Wow! Thanks for all the reviews guys! Hope you enjoy chapter four.

Disclaimer: Don't own Narnia, but do own the plot.

All five merchant's stared at the screen in disbelief each of them thinking the exact same thing; out of all the bizarre stuff we've read today, just this title beats them all.

Edmund was the first to come out of his trance, "Give me it! I want to read this one!" He said reaching for the object, but Peter beat him to it.

"Ugh; uh! You've already had your turn!"

Edmund glared at his older brother, "So did you!"

While the two brothers continued bickering like five year-olds, poor Lucy the Valiant, was pale and shaking. "Mr. Tumuns-oh dear, Mr. Tumuns!" The young Queen sobbed before falling to her knees as she screamed at the heavens (Well, the ceiling anyway.) "WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO YOU?"

"Apparently they've made him a pedophile," Caspian muttered "Not to mention a, um… non-furry leg seeker."

Susan raised her eyebrows at his last comment, but even she couldn't hold the giggles for long. Meanwhile, Lucy was pounding the ground with her fists crying "Why, why, why?" Over and over again along with a few other comments, "We wrote R.I.P on his tombstone! How is he supposed to rest now? Can't they leave a dead guy alone?"

While Susan and Caspian watched that scene; the boy's had finally ended their pointless argument by coming to the decision that they would take turns…oh dear… "I'll go first," The High King declared, causing unfortunate Lucy to cry ever so harder. It was only then that Peter sent a glance towards his sister, looking a little frightened.

"What's wrong, Pete?" Caspian questioned, stepping over the bawling 'Valiant' Queen in the process.

"I'm worried, that she might be getting her…" Here he leaned in closer to both boys and finished in a whisper "Monthly gift."

Both dark haired Kings eyes widened in horror "You don't mean…"

Peter nodded gravely, "I'm afraid so."

All three boys turned to the two Queens, the youngest hysterical, the eldest coxing her. "Shh, it'll be alright now, shh…"

"He-he won't even kn-know what h-hit him!" Lucy sobbed, clutching her older sister tightly "I'll b-be li-like he's in a ni-nightmare."

The three Kings stood there, not daring to say the cause of this outburst intill one brave soul did. "The curse of the period…" Edmund whispered, making the two other Kings shudder as they felt the cold chills on their backs, which always happened when that was mentioned.

They stayed frozen in that state for a few more minutes, the only sound being Lucy's bawling and Susan's supposedly comforting words of "Shh, there, there it'll be alright."

Finally the Telmarine King gained the nerve to speak "Should we not read it? It might make things worse."

The High King shook his head "It most cases it would have, but when it comes to this particular…" The fair haired king struggled to find the right word; disease? Enemy? Now don't get me wrong, the High King knew exactly what that…um, specific time of the month was for; thanks to his father who explained it to him after he had to endure the torture that was his mother's random mood swings. And even though he knows it's meant to be a blessing from God, Peter just couldn't help thinking that it was a so called blessing from Sainte instead.

Shaking his head the High King continued "It'll be better if we read. That way, once we're done Lucy will know that the danger has passed and she'll be cheerful again, I hope." The last part was added under his breath, so that the others couldn't hear.

Edmund then did something that nearly made the King think that he was dreaming, his brother bowed to him no less! "Well then dear brother, you may begin the healing." With that the youngest king grabbed the mysterious item from the desk where it had been placed and handed it to his brother who took in a deep breath before he began reading.

"Mr. Tumnus was walking through the wonderful forests that surrounded Cair Paravel breathing in the clean air and delicious scents of the flowers and fruits that were just ripe. Suddenly the faun stopped, his eyes taking in the loveliest sight…"

Peter realized how quiet it had gotten, turning his head he noticed that Lucy was no longer crying but listening intently instead, her blue eyes staring at the object, her gaze was not of disgust though, as Peter had thought it would be, but of curiosity. Peter let out a sigh, girls really were strange.

"Queen Lucy of Narnia walking ever so gracefully talking cheerfully with Peter's girlfriend Princess Susiana Mercre of Archerland…"

"WHAT!" The High king bellowed as everybody in the room erupted into laughter, the loudest of the lot being Lucy who was now crying tears of joy rather than those of sorrow. Peter glared at them all as well as the screen; this thing seemed to hate him. "Why me?" Peter questioned angrily forgetting about everyone else and the fact that the object couldn't talk for a moment, "Why not someone else?"

"Obviously because you're the easiest to target," The object spoke (well Peter thought so anyway.)

Narrowing his eyes the now true blonde king questioned "how am I an easy target?"

"Let's see…" the object seemed to ponder for a moment before finishing in amusement "It could be because YOU THINK THAT YOUR OWN BROTHER IS SOME TALKING ITEM!"

Peter jumped before turning around to be actually face to face with his red-faced brother, who was currently laughing so hard that he had to grab the desk for support. "I can't believe, you actually thought I was…Ha!" Edmund exclaimed "You, my brother, are a true blonde."

Peter's face was turning various colors by this point; red, blue, purple…it was like a rainbow! And Lucy made sure to point that out, "Your face! It's like a rainbow!" She giggled, completely forgetting that Peter had the object that could make her miserable intill he spoke.

"Lucy just loved Mr. Tumnus! She wouldn't be able to live with herself if anything bad happened to him! Oh, she could picture his handsome face now; with his adorable pointy ears and his gorgeous eyes! And she could never, ever forget his lips that look so irresistible…"

Now, you might think that Peter felt bad for what he was doing, scarring his sister and trashing an old friends memory and all. But the truth was that Peter was so fed up with his sibling's comments that he felt that this cruel way of revenge was acceptable; in other words the High King had finally lost his mind.

"Peter…" Edmund began his eyes widening at his brothers maniac grin, which made him look like an evil scientist. "Put the thing down."

"NO!" The mental King screamed, clutching the object closer and, much to everyone's mounting horror he began stroking it while hissing in a really creepy voice "My precious. My precious…"

Edmund nodded to Caspian who nodded back, before both boys walked towards Peter with one goal in mind, to knock some sense into the crazed King. Once they were infront of him Caspian spoke calmly "Peter, I'm really, really sorry about this."

Edmund snorted "Speak for yourself, I've been waiting for an opportunity like this."

With that boys raised their fists, much to Peter's confusion "What are you…" But he didn't get to finish because at that moment both fists launched forward, hitting the King squarely in the face causing him to stump to the ground unconscious.

It was silent for a few moments intill Lucy spoke "Can I kick him?" The three eldest turned raising their eyebrows at the young Queen; "What? You guys can't have all the fun."

Caspian shook his head "It wasn't fun Lu,"

Edmund chuckled "I thought it was pretty fun."

Caspian raised his eyebrows at Edmund, who merely shrugged in return. After a few seconds of silence Caspian turned away from Edmund and asked, "So…what do we do with him?"

To everyone's surprise the Valiant Queen smirked evilly "I want revenge,"

Susan frowned "How are you gonna get revenge Lu? He's unconscious."

Lucy only smiled wider "He can still have nightmares." With that the young Queen took the object from her fallen brothers' hands and began to search. The three other merchants exchanged grins; this was gonna be fun.

So…Did you guys like it? Sorry if it wasn't as good as the other chapters. But I still would like to know your opinion if it was good, ok or just plain bad. Oh and one other thing, I might be changing my Username soon to The Girl who Loved to be free or something like that. Just wanted to let you guys know. Till next time!