Hearts and Diamonds
Chapter 2
Number of words: 1208
Summary: In which Sabretooth gains a new toy, Magneto is as devious as ever, and Gambit is given free reign to be a stalker. Character silliness ahead.
Author's comment: Writing this chapter was fun.
When Gambit had joined Magneto as an Acolyte, he knew he would sometimes be stuck in disagreeable circumstances. He figured it wouldn't be too bad; he wasn't a stranger to them, having grown up in the street, stealing in order to survive. But nothing, nothing, had prepared him for this.
"Why, you mangy furball!" Pyro shrieked. "That last pizza was mine! Mine!"
"How the hell was I supposed to know?" Sabertooth growled.
"You coulda asked before you scarfed down the entire thing! Didn't your ma ever teach you to ask?"
"Didn't your ma ever teach ya to share?"
Gambit saw Colossus' head emerge very briefly in the doorway of the kitchen. After seeing the two, he disappeared, quicker than lightning. Gambit was fairly sure the sound of something heavy being moved was the boy pushing everything he could find against the door of his room. Which of course, left him to deal with Pyro and Sabretooth before they wrecked the kitchen, and then the rest of the base.
This had not been in the job description.
"Alright," he said, stepping in between the two angry mutants and feeling like a complete idiot as he did. "Let's settle this like gentlemen."
"Back off," Sabretooth snarled, not taking his eyes off Pyro.
"Yeah," Pyro agreed. "Go on Cajun, beat it."
"Come on boys, Magneto wouldn't like it if you thrashed his nice base." He slipped his bō staff from his coat, extended it and set it firmly down, so the two morons knew he meant business.
"Then I'll just have to burn him nice and clean," Pyro declared. "How'd you like your meat Sabrecat? Medium rare? Or well-done?"
Instinct told Gambit to jump away, since most painfully cliché one-liners usually led to a full-out attack. Just as he did, streams of fire exploded from Pyro's flame throwers. Sabretooth did the same. Before Pyro could form the flames into one of his ridiculously flashy things, Sabretooth had leapt on to the Australian, knocking down the smaller mutant to the floor. The impact was enough to jar Pyro's concentration, and the flames dissipated.
Good thin' tuh, Gambit mused. Scorch marks were a pain to remove.
"Alright boys, now break it up," he said. "The boss is gonna be home pretty soon, and he's not gonna like seeing you two fightin' like children."
"But he started it!" Pyro's muffled voice came from underneath Sabretooth's bulk.
"Shaddup," Sabretooth growled.
Children, Gambit thought. Those two were exactly like children. God knows how long he was going to be stuck with them. Just the thought of having to deal with this idiocy daily made his head hurt. Dieu, he needed a smoke, bad. But first, he tightened his hold on his bō, concentrating, charging it until it glowed with energy. With one neat swing, he flung Sabretooth away from Pyro. The heavier mutant was a brown blur as he traversed the room and landed on metal walls with a resounding clang, leaving a nasty dent on the wall.
So much for not thrashing the base. Ah well. Magneto could fix that easily. And it was better than scorch marks.
"Thanks, mate," Pyro said as he clambered up, still sounding breathless.
"Y' wouldn't need rescuin' if y' hadn't started it," Gambit returned.
"Well, yer welcome too," Pyro grumbled.
From behind, Gambit could hear Sabretooth getting up.
"I'm going to kill you for that."
This was followed by a snarl so deep it seemed to ripple the air. Gambit thought that it might almost be frightening, if the furball didn't do that almost every five seconds. It was getting old. Completely unfazed by the larger mutant readying to pounce, Gambit pulled a ball of yarn from one of his numerous pockets.
"Fetch," he said, and tossed it. To his amusement and Pyro's utter surprise, Sabretooth complied.
"How the... How the hell didja - " Pyro spluttered, wide-eyed.
"Catnip," Gambit answered.
Sabretooth lay on the floor, batting the little ball of yarn with a hand. He looked perfectly, utterly content, if not a little drugged. Happy even - and Sabretooth wasn't ordinarily a happy mutant, unless he was beating something to a pulp.
"Mate?"
"Yeah?"
"You're a genius."
Gambit smirked. "I know."
Magneto chose this moment to return. He strolled into the kitchen, calm and cool as always, then halted. Gambit could almost hear Magneto's brain going into overdrive, trying to process the scene before him.
"What," he finally said. "Is Sabretooth doing?"
"Playing with a ball of yarn," Pyro said. When Magneto's expression remained dumbfounded, he added "Catnip."
"Ah." Magneto remained transfixed at the highly unusual sight for a few more seconds before turning to look at his other two Acolytes. "Well, let's hope the X-Men don't ever try that," he said dryly. Pyro sniggered, and Gambit felt his cheeks beginning to hurt from the large smirk he wore on his face.
"Where's Colossus?" Magneto asked.
"Holed up in his room," Pyro replied.
Magneto raised an eyebrow, opened his mouth to ask, and evidently decided he didn't want to know.
"Xavier has taken in a new student," he said instead. Gambit felt himself straighten, already anticipating the thrill of a mission. Behind him, Sabretooth made an odd sound - half giggle and half mewl - as he sniffed the yarn, which all three mutants ignored.
"I was a friend of her parents," Magneto went on. "They were both Class Five mutants. And knowing them, she'd have been trained in combat from a young age, and in controlling her powers from the second they manifested. The girl would be a very useful member of our team. I want you all to find out as much as you can about her. We'd need as much information as we can to bring her over to our side. Tell Colossus and Sabretooth when he's not - " Again, the silver eyebrow shot up as the three mutants turned to stare at the drugged mutant. Magneto sighed, then turned to Gambit.
"Gambit, I want you to spy on her," he ordered. "Find out about her powers, figure out how we can persuade her to leave Xavier and join us."
Gambit could feel himself grinning. Persuading a lady? The boss knew him well. And that also meant that he didn't have to stick around the base playing peacekeeper. "Already on it," he grinned.
"And make sure," Magneto added. "You don't get caught."
Gambit widened his eyes and made a noise of faux horror. "Gambit get caught?" he gasped, hands fluttering to his chest. He smirked. "Ain't ever happened yet."
Magento nodded, satisfied, and left the kitchen.
"I'm gonna check this fille out," Gambit told Pyro. "You tell the others, yeah?"
The Australian rolled his eyes. "I know that look, LeBeau," he warned. "Persuade 'er, Magneto said. Not seduce 'er."
Gambit shrugged, feeling a grin quirk his lips. "Same thin' ta me," he said. "'sides," he grinned. "Depends how pretty the fille is, non?"
Pyro snorted. "Remy, you an' I both know you'd sleep with anything in a skirt."
"Not true," Gambit contradicted. "Gambit has his standards."
Again, Pyro snorted, and decided to let it go. Besides, he needed to get hold of a camera and get hold of some very incriminating photos of Sabretooth.
Author's comment: There's an episode - I think it was 'Cajun and Spices' - where Pyro mentions that Sabretooth's somewhere playing a ball of yarn. The image stuck. Oh, and I noticed the Acolytes never ever referred to each other by the first name, which is why I try to avoid that here. I don't know. I'm nitpicking but does that make sense to you?
As always, feed the poor, hungry author.