Chapter Four: The Division Bell
The first words out of Sam's mouth were questions about his brother.
"Is Dean okay? When's he coming back? Did he wake up yet?"
John sighed, glowered down at his youngest son but answered tersely, "Dean will be fine. He'll be away for two or three weeks. He woke up while I was driving."
Sam blinked, a little shocked at his father's short-tempered reply. Sam had thought that the hours would mellow his Dad's initial anger at him… apparently not.
"Dad, look I'm-" Sam began but John interrupted.
"I know you're sorry," his father snapped.
Sam flinched and looked down, "I'll make it up to you… and Dean."
John shook his head, "It's too late for that, Sam. You've shown me that you can't be trusted on hunts."
Sam gaped, "It wasn't my fault!"
John practically growled at the boy, "You almost got yourself and Dean killed!"
Sam felt tears well up in his eyes at his father's words but he was determined not to shed them.
John sighed in angry exasperation, "Oh so you're going to cry now? Maybe if you did something right for once I wouldn't have to hound you all the time."
"I'm sorry," Sam whispered and felt tears on his cheeks.
The boy gasped when John grabbed his shoulders and shook him, "Sorry doesn't save lives, Sam, and you need to learn that. Blubbering like a baby doesn't fix anything so I'm sorry but you'll have to man-up and get over it."
John released his son and ran a hand over his face, "I'm going out, I'll be back in a few hours."
Sam snapped out of the stupor he'd slipped into while listening to his father and followed John as he headed for the door, "Dad, wait-"
But the door closed with a snick and Sam was alone again. He didn't move as he heard the growl of the Impala's engine start up and fade as John drove out of the parking lot.
Sam sat down heavily on his bed. His Dad was never going to trust him ever again. He was never going to let Sam go on a hunt again.
Sam wiped his face angrily. He'd blown his last chance for gaining his father's approval.
W
It was dark by the time John returned to the motel. Sam heard the unmistakable growl of the Impala as it pulled into its parking space.
The boy listened as the car door slammed shut and his father fiddled with the keys to his motel room.
Sam breathed a sigh of relief. He was sure his Dad had been at the local bar- something he usually reserved for the anniversary of Mary's death- and likely had one too many drinks.
Sam heard John's door open and snap close and he turned off the TV show he'd been watching to pass the time. His Dad would probably sleep off the booze and be surly in the morning but at least he wasn't going to tear Sam a new one that night.
Sam turned off the lights and climbed into his bed. He lay on his back, thinking about Dean all the way in Blue Earth with Pastor Jim and wondered if his brother was thinking about him.
Sam gave a low chuckle. If Dean knew what he was thinking he'd probably tell Sam to stop being such a girl.
W
A sharp rapping woke Sam the early the next morning. He looked at the alarm clock to see it was five a.m.
The boy stumbled out of bed and peered through the door's peep-hole to see his father. Sam gulped and unlocked the door.
John didn't wait for his son to speak before he growled, "Pack your stuff, we're leaving."
Sam remained where he stood, "Why?"
He'd thought they'd stay in the motel until Dean had recovered; it was only a handful of hours from Blue Earth and seemed reasonable to stay close to Minnesota so they could pick up his brother when the time came. But John Winchester didn't stop hunting for anything; not even with his eldest son laid-up at a friend's place miles away.
"Because I said so, that's why," John snapped in reply.
Sam left the door open but walked further into the room and began shoving clothes into his duffle bag. He hadn't bothered to change out of his jeans and t-shirt he'd worn during the day before going to bed and simply slipped on his sneakers and slid his jacket over his shoulders. Almost as an afterthought, Sam hooked his backpack, still brimming with school and notebooks into to crook of his arm.
Sam watched as John stalked around the small motel room, flinging the bedclothes into a heap on the two beds, eyes sweeping the floor and tiny kitchenette for forgotten objects. He bent down to grab his eldest's bag and paused for a moment when he realized he'd left his in his sons' room.
"Where are we going?" Sam asked as John seemed pleased with the way they were leaving the room and began stomping toward the door.
"Akron," John supplied.
"In Ohio?" Sam asked as he followed his father out of the motel room.
"Yes, in Ohio," his father replied in a mocking voice, "Heard that there might be a shapeshifter there."
Sam nodded but didn't respond. His father had taken on shapeshifters before and from what Sam knew of them they were some sneaky sons of bitches. It was wise to bring backup when fighting a shifter; they could easily get the jump on a lone hunter, even a veteran like his Dad.
John unlocked the Impala's doors and Sam handed him his backpack and duffle bags to go in the trunk. After his father took the luggage without comment Sam slid into his usual seat in the back. He didn't really want to sit up in shotgun anyway, not only because it was Dean's seat but because he didn't want to sit that close to his Dad. Not when John was in a mood, anyway.
John closed the trunk with more force than was necessary and got into the driver's seat. He adjusted the mirror so he could have a view of his youngest son as well as whatever was coming up behind them and put the key in the ignition, starting the Impala with its familiar growl.
W
They drove for a large chunk of the day, neither Winchester speaking much. John stopped for breakfast in Madison at nine in the morning, a little over four hours since they'd left the Chequamegon National Forest.
John pulled into the parking lot of a lonely roadside diner and was already striding toward the door before Sam even gotten his seatbelt off.
The boy followed his father into the diner, bell tinkling as the door shut after him and seated himself across from John when he slid into a booth.
A bored-looking waitress in a pink dress and greasy white apron came over, handed them both a menu and stood chewing a piece of gum as though she was a cow munching her cud.
John's gaze shot to the woman's face, sharp. Sam didn't look up but peered at the menu as though he had forgotten she was still standing there.
"Coffee," John said after eyeing the waitress.
"And you?" Sam jumped a little when the woman turned her attention to him.
"Uh… the same?" Sam peered at his father for confirmation. Coffee was the cheapest drink on the menu, besides water, and Sam decided he could use something warm in his belly.
The waitress raised an eyebrow, probably wondering what kind of parent let their kid- who looked years from needing to shave- drink coffee.
"That's fine," John commented in a 'you can go away now' tone and the waitress sauntered off toward the kitchen.
Sam's stomach grumbled loudly and he kept his eyes fixed on the menu. He heard his Dad turning the laminated pages of his own but he didn't say anything.
Sam bit his lip, he wanted to say something but he had no idea what.
"So, uh, Akron eh? How many people ar-" Sam began but stopped when his Dad told him to be quiet.
Sam nodded and didn't look up when the waitress brought the coffee along with a bowl filled with little containers of cream and milk and a shaker of sugar.
"Know what you're getting?" the waitress asked as if she wouldn't have cared if they'd ordered anything else or not.
"Lumberjack breakfast for me," John answered and closed his menu.
The waitress turned her attention to Sam, "And you?"
"Scrambled eggs and toast," John answered for his son.
The waitress nodded and walked away to fill their orders.
Sam pulled his cup of coffee closer to him, relishing the warmth seeping from the ceramic. He grabbed a handful of milk cups and poured them in. Next he poured in sugar and sipped the steaming drink.
At least its sweet, Sam thought, unable to taste the actual coffee over his additives.
John drank his coffee black, peering over the rim of the cup at his youngest son.
Why can't he be like Dean? Why can't he do anything right?
Sam made a point of not looking at his father, gazing down into the milky contents of his coffee cup.
Why does he want me to be so much like Dean? Why can't I seem to do anything right?
"Here are your breakfasts," the waitress startled both Winchesters from their thoughts, one feeling guilty and the other feeling angry.
John muttered his thanks and Sam gave the woman a wan smile.
Sam hadn't realized just how hungry he was until he saw the food sitting before him. He eagerly grabbed his fork and knife and began eating as though he hadn't had food in days because, except for the chocolate bar the last thing he'd eaten was a half a slice of pizza before going out to hunt the baobhan sith.
Sam had never really liked eggs- he didn't like their slimy texture or sulfurous smell and taste- he was more of a pancake kind of person but he didn't complain, who knew when they'd stop to eat again.
He wished that his Dad would say something to him- the silence was disconcerting- and Sam found himself trying to think of some topic of conversation that wouldn't result in an argument or an annoyed glare from his father.
W
Sam finished eating first and drank his coffee slowly to pass the time. The waitress topped-off his mug twice after reassuring them that refills were free.
John tossed some bills onto the table and stood without a word. Sam followed obediently behind his father as the man walked out of the diner in silence.
Settling in the backseat, Sam peered into the rearview mirror and saw his father's dark brown eyes scrutinizing him.
Talk to me! Sam willed John to speak. Say something! Anything! Yell at me again!
His Dad's gaze turned to the road and the Impala rumbled back onto the road.
Sam sighed and peered out the passenger window. It was going to be a very long drive to Ohio.
1. Edited by BerserkerHellHound! You're the best, Sis!
2. Chapter title comes from a album name of the same name by Pink Floyd.
3. Thanks to cold kagome, LeighAnnWallace, AlxM, SPN Mum, Samstruck, murphy9202, pottyanddweezlbe89, MDarKspIrIt for Reviewing.
4. Thanks for everyone who alerted or favourited.
5. Please review, guys and gals!