Those words he spoke were so full of want and desire, I don't know what made me do it but…I think I should. It felt right it felt good to just let go and let myself do it. I didn't care right now what would happen tomorrow, if my mother would hit me, if my friends would laugh and tease me about what had happened.

I softly ran my hand down his thin back gliding the tip of my fingers down his spin. I felt him shiver lightly as my fingertips reached his thigh gripping it tightly I pulled him closer to me as I sat up to press our bodies closer together joining our lips in a soft passionate kiss while pushing him back to lay down on the bed.

Over the years he had always been the tall one but since I hit that growth spurt a few months ago I had passed him, now a few inches taller. I think he loved the fact I was taller now. Kissing me back then he would cup my cheeks and pull my lips up to him but now he would wrap his arms around my neck and lean up pressing his lips against me with the most passionate of kisses I have ever felt. Not held back or controlled like when I was 12.

I laid him below me increasing the fierceness of the kiss as I ran my fingers down below his shirt feeling some raised bumps against his soft skin, the scars always visible and painful looking though they made him look the more beautiful with these imperfections against his pale skin. I parted the kiss heaving a long sigh as I looked up at him, his glasses still in place, his face flushed and his eyes determined to keep me going in this direction.

"I-I'll do it, but…you have to teach me." I timidly told him my voice stuttering lowly, the lump in my throat rising and pulsing behind my voice, making the words feel difficult to produce.

He's lips curved into a side grin, the grin he would give me when he saw my blushing face when he said he loved me. I loved that grin, I wouldn't voice it but I think he knew, my obvious staring at his lips when he would make it giving him that hint.

"Of course Ritsuka, I want you to take my body and make it only yours forever and always." He pulled me closer planting a kiss amongst my forehead before telling me he loved me again.

I think the situation; his embracing warm body gave me the courage to respond back to him for the very first time my true feelings, to be able to voice them without hesitation or a moment's thought.

"I love you too, Soubi."

I felt him release a breath against my skin, before pulling me closer to him, bringing our bodies closer than I thought possible before he whispered quietly into my ear.

"I am so very glad Ritsuka." A sense of relief and relaxed tension sounded behind his words, though as if he had been waiting for those words to leave my lips, waiting for me to voice the same affection he had towards me to him. Those feelings have always been there for him, since the first kiss, since the first time he let me make memories with him. I never thought I could have that 'love at first sight' moment, but I also never thought I would have fallen in love.

My whole life before him was just about getting through each day without making mother have an episode. Trying not to go off and find the nearest whole to die in, or to search for a brother that I didn't know if he was alive or dead.

Now though my life is about going on, moving forward to follow a life that I can make with Soubi. A life that I didn't plan on having, but was glad to have it, either way the darkness sometimes comes back the feeling of not being good enough not knowing what was actually happening around me.

I thought I was just overthinking, going overboard with my thoughts. I guess that's what I should expect since I couldn't remember how I used to be back then, before witnessing Seimei's death.

I shouldn't be thinking about that now, he was here with me waiting for me to keep going. To finally give him what he wanted, what he asked for for so long.

I softly kissed his lips once more before carrying on down his cheek, his neck lightly letting them glide gently amongst the bandages, the name still branded there, I moved to undo them before even being able to remove them he stopped me pushing my hands away.

"Ritsuka leave them on." He smiled gently at me before kissing my fingers.

"No, I want to see you all if we're doing this. I-I want to see Soubi's whole being." I bit my lip softly keeping my stare firm. I really hated them covering his neck, looking as if they choked him, holding him back from who he really was. The name was my brothers but it was also his. He was beloved…beloved by me. He was everything to me that word carved into his neck defined.

I slipped the bandage off unwrapping it from around his neck before throwing it off the bed letting it float carelessly on the floor. I stared at his neck fully scarred with jagged lines and deep wounds. Letting my fingers trace over the raised flesh, following the lines that looked like rose stems with thorns wrapping around his neck. It looked out of place to how he looked, looking delicate and elegant.

Though I can say the lines matched him, soft and deep, like his facial expression when he drew, painting those masterpieces that he showed me often wanting me to show an interest and desire to art. Though I never told him I was always a fan of his quietly aweing and intensely watching as he raised his brush and made the vision in his mind come alive in the canvas for everyone to see.

Leaning in a pressed my lips against his neck feeling him relax and raise up closer to my lips, I continued planting gentle kisses along his neck lightly biting down against it.

"Ritsuka bit harder and suck, leave a mark, I want you to mark me as yours to show others that I'm yours and no one else's." I complied biting a little rougher and sucking against his flesh. I felt him shift and groan softly as I let go of his skin. Examining the red mark before continuing to move down his collarbone my body slowly realizing what was happening as I tried to unbutton his shirt my fingers fumbling and trembling with excitement, anticipation, and desire.

Soubi gently ran his fingers threw my hair as I breathed in deeply releasing it in a steady rhythm before calming down enough to unbutton it fully. He's touch always having the ability to calm my nerves just enough to be able to concentrate on a task.

Pushing his shirt open I continued to kiss down his chest and his stomach gliding my fingertips along his side, before I could reach the seam of his jeans he softly tugged my hair to get my attention.

"Ritsuka, suck here it'll make me feel good." He said smiling down at me as he pointed at one of his nipples. Licking my lips to rid of the sudden dryness that over took them I went back towards the point of Soubi's request. I licked the pink bud lightly before placing my lips against it softly sucking it into my mouth, letting my tongue glide against it.

This sent Soubi gasping raising his hips and back towards my body, his finger nails lightly digging into my scalp. I looked up to see his expression, his eyes shut tightly, breath coming in at slow gasps as he licked and bit his lip roughly.

Talking to a friend, reminded me I should update this. Thank you stranger who confessed to me for reminding me of what I needed to do.