Sanashii: Ano I'm sorry for the uh...mistake! I accidentally uploaded the wrong chap for the previous chap but its fine now! I fixed it! Now...why no reviews? -glares-
Chiharu: Because its less interesting?
Sanashii: NO ITS NOT!
Kasumi: Dai dai I see something! AAH FANS! ITS ITACHI!
Miharu: Did he just run away when he saw you?
Kasumi: With a DREAMY blush on his face...
Miharu: NO he was scared of your face.
Kasumi: GAAAAH! -Lunges at Miharu and starts fighting-
Sanashii and Chiharu: Read and review.
Kasumi: DIIIIIIIE! MUHAHAHAH! -throws bombs-
Miharu: YEAH RIGHT! -Takes out a gun-
...
CRAAAAASH!
"GET BACK HERE TOBIIII!"
"NO!"
"YOU ATE ALL MY COOKIES!"
"I LOVE COOKIES!"
"SHAAAAARE!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"THEN DIE!"
Itachi was minding his one business and walking slowly through the halls like some evil guy (which he is..) ready to take over the world (even though that is Pein's job) when suddenly...
He thought he heard the word STAMPEDE when he heard tapping of fast running feet and the next minute... SPLAT
"Hmm hmm hmm..la la la laaaaaaa~ THERE YA GO MY PRETTY LITTLE SHARKIE!" Kisame kissed the fishbowl which had his new baby pet shark in. (He replaced water of it)
"I know you will grow up to become a fearless monster who will eat Zetsu and-" He was interrupted when the bathroom door began to shake and pound.
"LEEME IN WHOEVER IN THERE! TOBI DYING! TOBI BLOWING UP!" Came the voice.
"GO AWAY TOBI!" Kisame yelled.
"GAAAAI! I KNEW DEIDARA SENPAI WAS FROM AL QAEDA! YIKES! RUUUUUUUUN~!" Then, there was nothing. Just when Kisame sighed in relief, the bathroom door...EXPLODED.
"Oww..." He muttered as he picked himself up and brushed whatever dirt there was. "Huh?" He said picking up a weird blue thing which looked like HAIR.
"MY HAAAAAIR!" He screamed as he stared at his new bald head. "YOU GUYS WILL PAAAAY!" Then he stood quiet.
"My baby? Sharkie? SHARKIE NOOOO!" He screamed again as the shark swam through the toilet bowl. A hanging plank just HAD to fall on the flush button and...
"NOOO! WAIT SHARKIE! POPPY'S COMMING FOR YA!" He jumped into the bowl...
"WHAT'S WITH ALL THE RACKET! I'M TRYING TO ******* SLEEP YOU ******!" Hidan yelled from his room.
"RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!" Tobi screamed running past him.
"Huh?" Hidan said. Too late. CRASH!
"Five hundred thousand and two...five hundred thousand and threee..." Kakuzu counted.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"
"...Five hundred thousand and four..."
"YOU'RE DEAD TOBIIII!"
"...Five hundred thousand and five..."
"NOOO SEMPAIIIIIIIIII!"
"GRAW!" Kakuzu shoved his money back inside his huge safe an bolted it. Then grabbing a handful of cash he made his way out.
"OI! BAKA! TAKE THIS MONEY AND SHUT UP!" He threw the money out.
"THANK YOU!" Tobi grabbed it and started making balls of them.
"MY MONEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" Kakuzu yelled, alarmed. But tobi hung them over a candle and lighting them, threw them at Deidara. "DIE SENPAI!"
"NO BAKA! I'M HOLDING LIGHTER FLU-"
KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.
Pein looked up angrily from his work. 'What's with all that noise? And the sun just rose up!'
BOOOOOOOOOOM!
He started writing faster. His newest plan to take over the world and capture the kyuubi was going to be a success! Tilting his head back, he once prepared for his 'evil genius' laugh.
BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBTTTT!
He covered his mouth. "I did NOT just do that!" He muttered shocked. How the hell could he sound like a...a...
BBTBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBTT!
"Wait a minute...that's a trumpet!" He shot up.
"I DECLARE WAR AGAINST YOU ADMIRAL TOBI!" He heard Deidara yell.
"YOU SHALL DIE COMMANDER DEIDARA SENPAI! YOU CANNOT SURVIVE AGAINST THIS IMPENETRABLE VENUS FLYTRAP!"
"THAT'S ZETSU YOU IDIOT!"
"HUH? Oh...ZETSU! EAT COMMANDER DEIDARA SENPAI!"
"TOBI YOU CHEATEEEEERRR!"
"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIII THE BOMB IS ON THE TV!"
On cue Pein heard a deafening explosion.
"They better have NOT!" He quickly flew out of his office and the sight before him nearly made him faint. If he wasn't such an evil genius (self proclaimed of course) he would have gotten a heart attack, fallen to the ground gasping for air, run a hospital bill, made Kakuzu faint, run another hospital bill, have hoards of worried fangirls at his hospital room and then finally died.
"NONNOOOOOOO!NOO! NOOOOOOOO!" He screamed.
There was no living room. The couch and the tv was completely blown. The ceiling and the floors were pitch black. He slowly staggered out into the hall.
"PEIN SAMA!" Konan ran to him. "IT'S HORRIBLE! TOBI AND DEIDARA ARE CAUSING HAVOC! ITACHI IS COMPLETELY FLATTENED, KISAME CAN'T GET HIS HEAD OUT OF THE TOILET BOWL, HIDAN WON'T GET DOWN FROM THE CEILING, KAKUZU IS GOING OT FLOOD THIS PLACE WITH ALL HIS CRYING BECAUSE $100 GOT BURNT!"
Pein nearly dropped his jaw to the ground. What he saw exactly matched her description of the place.
"Heeellppp meeee..." A hand shot up to his robe.
"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" He yelled jumping it the ceiling. "ZETSU! WHEN DID YOU TURN INTO A ZOMBI?"
"Not only meee..." He groaned. 'Water! Give me WATEEERRR!"
Konan tossed him a water bottle.
"WATER! MUHAHAHAHAH! MUAHAHAHAH! WATAAAA!" He grabbed it.
"Let's escape." Pein muttered running off. Konan followed.
"Oh..." he muttered as he saw the condition of the rest of the place. "That's it..."
"Huh?" Konan strained her ears to hear better. "Speak up!'
"THAT'S IT!" He yelled. "GET THE BLOND AND LOLLYPOP MASK HERE NNOWWW GRAW!"
"Deidara and Tobi?" She asked uncertainly.
"YES THOSE TWO! HURRY UP AND KICK THEM INTO MY OFFICE DAMMIT!"
Konan saluted and then ran to catch them with a grin on her face. Pein chuckled.
One minute later...
"AAAAAAAHHH!" The two screamed as Konan kicked them into the office.
"Itaaaiiii! Oww owww..." Tobi picked himself up and rubbed his arm. "Tobi arm hurts!" He whined.
Deidara scoffed. "Serves you right yeah! I wish Konan punched your face instead un!" he rubbed his poor head which had a swelling the size of a large frying pan.
"TOBI MAD BECAUSE DEIDARA SENPAI TOOK AWAY TOBI CHAINSAW!"
"YEAH WELL I'M MAD BECAUSE YOU ATE ALL MY COOKIES UN!"
"WELL TOBI-"
"ENOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUGHHH!" The dark voice boomed. Frozen completely, the two turned to face their leader, towering over them like a banshee...only that he was a male...and that his face looked the like the worst nightmare...
"HAVE YOU TWO REALIZED WHAT YOU'VE DONE?" He barked, making Tobi jump onto his senpai and hug him like a teddy bear.
"YOU FLATTENED ITACHI, SHAVED KISAME'S HAIR TO THE ROOTS ND GOT HIS HEAD STUCK IN THE TOILET BOWL THANK GOD HE CAN BREATHE IN WATER! THEN SCARED HIDAN TO THE ROOF AND HE'S REFUSING TO COME DOWN ND MADE KAKUZU FAINT THREE TIMES IN A ROW OF THE HOSPITAL BILLS AND FOR THE LIVING ROOM WHICH IS COMPLETELY BLOWN TO PIECES! HAVEN'T YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY AT ALL? I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD EXCUSE!"
Silence...
"WELL? ANYTHING TO SAY AT ALL?"
Deidara dropped Tobi to the ground and then smiled sheepishly. "Well er...can we just say it just happened...in an accident...un?" He asked weakly.
"THOSE TYPE OF ACCIDENT'S DON'T OCCUR!" Pein roared. "DEIDARA WAS LIKE THE AL QAEDA AND TOBI! YOU WERE LIKE SOME COMMANDER JUST MAKING HIM BLOW EVERYTHING UP!"
"It all started when Tobi ate my cookies un..." Deidara muttered. "He wouldn't share."
"I bought those cookies fair and share." Tobi protested.
"Its fair and SQUARE. But you have to share anyhow!"
Pein just stared at them with a gaping mouth and bulging eyes. 'All that...for cookies?' He thought seeing stars.
"Err pain sama?" He heard Tobi ask.
"Are you okay un?" Deidara asked.
"BOTH OF YOU TO YOUR ROOMS! NOOWWWW!"
The two ran away at once and Konan ran in. "How'd it go?" She asked.
"We have to find a way to stop those two idiots for good!" He snarled sitting up on his chair.
Konan handed him a cup of coffee. "I got an idea." She said with a smirk.
"Oh really? Well speak up!" He said cheerfully. Konan was the best person who could think of evil EVIL plans...next to Itachi of course. But he was half dead in the hospital with a screaming Kakuzu...
"Do you know that incident where Tobi went crazy? The week before two weeks ago before last month?"
"...Eh?"
"...I am talking about the incident where he thought goblins were in the basement, trolls in the bathroom and Sauron was trying to take over the world when Hidan bought that ring online from Ebay."
Pein furrowed his eyebrows together. "So? What does that..." Suddenly he realized what she was talking about.
"Ahhhhh...of COURSE! MUAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAAA!"
"I'll get the others to dress up like ghosts." Konan grinned and started walking. But Pein stopped her.
"No. I have a BETTER plan...MUAHAHAHAAA! Now...get those two into Itachi's car. Since he can't drive I will."
Somehow, Konan thought he was suddenly...VERY...VERY..CREEPY.
Half an hour later
Deidara looked up at the house...no...MANSION looming over him. He noticed that for some odd reason, there were storm swirling over it and the sky looked grey.
But he knew that the sky was blue and clear less then a mile away from this place.
CREEEEEEPPPPYYYYY...
"Ohhh...Ahhhh..." Tobi said as he. "Whoaaaaa..."
"WHAT ARE YOU OH AH WHOA- ING ABOUT BAKA UN!" He yelled kicking him.
'We have to stay in the creepy place as payback for smashing the hideout? DAMNIT UN!"
Pein looked at his list.
''Dead grass check, dead black trees check, rusty gates check, large mansion which looks haunted check, torn curtains check, cobwebs check, spiders check, bats check, slime check,..."
"Whatcha reeeeading?' Tobi asked.
"YAAAAAAAH!" Pein jumped. "TOBI GO AWAY!"
Tobi whined. "Why? Tobi good boy!"
"If Tobi was a good boy, tobi wouldn't have trashed whole of hideout!"
"But!" Tobi's voice grew more high pitched than usual. "LEADER SAID TOBI MUST BE A BAD BOY TO JOIN AKATSUKI!"
Konan chuckled. "He does have a point Pein."
"I didn't mean he had to literally trash our house dammit!" Pein growled. "AWW HECK! LETS GO!"
Deidara just turned around as the car disappeared over the horizon. "THEY DISAPPEARED! THE NERVE UN!" He yelled.
"Jeez Tobi! Let's go find something to eat un! I'm starving un!" He muttered.
When he heard no answer, he looked around. 'Tobi?' he thought.
"TOBI!" He yelled. Had the little nutter run off? THAT BETRAYER! Right on cue, adding to his frustration, it began to pour cats and dogs.
Something creaked and he spun around to face the house again. The door had somehow opened.
'Did he get in?' He thought. He laughed nervously. Would he? Or did the wind blow it open?
"DEIDARA SENPAIIII!" Tobi suddenly pounced on him from behind. Surprised, Deidara screamed bloody murder.
"DAMMIT TOBI DON'T DO THAT! YOU SCARED ME! WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING RUNNING AWAY ONE MOMENT AND THEN-" He kept on yelling while Tobi just stared at him.
Unknown to him, someone was watching them from inside the house. The thing pressed its hands to the window.
Deidara meanwhile, was getting goosebumps. The chilling rain was half the reason. The other one was that his sixth sense was telling him that someone or rather something was watching him.
He spun around quickly. He sighed in relief when he saw no one and nothing but the creepy house. That's when he saw the hand impression left on the window...
"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"
Pein kept on laughing evilly and even Konan was getting scared.
"Are you sure those two will be OK?" She asked making Pein stop his maniac laughter.
"Of course not!" He said in a matter of fact way. "Those nitwits are going to pay! The haunted house is going to scare the living daylights out of em!"
Konan laughed uneasily. "But who's gonna scare em? You didn't let anyone in our group to dress up!"
Pein shrugged. "I got that all planned. I hired some very scary ghosts!" He laughed. "Let's see they get out of this!"
Konan scratched the back of her head. "Um...can you actually hire ghosts?" She asked.
Pein shrugged again. "Hey. If we can be evil and still have fun like normal shinobi, why can't we hire ghosts?"
He left, leaving Konan to wonder what exactly was the relation between the two. And who the hell did Pein really hire!
"COME IN DEIDARA SENPAI!" Tobi yelled. He was in the house, safe from rain and lighting and was trying to convince Deidara to take cover as well.
"NEVER YOU HEAR ME? NEVAAAA!" Deidara yelled. The lighting then striked him, leaving his hair standing.
"DEIDARA SENPAI! YOUR HAIR LOOKS LIKE LEADER SAMA'S HAIR! ONLY WAY LONGER!" Tobi yelled.
"Gee thanks." Deidara muttered trying to (and unsuccessfully) get his hair down.
"YIKES!" He yelled as lighting striked near to him. 'WATCH IT YOU STUPID LIGHTING! GO STRIKE SOMEONE YOUR OWN SIZE!"
In response, the lightning kept on trying to zap him.
"HURRY! IN HERE! IN HERE!" Tobi waved to the now running Deidara. Having realized stepping inside the house was his only choice, he ran in.
The lighting stopped immediately but the rain continued.
"YOU TRICKSTER!" Deidara yelled.
ZAP!
"Ow.." Deidara muttered after a long while of silence.
"Let's go in the house an explore!" Tobi skipped inside. Deidara sweat-dropped.
"You sound like that stupid little cartoon girl who appears on kid's channel."
Tobi clapped his hands. "DORA THE EXPLORER!"
"Yeah...that midget.."
They stepped inside the house and looked around warily. The interior was the same decoration of what they expected in haunted houses.
The usual cobwebs, torn wallpaper, spiders, bats and stuff.
It made Deidara feel better. "Jeez how lame un." He laughed. But Tobi looked frightened out of his wits.
"S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-SCARY!" He pounced on Deidara. Deidara shook him off.
"Its juts a house un! Now lets just find some food and two rooms which are not demolished un!"
"Demolished?"
Deidara sighed. "Meaning...NOT DESTROYED!"
"Ooohhh!"
Rolling his eyes, Deidara began walking around the place, looking for the kitchen.
"AHA!" He said once he spotted the place. Walking up to the fridge, he held his breath before opening it. If it were unused than probably it smelled horrible.
But when he opened it, he found it literally overflowing with food.
"Wow. Smart leader." He sneered taking out a loaf of bread, meat and other stuff he needed to make a nice, big sandwich.
Keeping the stuff on the table he once again searched the fridge to see whether there were coke bottles. Sure enough he found some.
Taking one in his hand, he then went back to the table, only to find the food missing!
"TOBI! I DON'T LIKE SUCH JOKES UN!" He yelled.
There was no reply.
"Jeez." He started rummaging the fridge again after placing the coke on the table.
When he came back with some more stuff, the coke bottle was gone.
"THIS AIN'T FUNNY TOBIII! UNN!" He yelled. He was starting to get irritated.
This time, after keeping the food on the table, he pretended to rummage the fridge again, only this time, he was secretly eying the table.
To his ultimate surprise and horror, the food started floating and flew out of the room!
"THIS PLACE IS HAUNTED UN! TOBIIIIIIIII!" He himself flew out of the kitchen.
"TOBI WHERE ARE YOU UN! TOBIII!"
He ran to the door and tried to open it. "LOCKED? HOW CAN THAT BE WE JUST ENTERED! I KNOW I'LL USE-"
He held up and empty clay bag.
"My explosion clay...I'm doomed." He muttered. "YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" He started banging.
"Waaaaiiiit. Leader set this all up! I'm not supposed to get scared!" He laughed slowly calming down.
"Yeah! He did this! But then...where is Tobi the fraidy cat?" He widened his eyes when he heard a bloodcurdling, high pitched scream.
Instead of rushing to save his teammate, he ran under the table and hid. He wasn't worried for Tobi ran faster than him (having more experience in running away from his bombs and crazy ninja other than Akatsuki and Snake people of course)
"Please don't find me crazy ghost un! Please don't find meee un!" He wished out loud.
He thought he saw a white dress go across him then, in a quiet way. "Whep!" He covered his mouth.
"Grrrraaaa...grrrrrrr...raaaaaaa..." A choking sound came. It reminded him of the death rattle someone used to do very well back in the hideout...
'Konan!' He grinned jumping out of the table and tackling the woman. "hahaahaha! I got you un!" He declared.
"SENAPI NOOO!" He heard Tobi call. "SHE'S THE GHOOOOST!'
Slowly Deidara looked up at Tobi who was being held captive by...by...
"A GHOST UNN!" He yelled jumping up. The ghost had short black spiky hair, red eyes, pale skin, sharp teeth and was dressed in a blue yukata.
"A VAMPIREE!" he screamed again.
"GEEEEEEET OFFF HEEEEERRR!" The male ghost growled. Deidara looked down and saw that the female ghost looked way creepy with that glowing green eyes and loooong unidentified hair color in the dark...
"CRIPESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!" he jumped to the ceiling.
"Hello." Another male voice chuckled right behind him. Slowly he looked behind and found himself face to face with glowing red eyes, canine teeth and... spiky yellow hair?
"ANOTHER VAMPIRE!" He jumped as he saw the hanging upside down guy in a cloak.
"ITS TWO VAMPIRES AND A WRATHFUL ONRYO*!" Tobi yelled.
"I KNOW YOU IDIOOOOT UNNN!" Deidara began to run.
"Oh wait I can't leave the chicken here un!" He ran back to the black haired vampire. "May I have him back un?"
"Why?"
"Because he's my teammate un."
"I was going to kill him."
"...What if I intervene un?"
"Then I'll kill you too."
"...oh. RUN TOBIII UNN!" Deidara kicked the vampire and the two began to run.
"QUICK! UPSTAIRS UN!" Deidara pointed to the stairway.
"BETTER! AN ELEVATOR!" Tobi pointed.
"That's a dumbwaiter but...oh well. It's faster un. HURRY!" Deidara began to run.
But in the dumbwaiter someone popped out. Someone taller, had white hair..dressed in rags with straw sticking out...
"Hallo! Ready to die?" The scarecrow asked.
"FORGET THE DUMBWAITER TAKEE THE STAIRS UNN!" Deidara ran with Tobi running faster than he was.
"YOU CANNOT ESCAPE!" The vampires echoed.
"GRAAAAA!" The onryo croaked.
Running up faster, they saw the attic. "QUICK! THERE!" They ran in and locked the door.
"WHAT DO WE DO?" Tobi shrieked.
"BARAAGE THE DOOR! TOBI GET ME THE FURNITURE!" Deidara yelled.
At this, Tobi began flinging the furniture to his senpai.
Soon the door was blocked with all furniture.
"Whew! That's gonna hold em for long! But I think we need one more furniture piece, just to make sure. Tobi see any more?" Deidara asked.
Tobi looked around. 'Uhh...umm..."
"Graaaa..." A hand gave a vase to him.
"OH THANK YOU GRUDGE GHOST!" Tobi snatched it away and ran to Deidara.
"Graaaaa."
Suddenly the two Akatsuki members froze. Grudge ghost?
"Graaaaaaaa..."
"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!" They crashed through all furniture adn the door itself and ran downstairs to the door.
"LET US OUT! LET US OUT!" They began banging on the door. As the four creepy things began to stagger towards them.
Pein stared at the house in front of him.
"I think I heard enough screams. Shall we open the door?" Pein asked.
Konan shrugged. "I think they learned their lesson."
Pein took out a key and opened the door and the two stumbled out and lay on the ground.
"Had enough?" He aasked.
At this the two sprang up.
"YES WE HAD ENOUGH! DON'T MAKE US GO BACK THERE!' They hugged Pein's legs.
"Graaaaaa!" The croaking sound came.
And then the two fainted. Konan stared at the four wide eyed.
Pein took out a thick stack of cash. "Here. Good job." He said.
"Graaaa!" The onryo said.
"Thank you." The scarecrow rasped.
"YOU PROMISED US FRESH BLOOD!" The black haired vampire growled.
Pein rolled his eyes. "Its in cans in the fridge people. Jeez you konoha ninja are too clingy on your jobs."
"Konoha ninja?" The yellow haired one asked.
"Ahhh yessss! We AAARE konoha ninja." The black haired one grinned.
"Let's get out of here." Konan dragged the two unconscious men to the car's backseat.
"Kay. Bye bye Hatake Kakashi and your students! Thank you for assisting us!" Pein got into the car and drove off.
"...Who is Hatake Kakashi?" The scarecrow asked.
"Never getting out! Never getting out! Never getting out! Creepy vampires scarecrows and grudge ghosts!" Deidara whined.
The nurse tsk tsk-ed. "He's got a baaad fright. Oh well. he'll calm down in three days." She said and then walked to Tobi who lay unconscious.
"And he will stay unconscious for a week I presume. No worries after that though." She said.
"Thanks doc...what about Kakuzu?" Pein asked.
"The money loving freak? He is still in a shock after he found out the price for the treatment of these two. Currently he's sueing the doctor for god knows what."
"Thank you." Pein muttered. ''Atleast they'll stop breaking the hideout."
Konan then looked up after being in deep thought.
"Ya know...It seemed too unnatural. The makeup was too good to be fake. And how those vampire actors were staring at our necks...brrr!"
Pein sighed. "Oh calm down. Hatake Kakashi and his students are marvellous actors!"
"So marvellous you forgot it was a wonderful opportunity to grab the Kyuubi?"
"...DAMN I FORGOT! Oh well. Next time." As he finished, his phone began to ring.
"Hello?" He said.
"This is Naruto Uzumaki dattebyo! Sorry we couldn't go to the haunted house for the acting but errr...the hokage said it was a trap soooo...sorry dattevyo!"
"Eh? What the-? Oh hell stop this jokes!"
"I am not dattebyo! I really-"
"What's with all that dattebyo? You didn't say it back at the haunted house gag!"
Konan tapped him on his shoulder. "Dattebyo is the REAL Naruto's catchphrase..." She said quietly.
Pein widened his eyes and gulped.
"Hello dattebyo! Hello? Sorry again dattebyo! Bye!"
The phone went dead. Pein laughed uneasily. "Just cuz its near Halloween doesn't mean its ghost season!" He siad.
Suddenly his phone ran again.
"Hello?"
"You will die in seven days..." beep beep beep.
The phone crashed to the ground.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"
CLIFFHANGER! Hhehe. I know its a bit late but happy halloween anyway! ^^