "Thank you…" I felt awkward now, if he could see my face I would probably be apologizing that something that most people see as simple, but I didn't, I would be blushing at, I felt him take a deep breath and when he exhaled it moved the hair around on my back of my neck. Forcing a shiver to go down my spine, when he felt me give a small shake he stopped breathing for a second, "I'm sorry…" his silence was making me feel like an idiot and a pervert, though I wasn't really being perverted, he nuzzled his face closer into the side and back of my head, holding me a bit tighter, "No…" his voice was even softer now and I wanted to turn over and look at him, hoping that I didn't offend him or anything but he continued, "Sleep." My eyelids started to flutter shut, the sudden need to stay awake and my eyes were slowly closing, my muscles slowly relaxing against him, but before I was completely blocked off from the world I heard his voice another time. "You really are too adorable."