Oh my gosh, everyone, the last few reviews I've gotten.. They were so great. Seriously. I have a couple thank yous and such at the bottom.. Won't waste any precious reading time up here! Haha enjoy this next chapter and I hope you're surprised by who got out to greet Katniss…
Suzanne Collins is who I owe so much to for writing The Hunger Games
xxxxx
"Well, well, well!" shrieks the voice of none other than Effie Trinket.
Her voice sends ripples of resentment through me. I'm sure I look like a blundering idiot because I don't move or speak, I just stand there astonished. "Katniss Everdeen," she says in her stuffy Capitol accent that has yet to give way. "I would think a proper hello is in order, would you also?" I sputter in my response still not believing my eyes, "Uh yes, he-hi, Effie." She rolls her eyes, "We might as well go. Are you all ready?" I nod and grab my little bag. She lets me enter the craft first.
We sit a little uncomfortably for the first half hour or so. I look at Effie for the first time. She has traded her all pink attire for an all red one. Her hair isn't short, but longer, past her shoulders and it is pin straight. It is a raging red color that matches her lip stick. Her jacket and skirt are both a bright blood color with her shirt being a slightly lighter color. Her skin is extremely white, whiter than I would think natural. Knowing Effie, it probably is anything but natural.
I think she notices my stare because she straightens out her skirt. She looks right back at me and speaks quite stiffly, "My sincerest apologies on your mother. It is quite sad."
"Thank you. Uhm, Effie, why are you here?" I didn't mean for it to sound so cold, but it comes out that way.
She's taken aback slightly but rebounds quickly, "You need an escort, do you not? This was the condition made for you to visit your mother while still under District Restriction. Believe me," she scrunches her nose. "This is not the ideal situation."
Effie seems less energetic. She isn't bouncing off the walls or in her seat, she's calm and collected and if she hadn't spoken I would never have known this was the same person. We fall into an interesting silence-it isn't uncomfortable, but it isn't welcome either. We stay this way until we reach my mother's new home district. I see the water and am immediately reminded of Finnick and Annie. My heart skips a beat and I feel like I can't breathe anymore so I grip my chest and close my eyes willing myself to forget the friend lost and the woman who will never be whole again. I feel responsible but I can't let myself think that way. I can't beat myself up knowing there will be a small boy in the world fatherless at my own doing.
A stray tear falls down my cheek anyways and I quickly wipe it away.
Effie seems to know where we are better than I and she tells me of our plans, "We are near landing. When we get to the hospital we will quietly and quickly walk in. You will not wander and you will stay with me for the duration of your visit. We will stay in the area your mother is in and then tomorrow morning at dawn we depart. Is that understood?" I shake my head so she knows I don't plan on breaking any of her rules.
There is a brief sense of free falling and I think I'm going to wind up on the ceiling of the hovercraft. Before I can actually lift fully off the seat gravity takes over and I'm slamming back down. Then I feel the vehicle come to a halt and at that I'm filled with dread. I can't keep putting off my dying mother in my mind. Now I have to see her and now I have to see her dying. I have to watch the woman that gave me life, lost her own life after her husband's death, and cared for me in District 13, die. I don't think I can.
I remain seated fearful of meeting a dead corpse for a mother. It isn't like I haven't known her to be as if she were dead-because she was like that after my father died, but I knew she still had air running through her lungs and a beating heart. Now I don't even know if she's still among the living. No matter how I feel about my mother, especially when she mentally abandoned us, I still love her. I would never accept her help, nor would I ever accept her pity, but she still is my mom.
"I would think you would be a little bit faster at getting up when it comes to seeing your mother at this time." Effie says, interrupting my thoughts. I nod and know she's right. I need to face whatever it is that waits for me in this building. We get out of the hovercraft and walk towards the doors. Not only is Effie by my side, but there are also four other big statured men, I assume them to be body guards. I don't think they're guarding me so much as guarding everyone else from my rash decisions. They are all around me and I'm starting to feel closed in and I try to shake the feeling.
We have to check in with several people before I'm even allowed out of the in between area that no one ever goes to. All I want to do is see my mother and stop putting it off. Not knowing has always struck me and made me beyond anxious. "Just one more person to sign off with and we're free to move onto the next floor." Effie says. The next floor? "Do you mean we have to do this at every floor?" I say enraged. "I just want to see my mother!" I yell. The whole floor hears me I'm sure of it. Some very big man came up to us and looked down at me. My first instinct was to survey the area and find something I could use as a weapon. Turns out, that plan was unnecessary. "Very well," Big Man says. "You will be taken there, no detours, no nothing." He had a very authoritative voice, even the sound of it made Effie shrink back.
Four more big bodied men tell us to follow them to my mother's room. Eight men in all are accompanying Effie and I. Just how many men do they think is required to walk me across a hospital? But then again, I did go mad and kill two presidents with one arrow. The memory hardens my stature and I put on a tough face.
My entire party and I have come to a halt four flights of stairs later right outside a room numbered 428 with a card underneath it that said, "EVERDEEN" in big, thick letters. I full out run to the room until I was stopped by a very steady hand. It was one of the body guards with a list of things I wasn't allowed to do. Run was one of them. I gave a frustrated sigh and walked painfully slow into my mother's room.
What I see next is something I think would be only possible in my nightmares.
There she is I finally see her. She looks nothing of the woman I left in District 13. The woman before me has dwindled down to nothing more than skin and bones. She looks like a skeleton with a thin covering passing for skin. The skin that is visible has a green like tint to it and it looks paper thin. Her eyes have sunken into her head and her cheekbones are predominant. Her hair is a salt and pepper kind of mixture between dark and gray strands. They look extremely brittle and like they are about to fall out any moment.
Basically, my mother looks decomposed. Yet, her eyes darted over to us as soon as we walked in. I threw caution to the wind and I ran to her hoping the body guard wouldn't tackle me to the ground first. He didn't. I reached my mother's bedside and I knelt down taking her hand in both of mine. She felt ice cold and the temperature difference between us shocked me into dropping her hand.
"Oh, Mom.." I say and my tears are not restrained anymore. She turns her head to face mine and does what I assume is an attempt at a smile because the corners of her mouth twitch. "Katniss.." Her voice is course and sounds almost demonic. She clears her throat and tries again, "I was never.." There was a pause. "a good mom-to you-I have-so much to say-but I can't-get it out." Her breathing has become too labored and I shush her. "You did the best you could." I reassure her. I do believe this because even thinking Peeta was dead, I was nothing. I can't even imagine losing someone like that and still having to take care of children. I now understand.
"No." She is firm.
"It doesn't matter to me anymore," I say. "I finally understand. I love you, mom." And we both have tears falling from our eyes at this point. We needed to say these things and now there are no regrets, and now ironically that we are on the same page, I'm losing her. She is my only family left and she's dying from an infection that she received trying to save other people.
I sit with her at the end of her bed for a long while. During that time we cried, laughed, talked, and remained silent. I told my mother a lot of things I never thought I would, like taking care of Peeta. I mostly talked and she said a few things when she could. It was nice for us to be like this, I only wish I had more time with her. More time is always needed in situations like this. But of course, time waits for no one, time doesn't wait for me.
Just like that, it's all taken away.
"Peeta and I take care of one another. I think I now understand what you felt like when Dad died.. I have felt like that on so many occasions thinking he is dead," I suppress a cry. "Aside from you, he's the only family I have." My mom looks sad and I know we're thinking of the other person missing from our little family.
"I miss her-too, Katniss." My mother gasped out.
It was the last thing she said before she started coughing uncontrollably. The coughing then turned into spitting blood and I panicked. I went to her side and looked at one of the body guards just standing there unsure of what to do.
"Don't just watch her, go get a nurse!" I scream at him. He ran out of the room and soon the whole space is being occupied by nurses and doctors trying to ease her coughing. Effie is in the room soon too, escorting me out. I refused to leave and I get away from her grasp. Then I feel two strong arms tightly trap my own arms to my sides and lift me. Another body guard that I hadn't seen yet is carrying me out. He brings me all the way to the other end of the hospital floor and Effie is close behind. I'm thrashing around trying to undo his grip, but it's no use. I go limp and give up. I don't want to keep trying anymore. The large man sits me in a chair and I sink right into it. Effie sits a couple seats away in her stiff posture. I'm sure the craziness of the situation has made her slightly unraveled.
My only real family was being kept from me and is probably dead at this very moment. On the inside I'm a mess, but I still hold onto not letting strangers see me weak.
About an hour has gone by and I hear a very familiar voice that I can't really place, "Katniss Everdeen?" I look up and I see a rather plump older lady. "Sweetheart, we need to talk." She says.
My body drains of all color and warmth.
xxxxx
Ahhhh Poor mama Everdeen! Don't forget to review and tell me what you think! Is Katniss' mother dead? Will she get to say her final goodbyes ever? Oh hey, what about Peeta? Hmmm never forget the boy with the bread ;) Review!
The chapter made me sad to write.. I won't even lie. I'm so glad to know, though, that people still love my fic. That turns my mood around, so thank you, all of you, even the ones that don't review.
So here are just a few thank yous and shout outs that no one has to read, but I want to say because some are anons.
Shout out to SharonLoves1D for just being super awesome and sweet.
A huge thank you goes out to all my anon reviewers, but most importantly the one that said they cancelled plans to read my fic.. Oh my gosh.. Just thank you for that. I didn't think my story was THAT good! Haha but it brightened my day, so thank you.
Anyone that has ever reviewed – I love you all for all the kind words and helping me through this story it means so much to me so thank you!