Grell, William,Ronald, and Undertaker, all belong to Kuroshitsuji

I do not own Kuroshitsuji or any of the characters. They belong to the wonderful Yono Toboso.

Ch. 2

There's No Place Like Home

Finally Will was home. He had managed to scoop up Ronald before he could got to Robin's house. Will had him hosted over his arm like a sack of potatoes. Ronald was laughing and giggling and squirming until finally William put him down on the floor of the house. Ronald kept laughing. "We sure got you didn't we Will!" Laughed Ronald, "I had you runnin' all over the place!" He smiled over to Grell who was relaxing on the dusty old stuffed chair flipping through an old catalog he had nipped out of the trash from behind the local dress and flower shop. "You should of seen it Grell!" giggled Ronald who skipped over to him and plopped himself in the stuffed couch next to him. Ronald coughed as dust flew up in the air from the couches pillows.

Will frowned. "Grell!" He scolded "Weren't you supposed to knock the dust out of the couch!" Grell groaned "I will, I will, I just haven't gotten around to it!" Grell stuck his head further in the catalog.

"Grell!" William growled at the middle child. "if you don't start doing your share of the work around here!"

"My share of work!" Grell proclaimed appalled that William, his own brother, was accusing him of laziness. "I do plenty of work around here! I was busy!"

"Doing What?"

"Babysitting Ron!"

"And then?"

"Checking the rat traps!"

"And then?"

"And then...and then I took a little break." Grell said slipping down in his chair. "Is that such a crime?"

William shook his head at his younger sibling, rolling his eyes. "Well sooorry that one little thing happened to slip my mind! Okay! I'll do it later! It's no big deal!"

"No big deal?" William shouted, "No big deal? It's a big deal Grell! You can't shirk on your responsibilities!Someday your gonna have to get a job and you can't just forget to things there!" Grell and Ronald exchanged glances, judging by the look on Will's face this conversation was far from over...Will was about to go into an all out responsibilities, responsibilities, responsibilities, speech. Grell sighed and went back to his catalog where they didn't lecture you on such menial things such as responsibilities. Where dressing responsibly or comfortably was considered a crime and was punishable by social suicide.

Just when Grell was drifting off to hand glove heaven William, snatched the catalog out of Grell's hand. "What are you reading anyway?" William asked annoyed that Grell wasn't listening like he should have been.

"Nothing you wold be interested in!" Grell answered grabbing his catalog back.

Will snatched it back and flipped through it frustratedly. Will's face showed anger "Are you really so determined to shirk you responsibilities (Grell rolled his eyes, 'lets see how many times has he said responsibilities, like ninety?' he thought), that your willing to read a foppish old catalog about women's clothing!"

Grell's face went red as he swiped the catalog back."Like I said," mumbled Grell "you wouldn't be interested."

Will sighed and placed his hands on his hips. "I'm sorry Grell it's just...I worry about you and if you don't start owning up to you responsibilities (again!) then..."

"All right mother!" grumbled Grell.

Will's face went red. This was another nickname Grell used that agitated William. Only this name didn't just annoy Will, this hurt Will. Will's mother was very weak and actually wasn't even supposed to have children. After having Grell she was very weak, and after having Ronald she became very sick. William could barely remember their mother's face. She was sick that Grell didn't remember at all, and Ronald was so young...

William bit his lip, controlling his anger and tears. He just couldn't loose it in front of his little brothers. Despite what they may believe they needed him. He was the strong one, the responsible one, the rock. Pulling himself together he huffed out. "Where's dad?"

"Out." said Grell simply.

"Out where?" asked William annoyed.

"Running errands." replied Grell.

"What kind of errands?"

"I DON'T KNOW! MORTIAN ERRANDS! PARENT ERRANDS! WHO THE HELL KNOWS! HE SAID HE'D BE BACK IN AN HOUR GOD STOP ASKING ME DUMB QUESTIONS!"

Grell jumped out of his stuffed chair and stomped down the hall. "Where are you going?" William shouted toward him.

"TO MY ROOM!" Grell screamed back slamming the door to his room behind him, which made the whole house shake. William sighed and began rubbing the bridge of his nose and fixing his glasses the way he does when he's irritated. He plopped on to the couch which of course caused dust to fly everywhere. Will and Ronald coughed until the dust cleared off.

"William?" whimpered Ronald shyly curling up towards his eldest brother.

"Yes Ronald?" asked William in the nicest voice he could passable muster at the current moment.

"Why do you think Grell is so upset about? Is he...is he... mad at me?" Ronald asked shyly.

William smiled leave it to the youngest to assume its all his fault.

"No Ronald, I don't think Grell is mad at you. Though me might be mad at me. But don't worry about it, its' just a little fight, we have those all the time. You know that." replied Will gently.

"Yeah," said Ronald "Your probably right." He thought for a while. "William?"

"Yes Ron?"

"You shouldn't be so hard on Grell."

William sighed. Perhaps he had been a little hard on Grell. But somebody had to snap him out of wonderland and it might as well be him.

"Promise you won't be so hard on Grell next time?" begged Ronald staring with big puppy dog eyes toward Will. Will shook his head, no one would resist Ronald's puppy dog eyes.

"I Promise." he said smiling down and the youngest brother.

Satisfied Ron placed his head on his big brothers shoulder. "Sorry about running away earlier. Me and Grell were just playing around."

"I know Ron, I forgive you."

"Good, hey Will, if I'm reeeally good, can I go run over and play with Robin today? Please? I haven't seen her in so long and I want to show her the neat impaling thing Grell showed me? Think she'd like it? It's really cool isn't it Will?"

Will winced at the thought, "Um, not tonight Ronald, it's getting awfully late." answered Will.

"Awwww," whined Ron, "But I wanna go," Going anywhere actually seemed to be the last thing on Ron's mind, his eyes were closing and his head was laying gently on Will's shoulder, soon he was yawning and in a matter of time he was napping peacefully.

Will smiled. You couldn't blame Ron for being so sweet. Somebody had to after all. What with Grell being a psychopathic, compulsive lying, juvenile delinquent and their dad being a creepy old insane mortician, and Will was so busy trying to hold everything together that he didn't have time to stop and smell the flowers. But he truly did love these moments with his youngest brother. Grell was sometimes sweet like this too but obviously tonight Grell wasn't going to cuddle up with Will anytime soon.

Eventually Will carried Ronald to his room, tucking him in Will proceeded to walk to the kitchen to start preparing dinner. He wondered into the kitchen to find written in typical Undertaker handwriting was a note. To be more exact it was a piece of wood with the note: Out carved on it. Why he'd go to such trouble Will would never understand. He could already hear the Undertaker's answer, "Oh just for Shits and Giggles, you know that Willie!"

William shook his head, his father always had a unique sense of humor. In other words he found anything and everything hilarious. He recalled one of his favorite jokes that he would tell customers:

"Once there where two very good friends named Bob and Larry, everyday Bob and Larry would go into the park. They would have a lovely time, eating ice cream, feeding duckies, and playing a nice long game of Cricket. After their game of Cricket they would sit and eat their sandwiches on a nice park bench. One day Bob said to Larry 'Ey Larry, do you think there's Cricket in Heaven?'

'Well I dunno,' Larry replied, 'maybe there is Cricket in heaven...tell you what, lets make an agreement. If one of us dies and goes to heaven before the other does, then they 'ave to come back five days later at this very spot to tell the other whether or not theirs Cricket in heaven! How does that sound!'

'That sounds great!' Bob replied, so the two men made the agreement.

Sure enough, 3 weeks later Larry died. Bob was very sad and missed his friend. Five days after his death, in honor of his memory he wondered in the park and sat at the bench were they always ate sandwiches together. Sure enough Larry appeared. Bob was over joyed to see his friend again. They reminisced about his life, told each other of their current adventures. Eventually Bob asked:

'So is there Cricket in heaven?'

'Well,' replied Larry 'I have good news and bad news...'

'Whats the good news?' asked Bob

'Well the good news is that yes, there is Cricket in heaven!'

'That's great!' shouted Bob who couldn't imagine any news that could be bad enough to ruin such good news, 'Whats the bad news?'

'Well,' replied Larry, 'The bad news is, you pitching on Friday!'

The Undertaker would then proceed to start cackling and and howling at his own joke.

'Ha ha ha ha ha! You're pitching on Friday! Get it! That means 'es gonna die! Ha ha ha ha ha!'

As you can imagine this didn't exactly calm the nerves of his customers who were often there for extremely unpleasant reasons and didn't exactly feel up to a good joke. 'Perhaps that's why he's the way he is,' thought Will 'Maybe it's a way to keep himself from going mad.' Will sighed 'If that's the case it sure back fired' thought Will recalling the cackling old kook. Most of the people in the neighborhood thought he was crazy, the more superstitious people were convinced we was some sort of warlock or witch doctor. Either way he manged to scare the begeebies out of almost every child in town, and a fair amount of adults as well. Most people didn't even realize he had children.

William started preparing some stew for dinner. He looked through the cupboards. Everything in the kitchen, the cupboards, the ice box, the cabinets, the shelves, also doubled as a storing area for all of Undertaker's extra supplies. Seeing such disturbing utensils could make others loose their appetite. But everyone in this house was so used to it they thought nothing of it.

Their 'house' was also their 'shop' or 'Emporium' ,as Undertaker liked to call it, their 'morgue' and their home. The front of the building was dedicated to the emporium. The front was divided into two big rooms and one small office. One of the big rooms included the entrance and the actual shop part which sold coffins and flowers and other little things people might need when a loved one dies. The other room, which was divided from the shop with a large curtain, was the storage room, set aside for extra merchandise and building coffins and other arts and crafts enjoyed by the Undertaker. The Undertaker's office, which is where most his other pieces of business was taken' care of, was a small simple room filled with a desk some chairs and some filing cabinets. There was a door in his office which led to the back of the shop which was their home. A ramshackle place to say the least. It had a kitchen which connected with a long table where they ate and acted as the divider between the kitchen and the sitting room. The sitting room took up most of the back, it had a big dusty grey couch, a large stuffed chair that was slowly falling apart, and a rickety old rocking chair that screeched every time Undertaker would rock in it. Which was all the time. There was a creaky thin door that led to the backyard which was fenced in with a gate. The sitting room connected with the hallway. Down the hallway there where six rooms. Four where Undertaker's, William's, Grell's and Ronald's bedrooms. One was an extra closet. And the last was the bathroom. The basement was the morgue which contained most of Undertakers other supplies, or at least the things that would be too unsanitary to keep sitting in the kitchen. The Undertaker did most of his work here.

Truth be told the Undertaker didn't get many customers with a family. Usually he did most of his work with unknowns. He was often handed the most disgusting cases, doing work with the most mutated or distorted bodies. He was the best in the business when it came to that. He would often talk to the cadaver as if it where a customer. 'Well my pretty,' he would swoon to his "patients" 'You certainly got your self mucked up didn't you? Don't worry darling, Undertaker will straightened you all out and soon I'll have you looking good enough to be buried in!'

Since Undertaker was so good at what he did, and because he didn't muddle around with funerals and the like, he was offend granted the cadavers of murder victims and mysterious dead bodies found in the street. They were often brought in by the police. Many law officials would come to him asking questions about his "customers". He was well respected and had plenty of work when it came to the law. "As long as people keep hangin''" Undertaker would say, "Then business is bangin'" (Undertaker was granted every executioned cadaver and every criminal killed in prison.) As long as they lived in London, plenty of bodies where sure to come running in.

But still, because he didn't do fancy funerals or anything like that, he rarely got richer customers and he got little money for the bodies he did prepare. But he enjoyed his work and he believed he was living well within his means. "William," he'd say to his oldest son "being a mortician is a good business! I want you know Willie, that one day, you can take over the family business, you and anyone of your brothers!" Undertaker had taught his boys all the basic tricks of the trade. Not so much to scar the poor dears no, but enough for them to be ready to try and take over the business when the time came.

William sighed as he stirred the measly pot of stew he had managed to throw together. The Undertaker needs to get more food for the kitchen, then again that's probably what he's out for. William knew that it was going to be his responsibility to take over the morgue after the Undertaker died. Truth be told though, this was not what he wanted. He wanted to get out of these dim and dirty London streets, he wanted to travel, to work his way up in society. And William knew he could do it, he could work his way up, he was smart and dedicated, but he knew he couldn't disappoint the Undertaker. He tasted the stew..."Perhaps it could do with a little extra salt" murmured William. Sprinkling salt into the stew he continued to stir. He checked the fire to make sure it was still burning hot enough to cook. Their stove fire had a nasty habit of going out for no apparent reason.

William couldn't wait for tomorrow, it would be his first day at a real, upper level school. Uniforms and everything. This would be William's chance to prove himself. He was still in awe at how the opportunity came about. It was like a blessing from heaven or a wish finally granted true. A man had came in, giving some work to the Undertaker as usual, he really didn't know much about the actual details. All he knew was that the man was dean to a very powerful school and was so impressed by the Undertaker's services, that he offered to let Undertaker's sons into the prestigious school of Dowey and Beck, free of charge. He even paid for the boys' uniforms, books, and supplies. William and his brothers' luck with other schools weren't to successful. They had managed to get kicked, suspended, and bullied out of just about every public school. But this time would be different, this time his brothers would take it seriously, he would make his brothers take it seriously, even if it killed him (or them).

"Mmmmmm, I smell something cooking!" said a crackly voice coming from the Undertaker's office. The old man walked through the office door leading to the kitchen. "Stew again, Willie?" the elder inquired. "Always a pleasure." He smiled and gave William a pat on the head. "Though I'm sure you didn't have much to work with." The Undertaker continued placing his bags on the table. "But I knew that there would be enough for our conservative little Willie to mix something up." William smiled, yes he usually hated it when people called him Willy or Willie...but when the Undertaker called him that, it didn't seem to bother him for some reason. The old man started unloading the groceries.

"The other's asleep?" the elder asked.

"Yeah," William answered, "There all in their rooms."

William took the stew off the pot and began pouring it into separate wooden bowls. He placed the bowls on the table for him and the Undertaker to eat. The old man mean while finished putting all the groceries away and then sat to eat dinner with his eldest boy.

"You're really excited about that new school tomorrow aren't you?" The Undertaker proclaimed smiling.

William couldn't help but smile back. "Yeah," he answered, "I always wanted to go to a proper school like that. I hope I do well."

"Oh you'll do great Willie,your brothers on the other hand...they don't exactly do as well in all that posh academic stuff."

William frowned, "I know they can do well if they just take it seriously...that's their problem! They don't take things seriously they..."

The Undertaker stoped him, "Now Willie, you know as well as I do that your brothers are good boys, Ronald's just young, that's all, he has too much energy to deal with, and Grell. Well, Grell's Grell and there's really nothing and no one who could really do anything about that."

William sighed. He knew his father was right. He just wanted this new school, this once in a life time chance, to work out. And in order for that to happen William knew that tomorrow would have to go perfectly.