"I just feel awful now."
"That understandable, you guys were together for a very long time."
"It feels like she shot me a million times."
"Break ups hurt."
Beck felt himself get angry.
He stood up and went to his dresser. From the drawer he withdrew a small black box with a heart on top.
"She took away my life plan, Tori." He said, and threw her the box.
She opened it and gasped. "When were you planning to do this?"
"When she walked on stage to get her diploma." He said, with a shutter.
"Oh, Beck." She felt a tear fall from her eyes.
"But never mind now. She's gone and wants me to forget and remember her."
"That doesn't make any sense." Tori said, with a sniffle.
"Tell me about it." He said, with a laugh.
It felt good to laugh. With all the pain of today, laughter was a good medicine.
"We should go out." Tori suggested.
"Where?"
"Let's go to Robby's house." She started, and it looked like she was thinking, "he's got his own place now and he's got that stash of liquor."
"Alcohol?" he asked, feeling slightly afraid of the term.
"Oh, you can handle it. It'll take some of the pain away."
Without another thought, he stood up and grabbed his coat. Without even asking, Tori said that she would drive. He turned out the lights, locked the door, and found himself sitting in Tori's car. They passed house after house. In some of them, you could see happy families eating.
Just a reminder of what I could've had. Beck thought.
His thoughts had turned from guilty to revengeful and hate. He couldn't explain it. He just felt the sudden urge to hit and punch and never stop. He felt the anger boil up and watch to grab something and squeeze until every last little bit of life was drained from it.
You're never going to be normal if you keep thinking like that. Said a little voice in his head.
Normal is overrated. Beck replied, wondering if this was the beginning of insanity.
They arrived at Robby's house and walked up the stairs. They knocked on the door and was greeted by Cat, who had a bottle of vodka in one hand and a can of Ginger Ale in the other.
"Hey! What are you guys doing here?" she yelled, flinging herself onto Beck.
She smelled of alcohol and had a slightly tipsy quality in her balance. Exactly how much has she had to drink tonight?
"We came to have a little bit of fun," Tori spilled, staring at Robby.
He was sitting a blue sofa with his shirt off, small little hairs protruded from his chest.
"Put your shirt on, Robby." Cat said, with a little laugh.
Apparently, they were about to have fun. Grown up fun….
That's exactly what you need, Beck. The voice said again.
Shut the hell up, would you? He screamed silently to himself.
"So, why weren't you at graduation?" Robby asked, pulling his sweatshirt over his t-shirt.
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Why not?" Cat asked, looking even more interested than Robby.
"I just don't, okay. Let's drink."
He grabbed a plastic cup from the kitchen and poured himself something from a blue glass bottle. He took a drink and spit it out in the sink. It tasted a little like stale urine. He grabbed a Coke from the fridge and emptied the can into his cup. Then he took another sip. Much better.