It is just past lunch and Peeta just walks in with the mail. He holds up a letter for me, leaves it on the counter and descends into his art-room to do the bills and perhaps paint a bit before dinner.
I stride over to see the letter, wondering who it could be from. It doesn't look like a District 11 letter, which usually has stickers all over it that the children decorate for their 'Girl on Fire'.
It has a stamp on the corner that says '2'. My breathing stops. All I can think of is Gale.
Gale.
I haven't thought about him in-more years than I can remember. I have tried not to think about the past, which brings haunting reminiscences to me.
I stare at the letter for a while before I open it.
Cheesy is pawing at my ankle, begging me to play with him. "Stop Cheesy!" I can't help but yell.
Peeta walks in, alarmed, and comes beside me. He realizes it's from 2 and takes my head into his hands and turns my face towards his. "You don't have to open it,"
"I know," I nod and turn back toward the letter. "But I…need to."
He sighs and picks up Cheesy, which seems to calm the wild dog. "If it helps, I'll leave with Cheesy while you read it." Peeta suggests, starting to move down the hallway, to our bedroom.
"Okay," is all I can say.
I slowly open the letter and the handwriting is familiar. It has improved, but it's still the same handwriting as a dear friend I once knew long ago. Gale.
I try to stop the tears from falling as I read the letter. I am glad that Peeta isn't here with me to see me crying over a letter from Gale, and reading what it says. But I want his comfort right now. I need his comfort.
Katniss, you don't know how sorry I am. I can't blame you for not talking to me for seven years, eight months, and five days. I'm counting, Katniss. I haven't forgotten. I hope you can forgive me. I think it's time we forgot about the past and we moved on. It's hell here in District 2. I want with everything to be back in 12, hunting with you on Sundays. I wish we could go back to those old days. I am working in the factory all day until after dinner and then I rise at 3:30 to go to the factory again, building trains for the rest of Panem. I need to see you, Katniss. And if that can't happen, I need you to at least reply. Gale
What a façade he is putting on. He doesn't want to see me that badly. If he did, then he would've traveled to 12 already. It's been seven years. If he really missed me, he would have talked to me sooner. He betrayed me and how could I ever forgive him? Never. Yes, that's the answer. I could never forgive him.
Peeta walks in and I quickly wipe a tear from my cheek. "What's Cheesy doing?" I ask, trying to act as if everything were alright.
"Never mind about Cheesy, he's outside, chasing butterflies or something. What's wrong?" he comes beside me and I hand him the letter. He reads the letter and nods, as if he expected a letter like this. "Well, are you going to see him?"
"Are you crazy, Peeta? Of course, not and you would not be okay with that."
"Katniss. I love you more than anyone else in the world ever can. But Gale has been your best friend ever since forever. Are you going to throw away all those memories?"
"Yes, I believe I can. And will." I say.
"Is that your final decision? I'm not saying you have to go. But, I recommend you make it right with Gale. I would, if I were you."
"No." I shoot back. "If you were me, you'd understand why I can't go back to 2. I just can't."
"Alright." He sighs and hands the letter back to me.
I'm counting, Katniss. I haven't forgotten.
The words pound in my head. Maybe I should go to District 2. Maybe I should think this over. He obviously cares a little, at least, if he knows how many days have gone by. Well, I can't change my mind this quickly. A second ago I told myself I could never forgive him. And now, I am contemplating if I can forgive him. A wave of guilt moves over me as I am re-thinking what I said.
"Peeta?"
"Yeah, Kat?"
"I'm going to District 2."