A/N: Hi everyone! As the majority of you have no doubt figured out from my griping in my replies, I've just recovered from a wicked bout of flu (no, it wasn't intentional to drag out my cliffhanger, I swear!) so go easy on me, yeah? That and this is a dialogue-heavy chapter, which is not one of my strong suits, so if it appears jarring in places, I can only apologize.

I know I said I would never reply to reviews that have not been signed in ever again, but in this case I will make an exception because this person had a sensible query to point out with chapter 15:

B4 U XIT: Yes, it is dangerous, but neither of them were thinking clearly at the time. Stupid, I know, but that's what people do.

Oh and let me just say that another person who did not sign in made a comment about Wolf being with Alex that I must say horrified me. This is a Wolf/Alex fic! If you don't support the pairing, don't read this story. That is all.

Wolf was very quietly furious. He'd woken up with a stinking headache on his far too small leather couch and stared at the ceiling for ten minutes while he waited for his brain to wake up and tell him what the bloody hell had happened the night before. His mind promptly informed him, at which point he decided it would be best to write a quick note and go put his head on a railway line.

It took another twenty minutes until he summoned up the courage to get off his couch, make himself some coffee and wake up the woman he'd brought home last night. She was even more hung-over than he was and thus was (thank God!) not entirely clear on the events of the night before. So he offered her a ride home, which she gratefully accepted, returned to his flat with his front door remaining unlocked, sat in the living room and began to call Alex every two minutes for about three hours. Unfortunately, his message box was now full, so Wolf spent about another two hours after that listening in agony to the monotonous beep – beep and having to force himself not to scream when the dial tone sounded again. Oh, and now he owed Eagle an apology for screaming at him to get off the phone in case Alex called when the man had rung up to ask how he was.

In vain, too, as it was nearly five o'clock and he hadn't heard a word out of the boy. Not that he didn't know where he was, now. After the first hour and a half his brain thankfully kicked in and suggested he call Mrs. Harris to ask if Alex had stayed over the night before. On the bright side, it meant nothing happened, but it also meant that Alex was just ignoring him. Not so good.

He was just contemplating getting in his car and going round searching for their house to get a hold of the teenager, when he heard the faint rattle of someone trying to insert a key into the lock with the least amount of noise possible. The soldier went very still, listening hard as the door was gently pushed inwards and tentative steps sounded on the stairs, then receded as the visitor headed towards the kitchen.

He quietly exited the living room and followed him, coming to stop at the kitchen entryway where he saw his ward rummaging through the cupboards.

"Nice of you to let me know you were alive," he tried to be angry, but the words came out timid, something Wolf had never been in his life.

Alex paused. Halting his search, he turned his body so it was angled towards Wolf, but kept his head tilted down, staring at the countertop, as if he couldn't bear to look his guardian in the eye. "Mrs. Harris told me you called. You knew where I was."

"You should've told me where you were!" Wolf countered and was pleased to hear some indignation mustered into his voice. "Do you have any idea how worried I've been?"

"Well, from the hundred-plus calls, I had an inkling." Despite the flippant words, there was no sarcasm or depreciation in his voice. He just sounded tired.

Wolf softened his voice, but an undercurrent of anxiety was still evident in his voice. "It's still dangerous out there for you, Alex. Anything could have happened."

"I wasn't thinking about that."

"Yeah, me neither." Wolf fixed his dark grey eyes on his ward's face and felt that wave of resolve and determination that made him such an excellent soldier wash over him. "We have to talk about it."

Alex gulped inaudibly. "Couldn't we just pretend it never happened? That's what we did all the other times."

"And look where it got us. Come on." Without another word, Wolf spun on his heel and stalked back to the living room stiffly. Alex paused a moment, then sighed and followed him.

They sat down heavily on opposite ends of the couch, as far away from each other as they could physically be. Wolf leant forwards, his elbows on his knees and tried to think of a way to start the conversation. He'd run this scenario through dozens of times in his head but now that the moment was at hand, his mind went blank, an odd and rather disconcerting sensation for someone who excelled in stressful situations. The minutes dragged by, the silence getting more and more awkward the longer they sat there, until Alex finally asked the rather jarring question, "Did you have sex with her?"

Wolf looked at him for a long moment. "No," he said finally, "I didn't. I didn't want to." He saw the teenager's chest decompress as he exhaled. A sigh of relief, perhaps? Other than that he gave no reaction.

"I'm sorry," Wolf said.

"About what?" Alex questioned flatly.

"I shouldn't have gotten angry at you. This is your home too and I shouldn't have brought her home when I knew you'd be here, it was disrespectful. And I'm sorry about the things I said to you, they were cruel and I didn't mean any of it."

"You were drunk." Alex's eyes were glued to the floor and Wolf wished desperately that he would look at him.

"It's still not an excuse and I'm sorry for it." Alex nodded in response, his gaze still averted."I'm sorry I ran out. It was dangerous and stupid, but I . . . I needed to be by myself for a few hours."

Wolf nodded in acknowledgement of the apology, and then cleared his throat. "Is Tom expecting you back?"

Alex shrugged. "I told him I might stay another night, but if I didn't come back, not to worry about it as I'd be here. I figured you'd want to talk."

"We need to, Alex. About what you said . . ." he stopped short, unable to continue.

"What about it?" the boy asked, voice heavy.

Wolf bit his lip lightly, his mouth suddenly very dry. "When did – it, start? You said something about your mission in America?"

The teenager swallowed heavily, a light blush dancing on his cheeks. "I'm not sure when it started. I-I know I missed you desperately when I was gone and when Richard and I were – you know, I um . . . I thought about you then, too." The red in his cheeks grew even more pronounced and his head tipped further still, so his eyes were not visible.

Wolf had to take a moment to gather himself, breathing deeply, "Okay. Fine. So you're attracted to me. That doesn't mean you're in love me."

Alex let out a bitter little laugh. "You think I was lying."

Wolf hesitated. "I think you're a little . . . confused."

Alex gave a disgusted snort and turned his head away entirely. The man continued regardless, clenching his jaw, "Look, Alex, whether you like it or not, you're still a teenager and you're probably going to feel things pretty intensely even when they shouldn't be that big of a deal."

Alex turned back to face him, face incredulous. "I tell you I'm in love with you and you're giving me a lecture on over-reacting?"

Wolf flushed, a throb of anger born of frustration running through him. "I know it sounds preachy, but you've got to admit that when you get emotional you might take things a step too far sometimes."

"That's rubbish!" Alex snapped, his voice rising just short of a shout as his eyes flared as well.

"Oh yeah? So you were in love with me when you kissed me in French Alps, were you?"

Alex froze, staring at his guardian's angry face. A moment later, he swallowed and looked away, "I thought you'd forgotten that."

"Nope. Didn't think it would be a good thing to bring up before now but trust me, I remember; that bloody dream really started to get on my –"

"Dream?" Alex interrupted suddenly, head swinging back up to stare at the man in surprise. "What dream?"

Wolf clenched his jaw, inwardly cursing himself. "I was thinking about it for a while after you did it, trying to figure out what the hell you thought you were doing, so I started dreaming about that part of the mission a lot. I can't control my bloody subconscious, can I?" Wolf glared, embarrassed. "Besides, that proves my point, doesn't it? You kissed me in the Alps, but you weren't in love with me then, were you?"

"No –" Alex began.

"So there you are, then."

"I never said I loved you then!" Alex snapped and suddenly, as quick as lightning striking, he was furious. He leapt to his feet to stand over the soldier, who blinked up at him in surprise. "God damn it, you don't get it, do you? You have absolutely no idea. Ever since I first met you, all I wanted was for you to respect me, even back in Brecon Beacons because I knew that if you of all people could look at me and think I was someone worthwhile, then maybe I had a chance. And then we got stuck together and despite what I believed, we just – just fit, you know? We got along almost immediately. You were the first one who looked at me and saw me, not my age, who understood what I'd gone through and took that into consideration. You treated me like an equal but I still felt that I could go to you if I needed help. Not as a parent, not to protect me, but as a friend, someone I could talk to and trust. You just seemed to get it, and when you didn't, you tried; you worked to get to know me when it wouldn't gain you anything, simply because you wanted to know me. Is it really that difficult to believe I could fall in love with you after all that? I know this came on really, really quickly and I'm pretty overwhelmed by it myself, it almost scares me sometimes, but you can't tell me I'm overreacting or that I'm reading too deeply into simple attraction. There's nothing simple about this. I love you. Honestly."

Clenching his hands and breathing deeply to catch his breath, Alex looked down at the floor. His eyes burned and he desperately hoped that he wasn't about to cry. That would not be helpful right now. Wolf stared up at him for an excruciatingly long time. Gradually, one inch at a time, the soldier eased himself to his feet and reached out, gently laying one hand on Alex's left shoulder, the other hand tenderly lifting the boy's face to look up at his. Alex felt his heart sink when he looked into his guardian's eyes.

"You're right. Your experiences need to be recognized and you're more than capable of being independent. But you are still a teenager, Alex, whether you like it or not and there are some times when we both need to acknowledge that. I can't treat you like a kid. But you can't always be treated as an adult, either. You need to accept that."

Alex closed his eyes against the pain. The place where their skin touched burned and he suddenly felt claustrophobic, an overpowering urge to flee again shooting through him. It hit him, with startling, stinging clarity, what he needed to do. "I think I should call Jack."

He could practically hear the confused frown in Wolf's voice, "Why?"

With an enormous effort, Alex forced his eyes open, meeting the man's dark gaze, "I'm going to ask her to come back from America, so we don't have to live together anymore."

Wolf jerked back from him as if bitten, something approaching horror taking over his face. "What? No, Alex, don't! Don't do that!"

"I can't stay here, not anymore. Not with you."

"You've managed it so far!"

Alex tried to dart around the man, heading either for the phone or the stairs; he wasn't entirely sure. Every time he found his path blocked by his guardian. "But now you know! Being near you every day when I felt this way was difficult enough, but now you know and you don't feel the same and it'll be too painful; I can't live like that! I have to go."

"For God's sake!" Wolf halted his last attempt by grabbing onto his hand, holding him in place. His fingers tightened around the teenager's as he continued, "Why can't you see it? Why can't you understand? Alex, I can't be in love with you! Every adult in your life has used and abused you and I can't be a part of that! I need to be the one you can trust, who won't hurt you, who'll do right by you and I can't do that if I let myself feel that way! Instead of doing what's best for you, I'll want you to be with me every day, I'll want to protect you and care for you and keep you here!"

"Why is that a bad thing?"Alex demanded, a definite note of pleading creeping into his voice.

"Because I'm not good for you!" Wolf cried and there was agony radiating from him. "Look at what happened last night. I got frustrated because I couldn't handle my feelings, so I got drunk, came home and had a stupid argument with you when it wasn't your fault. That's bad enough but I upset you so much that you ran from where you were safe out into the night where a madman is waiting to pounce on you the first chance he gets and neither of us even considered it until the morning after we calmed down. It's not supposed to be like that. A relationship between you and I will never work. Besides the fundamental problems like our age difference and professional integrity, our feelings for each other are too intense, it's not normal and I'm beginning to think it's not healthy, either. We've barely known each other, what, a few weeks? It shouldn't happen like that, nothing about it makes sense. I love you so much Alex; nothing I tried to do to bury it mattered. When I thought you were hurt, I was ready to kill someone and I've felt like that before, but never this badly. God knows what I'm capable of where you're concerned because I certainly don't."

It was Wolf's turn to look down at the carpet, unable to meet Alex's eyes, every part of him shining with shame and distress. It took a moment for Alex to gather himself and his nerve. He stepped forward carefully and bent a little to try to catch the man's eyes. They were dull with sadness when he finally consented to look at him. Alex swallowed tightly and, hesitating, reached out to place a hand on Wolf's chest, directly over his heart.

"Listen to me, okay?" He didn't protest, didn't even react. "There is nothing wrong with the way we feel. It's strange and a little frightening and painful sometimes but it feels good too. Really, really good. Doesn't it?"

Wolf gave him the barest of nods. His heart began to beat thunderously against Alex's palm, belying his stoic demeanor.

"I love you and you love me. And even though there are probably dozens of reasons why we should fight and ignore it, right now, I can't think of a single one."

The hand over Wolf's heart fisted his shirt tightly, clinging on. His eyes darted up when he felt Wolf lay a shaking hand over the back of his, curling around his clenched fist. They held each other's gaze, dark grey and brown, until they both found themselves leaning in, lids slipping down again. It was nothing more than gentle pressure, a light brush of lips but it sent both their heart rates wild. They stood very still, only just connected and then the dam broke quite suddenly. Blood dancing through his veins, Wolf gripped the back of Alex's head, his fingers sliding through thick fair hair, his other arm wrapping around the boy's slim waist and dragging him to his torso, holding him tight. One hand still on the man's chest, Alex flung his left arm around Wolf's neck, keeping him in place as he felt the man's tongue work its way into his mouth and he lost the ability to breath, his lungs deflating rapidly. Neither of them knew how long they stood there, clinging to each other, before they parted, foreheads resting against each other as they caught their breath. Eventually Wolf summoned the will to open his eyes and a smile flitted onto his face as he saw eyes filled with love tinged with lust. He pressed one more light kiss to his lips before pulling back. He dropped his arm from the teenager's waist to capture his hand firmly and, smirking devilishly, lead Alex to his bedroom.