Disclaimer: Unfortunately I don't own Merlin or Jar of Hearts, all I have is a car called Rupert and an extensive collection of books and dvds.
Warnings: Swear words, implied malexmale (although not graphic) and Merthur.
Summary: Being immortal means Merlin just has to wait around for those he loves to be reincarnated, and that includes Arthur Pendragon. But in Arthur's last lifetime the two had a falling out meaning now that Arthur is back again, Merlin doesn't want anything to do with him. And he really doesn't care what Morgana has to say on the subject.
Authors Note: I changed the rating to M just to be safe. Plus I was going to need to change it in a chapter or two anyway. Also I'm really sorry for errors, but this hasn't been beta read as I wanted to get it uploaded.
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Anyway on with the story for you...
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Enough
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I hear you're asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms
I've learned to live half alive
And now you want me one more time
(Jar of Hearts – Christina Perri.)
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Morgana Pendragon had had enough. She was not impressed. It was 1pm on Sunday afternoon and her flatmate had yet to return home from going out the night before. To make matters worse she was on bloody hold for the millionth time to the agency that her prattish half brother was assigned to. It had been three weeks since she had shown Merlin that TV interview. That meant three weeks of him ignoring her pleads to contact Arthur. Three weekends of him going out drinking and pulling some random stranger, not returning home till god knows what time, if at all. And three bloody weeks of listening to the same hold music repeatedly before eventually being told that no she would not be able to speak to Arthur, but if she wanted to leave her name and number someone would so their best to get back to her. What was the point in even leaving her details they were obviously weren't being given to Arthur and most likely getting chucked straight in the bin. If he had gotten just one of her messages she knew for a fact that he would have been straight on the phone to her. Hell he would probably have turned up at her office or the flat!
The front door of the flat creaked open and she heard a voice calling to her from the hall.
"Morgana you in?" Merlin asked.
"In the kitchen." She replied, hanging up the phone and picking up her coffee.
"Hey, how are you today?" He asked as he came into the room and sat himself at the table opposite her.
"Would have been better if I hadn't spent the last hour waiting around for you to turn up. We were meant to be going for lunch at twelve." She raised her eyebrow at him questioningly over the top of her coffee cup. "Care to explain where the hell you were last night?"
"You know sometimes I wonder if you are actually my mother reincarnated, instead of my best friend."
"That's not an answer, and that's not what you were wearing when you went out."
"No it's not, that's the beauty of magic." He sarcastically answered. "As for where I was and who I was with, well it's really none of your damn business."
"It is when you are cheating on my brother!" she replied.
"How many times do I have to tell you Morgana! Arthur and I are never getting back together. It's just not going to happen. Not today! Not tomorrow! Hell not even in a millennia's time!" Merlin had risen to his feet and his hands were clenched at his side. "Arthur Pendragon will never again be part of my life because he is the most arrogant, unfeeling, selfish bastard I have ever met!" He was breathing heavily. "Now are you going to shut it about him or should we just call lunch quits?"
"Suddenly I'm not very hungry." Morgana answered. "I think I'll just go shopping instead." She got up and left, giving Merlin a disappointed look as she passed. "I think you are making a huge mistake."
"It's my life, not yours." He sighed and sunk back into the chair. Why wouldn't she just quick trying to forcing him to contact Arthur. It was bad enough that his face was everywhere he looked but she just had to keep bringing him up every single time they spoke. She was like a broken record, and the worse thing was that he really couldn't blame her. He hadn't told her what had actually happened between them. Hell the guy was her half brother and, as much as Merlin couldn't stand him right now, he really didn't want the guy to get his balls ripped off. Although it would be an oddly fitting punishment, if Merlin was feeling particularly vindictive that is.
What Merlin really needed right now was a good fuck to take his mind off things. Sure he had found someone last night at the club he had gone to but the guy had had one massive flaw. He had had a ridiculously large picture of Arthur, topless on some beach, hanging over at the end of his bed. The guy was obsessed with him. It was like he was a teenager, instead of the twenty-two years he was actually was. And try as Merlin might he just found it too distracting to either shag or be shagged by another guy with Arthurs smirking visage staring down at him. In the end Merlin had taken the guy through to the kitchen claiming he had a thing for doing it on the kitchen table. Still just seeing that picture had but a downer on Merlin's whole night. Sleeping under it had only brought back memories he had been trying so desperately to repress. This was all Arthur's fault. If he hadn't pushed it, if he had just accepted Merlin for who he was and not tried to change him, then they would be enjoying another lifetime together.
But that was all it was, shoulda woulda coulda's. There was no point in dwelling on it now. What was done was done. And he was most defintely done with Arthur. No instead of dwelling Merlin would go to the pub and indulge in a pint... or five.
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merlinmerlinmerlinmerlin
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Several hours, two dresses, four tops, a cardigan and a new pair of shoes later and Morgana still hadn't calmed down enough from her latest argument with Merlin to think of what to do next. He was being impossibly stubborn. If only she could find out what had actually happened then she knew she would be able to find a way to fix everything. The problem was Merlin was keeping tight lipped about everything Arthur related and trying to contact Arthur just ended in her wanting to smash her phone. Damn she just needed a coffee and five minutes peace away from the hustle and bustle of Oxford Street to clear her head and think of her next move, and how the hell she was going to contact Arthur. If only she had her magic in this lifetime!
She made her way to the nearest tube station, deciding it was best to go somewhere other than the nearest Starbucks if she actually wanted to be able to hear herself think. Getting off the tube about a twenty minute from her flat she walked to her favourite little coffee shop and ordered a large black coffee before seating herself in one of the corner booths.
She had been sitting there absentmindedly gazing into nowhere when it hit her. She had a plan, a new strategy for getting hold of Arthur. It had been the two gossiping girls in on the table that had given her this latest brainwave, and she was seriously considering reaching over and kissing them both. Who knew the chitchatting airheads could say something useful? Well now Morgana did. Because of these two bimbos she now knew exactly where Arthur would be this afternoon! How the hell they knew in the first place she really didn't care. What she needed to do now was to get across London as quick as possible and to the party that Arthur would most definitely be attending tonight.
She practically leapt out of her chair in her hurry to get to her flat and change into something that would make her at least blend in. Then she began to race back to the tube and over to the hotel Arthur could even now be at.
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merlinmerlinmerlinmerlin
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Never before had the tubes gone this slow. Morgana was sure of it. They were definitely running at half speed, maybe even slower than that. Getting across London was taking forever. Not to mention the fact the heels she was wearing were not making her move any faster. Finally though she was off the tube and back on the crammed streets of London, making her way to what was sure to be an overpriced and overly luxurious hotel. Luckily she had stopped to grab Merlin's emergency credit card before leaving. He had built up a fortune over the years and the little piece of plastic Morgana had stowed away in her purse was a gift he had given her in case she was ever in desperate need. Well getting Arthur and Merlin back together definitely classed as an emergency in her books.
She quickly reached her destination and slowed as she made her way up the steps and into the reception area, making her way over to the desk.
"Can you direct me to the Penn function please?" she asked the lady with the obviously fake smile plastered on her face.
"It's in the Trafalgar Suite on the first floor and along to the left," she replied eyeing Morgana's outfit. "Make sure to have your invite available for security to check."
Morgana gave her a small smile in thanks and made her way over to the lifts. She hadn't yet worked out how she was going to get into the party, just that she needed to get to the destination. She hoped she could just charm her way in and find Arthur. The lifts opened up and she turned left following the corridor till she reached a set of open double doors which had security standing on either side. It was now or never.
"Evening Miss. Can we see some ID and your invite please," one of the bouncers asked as she made her way towards them, acting as graceful and confident as ever. She pulled out her driver's licence and handed it to him. "And your invite too if you please." He asked as he handed back her licence.
"I forgot it." She simply said.
"Well I'm afraid that we can't let you in without it. Security reasons you see." The other bouncer told her.
"I'm Arthur's half sister. Surely I don't need an invite to my own brother's party?" Morgana questioned, giving them her 'are you seriously going to argue with me look?'
"I'm afraid rules are rules," came the reply from the first bouncer, although he was looking slightly unsure of himself. She had that effect on people, especially with the way she was batting her eyelashes at him. "Hey Jack," he addressed the second bouncer after a moment's pause, "maybe you could go find someone to confirm it yeah? Hate for the blokes sister to get turned away because she accidently forgot her invite."
"Exactly, Arthur wouldn't be impressed." Morgana added with a flirtatious smile. "Just tell him to come over and confirm I'm who I say I am and it'll all be sorted."
The second bouncer, Jack, gave a nod and headed off into the crowd to look for the events host, wherever he may be. The first bouncer took this as an opportunity to start trying to chat Morgana up, making her eagerly await Arthur's arrival. She didn't have to wait long for Jack to return. Only it wasn't Arthur he brought with him.
"Hey Lewis, Jack says we've got someone here saying there Arthur's sister? Only last time I checked Arthur was an only child." Morgana turned around abruptly to face the newcomer, she knew that voice. "So what's the fan girls name then?" He asked, still talking to the bouncers and not looking at her. Yes she definitely knew this man, and she certainly hadn't expected to see him here.
"Could you seriously imagine me as one of Arthurs fan girls?" She asked indignantly with more than a hint of disgust in her voice. "I have far too much class for that. And as much as it might turn you on, incest has never been my thing."
The not so strange stranger now had his eyes fixed on her, wide with shock.
"Well well well," he laughed. "Look what the cat dragged in." He took her hand and made a show of bowing over it before raising it to his mouth to place a kiss on it. "My Lady Morgana, my apologies, it has been far too long." He wasn't wrong, it really had been. The two of them hadn't met in over two hundred years, as their lifetimes just hadn't overlapped. But here he the same as ever. He was still charming and handsome and -
"You're drunk." Morgana stated, smelling the districted scent of ale and beer she had long ago learnt to associated with him.
"This is a party." Gwaine replied defensively.
"Some things really never change!" She laughed, hitting him lightly on the arm.
"Like how utterly stunning you are." He countered, grabbing hold of her arm and placing it on his. He waved at the bemused bouncers and steered her inside.
"And Arthur's choice in colour scheme." She added, looking around at the elaborately red and gold decorated room.
The reincarnated knight laughed once more. "You can say that again! I tried to talk him out of it, but he was having none of it."
"Always a stubborn one," she stated with a smile. "So where is my darling brother?"
"Somewhere over in that direction I believe." Gwaine gestured towards where a crowd of girls could be heard making nauseating giggling noises.
"Never one to live in the shadows is he." She commented."Shall we go and tear him away from his little harem?"
"Oh yes lets." He had a mischievous glint in his eye. "I'm going to be his best friend when he sees the delightful birthday present I just stumbled across for him." He said nodding in her direction.
"I didn't realised this was his birthday party." Morgana replied, stopping walking to look at Gwaine. "How old is he today?"
"Twenty-four."
"I'm the younger one again then." She stated smugly. She always preferred being younger then Arthur, like she was in there original lifetime.
"Why how old are you?" Gwaine asked.
"Twenty-two. Twenty-three in a couple of months. Yourself?"
"Turn twenty-four next week."
"How did you find Arthur?" She was genuinely interested. She never had to search for anyone before. Merlin had always found her and with him came everyone else, or so she thought. How could Merlin miss Gwaine being back? And if he'd missed him, who else was out there in this lifetime?
"We went to the same college together and then University." Gwaine explained. "We ended up playing on the same rugby team. Obviously we were near each other when we both turned eighteen and got our memories back. Guest we just stayed close so we could cling to something from the past." He looked towards the crowd of girls that where obscuring Arthur from view. "He was a right mess you know, when they all came back. He never told me why, but well I got enough out of him when he was drunk once to know it was to do with Merlin." He gave Morgana a solemn look. "Something major blatantly happened, because I've never known a lifetime when Merlin didn't come and find Arthur as soon as he turned of age. It's weird, and it's hit him really hard." He gave a humourless laugh. "Hell I've never known a lifetime when he didn't come and get each and every one of us when we turned eighteen! Guess he realised I was too close to Arthur to come see me. Shame, I miss the gangly bastard."
Morgana didn't know what to say. She had been so lucky that Merlin had been there for her. He had come and found her and helped her land on her own two feet. Just like he had in every other lifetime. Gwaine's uncharacteristically serious voice broke through her thoughts.
"I just wish I knew where the hell he was."
"Either too many pints down in the pub or passed out in our flat." Morgana muttered, absentmindedly.
Gwaine froze for a second, before turning to look at her.
"You know where he is?" he said, disbelief lacing his words.
"He came and found me." She answered. "Now we live together on the other side of London." She looked at her companion with a serious look in her eyes. "He told me that I was the only one who had come back. That he wasn't aware of the rest of you, any of you, living in this time."
"So he doesn't know about me and Arthur?"
"No he definitely knows about Arthur, and probably you too." She replied shaking her head. "Even if he didn't before, which he admits he did, Arthurs new career would make it impossible for him not to. He's just avoiding Arthur at all costs. You were right, they had a big argument back in the 1920's. But Merlin won't tell me what it was about. Just that he left Arthur and that he never wants to see him again."
"Whereas Arthur is desperate to find Merlin! I don't suppose you saw his unbelievably unsubtle personal ad he pretty much screamed on that chat show?"
"Oh I saw it. So did Merlin, although he was not happy about it. He went mental! I have never seen him act this way. He's been going out every weekend since on stupidly long benders, that you would be proud of, pulling everything decent looking with a pulse."
"Arthur must really have fucked up last time they met." Gwaine stated. "So no hopes of reconciliation at all?" He questioned, concern obvious in his voice.
"That's why I'm here. I reckon if I can get the two of them in the same room then there is a chance Merlin will remember why he loved him and will be willing to work it all out."
"Well you hope at least."
"Yes hope."
There was a pause as the two of the processed everything.
"Right enough of the pessimism." Gwaine declared. "Let's get you a drink and then I shall take you to reunite with the birthday boy." He dragged her over to the bar. "Arthur is going to be so happy to see you!"
"I'm going to be so happy to see who?" came a voice from behind Gwaine. "And I told you not to abandon me to those bloody vicious fan girls. Some of them are just so damn creepy! And I'm telling you I swear one of them was tryin..."
"Don't pretend you don't love it Arthur!" Morgana interrupted him mid-rant.
"Bloody hell! Where the fuck did you come from?" Arthur asked, wide eyed with shock.
"Nice to see you too." She lend forward and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I'm here to wish you a happy birthday."
"Is that so?" he asked.
"Yes it is."
"You didn't even know it was his birthday till I told you, you filthy gatecrasher!" Gwaine laughed.
"Well I know now!" She stuck her tongue out at him.
"Does that mean you haven't got me a present then?" Arthur joked.
Morgana smirked. "Oh don't you fret brother dearest I got you a present."
"I don't see one!" he responded, looking at her empty hands.
"That's because I thought he might object to being put in a box with ribbon around him." Her smirk got, if possible even bigger as she caught Gwaine's eye.
"He?" Arthur questioned, visibly swallowing.
"Yes he."
"As in my..."
"Yes Arthur, as in your scrawny, immortal warlock,"
"He's here?" Arthur had gone pale and was looking around frantically.
"No not here." Arthurs shoulders sagged. "But I do know where he lives, and is probably at right now" Morgana continued.
"Oh you are just too cruel." Gwaine muttered in Morgana's ear so only she could hear as Arthur announced, "I need to go see him, NOW!"
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Authors Note (2): I've just three things to say...
Firstly thank you to everyone who added this to your alerts and favourites, and a massive extra special thank you to the people who reviewed! Because of you guys I was totally inspired to write this chapter as quickly as possible and get it up for you all. I hope it didn't disappoint!
Secondly xXMistressMadHatterXx I know I told you there would be angrydrunk Merlin in this chapter, but I changed my mind. Instead I am saving him for the next chapter, when he comes face to face with Arthur for the first time in almost 90 years.
Thirdly the reason I didn't get this beta read is becuase really wanted to get this chapter up as I have work all of tomorrow, then I'm going away on Friday morning for the weekend, and when I get back I have a hectic week at work so probably won't be about to update for at least a week (although I obviously will try to do it sooner).
Anyway next chapter Merlin and Arthur finally meet, although Merlin is in no real state to be having visitors...
Please leave me a review and let me know what you think.
Until next time... secretambition xx